Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon or the song. What's the point of this?

Very important A/N: Listen here, I don't want to be flamed because of the song I chose. I have a very strange taste of music, and I know that Hilary Duff has a very big hate-base, but I thought that this song would be good for the situation. All flames will be used to roast marshmallows. Yummy, can I have dessert yet? Passes marshmallows around to all members of the chocolate pie fan club And I'm using some OTs from my other fics.

Title: Anywhere but here (A one-shit... I mean one shot)

Summary: A game of 7 minutes in heaven becomes 7 minutes in Hell for May Maple, when she has to kiss her crush... Brendan Birch. (Hoennshipping) AU to all my fics and Pokemon Advance.

You have been invited

To a gathering of Pokemon trainers

On the 12th of May, 2004.

Tell all siblings and friends.

I stared at the invitation card hard. Was this true? A Pokemon trainers' gathering? I thought that no-one would dare to have one of those after my disaster 2 years ago. Yet the invitation clearly stated that it was for all to attend, from lesser-known trainers to the Pokemon master, Ash Ketchum. I had had a crush on him 4 years ago, when I was 12 and he was 14. But that was pure crap now. Besides, I moved on to someone else and he started dating Misty. They make a great couple.

As for me? That stung for a while, but I moved on to someone else. Yet the likeliness of me actually getting together with him was absolutely nil. 0 %, no way, forget it, adios. He used to live in Hoenn next door to me, but he moved away to goodness knows where last year. I shed gallons of tears then.

Lovely ruby eyes, silvery-white hair, a 5'9 stature, and a Torchic named Torch perching on his back. That was him. The prince of my heart. Brendan Birch, the best-looking guy in the world, ranking before even David Beckham. How could he like a bitch like me? He had called me one to the face before two years ago, when we were arch-enemies. Our parting had been one full of sadness, however, as we learned to accept our differences and become friends. Yet I like him as more than a friend. Remembering him, tears came to my eyes.

I sighed, and went downstairs to call my brother, Max to tell him about the party.

"Ring..." Why wouldn't Max pick up the phone? I swore mentally, then decided calling Wally's to see if they were there. They, as in Max, Wally and their friend Katherine, known widely as Kat, Ashgrove City's gym leader- also known as the terrible trio. After Ash, Misty and Brock, trios of Pokemon trainers had become popular. Wally, Max and Kat. Ex, Flannery and Maddie. Me, Lisa Oak and Brendan. And those were only the more widely known ones. Actually, I'm sure that our group was only famous because of Lisa, who is the granddaughter of Professor Samuel Oak. Oh yeah, and because I won the Hoenn league, Brendan was runner-up and Lisa's a total nut.

"Ring... Ring... Hello, this is the Matsuki bakery. Please place your order." Max's voice came out of the phone.

"Grow up, Max. May I speak to Wally?" Sometimes, I just want to punch that boy in the face. I can see why he's 14 and still single, and has never had a crush: He still acts like a 10 year old.

"Sorry, he's too busy smooching Kat to talk." I heard kissing noises in the background. I automatically assumed that it was Wally and Kat.

"Fine then, Max. Why didn't you answer the call when I first called you on the Pokenav?" I enquired. Really, that boy can be a real pain in the ass and in the neck when he wants to.

"Err... I think that I..." I could almost hear him sweatdrop. Mission: Torture Max mentally was working well. "Why did you want to speak to Wally anyway?" Just like Max. Forever shirking from responsibility. I decided to let him off easy this time round, however. After all, I could get him later. If there was a later, if I didn't die with sorrow over thinking of Brendan Birch. Why did I have to be so melodramatic?

"Anyway..." I closed my sapphire eyes, and smelt the brownies baking in the kitchen. I thought maybe I could bring some to the party. If I decided to go. "There's going to be a Pokemon trainers' convention. Wanna go? The host- guy told me to tell you. Whoever he is."

"I don't know..." my adopted brother replied. Why does the twit ask so many questions? I asked myself.

"Just go, you overgrown baka from outer space." I replied angrily. That boy could really make me mad when he wanted to.

"Fine then. Come and pick the three of us up then, okay? And Momentai!" That boy has been watching too much Digimon Tamers.

"Whatever. Bye." I slammed down the phone. Annoying bastard, I thought. Looking to my left, I saw a picture of the three of us last time. Me, Lisa and Brendan- the hottest prospects back then.

