As I finished "Another One Bites The Dust" with Vocal Adrenaline, I took one last look out toward the pathetic audience of New Directions. BIG MISTAKE. I couldn't avoid the one thing that made me weak. The one and only thing that could break my heart at that moment. Those big soft brown eyes staring at me from under those long eyelashes through that beautiful wavy dark hair.
Rachel Berry.
What I had just done hurt her so much.
It hurt me too.
It probably hurt her more than it hurt me, but that was not the point.
She trusted me. She would probably lie awake at night crying her eyes out, wondering what she did wrong. It hurt me so much more just thinking about how many nights that would happen. I didn't want to break up with her and break her heart, but now that I was back over at Vocal Adrenaline, how could we stay together? Shelby even told me to make it hard for her.
*Flashback*
"Jesse, I want you to break it off with Rachel" Shelby commanded facing away from me. "Now that she knows I am her biological mother, your job is done.
"But, Ms. Corcoran, why would you want to put your daughter through that much pain of losing the one person she thought she could depend on?" I was suddenly extremely curious.
"If she is vulnerable, they will be easier to beat at Regionals." Shelby answered in a monotone voice still looking in the opposite direction.
"But, she is your daughter…" I really did not want to break it off with Rachel, I think I loved her.
"JUST DO IT JESSE! AND MAKE IT REALLY TOUGH ON RACHEL" This was the first time I could hear the pain in her voice. It would have broken any heart.
"Okay, I'll do it." I submitted.
*Flashback Over*
Later that night, I got a visit from Rachel. She came to my house and threw tiny pebbles up to my window. I was in such a state of shock that everything hadn't set in until she had scaled the side of my house and was climbing through my window. She almost fell, but I grabbed her arm at which time, she looked up at my with those big brown eyes again. I pulled her up and in. She stumbled into my room and into my arms, making us both topple onto my bed. She started to giggle and stand up, but I held her close.
"Rachel" I whispered. "Stay with me. Just for now, don't go."
"Okay." She whispered back. Her breath smelled of peppermint patties, which made me laugh, which caused her to laugh too. Then, she asked the question I'd wanted her so badly to avoid. "So are we still…us?"
I couldn't make myself crush her heart just yet, so I lied. "Yes, of course. I will always be yours as long as you want me." I was going to have to figure out a way to let her down slowly and make her not want me instead of losing me. I loved her too much to let me hurt her.