Okay, I've decided to redo this, being that I have, ahem. This needs a proper announcement. PEOPLE OF FANFICTION! KELLYCLARKSTONGIRL HAS OFFICIALLY SWITCHED FANDOMS. GOODBYE 1/5! HELLO... DUN DUN DUN! 2X5!

Still don't own anything, just a little change in plot!

Hey. My name is Hoagie. And I am a fifth wheel. I have auburn hair and eyes that really don't have a color. It depends on what I'm wearing, the time of day, and how bright it is, but they're usually hidden behind flight goggles. To understand what I mean by being "a fifth wheel", you'd have to meet my friends.

First, there's Kuki Sanban. She was born in Tokyo, Japan, and moved here when she was 5 years old. If she could do only one thing a day, that thing would be flirting with some random guy just to make him feel good. She has black hair and violet eyes, the perfect Japanese girl. She can do calligraphy, origami, make great food, anything.

Then, there's Wallabee "Wally" Beatles. He was born in Sydney, Australia, so he's got that accent that girls always fall for, lucky. He's got blonde hair, green eyes. He is the quarter-back-of-the-year-heart-throb-catfight-starter-I'm-a-bad-boy of our little group. He has a bad boy image to keep up, yet he still hangs with us. I personally think Kuki has something to do with it, though.

Nigel, the leader. He was born in London, England, and has the perfect accent to match. He is bald, don't ask me why, but I think it would be brown if he grew it out, and blue eyes. He's the "I get good grades but I can still be cool at the same time" kind of guy.

Lizzie, the (shudder) "leaders girlfriend". She was born here, raised here, and learned her manners here, that's for sure. She's been with Nigel, or "Nigie" as she likes to call him, since anyone can remember. She swears that she used a "boyfriend helmet" on him once, but no one really believes her. If she could do one thing for a day, it would be… hanging on to Nigel until his arm falls off. Enough said.

Abby, the cool girl. She was born in Paris, France, but she's got no accent. She could easily get better friends than us, but yet she stays. Again, I think Nigel has something to do with it, though she isn't exactly "with him" yet. But that's a yet. She has black hair and blue eyes. She's not a snobby kind of cool person. More of a "Hey, I've got extra cash. WHO WANTS IT?" kind of cool person.

You see, if my friends and I had a TV show, Kuki and Wally would be the people that everyone knows they like each other, but them. Wally just tries to hide it. "My comics are in her room!" "She had something on her face, so I couldn't help but stare!" "She had a smudge of ink on her hand, so I wiped it off!" and things like that. Kuki is the flirt of the group, so Wally thinks he is like every other guy is to her. But little does he know "Hiiiiiiieeeee, Wally!" "Whatcha doin'?" and "How's life treatin' ya?" meant more towards him than to anyone else.

In that TV show of our life, Nigel and Abby would be the couple everyone wants to get together, but they won't until the series finale. Their friendship is so strong that many people mistake them for boyfriend and girlfriend, even thought Nigel has Lizzie. He claims he loves her, but when you can have Abby, anything can ch—never mind.

Then, there's me. I'm the one who only a… "select few" of fans would want to end up with… ugh. I can't say it. She's so beautiful, so cool. Exactly why she wouldn't want to be with a dork like me. Yeah, I'm not that fat anymore, but I'm not athletic or smart, or anything that someone like her would like.

That is why I never exactly "hang out" with them outside of school. Yeah, me and the guys do sometimes, but I can't ever be with the girls, or with the guys WITH their girls. Usually, people say "Hey, have you seen Kuki, Wally, Lizzie, Nigel, and Lizzie?" No Hoagie. I'm never there. Don't have the nerve. I'm a fifth wheel, and always will be.

Man, if only I could be more like…

WHO DOES HE WANT TO BE LIKE? Well, I'm not telling... yet! You have probably already guessed, but if you haven't... have patience young Padawan, you will soon know what I do. NEXT CHAPPY COMING SOON! I hope.