The Magical Bat 15: Road Trip, a batman fanfic

The Magical Bat: road trip.

#include stdDisclaimer.h: Batman, Catwoman, Superman, Babs, Dick, and the others, are DC Comic's toys. Hogwarts, Albus, Minerva, the Weasleys and the others in the Potterverse belong to the fabulous JK Rowling. Arthur and the Mortons belong to GITM. DynaGlide™ and Softail™ are indicia that belong to Harley-Davidson, Inc. "Red, White, and Boom!" is an actual event sponsored by the City of Columbus, Ohio.

I'm just playing with their toys (I have my own Harley, thank you), and they'll be put back on the shelf later. Everyone else, they're mine. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead is purely coincidental.

This is a short story in the same universe as The Magic Bat, between first and second years.

For copyright and disclaimers, please see above.

Road trip
Friday, July 2, 1999:
Grandview Heights, Ohio, Morton home, 11:30

"Now remember, you're an adult, Sprink." She nodded, and Mattie pushed the doorbell.

The doorbell sounded, and Elena called, "I'll get it!" She opened the door to two young women in jeans and leather jackets, and asked, "Um, hello. Can I help you?"

"Morning, Elena. We're here for Arthur," Mattie said.

She turned and yelled "Arthur! Get down here!" She turned back to the two giggling women, asking, "Do I know you?"

"I would hope so, Elena, I threatened to lock myself in a toilet stall with you once."

Elena blinked, asking, "Mattie? You've… changed."

"A year of Wizarding School and two drops of aging potion each will do that," Mattie grinned. "This is Sprink; she's a friend from school."

"Oh, well, um, please, come in," Elena stepped back, shouting upstairs again, "Arthur! Mattie and Sprink are here!" There was an answer from upstairs, and Elena asked, "Would you like something to drink?"

"Water would be fab, luv, but can I borrow your loo?" Sprink asked, and Elena pointed, then ushered Mattie into the kitchen.

"Hello, Mrs. Morton," Mattie said politely, holding out her hand. "It's nice to see you again." The older woman blinked, and she added, "Mattie Wayne, from Gotham?"

"Oh. I'm sorry, dear. I didn't recognize you."

Mattie pulled out a zippered folder, "I'd be surprised if you did, I had two drops of aging potion, and I've got some for Arthur too." Sprink entered; Mattie adding, "Mrs. Morton, this is my friend from school, Sprink Tonks."

Elena passed out glasses of ice water, as Mrs. Morton commented; "'Sprink' is an unusual name."

"Stands for 'Susquehanna', which I think is a river somewhere over here in the Colonies, ma'am." Sprink made a face, adding, "I hate it, so I go by Sprink. My family has one of those traditions, weird names for girls. My sister's Nymphadora, she just goes by Tonks." She downed most of the glass, eyeing it, adding, "I do like Yank drinks with all the ice. Anyway, my aunts are Bellatrix and Narcissa, and Mum's Andromeda." She shrugged, asking, "What are you going to do?" She unsnapped the cuffs of her leather jacket, pulling it off and draping it over the back of her chair, then fluffing her hair out.

A younger daughter entered, and Elena said, "Sprink, this is my sister Teela; she's the 'artiste' in the family."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Teela answered. She looked; saying, "Hello, Sprink, nice to meet you. Mattie, I like your new look, it suits you. Arthur's upstairs, trying to decide what to pack."

"We're not leaving for Metropolis until early tomorrow, so he's got some time," Mattie said. "We've each got four days worth of casual clothes, underwear, socks, that kind of thing. Make sure he has a good pair of boots and gloves for riding, and his swim stuff. There's a softball game, so I'd include a glove, and I'd pack at least one nice outfit; in case we go someplace dressy for dinner, we each packed a dress and shoes." Mattie pulled off her own jacket, adding, "Does he have a good heavy jacket?"

"I think so," Teela answered, and Elena said, "I'll go see." She left, and Teela looked at the back of Mattie's leather jacket, which had an embroidered 'Gotham City Choppers' logo.

Sprink noticed, handing over her jacket; asking "What do you think about this? I think it needs something, but I'm not sure what."

"Cool logo, but it does…" Teela mused. She traced the Union Jack and the silhouette against it, then saying, "British Werewolves, Ltd. I think your wolf needs to be set against a full moon." Sprink shuddered, and Teela asked, "Are you one, and who's your tailor?"

Mattie chuckled, Sprink shooting her a dark look, saying, "That git's my tailor, and yes, I'm a werewolf." Mattie motioned for the jacket, and Sprink sighed, transforming as Mattie waved her onyx wand over the jacket; then passing it back for Teela's inspection.

Mrs. Morton blinked, asking as she chopped celery for egg salad, "I thought werewolves were dangerous?"

"On the full moon, yes, I lose my mind without the potion," Sprink said, transforming back. "That's the only time my bite's infectious, but we've got three month's supply of my potion here," she tapped the potion case. "Aside from that, I'm safe as houses."

"The full moon's not until the twenty-eighth, and we'll be back in Gotham long before then," Mattie said, asking, "Can I borrow your phone book? My bike's got a slow oil leak."

Teela passed her a pad of paper and the yellow pages, "I thought I heard a motorcycle."

"Got two, actually," Sprink said, as Teela refilled her glass from the refrigerator's tap. Sprink watched, fascinated. "I have got to take Muggle Studies," she mused.

"If the professor wasn't such an ass, according to my house mates," Arthur said, finally appearing. "Sorry, mom," He looked over, and handed her the portable, "Mattie, you can use our phone, you know." He asked, "Aging potion?"

"Yeah, two drops will kick you up to twenty or so," Sprink said, handing him a small bottle from the case. He nodded and disappeared with his bag again.

"I thought you weren't allowed to use magic until seventeen," Mrs. Morton asked.

"Ah, a bit of a loophole there," Mattie said, adding to the phone, "Service department, please." She sipped water, adding, "Yes, I have a Softail Classic with a slow oil leak, it's under warranty. Can I bring it by? Okay, I'm in Grandview, how do I get there? 70 east to 270 north to state route 16 east? You're in Pataskala, and you open at eight? I've been topping it off since I left Gotham. I don't know the VIN off hand, it's a '99 registered to Wayne, out of Gotham City. Found it? Okay, I'll see you first thing tomorrow; I'm with two friends that are on a DynaGlide with a sidecar. Thanks!"