But that's all over now. Put the past behind you, girl. Move on to the future. I sighed, and realized with a shock that my brownies were burning. Just like my hopes to be with Brendan. My sweet Breadhead.

"Hey, May! Looking fine!" I heard Misty shout from the window of the Ashgrove gym. The reason Kat wasn't in it (the gym) was because it was being renovated for the trainers-only-party. I smiled back at her, and Max waved. Wally and Kat had already left my new car, hopefully to get a room. As for me? I was just leaving the car, blocking all thoughts of Brendan Birch from my head for once.

As I walked down the hallway, young trainers started whispering to each other about goodness knows what. I held myself with confidence, determined not to let myself look like a walking disaster like the last time. Suddenly, a girl pointed at me. I gasped. Was it my dress? Or was it my shoes or was it my choice of nail polish?

"Err... May I please have your autograph?" I saw a little girl walk up to me and ask.

"Why not?" I quickly scribbled my autograph on the napkin she held out. Why in the world did she want it anyway? I asked myself. It wasn't like I was Britney Spears or someone.

"WOW! THE HOENN LEAGUE CHAMPION OF THE YEAR 2003 SIGNED MY NAPKIN!" the girl shouted. Oh yeah. That.

I continued walking to the battle area, hoping to meet some old friends there. Like maybe Ex Spike. Lisa would die to see him again after being away on research for so long. Maybe I could get his phone number for Lisa. Or maybe Roxanne or anyone for that matter- just to see anyone that wouldn't ask for my darn autograph. OR maybe there would be a good place to see a Pokemon battle, or even engage myself in one.

"Oh my! May Maple! I haven't seen you in ages!" Lisa ran up to me and hugged me tight. I was dead pleased to see her, although she just reminded me of Brendan. But who wouldn't be pleased to see their old best friend? Okay, maybe she's not so busy with research. I thought. Meanwhile, there was a chibi May in my head going "Déjà vu!" What déjà vu? I wondered.

"May?" Oh my. There he is. The prince of my heart, the one that has me charmed the one and only Hoenn league runner up- Brendan Birch. I could feel my heart skipping a beat as I saw his manly stature. He was no longer 5'9, but he was now a tall 6-footer. His eyes were still those charming peat bogs. Only when I stared into them, I didn't feel yucky and preserved, but warm and lovely. His hair was much more silver than ever. If I had had a crush on him way back then, well I don't know how to describe my feelings for him now. A year could do so much to a person. Meanwhile, my chibi form was screaming, "I told you so!!!"

"So... have you met any girls yet?" I asked nervously. Me and my damn mouth! Now my heart will have to be broken a third fucking time- talk about third time damn unlucky! Meanwhile, chibi May was screaming, "I told you so!!!" and slapping her head in frustration.

"Still single. How about you?" He asked me. Thank goodness! My heart leapt sky-high. Relief washed through my whole body and I smiled as I said, "Single and happy." Ok, maybe not so happy, but I was currently flying alongside the stars with silver wings. Still single! Whoa!

"Oh." He smiled casually, and asked, "Young lady, would you like some fruit punch?" in a jokey tone, as if he was a waiter in a posh restaurant. I laughed in spite of my self, and handed him my glass. Yet I felt my heart sinking down, down, down, like a stone. He was just using that as an excuse to get away from me, of course.

To my surprise, he returned later with a glass of rainbow-coloured fruit punch. He was about to hand it to me when...

"OH SHIT!" He slipped on a rag on the floor, and his tuxedo's pants ripped to reveal black underwear. As for the punch? It flew...

And flew...

And flew...

And landed on my head. Just perfect. My hair's now full of rainbow-swirly fruit punch. I tried rubbing some out, but it didn't work. Now everyone was staring at us, the ever-so-distinguished Hoenn League champion and runner- up, who had rainbow colors in her hair and black underpants sticking out respectively. A sight to see. Oh shit! I noticed a flash of a camera! They couldn't photograph us like this! SHIT!!!

Just as I was getting over the humiliation, Misty shouted, "Time for 7 minutes in heaven!" That was all right for her-she had a boyfriend. How about all of those poor single souls out there? However, as the chances of the bottle pointing to me were like, 200 to 1, I decided to join in. After all, a little game wouldn't hurt, and it would take everyone's minds off the scene just now, and -possibly- make everyone forget about it for life!

