Hello everyone, this is my first attempt at writing a story on couples from CID. Please review and let me know what you think :) Any and every suggestion is most appreciated. Thanks in advance!
It's a beautiful day Daya thought. He woke up, made himself a cup of coffee and sat outside to get some fresh air. He sat there thinking "Aaj mere life main sab kuch hai. CID join karke itne saal hogaye. Aaj lagraha hai ki main akela nahi rah ab. Meri bhi ek family hai jisme Abhijeet jaisa bhai hai, Tarika jaisi bhabhi hai aur ACP sir aur Dr. Salunkhe jaise father figures hain, Purvi jaisi behen, sachin aur rajat jaise chote bhai... Aaj sach much ek alag sa sukoon mehsoos horaha hai yeh sochkar ki meri life adhoori nahi hai. Sab acha hai!" He had a broad smile thinking all this. He was so content in his thoughts that he didn't even notice that there was someone sitting in the chair across from his looking at him with a smile.
Person: Kis baat per itna muskurarahe ho?
Daya: Muskuranekeliye bhi koi vajah ki zaroorat hai? Main bas khush hu ki aaj main yaha hu tere saath, saare CID team ke saath... acha lagraha hai ki sab acha jaraha hai life mein. Vaise tum kub aaye Abhijeet?
Abhijeet: Bas abhi aaya. Maine hello bhi bola lekin tu apni soch mein tha to socha disturb na karu. Vaise aaj mujhe tujhse ek cheez chahiye.
Daya: Woh kya?
Abhijeet: Thoda time. Mere saath kahi chalega?
Daya: Kaha chalna hai? Aur aaj to sunday hai tu yaha kya karraha hai? Tarika se milne nahi gaya?
Abhijeet: Tarika se to milna hi hai lekin aaj usne tujhe mere saath laneko kaha hai. Usko tumse baat karni hai. Kehrahi thi koi zaroori baat hai.
Daya: Sab theek to hai na? Tarika ko mujhse kya kaam?
Abhijeet: Jab chaloge tab pata chalega na! Ab jaldi se tayaar hojao aur chalo mere saath.
Daya: Itna to batado ki kaha jana hai?
Abhijeet: Are yaar tum chalo to sahi.
Daya went in to get ready. He didn't know if he should be worried because Abhijeet said it's a serious matter but what could it be... He got ready and came out in 10-15 minutes and he and Abhijeet got in the car and drove off.
In car:
Daya: Ab to batade yaar hum ja kaha rahe hain aur Tarika ne mujhe kyu bulaya aur tu intna serious kyu hai?
Abhijeet: Saas to le mere bhai... Itne sare sawaal ek saath? Thoda sa to wait kar hi sakte ho na. (In the mean time Abhijeet's phone rang and he stopped the car to answer it.)
The car was stopped in front of a really nice fancy building and Daya could see that it was definitely meant for parties and such. He was looking around and then looked at where Abhijeet was standing only to see that Abhijeet was not there anymore. He got out of the car and thought it must've been a call from Tarika so he went to talk in private. He was admiring the surroundings when suddenly he heard Abhijeet's scream.
Daya was worried sick and he started running in the direction from where he heard Abhijeet's scream, inside the building. He kept shouting "Abhijeet kaha ho tum"... He tried to call his cell but it wasn't going through and then he heard "Daya idhar... main is kamre main hoo".
Daya ran in and saw Abhijeet standing in the middle of the room with a completely blank expression. He didn't say a word when daya ran into the room screaming his name. The room was dark with a little light coming through the window. He could barely make out anything in the room and frankly he wasn't concerned about anything.
Daya: Abhijeet tu thik to hai? Kya hua? Mujhe teri cheekne ki aawaaz sunayi di par tu to thik hai. Kya ho raha hai?
Abhijeet: Yaar main woh...
Suddenly the lights went on and the whole CID team came forward singing "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Daya, happy birthday to you!" everyone clapped hard and Purvi and Tarika brought in a beautifully decorated cake and placed it on the table near Daya.
Daya didn't know how to react. He wasn't sure if he should be angry with Abhijeet for making him worried or if he should be happy that everyone around him cares SO much that they all went out of their way to make Daya's birthday so special.
