Breaking the Rules
By Kimmy
Lily Evans found herself staring at him more than usual suddenly. She found herself admiring the way his hair resisted everything done to it and the way his beautiful hazel eyes would sparkle every time he held a broom in his hand. Out of the blue, all she wanted was to be the one hanging on his arm and the one his arms would embrace everyday. She wanted to be able to be one of those girls throwing themselves at him after he pulled a fantastic save and the only one he would care to notice. Lily wanted to be able to love him freely. Without any restraint, without any limits. Without any rules. But that was the problem. Loving James Potter was breaking the rules. All of the rules. It went against everything she believed in, every single thing she had taught herself to obey. Her heart and her mind - both formidable forces - were suddenly pitted against one another, and it threatened to overcome her.
Her mind told her to stay strong, stay on the path that she had made for herself and give up love altogether. Her heart, however, told her to give up everything that had seemed to make sense and risk it all for ultimate happiness in the arms of James Potter.
That's what she was trying to decide in class that day. It was Charms. James' worst subject. She watched him from her table after finishing the task assigned as he furrowed his brow in concentration. He waved his wand once, twice, three times, his mouth muttering the incantation. A few sparks flew from the wand's tip, but other than that, nothing happened. The flower bud that was supposed to bloom after the charm had been acted out stayed just that. A white bud on a green stem. The seventeen-year-old Headboy scowled at the plant.
Lily found it adorable. Not that she wanted to. She would have given anything to stop herself from feeling so, anything to hate him again. She swallowed hard as she watched James try again. The most stubborn boy I have ever met, she mused. She recalls the many times she had denied him and the many times he came back for more. He had stopped, however, after sixth year. It seemed he had grown accustomed to the fact that she would always refuse and had just given up. Lily was thankful, but not for the reasons anyone would think. If he had not stopped, Lily wasn't quite sure she would be able to resist if he asked.
After another fruitless try, the boy put his hands to his forehead and stared hard at the bud as though trying to convince it to bloom. After a few moments of conversing with the unresponsive flower bud, he gave a loud sigh and raised his head only to be met with Lily's pitiful emerald green eyes. He jumped almost immediately, as though he had just remembered she was there and Lily felt her mouth curve into a smile. Her legs felt as light as air under his surprised gaze as she strode over to his table a few feet away carrying her own newly-bloomed red rose. As soon as she had arrived, James's eyes widened. "What's the matter?" he asked suspiciously, looking around as though expecting someone to jump out and yell, "Surprise!"
Lily struggled against the strong urge to plant a kiss on his lips. "Nothing's the matter." She replied, rolling her eyes. "It just looks like you could use a little help is all."
She watched in amusement as he blinked. "You're...going to help me." He said, looking at her like he was unsure of her sanity.
The girl shrugged and responded simply, "If you want it."
James looked as though he wanted to shout out, "Hell, yes!" but he didn't. He instead chose to say calmly, "If you wouldn't mind."
"I don't mind." Lily replied quietly. She would never mind, really, but she did not tell him so. She placed her rose in front of her and took out her wand. Swirling her wand once, she muttered the countercharm. As though she had turned back time, the rose's blood red petals folded back into a small rosebud. "Now." She said determinedly, the side that had made her Headgirl coming out. She stared at him and when he continued to look at her blankly, she waved her wand at him, telling him without words to pull his out.
"Oh." His cheeks turned a brilliant red. "Sorry." And he pulled his own out.
Lily fought the urge to smile. "Now," she said again, "You wave your wand once, and you say the incantation. Watch me." She did what she had said and she watched her rose bloom another time. She looked at him. "You try now."
But the Headboy was not listening. He was staring at her as though captivated by some unseen light with his mouth hanging open and his hazel eyes shining strangely. When he spoke, his voice had an amazed tone to it. "You know you smell great, don't you?" he asked, his eyes still set on her.
He never was in his right mind to start with, she thought amusedly, But he always goes mad when he's within two feet of me. "Thanks, Potter." She said, a small smile lighting up her face. "That's nice of you to say." How am I going to teach him when he's like this?
James was still staring.
"Potter." Lily said, getting annoyed now. He didn't react. "Potter!" nothing. "Potter!" she glared at him as the class turned to watch them. She was only vaguely aware of this when she raised a hand to slap him. James' eyes widened.
"Okay, okay!" he said, backing away. "I'm sorry!"