She pressed the kill switch on the phone as she looked at Mrs. Morton; "The Department of Magic's sensors look for illegal spells and the age of the spell caster. But since Arthur and I have underage permits from the embassy, it's fine if we cast a few simple spells."

"He never mentioned that," Mrs. Morton said before adding, "I'm still not sure about this. He doesn't have experience driving, and with the terrorists at school and all."

"I understand, Mrs. Morton. I'll give Arthur some training on riding, but it's not that difficult. Sprink picked it up, and she'd never seen a motorcycle until a week ago." Mattie said, adding, "Ma'am, did Arthur tell you anything about this party, or what happened the last few weeks of term?"

"Only that it was in Metropolis, with some friends of yours, and nothing really about the end of term."

Mattie scrubbed her face, "This is a company picnic with some friends of my uncle Clark. There are people from the Daily Planet, but my dad knows a bunch of them, so we go too. One of them has a large place in south Metropolis, there's a pool, softball, a barbecue, that kind of thing. I've been there before, he's refitted the barn so people can sack out overnight, so nobody's driving drunk." She tore off a sheet from the scratch pad and doodled, asking, "Mrs. Morton, this is my cell number, and my mom's."

Mrs. Morton folded the sheet into a pocket of her apron, "What are your plans?"

Teela moved a plant out of the way as a map was unfolded on the breakfast table. "Tomorrow morning, I'll drop off my bike at the dealer; we'll go get breakfast while they're working on it. The dealer said to figure an hour or so for that. Once the leak is fixed, we go I-70 east to I-76; then follow that to Metropolis. Depending on the time, we may need to stop overnight somewhere in Pennsylvania. If we do, I'll have Arthur give you a call."

Mattie sat back, adding, "One other thing. We took the liberty of adding Arthur to your insurance policy with a motorcycle rider. That kicked your premium up 500 or so." She pulled some bills out, passing them to Mrs. Morton, "The plan is that Arthur and Sprink will trade off on the 'Glide, which has a sidecar, and is the easiest to ride. Sprink rode it up from Gotham, and she's never ridden anything but a broom before."

Teela glanced at Sprink, mouthing, 'a broom?' as Mattie continued, "We've got a driver's license, insurance and credit cards for Arthur, as we discussed in the email."

"We're taking it very easy. Any questions?"

"Can I see your wand?" Teela asked; Mattie passed it over, adding "That's worth about fifteen hundred bucks."

"Arthur's was only about a hundred," Mrs. Morton commented, adding, "Will you give us a call?"

"We'll have to stop for petrol," Sprink said. "We'll give you a call on the mobile then." She patted Mrs. Morton's hand, adding, "My mum was nervous too, but my sister went on about 'birds leaving the nest' and whatnot. We'll be fine, and we both promise that we'll nag Arthur until he gives you a ring when we stop."

Teela knocked on the door, and peeked inside. "He's decent, go on in."

"That's debatable," said Henry, who gave a wolf whistle when he saw Mattie and Sprink. "Hello, ladies, where have you been all my life?" Arthur gave him a disgusted look, and Teela giggled, "You've got a girlfriend."

"Ah, but there's so much of me to share…"

"Kinky, Henry, a cross-species three way," Mattie purred as she sat next to him, running her hand through his hair. "Homo sapiens, homo canis…" Sprink transformed, standing over him and licking his face.

Elena poked her head in, asking, "Bestiality, Henry? I never knew." Sprink woofed and wagged her tail, as Mattie gently turned his head to face her, murmuring, "…and homo vampiris. One little nibble on the neck, Henry, just one little drop of blood…"

"GAAAAAAAH!" Henry struggled free as people laughed. He stopped, watching as Sprink popped back to human form. "You're… you're a…"

"Werewolf?" Sprink sighed, "Mate, you're on top of it today," She held her hand out, "Sprink Tonks, mate to this sneaky bugger."

Mattie giggled, "C'mon, Henry, I won't bite. Seriously, don't you remember me? You won forty bucks off me at Christmas."

"Mattie? What… How?"

"Two drops of aging potion," the still twelve-year old Arthur said, waving the bottle. "That way I can ride with them over to Metropolis tomorrow."

"Ride? Ride what?"

Elena sighed, "Sorry, he's usually a lot more articulate. Normally we can't get him to shut up. Motorcycles, Henry. Y'know, Harleys?"

Henry's eyes lit up, and the girls rolled their eyes. "Yes, Henry, two Harley motorcycles in the driveway," Elena said, adding, "Honestly, a total gear head. Boys!"

"It has to be genetic," Mattie said. "Sprink, remember how Andrew got when he found out what broom I flew? My brother's the same way with his car; it has to be related to the male gene."

"I resemble that remark," Arthur said. "Henry, if you let me borrow your ball glove and some of your clothes, I'll ask Mattie if you can ride it."

Mattie snorted; Sprink saying, "Just do a resizing charm, mate."

Teela asked, "You actually ride brooms?"

"Carpets are illegal in Britain," Sprink said, and Mattie clarified, "Flying carpets, y'know, like the Arabian knights? I never understood why, they'd make more sense for families."

"What did Professor Harry call it? Protectionism for British broom manufacturers?"

"You could take the broom in the closet and make it fly?" Henry asked from the doorway.

"Flying charm's not difficult, it's getting the others all working right," Sprink said. "You've got flying, acceleration, steering, braking, and cushioning charms all to balance." She shook her head, "Easier to buy one ready-made."

After Mattie and Henry had left to look at the motorcycles, Sprink asked, "Which one of you lot is going off to Hogwarts next?"

Arthur shrugged, "Wasn't supposed to be any of us. It should have been my dad or my Uncle Rich. Magic had run alternate generations in the family for almost three hundred years."

"You can't be the only wizard in the family, mate!" She pulled out her wand, and passed it to Elena. "Go on, give it a wave." It went round the room, Teela saying, "We ought to get Julie to try." She glanced at Arthur, adding, "You were at school, she made Dad's hair grow."

"I thought he was just letting it grow out," Arthur admitted. "She's ten, wouldn't she be kind of, well, late to show her magic?"

