Timeline: Post "What You See is What You See" but before "Summer in The City."
Category: MacxDanny pairing. Implied slash, for now.
Summary: This is the first chapter in the Everything is Connected Trilogy. Danny is trying to make up for his past mistakes, if only Mac will let him. Mac doesn't understand why Danny Messer can get under his skin all the time.
Disclaimer: If I owned Danny Messer or Mac Taylor, would I be wasting my time in front of a PC to write this story? Oh, alright. I don't own them. I'm not getting anything from this apart from a deep sense of fulfilment.
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Unresolved
I don't need to fight
To prove I'm right
I don't need to be forgiven-------------------------------------------------
"So, you and me, we good?"
"We'll see."
Fuck! What kind of crap answer is that? Danny took another long drag from his cigarette. He wasn't much of a smoker but at least it gave him something to do with his hands. Two weeks after the shooting and he still feels sick every time he thinks about it. His heart would start to pound and his hands would to shake, not so much that he couldn't do his job, but enough for Aiden to give him the look. She was just trying to look out for him but sometimes he just wished that she would just leave it alone.
He wanted to talk to somebody so bad he felt he could scream, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. Who would he call anyway? Aiden? Flack? Some fancy lawyer Mac thought could help him? The truth was if he started talking now, he felt like he couldn't stop. He was afraid, not that he would ever admit it, that if he let others take a peek at what he was hiding then his carefully placed walls would come crumbling down.
Keep it together, Messer. This is no time to be having a breakdown.
Danny sighed and flicked the burnt down stump outside his window. Okay, so he messed up, again. Time for some damage control.
He's off the promotion grid.
He'll work his ass twice as hard to prove himself to Mac. He'll crack more cases than any of the other CSIs combined. Eventually they'll have to see what a good CSI he is and put him back on the promotion grid.
He shot a cop.
Well, technically, he didn't actually kill Officer Menhaus. His statement to the IAB was damaging and he should have listened to Mac but if he stayed by the book then the IAB will lose interest and he'll be off the hook.
He lied to Mac about his involvement with Tanglewood.
It wasn't a direct lie. He told Mac the truth, or as close to it as he dared. If Mac doesn't bring it up then he won't either.
Interesting how all of his reasoning had something to do with Mac. Guess that means everything really is connected after all.
Danny lighted another cigarette.
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Danny Messer was one of the most intriguing men Mac Taylor had ever met. There was just so much enigma around him, so many layers, that just when he thought he finally had Danny placed in the right box, something else comes up and he has to start categorizing all over again. It was most... disconcerting.
He could be a good CSI, Mac mused to himself, if he would just let the evidence speak for itself and not jump right in with all his theories and intuition. A CSI has to be objective. A CSI cannot be biased and let his feelings cloud his judgement. Danny Messer would make a great CSI someday, if only he would learn to control his emotions.
That particular thought brought a smile to Mac's face. A stoic Danny Messer? The possibility of that happening is like having Aiden and Flack walking hand in hand into his office to announce their upcoming marriage. Possible, but not probable.
Idly, Mac flipped through Danny's psych evaluation folder. He's read through it at least twice and there was nothing in there to suggest that Danny wasn't fit to do his job. His answers were evasive at times, as the department's resident psychiatrist duly noted, and carefully constructed, that had to be Aiden's influence, but he was "otherwise mentally sound and capable of performing his duties under strict supervision."
Strict supervision? If he even looked at a piece of evidence the wrong way, Mac was going to haul Danny Messer's stubborn ass into his office and give him a talking to that he won't forget in a long time. Or at least for a week, Mac sighed resignedly. He closed the file with a flourish and pushed it to the side.
What was it about Detective Third Grade CSI Danny Messer that makes him lose his cool every time? And what on earth was he going to about it?
Mac reached out for his mug only to find it devoid of any caffeinated beverage. A glance to the coffee maker machine confirmed his suspicion that he had once again spent the entire night in his office and has probably drunk the entire pot himself in the process. Dawn was only a few more hours in coming and he might as well catch a couple of hours of sleep in the bunkroom before taking a shower and changing his clothes in the locker room. With all the caffeine in his blood, he'll be lucky to get twenty minutes of precious sleep, but then again, he was used to it by now.
Time to go brew more coffee.
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"What've we got?"
Detective Flack looked up from his notebook and nodded towards the general direction of the double story house.
"Double homicide. First victim is in the master bedroom. Strangled to death. Second vic is at the bottom of the stairs. Blunt force trauma to the head, possibly before or after he fell down three flights of step."
"Looks like we got our work cut out for us. Who discovered the bodies?"
"Delivery man. Looked in through the front window and saw one of the vics."
Mac nodded and silently digested the information. Through the corner of his eye he can see Danny already slipping on his latex gloves. No matter what has happened these past few weeks, Danny was still one of the members of his team. Trust and co-dependency has to override any personal disgruntlement they had with each other. Time to get to work.
"Danny, you process the one in the bedroom. Look for anything suspicious that can possibly be the murder weapon."
"I'm on it."
Danny pulled on his gloves tighter. He could feel Mac's eyes burning a hole through the back of his head. He wanted to look up and meet Mac glare for glare.
Why can't you just trust me? Can't you see I'm trying?
Danny was spending a few more seconds fiddling with his gloves than necessary. Mac wished he could say something to ease the younger man's obvious tension but couldn't bring himself to do it. He was doing the right thing. Danny has to learn the hard way.
Please don't let me down again. I want to trust you.
Detective Don Flack watched the interplay with mild curiosity but was smart enough not to get involved. At this rate however, Danny will probably cut off blood circulation to his arm and Mac's eyes might pop right out of his sockets. A little distraction seems to be in order.
"Take your time guys, it's not like they're getting any more dead."
Worked like a charm, Don kept his smile in check when two pairs of stormy eyes looked up and right through his skull. Or then again, maybe not, he winced when Danny suddenly shouldered him, hard, on his way to the crime scene.
"I'm going to go process the second body," Mac's voice sounded neutral but his eyes were practically screaming a warning to Don to stay out of this.
"You do that."
As Mac Taylor walked up the short path to the front door, Don rubbed his sore shoulder and smiled. Something was definitely going on and what kind of a detective would he be if he didn't get to the bottom of it? This was going to be fun.
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Author's Notes:
I've removed the outtakes. They might eventually end up with a chapter of their own, but at the moment I'm trying to keep the angst level high.