"Time for the first spin!" Misty said, still hyper. Pikachu came up to the bottle and gave it a spin.

It spun...

And spun...

And spun...

And pointed towards Ash, who was sitting next to Brendan. That was close, I thought. He stood up, ready to take Misty's hand for a session of passionate love...

When the bottle suddenly jerked a little to the left. It was now pointing towards Brendan. He looked around nervously, till his eyes stopped on...

Me.

Plain looking, unlucky me. Hold on a second, maybe he was looking at me with his peat-bog eyes just to torture me. Wait a minute! What if he knew that I liked him! Oh boy, oh boy, oh FUCK!

"Come on, May." He looked at me with serious eyes. Oh my... He really wanted me to join him in the cupboard!

When I'm in a crowd

Or on an island by myself

Silent or too loud

Wishing I was somewhere else

"WHAT?!" I walked to the cupboard stunned. As soon as Misty had shut the door behind us, Breadhead looked into my sapphire eyes solemnly. "Well- should we start?"

"You really want to kiss me?" I replied. This was too strange! I felt like freaking and screaming! "I thought you'd like someone... better. Like maybe the girl chasing you just now. Or maybe someone else, someone better... Whatever." I gave up trying to say anything else.

"May?"

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Never change the way you are. I love you just like that. Just shut up and kiss." And then he gave me a kiss of the French variety! What else could I do but continue? Yet I felt myself soar to the sky again, this time with golden wings instead of silver.

He had said the L word! And he had said it in a really bossy way, like- oh well. I'm beginning to sound like Mia from the Princess diaries. And although Brendan's no Michael, he's way better. Because... he's-well, Brendan.

And I can't believe

You hit me fast and hard

When you turn to me and say

Never change the way you are

I tried my best to catch his eye while kissing. Don't ask me why, it felt like the right thing to do. And I was also confused. Was it me that attracted him, or was it him that attracted me-Life is confusing.

Trying to catch your eye

Things will never look the same

Now I can't deny

You're the moth and I'm the flame

There I go again

I should walk before I run

How can I explain?

I can't stop what you've begun...

"7 minutes are up!" Misty shouted from outside the closet. About time, too. I thought. Yet those 7 minutes really had been 7 minutes in heaven, with the boy that I had a crush on? Did this mean that we were a couple? I hoped so.

"WHOA!!!!" Really perfect- I had just had 7 minutes of heaven, then life is hell again. I fell through the glass door of the closet. Luckily no one was hurt, but I did skid across the floor. Totally embarrassing! I could just see the next day's headlines- HOENN LEAGUE CHAMPION HAS A NIGHT OF HORROR!

"May?" Brendan looked up at me again, and said, "Let's continue what we did in the closet." And he pulled me into a room, and we continued kissing. Total bliss! I even forgot all the embarrassment I had gone through for the whole night!

Chorus:

I'm falling through the door

Flying cross the floor

When you look at me suddenly its clear

You're burning up my dreams

Crazy as it seems

I don't want to be anywhere but here...

"CLICK!" Oh boy. Another camera. The subtitle for the headlines will probably be: AND SHE ALSO FINDS ROMANCE IN HEAVEN! Can't the press leave me alone for a while? I mean, can you just picture it? Me and Brendan kissing, me with rainbow coloured hair and Brendan with a rip in his pants- equals to total embarrassment!

What goes on inside

Is a mystery no doubt

A roller coaster ride

I may never work it out

Here's the brand new me

Skates around and floats on air!

I'm a sight to see

Rainbow colours in my hair

You have set me free

The one who gets me there!

CHORUS

"So, May?"

"Yeah?"

"Want to go out tomorrow? Without" Brendan narrowed his eyes at the cameraman- "The press?"

"Why not?" I smiled and replied. My heart was sky-high. I was happier than I would ever be in my entire life! I felt like melting, I was so happy. I would gladly have gone through all I had already to do all of this again. With a bonus even!

Here is the place where

My head is spinning

Time is beginning

To race away

You came to throw me

Knock me off my feet

You gave me wings to fly

The world goes racing by again!

"Brendan?"

"What, Mayflower?"

"I love you, Breadhead."

END