Sprink shrugged, "It happens. Sometimes it just builds up. How long was his hair?"

Elena giggled, "Like two feet overnight from a buzz cut." At Sprink's glance, she clarified, "From about a quarter inch to two feet, and the climbing clematis bush just shot up the side of the house."

"Bill still doesn't know, does he?" Arthur asked, and Teela shook her head. "We still have over a year before he's ten and we can tell him. We had to tell Julie, though, and now we can test for it. I think they're in the back yard."

While Teela took Bill inside, Elena introduced Sprink to Julie, who made a nice little fireworks display from her wand. With a little coaching from Sprink, Julie expanded the rose bushes about four feet. With a rumble, Mattie and Henry rode up the driveway, parking behind the scarlet and gray van.

"I have got to get me one of these!" Henry exclaimed as he took his helmet off. "What do they run?"

Mattie took off her helmet, and as she shook out her hair, replied, "That ElectraGlide with the sidecar was about thirty thousand. My Softail is about twelve."

"Well gee thanks for puncturing that dream," Henry muttered.

"You asked me a question, I answered it," she replied, and Henry winced. She continued, "New Harleys start about eight thousand, although for some unknown reason they don't have a fuel gauge. You can get used bikes for less, or you can even build your own, although the suspension generally isn't as good on choppers, so you'll get rump-rot. Insurance is also higher than driving a cage," she gestured at the van, "but you don't get bugs in your teeth."

She grinned, and took the helmet from Henry, tossing it to Arthur said, "We need to get you fitted with one tomorrow. For now, try Sprink's on for size. I'm teaching you to ride."

"It's a bit loose," he admitted.

Elena giggled, saying, "I thought you had a fat head, Arthur."

"He was on the train," Sprink admitted, giggling. "He sets a bloody school record, wins the house cup for Hufflepuff, and he's still a grumpy arse!"

"I didn't win it," Arthur replied. "Mattie gave it away."

"Oh, right," Mattie said. "I thought we had this settled, Arthur. I gave those points to Susan and Ravenclaw. You won the cup fair and square for Hufflepuff."

"The end of term finally comes out!" Elena said, "C'mon, Arthur won't talk, tell us! First, what are points, and what's a house cup?"

"There are four houses at Hogwarts," Sprink started, sitting on the picnic table. "Slytherin, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Gryffindor, and first years are sorted into one of them at the Welcoming feast. Mattie an' I are in Slytherin, Arthur's in Hufflepuff." Elena nodded, and Sprink continued, "Teachers give an' take house points depending on student behavior; they count toward winning the house cup. Now, if your house has a good Quidditch team that also helps, those points go toward the Quidditch cup and the house cup."

"Ravenclaw won the Quidditch cup," Mattie added.

"Only because you weren't there!" Sprink said. "You're a great Seeker!"

"What's Quidditch?" Henry asked.

"Just the best game," Sprink enthused, and Mattie chuckled. "It's the wizarding sport. Think of a basketball game seventy feet in the air, seven players on a team, they're on brooms with four balls going at once, everything's flying about a hundred miles an hour. You remember the Cortez twins from Christmas?" Henry nodded, Mattie continued, "They play Beater for Ravenclaw, Sprink and I play for Slytherin. She's a Chaser; I'm the team's Seeker, but I missed the last two games."

"Bloody arse Fudge, threw y' in Azkaban!" Sprink grumbled.

"What's Azka… thing?" Henry asked.

Sprink looked embarrassed. Arthur finally cleared his throat, "Mattie turned out to be a political problem for Minister Fudge, so he had her charged with attempted murder and threw her in… " Mattie got up and stalked off to her bike, as Arthur quietly said, "Azkaban prison. Trust me on this one. Let it drop."

Elena walked over to where Mattie leaned against the bike, asking "Y' wanna talk about it?"

"I am so very tempted to fly to London, and turn that damned pompous ass Fudge into a rat, Elena," Mattie admitted, taking deep breaths. "Then I can watch my mother's panther have him for a light snack. What's even more infuriating is that he's done it to other people that don't have my resources. Did Arthur show you that newspaper my Aunt Lois is publishing?" Elena shook her head, and Mattie pushed off the bike, calling as she walked back to the group. "Sprink, what did you think about the present?"

"Oooh! Merlin's beard, that was good! Can I show them?" She scampered off to the sidecar where her luggage was, as Mattie said, "They don't have the First Amendment, or the Freedom of Information Act, or sunshine laws in Britain, and the Prophet newspaper is a Ministry mouthpiece. So we published an American style newspaper, without Ministry censorship, and with my aunt Lois as managing editor."

"Wait a minute," Henry said. "Aunt Lois? Is that Lois Lane of the Daily Planet, 'The Butcher of Capitol Hill'? The blood must be ankle deep!"

Mattie grinned, adding, "Oh, that's a new one, she'll like that! No, she doesn't like Minister Fudge at all."

"Merlin's mighty balls, she doesn't!" Sprink added, waving the paper. "You should have seen some of her other articles!" She passed the Reporter over, adding, "My sister's an Auror, she said you could hear Fudge yelling three floors away. 'Course, he immediately tried to stop it from publishing, they're just ignoring his ban." She giggled, adding, "Look at one o' the letters they published."

"Elizabeth Windsor?" Elena yelped. "Is that? She's a… "

"Hufflepuff, class of 1944," Mattie said. "Very nice lady, too, and she's in the same house as your brother, Elena." Her eyes glittered as she added, "Fudge declared war when he had me drugged and arrested. We'll just have to see about that."

Friday, July 2, 1999:
Columbus, Ohio, Olentangy riverbank, east side, 17:40

Mattie and Sprink maneuvered the heavy cooler along Marconi Boulevard, following the Mortons, while Henry carried little Bill. They finally put it down near the family blanket, where Sprink collapsed. Teela opened the cooler, and put some ice on Sprink's forehead, as Mattie popped open a Diet Coke. She dribbled some ice water on Sprink's face, and she sat up.

"I don't know why you wanted to wear the jacket," Teela said.

"When it rains, you'll be wet, and I'll be dry."

"Different climate than London," Elena said, passing out sandwiches. Sprink shrugged, and asked, "Where's the loo?"

