Ginny Hears A Song.
Songfic- Carousel, by S. J. Tucker.
you were the ink in my eyes black with blasphemy
from the night before
Ink. The entirety of our relationship. Our reality.
the sweet sacrifice that you offered was bitter
dark chocolate, savored it down to my core
You took everything I had. Still, I wanted to give more.
where I smolder
no wonder
I am frozen today
Your ice was my anathema. My heaven. How wonderfully horrific it felt to be destroyed.
The carousel runs on, and I hum along
Hum the morning away
I ignored it. What you were doing to me. Went along for the ride. The ride of my life. Go on and tango the Gorgon to bed, my dear
best be prepared to get all that you bargained for
and when the curtain comes down
these decisions must be made
It's morbidly ironic that I fell in love with you as you dried my tears for another. It's downright twisted that while you were there I loved him, and now you're gone I love you. I always did. Couldn't see it while you were just a pen-stroke away.
On the day that the carnival heads out of town
leaving no trace, just a music box melody running down
would you caravan at my side, my love, will you ride?
I would have gone with you. If you'd asked. Followed you to the ends of the earth, cliché as that sounds, it's true. I did love you. And now, there's nothing left. See how we smolder
no wonder
I am frozen today
The carousel runs on
and I sing along,
dance the morning away, hey
I was so happy. When you were here. I rejoiced in the pattern of bloodlust, if only because it made you happy too. oh, don't trust the sideshow serpentina
shadows run fierce when the curtain comes down
but no fiercer than those you may find
looking into these eyes
Look into my eyes.
I knew, theoretically of course, how evil you were. What no-one, including you, realized was that I am just the same. I matched you perfectly. Hell, I was worse. Oh, I know what they say about me, the perfect child. Sweet, innocent little Ginny could never do anything like that. They're right, actually, Ginny couldn't. But Ginevra? Ginevra is another matter entirely. No-one can see my shadows. Oh, you were the truth of my running mascara
the moment my mask was no more
I offered me up sweet and bitter,
suspecting you'd courage to savor me down to my core
where I smolder
He thought I cried because I was scared. And I was. But not for the reasons they think. I was terrified of losing you.
no wonder I am frozen today
the midway is breaking down
do I let this miracle stay, or do I cast it away
I would choose to keep you. If I could. I hope you realized that.
No wonder I am freezing, bleeding today
with the carnival I will leave town
like the melody running down
but darling for now
let the carousel play
running away
Now, all I have are my memories. How ironic is that? But losing myself in them helps, sometimes. Sometimes I can forget the ragged edges of the wound where my heart should be. They will all say
don't trust the sideshow serpentina
shadows grow long when the curtain comes down
but no longer like those you may find
gazing into these eyes
Look into my eyes.
I am an empty shell now. Inhabited only by the shadows of memories. I wonder, would you recognize me? If you saw me now. I am empty.