Abhijeet: Sorry yaar tujhe is tarah yaha lanekeliye. woh... sab chahte the ki tujhe yeh sari planning ka kuch pata na chale. isliye yeh sab kiya...
All the while Daya was still speachless but his eyes were moist. He didn't know what to say to anyone. All he did was went to abhijeet and hugged him really tight.
Daya: Tu mera bhai hi nahi mera sabkuch hai.
Tarika, Rajat, Purvi, Sachin, Freddy, Pankaj, ACP sir, Dr. Salunkhe: Aur hum sab kuch bhi nahi?
Sachin: Lo, sari planning hum sab karein aur sara credit jata hai Abhijeet sir ko... yeh kya baat hui...
Freddy: Haan sir, maine aur Pankaj ne itne ache se sara decoration kiya aur hame koi tareef nahi milegi?
Pruvi & Tarika: Aur humne jo cake banaya uska kya?
Rajat: Yeh sabhi sahi keh rahe hain sir. Ab hum sab aapse naraaz hain.
They all made fake angry faces and at this point Daya let Abhijeet go and went to ACP sir and Dr. Salunkhe to take their blessing.
ACP sir: Jeete raho beta. Tujhe saari khushiyan mile.
Dr. Salunkhe: Hamesha khush raho beta.
Daya: Aap sab ke rehte mujhe kabhi kisi cheez ki kami nahi hogi. Aap sab hi to mera parivaar hain. Kisi ek ke na hone par bhi meri life adhoori rehjati. Main to aaj itna khush hu ki bata bhi nahi sakta.
Everyone got a little emotional with that so they all dropped their fake anger and came to Daya and hugged him and wished him. Daya cut the cake and everyone fed Daya cake and Daya fed everyone and Abhijeet covered his face with cake frosting and Daya was all smiles.
Daya now noticed the decorations and was impressed. He said to Freddy and Pankaj:
Daya: Tum dono ne to mere hosh udadiye. Kya decoration hai... lekin yeh sara kuch pink kyu hai?
Pankaj: Sir woh... woh kya hai na ki jab main store gaya tha to... woh...
Rajat: Hum batate hain sir, waha store main ek lady salesperson thi. Unko dekhte hi hamare Pankaj ke hosh udgaye. Jab un devi ji ne pucha ki aapko kya chahiye to hamare sahab kuch bol hi nahi paye... bas muh se itni baat nikli "party". Toh unhone inke haath main jo thamadiya woh lekar aagaye!
Pankaj now embarrassed: Arre nahi sir... aisa kuch nahi tha sir.
Daya: Are wah Pankaj, ab toh tu bhi bada hogaya. Kya baat hai!
Tarika: Haan Daya, ab to Pankaj bhi bada hogaya par tum bade nahi hue ab tak.
Daya: Arre Tarika, tum bhi na... vaise Abhijeet bataraha tha ki tum mujhse kuch zaroori baat karna chahti ho? Kya baat hai?
Tarika: Daya woh meri ek saheli hai, Pooja. Usko tumse najane kab se pyaar hai. hamesha teri photos dekhke baat karti rehti hai. voh chahti hai ki main tumhe usse ek baar miladu. Kya kehte ho?
Daya: uhhh... Tarika, tum jaanti ho ki mujhe yeh sare chakkar mein nahi padna. Toh kyu insist karrahi ho?
Abhijeet: Wah bhai, tumko bhabhi chahiye thi to tumne mujhe encourage kiya Tarika ke saath aage badhne ko. Aaj mujhe ek bhabhi ki zaroorat hai to tu nahi sunega hamari baat?
Daya: Yaar aisi baat nahi hai, bas mujhe kisi anjaan ladki se nahi milna.
ACP sir: Abhijeet bilkul sahi keh raha hai Daya. Agar tum uske piche na padte to woh Tarika ke saath kabhi baat aage nahi badhata. To ab woh tumhe ek ladki se milne ko keh raha hai to tum kyu mana karrahe ho?
Dr. Salunkhe agreed to that saying "Abhijeet ne to sahi kiya lekin... bechari Tarika ka future kharaab hogaya"
Abhijeet looked at Dr. Salunkhe with an angry face but Tarika held his hand suggesting to let it go all the while giggling about what he said.
Daya: Sir aap bhi yeh keh rahe hain?