"Back that way," Henry said. "Little blue plastic sheds, you can't miss them. Sorry about the smell, though." Sprink lurched off, already looking slightly green. There was a rustle of cards, and Henry looked over at Arthur shuffling. "Euchre!"

"Um, maybe I should wait for Sprink," Mattie said, looking worried. Arthur cackled.

"Okay, I'm confused," Mattie said, and Sprink snorted in agreement. "Trump is variable? So what's this hanging the dealer thing?"

"Only if trump's not chosen on the second round," Elena said. "Then the team that called trump must take at least three tricks."

"It's something like hearts, then."

"They both have tricks, yes," Teela said. "Why don't we play a round, you two can watch, and then," she waggled her eyebrows, "we'll deal you in."

"Why do I think I'm going to be skinned?" Mattie asked the sky. She popped open a Diet Coke, adding, "I'm game."

"Y'know, Mattie, I don't really know all that much about you," Elena said. She waggled her eyebrows, "As your partner, I should."

"Fire away, but I won't answer anything sensitive," Mattie said. "What's trump?"

"Clubs," Elena picked up her hand. "Let's see. Something you're proud of that nobody knows."

"Um, okay. Two years ago, I came in second in the parish troop's cookie sales."

"Cookie sales? But your dad's…"

"Yeah, yeah," She waved her hand, "They only bought one box of peanut butter cookies, though, for three bucks. I had to work my butt off; he wouldn't even take in a sign-up sheet to work." She looked at the Morton girls, "What? Does the thought of me standing outside a 7-11 in a Girl Scout uniform seem weird? You've done it." She shivered, "Drafty damn uniforms for February."

"It does seem kinda weird," Teela offered as she led the ace of diamonds.

"No, I can see the logic," Mattie said while following suit. "Too many of my classmates at my former boarding school had rich parents, they were spoiled because they got everything on a silver platter." Sprink winced, Mattie added, "Sorry. My parents believe in my working for what I get. For instance, they set me up with a brokerage account when I was five. They started me out with ten thousand, and that was it. Any gains or losses were mine, at one point it was down to 225 dollars. Before I went off to Hogwarts, I moved everything into a nice, boring, conservative money market fund."

"I noticed you read the financial section every day at school," Sprink said, ditching the nine. "I think you were the only one in the house that did."

"Graham Pritchard did too. You people would argue about Quidditch teams, we would argue about which team had better financials. One reason I bought a controlling interest in Ballycastle." She grinned, adding, "My very own professional Quidditch team. Well, Graham has a minority stake, too. Maybe we should change the team colors to green and silver. What about you, Sprink, anything you'd care to share with us?"

"Um, well, your sister, Julia?" Teela nodded, "I recognized that she was a late bloomer because I was too." Sprink blushed, "I was eight, and visiting aunt 'Cissa's manor, and Cousin Draco and I were chasing each other through the vineyards. He would'a been a fourth year at the time. Anyway, my sister and I have always been, well, kinda clumsy." She grinned, "I somehow stabbed the back of my head on one of the thorns, and, well, my magic finally manifested." She blushed, adding, "Just before harvest, and I set the vines on fire."

Elena trumped her sister's ace, lead the jack of clubs and motioned for Sprink to continue. "Those vines were like nine hundred years old. They were prime winery grapes, worth a fortune, and I burnt them to ash. Uncle Lucius was sooo mad, he almost Crucio'd me right there."

"What's crucio?" Elena asked.

"One of the three Unforgivable curses," Arthur said; fishing out a Coke from the cooler Teela leaned against. He waved it in the air, and Mattie held up her Diet. He pulled one out, adding, "It causes horrible pain. Professor Potter demonstrated it on a rat last year." He shuddered; then went back to his own game with his parents and Henry.

BOOM PWEEEEE "Ooh, nice Catherine wheel!"

"There's something about fireworks."

"You think this is loud, wait until the finale."

Saturday, July 3, 1999:
Pataskala, Ohio, 07:57

Mattie cut her motorcycle's engine; then looked at Sprink. "You know, I just realized that I won't fit in that sidecar with Arthur."

"It would be tight," he agreed. "If I remember right, there's a McDonald's a couple of miles ahead. We can ride up there and bring back breakfast. Do you have any preferences?"

"Um, a sausage egg biscuit meal with a jumbo coffee," Mattie asked. "When you get back, we can get Arthur outfitted with a proper helmet," she grinned, "Instead of his brother's football helmet."

With a rattle of chain, the service bay door rolled up, and Mattie called, "See you in twenty minutes or so!"

Sprink looked up from USA Today, commenting, "Are all your newspapers like The Reporter? They certainly don't mind having at the politicians, do they?"

"Aunt Lois is a bit more bloodthirsty, but I think that just makes her a better reporter," Mattie said from the financial section of the Dispatch. She jotted down some numbers on a small pad, then stowed it in her waist pack.

Arthur took a gulp of Coke, adding, "Politicians like Fudge don't last too long. Reporters know they can print what they want, but they've got to be able to prove it."

"With public figures like my Mom and Dad, they'll usually strike a deal; the press can have at them, as long as they leave their kids alone," Mattie said. "Now, if the kids screw up, the deal's off. There's a politician in Texas whose twin daughters are underage drunks, they have absolutely no privacy." She refolded the section neatly, stacking it and opening the local section as Arthur turned to the editorial page.

"Ms. Wayne?" the service manager asked. "You're all set, repaired under warranty. Please go by the service window for your invoice and keys."

Saturday, July 3, 1999:
Greensburg, Pennsylvania, I-70 BP, 15:45

"Gor Blimey, you'd think a British Petrol station would at least hire Brits," Sprink complained. "Their loo stank, too." She took a look, and asked, "Is that normal, mate?"

"No," Mattie answered. "Follow my lead," She called, "Hey, Arthur, how are things going?"

"Fine, Mattie," he said as he eyed the large biker near him. Mattie smiled at him, pulling her Gotham jacket on, while Sprink pulled hers on.

"Sorry to take up both pumps, guys, but you know how girls are in the pot," Mattie said. "Hey, you know a guy named 'Drongo' in Gotham?" One of them grunted, while Mattie added, "I owe him fifty bucks for my bar tab. If you're going that way, could you give it to him?" She passed him three folded bills, mounting her bike while Arthur capped the Electra Glide's tank. He thumbed the starter, and took off with Sprink in the sidecar while Mattie waved and followed them.