"You better be." Lily muttered, averting her eyes from the class's. She felt like she and James were a married couple bickering about the smallest thing. And with a jolt, she realized that she didn't really mind. She was getting soft! "Potter." She said once again. "Do you want my help or not?"
"I want more than your help," The boy said slyly, his mouth unfolding into a smirk that melted everything within a mile, "But I'll settle for it for now." He continued, the suggestive smirk vanishing and the famous grin replacing it.
The Headgirl couldn't help but blush slightly. "Then go ahead and try it."
James did what he was told. He waved his wand once and muttered the incantation. They both watched expectantly as the bud...did nothing.
Confused, Lily looked at him. "You're distracted." She said. "You can't charm something if you're not paying attention to it."
"It seemed to work with the ladies." James teased, wiggling his eyebrows.
"Oh, please." Lily muttered dryly, rolling her eyes. "Now will you please get a move on?"
He chuckled, but he did it anyway. He repeated the same routine and watched the bud again as it lay there. "The flower just doesn't like me." He said, shrugging and giving the bud a little prod.
"You're still distracted!" the girl exclaimed, throwing a glare at James. "Concentrate, for goodness' sake!"
"I'm trying to, but it's kind of hard to concentrate when the girl of my dreams is standing next to me and I can't do a single thing about it."
Lily raised her eyebrows, but otherwise chose to ignore his comment. "Just do it."
James sighed. "Fine." And he closed his eyes. Lily chose this time to exhale slowly, trying to calm her beating heart. After a few moments, however, James opened his eyes and tried once again to complete the charm. They watched the bud. Nothing, once again. "Bloody hell." James muttered, throwing his hands up. "It is just so-!" his eyes opened wide as he watched the white bud. It was blooming. Finally. Lily felt herself captivated by the beautiful white flower, unfolding its petals right before her very eyes.
"Oh." she said once it had finished. The flower looked awfully familiar. "It's a-." she didn't get a chance to finish.
"It's a lily." James continued for her, giving her a sidelong glance. He picked it up delicately in his hands. "It's beautiful, isn't it?"
Lily immediately regretted helping James as soon as she felt his hand touch her face. I had to go and help him, she thought as she closed her eyes. One moment of weakness was all that it took, one moment. If she hadn't have come, if she hadn't have given in...this wouldn't be happening. She felt her hair being tucked behind her ear and the stem of the white lily joining it. Her eyes were still closed. She fought against her feelings. This is breaking the rules, she said in her head. But it felt too right to be bad...
It took a couple of seconds for her to realize the bell had rung. She opened her eyes, her cheeks still flushed and her eyes still slightly tearing. James was still there. He was watching her with sad eyes. "Is there something wrong?" he asked worriedly, letting his arm fall down to his side once again. Part of Lily watched it fall in sadness and part watched it fall in triumph.
"Er..." was all Lily could manage.
The class was empty now. She and James were alone. The Head boy gave her a smile, but it did nothing to hide the sadness in his eyes. Lily was amazed at the differences that had taken place in him in such a short amount of time. He had gone from that lovesick fool, to that sly Marauder and to how Lily loved him the most. He was willing to sacrifice his own happiness for what he thought was hers. He put away his things slowly. "You can keep the lily." He said softly. "You did most of the work."
Lily watched him turn in true sadness. She cared for this man...she couldn't bear seeing him trying so hard to suppress his feelings when he didn't need to. But she did not act. As much as she wanted to, Lily just couldn't bring herself to do anything about it.
Before James exited the classroom, he turned to her and said gently, "I'll see you in the common room tonight, Evans...I suppose." He gave her one last weary smile and went off, leaving Lily quite alone. She watched the door for some time, until she woke herself up. As she turned her head to get her stuff in her bag, she noticed the smallest speck of white floating along beside her face. The lily. Reaching up to retrieve it, she wondered just what James was thinking as he had placed it there. She stared at the flower in her cupped hands and couldn't stop a smile from spreading on her face. Always the romantic one, she thought fondly.
When she walked out the classroom a few moments later, the Lily was tucked behind her ear again.
Maybe...just maybe...this rule was meant to be broken.
There it is...just make up your own ending...because all the endings I come up with end up being so effing corny...But that's what I get for being a hopeless Romantic, I guess...go ahead and fill the rest in. Now after that, all you need to do to make me ridiculously happy is...guess what? REVIEW! Review, dammit! Yours Truly, Kimmy ;D