Everyone else: Hum sab bhi yehi kehte hain!
Daya was surprised that everyone wanted this to happen. Due to all the pressure he finally agreed to go meet this girl but was not at all interested.
After this, they all had small chit-chat, ate more cake, and then ACP sir and Dr. Salunkhe decided to head home because it was getting late.
ACP sir: Chalo ab hum nikalte hain. Kal bohot kaam hai tho jaldi Beurou jana hai. Kal ek new member bhi join karne wali hai.
Abhijeet and Daya: Acha sir kon hai?
Purvi: Koi bhi ho, main to bohot khush hu kyu ki mujhe ek female partner mil jayegi. varna to main Pankaj ke kharaab jokes sun sun ke thak gayi hu... and she made a face looking at Pankaj.
ACP sir: Kal aayegi tab mil lena. Aur tum sab enjoy karo, hum chalte hain. Daya, happy birthday once again. Aur haan, acha hai ki tum bhi apne personal life main aage badne ka soch rahe ho.
Daya just smiled. After this the two people left. Now that they left, Purvi played loud club music and they all enjoyed themselves.
Abhijeet took advantage of the situation and went to dance with Tarika. Daya looked at them and they both were looking so happy. He looked at them and thought to himself "Kaha ho tum..."
After the party everyone went to their respective homes. Daya, Abhijeet, and Tarika were in the car and Abhijeet was driving. Daya was sitting in the back seat looking out the window lost in his own thoughts.
Tarika: Daya tum kya soch rahe ho?
Daya came out of his thoughts and said "kuch bhi to nahi. Aaj party achi thi na... bohot maza aaya"
Tarika: Haan maza to aaya. Sab lab aur Bureau ke bahar milte hain to kitne free hojate hain na. Aaj kitni masti kar rahe the sab...
Abhijeet: Haan Tarika bilkul. ACP sir aur aapke doctor sahab jab nikle tabse to aur bhi maza aya. He was hinting at their time together dancing and those few moments when they got to be in close proximity.
Tarika got a little shy and looked in the other direction and Abhijeet slowly grabbed her right hand. She was not expecting it and when he did take her hand, she blushed harder and tried to free her hand hinting that Daya is sitting in the back.
Daya was lost in his thoughts and Abhijeet noticed it. Soon they were in front of Tarika's house and Abhijeet got down to wish her good night. Abhijeet got back in the car.
Abhijeet: Daya aage ake baitho na.
Daya was still lost so Abhijeet shouted louder at which point Daya jerked out of his thoughts and said "Arre Abhijeet, Tarika ko itni jaldi good night boldiya?"
Abhijeet: haan bol diya par tu kaha khoya hua hai? aage aake baith.
Daya got down the car and came to the front seat and said "aisi koi baat nahi hai yaar bas thak gaya hu aur kuch nahi."
Abhijeet: Tu khush to hai na yaar?
Daya: Are mere bhai main bohot bohot bohot khush hu. Mere paas nakhush hona ki koi vajah hi nahi hai.
He gave a warm smile to Abhijeet and he got convinced that everything was alright. He dropped Daya home and went towards his home.
Daya went inside and made himself a cup of coffee. He sat on his couch and decided to look through his precious photo album. In that album he had pictures of all the people that meant a lot to him. He was flipping through the book and came across pictures of him and Abhijeet on several occassions, he found a picture of Purvi tying him a rakhi on raksha bandhan one year and a picture where everyone were doing masti together... Then he flipped to the end of the book because he wanted to see the picture of the girl he was thinking about since the time Tarika forced him to go on a date with her friend.
He was talking to himself now:
Pata nahi tumse main kabhi mil paunga bhi ya nahi. Vo thoda sa waqt jo humne saath bitaya vo main bhul hi nahi paaraha hu. Yeh baat ko hue bhi do saal se zyada hogaya aur aaj bhi main tumhare bare mein soch raha hu. main bhi kitna pagal hu. Aaj tak itna ajeeb feeling mere mann mein kisikeliye bhi nahi hua.
He closed his eyes for a few seconds hoping to clear his mind. He got up and put the album away and got ready to go to sleep... He decided tomorrow's a new day and he'll start fresh and forget all about the girl.
So, what did you think? Too long? Too short? Story moving too slow or too fast?