"So who's Drongo, and what's a 'Hell's Angel'?" Sprink asked as they pulled into a 7-11 a few miles down the road.

"Drongo's nobody, but the Angels are one of the meaner gangs around," Mattie said. "I didn't want to start a fight when I can buy them off with sixty bucks worth of beer. Anyone need to pee? These places are usually cleaner." Arthur walked into the store, while Mattie said, "Mrs. Morton doesn't need to know about this, does she?" Sprink shook her head, following Arthur as Mattie pulled out her cell phone.

"Mrs. Morton? Mattie Wayne. No, we haven't had any problems so far. We're at a 7-11 outside Greensburg, southeast of Pittsburgh. Arthur's inside, using the head. No, I thought we'd push on to Harrisburg while there's light; then find a hotel, there's probably a better selection there. I'll shoot for a three star or better, like a Hilton, we're all a bit stiff, I'd love a hot tub. No, I promise no beer, sodas only. I think we'll go another couple of hours. Yes, separate rooms, Sprink and I will share. Right, we'll make sure he calls after we've checked in. You want us to call tomorrow morning before we leave? It will be somewhat early. Ok. Yes, ma'am, right, goodnight."

Mattie looked up, and Arthur was looking a little sour, "I don't like lying to my parents."

"We're not," Mattie said, "There was nothing that happened. No injuries, no magic, no damage, nothing to tell them." She put her sunglasses on, adding, "Just like you didn't tell them about my ring, or where I spent a month. I doubt your brothers and sisters tell them everything."

Sprink bounced out, saying, "Sorry, mates, I just have no capacity. What's the plan?"

Mattie laid out the map on the hood of the sidecar, saying, "We're here. We follow I-76 for another two and a half hours or so, until we're outside Harrisburg, then we'll find a hotel for the night, a Hilton if possible. We get two connecting rooms, and while we're cleaning up and changing for dinner, you, Mr. Morton will call your mother. I promised her we'd nag you until you did." She stretched, adding, "I want a hot tub. Tomorrow, bright and early, we go down for breakfast, call Columbus again, and push on for Metropolis."

Saturday, July 3, 1999:
West Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, I-76, 18:55

Mattie signaled at exit 17, pointing at the Hampton Inn sign, and Sprink flashed her lights, following her to park. She stretched, undoing a saddlebag and enlarging a duffle bag as the others followed her in. Smiling at the desk clerk, she offered her credit card, asking, "I'd like two double rooms, non-smoking, connecting if possible."

"Ooh, this is nice," Sprink said, bouncing on her bed. "I think this bed is better than my four-poster at school. It's bigger, at least."

"It's probably only a year or two old, unlike the four posters, which are ancient," Mattie agreed. "It's too bad we can't see the river from here. Sorry." She knocked on the connecting door, asking, "Arthur?" while Sprink figured out the latch to the balcony. "Be careful, Sprink."

"What river? Maybe he's in the loo," Sprink said. "Oy, all that water, 'scuse me!" and dashed into the bathroom herself.

Leaving the connecting door open, Mattie walked out on the balcony, admiring the pool. She knocked on the bathroom door, calling, "The Susquehanna river. Get your shower; I'll toss your bag in there." She did so; then picked up her cell phone to call home.

Sunday, July 4, 1999:
West Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, 06:45

"Checking out, please, rooms 1704 and 1706," Mattie said, offering the fellow her AMEX card. She glanced over the bill, asking, "Excuse me. Weren't there two calls to Columbus? One last night and one this morning?"

"I just show the one last night from 1706, ma'am," the clerk said. "Sign here, please."

"Thank you," she told the clerk, while passing Arthur her cell phone with a glower. "ET, phone home."

"Thank you, ma'am, I hope you had a wonderful stay."

"We did, pity about the whirlpool, though."

"I am sorry, ma'am. Plumbing problems happen. Let me offer you a coupon for a free night, for your future use."

"Good in London? I travel there quite often."

"Double suite in London, yes, ma'am." The clerk initialed the coupon and stamped it with a smile.

Sunday, July 4, 1999:
Southeast Metropolis, Steelton farms, 09:55

Braking the motorcycle to an idle on the gravel path, Mattie told the scanner, "Helena Martha Wayne with two guests, Arthur Morton and Susquehanna Tonks." It beeped; she offered her finger for a blood and DNA check while accepting a retinal scan. The scanner flashed green, and she moved away, calling, "State your name, let it scan your retina and give it a blood sample. Don't screw with this; we're targeted by military grade lasers now."

"What's a laser?" Sprink asked.

"A really powerful killing curse," Arthur answered as the sensor flashed green, and he stepped away. Sprink took his place, going 'Ow!' at the finger prick. She got a green light, a hidden speaker said, "Three authorized access."

"What would have happened if we hadn't passed?"

"You really want to know?" Mattie asked as she dropped the bike into gear again.

A flesh-colored six foot beach ball wearing a tiny red swimsuit and wrap-around sunglasses came bouncing up, shouted, "Mattie!" and enfolded her. She coughed; swatting him, saying "Uncle Eel, how many have you had?"

"Just a few."

"A few whiskeys?" Shaking her head, she said, "Eel, these are my friends, Arthur and Sprink. This drunken beach-ball is also known as Plastic Man." She swatted him, telling Eel, "Now behave and go float in the pool. I've got some putty for you…"

"Putty! Putty!" He bounced away, and Mattie shook her head, "He's addicted to Silly Putty. We can change to our swim stuff over there. Sprink, if you want to change to your wolf form, you'll fit right in." She pulled her leather jacket and helmet off; stretching, "You can leave your stuff here, and nobody's going to bother it. Arthur, are we on for that bet?"

Mattie relaxed in a black bikini, and sipped her Diet Coke. "Okay, let's see what information you've pried out of Elena, Arthur. Who's the hero, and who's the relative?" Sprink barked as she paddled around the pool, kids squirting her with water guns.

"Um, okay. I know Jade is one, and she's over there, the short brunette next to the grill, right?" Mattie nodded, and Arthur continued, "What about your aunt Lois, is she a hero?"

