The Scroll of sparks – Tale six
'Family'
By Nelarun
Naruto © Kishimoto
Darui was sitting on a bridge overlooking a park where children were playing. He thought it would be nice to have siblings… he was an only child, orphaned during the third shinobi war so really siblings were out of the question; but children? Now there was a possibility. Daughters, he wanted daughters. Wait, no he didn't – he'd have to kill anyone who dared to look at them wrong… and then he'd have to hide the bodies so sons then. He'd like sons. Lots of sons; a whole house full of sons!
Wait… first he'd have to buy a house… and oh yeah – perhaps his hypothetical wife didn't want a house full of kids. Well that would be awkward. Hmm… perhaps he could seduce the idea to her? What was he thinking! She was his wife! All he had to do was say 'now listen here wife, I want kids, a whole house full of kids!' and she would… okay she'd probably maim him terribly… and make him sleep on the couch or at Jounin Barracks where they would laugh at him and his social standing and ability to show his face in public would be ruined. So that option was out – back to the seducing. Damn, they'd only (hypothetically) been married for a few hours and only (hypothetically) met a few days ago… perhaps he was going a little too fast? Okay. New plan!
Step One: give her time to settle into a new village (tomorrow morning worked didn't it?)
Step Two: buy excellent cuts of meat for her dogs (she had dogs, lots of battle ready, rip-your-throat-out dogs) – they may be ninja dogs but they were dogs and dogs would forgive a lot for prime steak.
Step Three: find her favourite foods and ply her with it.
Step Four: a house full of babies!
Oh… Wait…
Step Four: buy a house.
Step Five: a house full of babies!
Mabui frowned at him as she thrust a pack of takoyaki at his chest. "You're plotting," she accused.
"Shinobi," he shrugged and glanced at the girl cheerfully attacking her kaarage-don. "Oi Mabui, how do you feel about kids?"
"They're okay."
"Hmm. And how many kids would you like?"
Mabui glanced at him and shuffled away. "Pervert," she mumbled.
Darui blinked. "No! Not you and me! That would be… I mean you're… you! And I'm… not you and…" Darui shuddered and missed Mabui going from cautious to outraged and bemused.
"Yeah… well you aren't that great a catch yourself. Look at you! You exude laziness! What kids of woman would want you?"
"Lots of women!"
"Eww!" Mabui almost squealed. "Stop talking! I don't need to know about your imaginary love life!"
"Just the other night I got together with-"
"Darui!"
"And we went all night long and it was-"
"Lalala!"
Darui smirked and returned to his food.
So what if he didn't have any siblings, he had Mabui and she was worth as many siblings as he wished he ever had. He nudged her side, she spilled green tea over him. Didn't mean she wasn't a brat…