I always wanted to get up and walk away from life, just float up into the air like the wind: like nothingness. All those past hours spent dreaming of somewhere better, of somewhere I could be everything and nothing at once, like a spirit I would be free.

But I was loved at home, at all my homes. In District 12 I had Lady, and Rory and Buttercup; sometimes I even had mother. In District 13 I still had Buttercup but I didn't know many people so I devoted myself to my work and didn't have time to dream anymore. My sleep was still too filled with nightmares.

I still remember that 3 year old I had to treat in District 12, she was freezing to death and wouldn't let go of my hand or stop telling me how scared she was. In some ways I thought she was wrong, if she never lived she would never have to know the pain of life. I have wanted to leave so badly throughout my entire life that I barely got to see its joys.

But now I don't want to leave.

Please let me stay.

Please, please. I want to stay with Katniss.