"A hero? That's debatable, Arthur, debatable," Babs said as she joined them. "Does she put on spandex? No, sorry," Mattie cackled, and he glowered at her. Babs asked, "Have you told him about the rules, Mattie?"

"Yeah, and he's even worn my little toy for twenty minutes or so," Mattie said. "Remind me to kick Dick's butt for that idea. I've told the ring he's my backup, just in case."

"Okay. For the extra point, Arthur, what's their name?"

"Um, Jade is, um, Jennie something, and Green Lantern is Kyle, I think. He's … I don't see him." Arthur looked around, "Oh, one guy I see. Isn't Aquaman the big blond fellow in the pool, drinking a Budweiser?"

"Yep, who else?" Barbara asked.

Mattie chortled and sat up. "Want some help, Arthur? Remember those people I mentioned on the train? Well, aside from Potter, you've gotten one of them. Can you pick out Flash or Superman? What about Wondy?"

"Well, pictures I've seen of her are dark hair, and really big…um…"

"Breasts, Arthur. Also known as boobs," Babs said. "They're real, and she's in sight." She glanced at Mattie, asking, "What'd you tell him about her?"

"Job and handwriting," Babs snickered, "For the perfect Amazon princess… You find her yet, Arthur?"

"Most of the people here have dark hair," he muttered. "Isn't she over next to the picnic table, where the salads are? The woman wearing a blue one-piece with a white cover? I don't think she's tall enough for Barda."

"Bingo," Babs said. "She's a vegetarian, with super hearing, by the way. Do not get her started by coming close to asking her opinion on anything; she'll go on for hours and hours."

"She's more boring than Binns, and he's dead. I'd hate to have her as a history teacher," Mattie admitted. "Want to try for Flash?" She looked around, then said, "He's not in sight, sorry, how about Supes?"

"Flash's identity is public, so he won't count. But Superman's a really big guy, but a lot of the men here are," Arthur mused. He looked around; asking, "He's in sight?" Barbara perked up to look around; then nodded. "Hmm. Mattie, is that your mom in the purple talking to that blonde? Over near the beer tap?"

Mattie craned to look, saying, "Yep. Who's she talking to? Find Supes yet? C'mon, Arthur, you've met him!"

"Hmm… Na, it can't be. The guy in the blue trunks with a glass of… milk?" He looked at Mattie, asking, "That's your uncle Clark!"

"Give the man a cee-gar!" Babs said, while Arthur blinked in disbelief. "How many current members of the JLA can you spot, Arthur? We'll skip Flash and Lantern; they're inside watching the tube. That leaves the Manhunter, Bats, and Oracle."

"Ten bucks says he won't get Oracle," Dick said as he joined them. He pulled over a deck chair, offering Babs a Diet Coke.

"Done, brother mine, and remind me to kick your butt later."

"Certainly, little sis, should be fun. Hello, Arthur, it's good to see you again. J'onn isn't disguised, but he doesn't like sun; he burns easily."

"Refill, back in a minute," Mattie said, getting up. "Arthur, you want another Coke?"

"Yes, thank you," he continued to scan, asking, "With the big floppy hat, under the umbrella near the diving board?"

"Slathering sunscreen on? Yep. Can you tell me who Selina's talking to, the blonde?" Dick asked. "She doesn't wear a mask, and… I can see another witch here, and you've still got Bats and Oracle to figure out."

"Geez, the blonde is Black Canary?" Babs nodded, and Arthur looked around. Mattie bounced once on the diving board, called, "Yee-Hah!" and cannonballed into the pool, soaking J'onn and a woman wearing a white one-piece, who shrieked.

"Get wet, Zee!" someone shouted; she shouted, "My hair! Wayne, I'm gonna kill you!"

"Get in line, Aunt Zee!" Mattie called back, dripping as she got out. She walked over to the cooler, extracting two Diets and a Classic Coke, and offering a Diet to Zatanna, who accepted. She walked over with Mattie, as Mattie gave Arthur his Coke, saying, "Aunt Zee, this is Arthur, one of my school mates, and the mangy mutt trying to sneak up behind you is my housemate Sprink."

Zatanna turned, and said, "Hello, Sprink. Werewolf, or animagus?"

Sprink shook down, then transformed, saying, "Werewolf. You're not scared?"

Zee shrugged. "Full moon's not for three weeks. Doing the guessing game, I see, and what's going to happen with Fudge now that he's managed to piss off both Bats and Supes?"

"How'd you know about Fudge?" Sprink asked.

"Dear, I do keep track of news." Zee shrugged, "It won't be the first government your father overthrew, Mattie, dear."

"Oh, shit!" Arthur said, "Your father's the BAT, Mattie?"

She shrugged, and Dick threw his arm over Arthur's shoulders, saying, "Remember, no talkee, Mr. Morton."

Arthur glanced at him, then shrugged Dick's arm off. "That explains SO much. Mattie said that she grew up in it, but I kept thinking it was because your mom was Catwoman." He mused, glancing at Dick, "... that makes you Nightwing who was going out with ..." Arthur glanced at Babs. "Red hair, small waist… you were the first Batgirl. But who's Oracle?"

"That is something that most of the JLA would like to know, Arthur," Zee said. "All we see is a computer-generated mask at meetings. The Clan knows, but they're not talking, unless the Bat authorizes it."

"Need to know, Zee." Dick said with a smile.

"But Mattie, Bat… your dad, he seemed like such a nice guy at Christmas," Arthur mused.

Dick chuckled, pulling off his shirt to show a mass of scars. "You ought to see Bruce's." He flipped the shirt on his back, adding, "You have to understand that it's a dangerous world we live in, Arthur, where we have to be prepared to take any one person or group out at any time."

"The Bat has protocols to take every one of us out, at any time," Zatanna said.

"That includes family," Dick said with a smile. "Naturally, I have my own plans to take him and everyone else out if necessary, as both Mattie and Babs do." They nodded, looking at Arthur and Sprink.

"Good, you're all paranoid," Arthur muttered, and Barbara smiled. "Unfortunately, it's necessary, Arthur. You don't like to think of fighting a relative or friend of yours, but there are too many cases of someone being controlled that it's necessary to have those plans."

"Think of it this way, Arthur," Mattie said. "If someone were to put me under Imperious and had me flinging AK's around, with my combination of magic and the martial arts, someone here would have to stop me. How would you or Sprink do it? I'm sure that Dick and Babs have something figured out (they nodded), but that's a two-edged sword, it's a weakness I also have to figure out, because I'm vulnerable in a fight that way if I'm not under Imperious."

"And there, Mr. Morton is why the Bats are the masters of cunning, stealth, and double, triple, and quadruple-think." Zatanna said. "This is why the Bat has stayed on the JLA for these many years, despite not having a power of some sort. Not only does he remind us of who we are, but who we protect. It is unusual for a Bat to have any sort of power; Mattie will definitely be a force to be reckoned with in a few years. I can easily see her taking her father's place."

"Wayne, it is your … destiny." Mattie said, in a spooky voice, while Dick and Babs laughed, and Sprink looked puzzled. Arthur and Zatanna shared a look, and didn't.

Steel whistled from the grill, calling "Softball time! Line 'em up! Will the boys finally be able to beat the girls? Loser buys the drinks, remember the big rule!"

"No powers!" people yelled, and Mattie stood, pulling the others to their feet, as Sprink asked, "What do they mean?"

"You can't use magic, dear, and for you, I'd stay in one form for the entire game," Zatanna said.

"Leave your wands here, guys. I don't want to fall and break mine, it's too bloody expensive," Mattie said.

"Good idea, dear," Zee said as she drew hers. Dick pulled Arthur with him toward third base, while the girls collected near first.

"What about people like Superman," Arthur asked Dick as they walked, "Does he sit out?"

Dick shook his head, "He could bounce the ball off Pluto, but he holds himself down to normal strength, like Wondy does. You've played softball before, right?"

Arthur nodded, "Yeah, but my brother's the jock."

"Don't worry about it, Arthur. You'll do fine," Clark said, clapping him on the back.

Arthur's jaw gaped, saying, "If you think so, Mr. Sup…"

"Ah, ah, I'm just Mattie's Uncle Clark now."

"Like I'm her father," Bruce growled, and Dick said, "Enough, Bruce. He's a good kid, relax and think about how we're going to kick the women's butts for a change."

"With Selina as their captain, we might as well cash it in now," Kyle said, and burped, swigging another Budweiser.

"Lois did a good job last year," Clark said. "I was very proud of her, but she was insufferable for weeks. I'm catching again, I suppose?"

Bruce nodded, "Arthur, J'onn and I pitching again?" Aquaman chuckled, and said, "I think he meant me, Arthur. Should I go by Orin?"

Clark nodded. "I think Dick at first, Kyle at second, Arthur, you can do short, and Wally at third. Remember the penalty for accidental use of powers, one free base to the other side at their discretion," and Arthur winced. "Let's play ball!"

The women had won the toss, John and Natasha Irons electing to sit this one out to finish getting the food ready, while Eel had taken the job as both Home Plate and (drunken) umpire. He called; "Play (hic) ball!" and Orin fired the first pitch at Lois, who replied with a long fly that just curved foul.

"Ooh, I got it, I got it!" Sprink scrambled after the ball, and with a lunge, her jaws snapped shut on it as she tumbled to the grass. Dinah groaned, and Sprink stood up, asking, "What?"

"It's a foul, ya mangy mutt," Mattie said with a smile from second, tossing the ball to Dinah at third, and folding Sprink into a hug. "No powers, remember? If they score two more runs they win, and they can use that foul to force those runs." She hugged Sprink again, and said, "Hey, top of the seventh, beer and loo break is coming up shortly. Don't worry about it, you're doing fine."

Dinah said, "Don't worry, kid, we know it's your first time. Let's just try to get Dick out, which will trap Wally on first."

"Hey, batter, batter, batter! Hey, batter, batter, batter!" Lois called from first, as Dick swung, hitting a grounder to second. Mattie grabbed it, touched second to force Wally out; tossing it to Diana at home, barely beating out Arthur as he tried to score. Eel called 'Out!" and the girls screamed, dancing and hugging themselves.

Clark called, "Ahem! Ladies and gentlemen?" He walked over to Selina on the pitcher's mound, bowing low and asking, "Your pleasure, ma'am?"

"A bottle of your finest milk, kind sir."

"My pleasure, ma'am," He seemed to shimmer in the air, presenting her with a pint bottle, saying, "Fresh from the dairy in Kansas, milady."

"Puurfect. Thank you, kind sir, the wager is discharged."

"Until next year, milady," Clark bowed low, and backed away for a few yards, then he stood and laughed, before walking over to Arthur, clapping him on the back.

"C'mon, Sprink," Mattie said, "Now we shower off the sweat, grab a plate and EAT!"

"What's the matter, Arthur?" Mattie asked as she sat on the edge of the pool, kicking her feet in the water. With a pop, she opened her Diet Coke.

"Hey, you did great!" Sprink said, plopping down on his other side. She sniffed the grilled ear of corn; taking a bite, "I'm the one that fouled."

"Strip the yellow corn off the cob, don't eat the cob itself," Lois said, sitting on her other side. "Arthur, you did great, not even Mickey Mantle scored in every game. As for you, young lady," Lois said, tapping Sprink on the shoulder, "I would be surprised if a British witch had ever played softball before. You did fine, after all, I still haven't figured out cricket."

"Mattie?" Sprink whispered.

"Yeah, Sprink?"

"I did good?"

"You did real good; mate. Go to sleep."

Monday, July 5, 1999:
Southeast Metropolis, Steelton farms, 06:00

"Come an' git it, 'for ah slop it to the hawgs!" someone called, and people groaned. Mattie grinned to herself, and said loudly, "Get up, you lazy sots! I've been up since three, I ran fifteen miles, milked the hogs, slopped the cows, and fought off a Klingon invasion fleet single-handedly!"

"Bully for you," someone mumbled, while another said, "Kill the Baby Bat, then we can go back to sleep." A third mumbled, "Nuke her from orbit, only way to be sure."

"Na, they've got a protocol for that, I'm sure," Jennie yawned from her bunk. "We'd just be kicking our own ass. God, I hate morning people."

"There's no invasion fleet, is there?" Sprink whispered, and Mattie shook her head, whispering. "Clark got some morning tea from London. Go downstairs and have your morning cuppa with the Princess." Clearing her throat, she said, "It's just too bad, then. I'll have to pour all this lovely, fresh coffee down the drain. Pity, really. It smells sooo good."

"Then again, we can always nuke her later, after coffee."

"And eggs, and sausage, and lots and lots of bacon that's downstairs, and even more coffee."

"Senor Juan Valdez has spared your life, Wayne. See ya downstairs."

Monday, July 5, 1999:
Southeast Metropolis, Steelton farms, 08:05

"Thank you, Mr. Irons. We had a great time."

John Henry gave her a quick hug, and said, "Drive safely, now."

"We will, sir," Mattie said, looking at Arthur, sitting half-asleep in the sidecar. Spreading out the map, she traced the route with Sprink, "We follow this around, until we get back on I-70, and just stay on that all the way to Columbus. How's your petrol?"

"'Bout half tank, I suppose."

"Once we get on 70, you want to take the lead, and when you get down to a quarter, pull off at a 7-11, we'll get gas and hit the loo."

"Works for me, mate."

Monday, July 5, 1999:
Southern Pennsylvania, 10:33

With a beep, Mattie shot past Sprink, pulling over to the side of the road. "Wrong turn, mate, we're on 99, we should be on 76."

"Oops."

"No worries, we're seeing the country. Much better than flooing, all we need to do is go to the next exit, get off and head back south, and get on 76 there," Mattie showed on the map.

A Pennsylvania Highway Patrol motorcycle had pulled up behind them, the officer dismounting. "Morning, Officer," Mattie called. "Is there a problem?"

"Your tail light's out on the sidecar. I need to see the license, registration and insurance for both of you ladies, please."

"Certainly," Mattie dug it out of her pack, handing it to the officer; then waking Arthur, telling him, "License for the officer, Arthur."

"Um, I'm confused, mate," Sprink told the cop. "Which of these do you need?" she asked, holding them all out. He grinned, plucking the insurance and international license out, comparing them to her passport, which he gave back. "Your buddy has the registration for this one. Stay right there; don't go anywhere while I call you in." Mattie walked over to lean against the ElectraGlide, saying quietly, "Stay calm, we're fine."

A few minutes later, the cop came back, handing back their ID. "You're good, although I'd get that broken taillight that I don't see fixed. Why'd you stop?"

"We missed the turn onto 76 from 70, we were going to go up an exit and come back down," Mattie said. "Thanks for telling me about it, I've got some spare parts to fix it now, or do you think we can wait until Columbus to get that non-broken light fixed?"

"Long as it's un-broken by tonight; that turn is a tricky one if you're not used to it. Nice bikes, by the way. Remember your helmets, and have a nice day!" He roared off, and Mattie said, "That's the way law enforcement should be. Want me to lead?"

Monday, July 5, 1999:
Wheeling, West Virginia, 13:03

Mattie pulled into a 7-11, and shut off her engine, followed by Sprink. All three stretched, Arthur pointing across the street, asking, "Anyone else hungry?"

"I could use a choke and puke," Mattie said. "You two go pee, I'll fill these up, then we'll mosey on over."

"Mosey? Choke and puke? Sounds like Potions class," Sprink said, Arthur tugging her sleeve with a laugh, saying, "How do I explain 'Smokey and the Bandit?"

Monday, July 5, 1999:
Grandview Heights, Ohio, Goodale Park, 16:47

"Why are we stopping?" Mattie asked.

Arthur took off his helmet, "Because I can't go home ten years older than I left. We snuck out before my brother Bill woke up, he doesn't know I'm a wizard, remember? Give me the youth potion, and I'll resize my clothes. Then we can go home and eat some real food."

Sprink's ears pricked up, "Real food?" she asked interestedly.

Monday, July 5, 1999:
Grandview Heights, Ohio, Morton home, 17:13

"We're hooome!"

"Arthur! How are you! I've been worried sick!"

"We're fine, Mom," but they were hustled into the kitchen, where they were sat down, and Momma Morton ordered them to 'Tell All!'

"Does that include me, finally?" little Bill asked.

"What do you mean?" Elena asked.

"I'm eight, not stupid," he said. "First, we suddenly have owls coming and landing in a newly built hutch, with bits of paper tied to their feet. My bedroom is right above it, I can see them plain as day. Then we have you," Bill pointed to Mattie, "who at Christmas was ten, and is now, seven months later, twenty years old. In addition, my brother received a sealed envelope by owl yesterday."

"Your marks!" Sprink exclaimed.

"Overnight, the rose bushes in the back yard grow four feet, and my brother, has a mysterious school trunk with a very odd lock. A lock that's easy to accidentally leave open, exposing some very peculiar textbooks and school supplies. Now, are you going to tell me what's really going on, or should I guess?"

"Um…" People glanced at each other; then Arthur scooted his chair near Bill's, and said, "Here's the deal, Bill. This is something you have to keep secret." Bill nodded, Arthur continuing, "I'm a wizard, and we think Julie is a witch. The magic seems to have skipped Dad's generation. You remember all the weird stories about Great Grandpa Edmond?" Bill nodded, "He was a wizard. Mattie and Sprink are my schoolmates at Hogwarts; they're witches." Mattie slid her wand over to Bill, who eyed it.

"If nothing happens when you wave it, it doesn't mean you don't have magic," Elena said. "We seem to be late bloomers; Julie just did her first magic." She glanced at her younger sister, adding with a grin, "That doesn't mean I'm not jealous, though," as she ruffled her hair.

"Most wizards do it by three or four, like my sister," Sprink said. "Mine finally came in when I was eight." She nudged the onyx wand on the white tabletop. Bill looked at it like it was a rattlesnake, asking, "What about the aging bit?"

"Potion," Arthur said. "Two drops, I couldn't go to the picnic with Mattie's extended family as a twelve-year-old and ride a motorcycle, could I?"

Bill grunted, then "Where'd you get it?" Arthur cocked an eyebrow at Mattie, who answered, "Potion Mistress I know in London, same place as Sprink's potion." Bill looked at Sprink, who sighed, and with a pop changed to a wolf, then back again.

Looking around, Bill shrugged, picked up the wand, and gave it a corkscrew wave.