A Gilded Cage
There is a proverb about caged birds. Wildly known, it simply states that when the cage is opened, the bird will fly away.
Everyone are caged birds. If they can choose, they will fly away.
***********************
Rain had unlocked the motel room door with a swipe key, mumbling not for the first time that Neo-Japan needed to expand the Gundam Fight budget enough so that she and Domon could spring for separate motel rooms more than once in a while. She entered first, Domon trailing behind her. When they were both inside, the latter absently kicked the door shut with the base of his heel.
Domon unclasped his cloak and tossed it on a nearby chair. Rain was saying something to him, but he paid her no mind and settled himself on the floor. Domon couldn't deny that he had been overlooking his normal meditation schedule for the past few months and the combination of having a lot on his mind to deal with and wondering just how ashamed of him his master would be if Fuhai Toho were to find out, the young King of Hearts set aside the spare hours for some much needed reflection.
The Minaret Gundam was a pile of rubble, smoking still from the blows it had be dealt the day before. It was empty, though, the pilot long since taken away. Domon Kasshu had come looking for clues, surely something that could give him information on the Devil Gundam remained after the battle. Domon had exhausted the clues Neo-Japan supplied him with...Neo-Italy, Neo-America, Neo-China, Neo-France, Neo-Russia...they gave him nothing, no sign of his brother or his father's monster.
The countries he had traveled to since had different results and Domon intended to use whatever information he could. Earlier, Rain had refused to let Domon get near Seitt and where she was now, the young man didn't profess to know. But, he reasoned, she could hardly find some excuse to keep him away from Seitt's Gundam, short of becoming the ill man's partner, in which case the fourth article of the Gundam Fight International Treaty would come into play.
At this point, Domon couldn't imagine being surprised if she did that. Rain obviously saw no reason to be with him any longer. The only reason he was even still in Neo-Turkey was because he wanted to put off saying good-bye as long as he could. Domon hadn't gotten the chance to say good-bye to his master, his mother, his father or his brother--he'd be damned if he didn't get to have closure at least once.
His snooping in the Minaret Gundam proved to be fruitless where the Devil was concerned. In fact, the only thing he saw here was what he had seen before...that photograph of Rain and Seitt in college, his arm looped behind her back and hand resting on her shoulder. The picture was a blatant reminder of what he should be doing--saying good-bye and be off on his way. After all, his own father was more important to Domon than some girl who after no contact for ten years started following him around and nagging him, right?
Looking at the photo, Domon made a split second decision--if Rain belonged to Seitt, it was only fair that he got the picture. After all, Seitt had it the entire time Rain was the Japanese Figher's partner. With the offending lover torn out, Domon slipped the picture into his cloak and was on his way.
Domon Kasshu now had the distinct feeling someone had been a damned fool. As a man just smart enough to acknowledge his own slow wits, Domon, per usual, suspected it had been himself.
He turned away from her again, pushing, always pushing her away. And yet she laughed, and yet she smiled and yet she told him she was his partner. His partner. Where was that conviction yesterday? Where was that certitude when he wished to carry out his duty as Neo-Japan's Gundam Fighter?
It was gone, replaced by a burning and twisting in the pit of his stomach, the likes of which he had felt before, but never in a predicament such as this. Domon had come to accept that feeling as a part of his determination, the voice that said 'I want to be able to do that' when his mentor had shown him a new technique. It was the part of him that pushed him on, the part that used to be relied on to tell him his goals and aspirations.
Yesterday, however, that was not the case. Yesterday, he knew his goals. Free his father. Defeat his brother. That was his purpose, his goal, his mission, his duty, his life summed up in six words. Until the recent trip to Neo-Canada, he had been absorbed by this, confidant to a fault in his ability. A fault that had nearly cost him her.
Rain.
His Rain.
His ambition put her in danger, his arrogance and belief he could make it on his own showed him one undeniable truth. Even if he could, he didn't want to.
Yesterday, he faced the possibly that he had to. Her duty as a doctor came before her duty as his partner.
In full Medic-Mode, Rain had refused to let Domon battle the ill Neo-Turkish Fighter, Seitt. She chose to stay by his bedside while the jilted Japanese man pressed on about his duty to destroy all things connected to the Devil Gundam. Ironically, Rain's former lover fell into this sect. Well, that's life for you.
Seitt himself chose to fight, something Domon had to qualms with, despite Rain's protests. When the fight was over, Seitt was hospitalized. He should have been killed, but the tears of the woman he loved had saved him.
And Domon, the fool, had to accept that whether he wanted to or not, he was going to be doing this all himself. But that was yesterday and this was today.
All this, Domon tried to understand sitting cross-legged on the floor of a seedy motel room. Meditation, self-knowledge...to the martial artist these things were important. Perhaps he even would have been able to understand had Rain not found the picture, had not clouded his mind with sweet denial.
***********************
The seven of diamonds goes under the eight of spades. Flip over the card that was hidden by the seven and place the nine of clubs and four cards in its wake under that. Three cards off the deck and the queen of hearts is on top. About to take three more cards, Rain Mikamura stopped the game long enough to unhook and answer the video-phone.
As usual, her father had made of his sporadic calls to check up on her. Yes, she was fine. Yes, the duo of Japan were on their way to Domon's next challenge. Yes, she was still perfectly able to put up with him...
After she hung up, Rain turned to Domon, who was currently sitting on the floor of their motel room, meditating and pointedly ignoring everything around him, including Rain and her conversation. His cloak had been haphazardly thrown over a vacant arm chair when they entered roughly forty minutes before. Domon had been on the carpet, cross-legged ever since. Rain couldn't get a word out of him, which bothered her only because she fully intended to tease him about the way his cheeks had flared scarlet when she told him she was his partner. Mirth was a rare thing these days, a desperately needed accommodation. When it came to teasing there was much too short window of opportunity and it appeared this one had closed.
Looking at Domon, Rain felt a twinge of guilt. She had neglected to tell her father how close she had come to not having need to 'put up with him.' Seitt... She hadn't realized how much she missed him... Rain felt guilty about that as well. Had her life gone the way she had been planning not four months ago, she would be with Seitt at that very moment, and all moments in sight. Instead, she was chasing a childhood friend around the world, who in turn was chasing his brother and Rain hadn't even stopped to think about Seitt after the first few weeks.
She wanted to chalk that one up to the deranged turn her life had taken, but she knew she couldn't. She pushed her chair back, apparently forgetting about the game of solitaire still waiting to be continued on the small, somewhat sticky desk.
Rain began packing what mechanical components she had scattered across the room earlier, knowing full well it had been foolish of her to resume tinkering on a side project after giving up on Domon. They wouldn't be here long enough for her to get anything done. Leisure time would be nice as well. Leisure time and mirth.
Not that it mattered so much at the moment. She just couldn't concentrate. Rain supposed she must still have too much of the past afternoon in her thoughts. Solitaire was the only thing her still reeling mind could comprehend.
"Hello?" Tentatively, Rain Mikamura entered the hospital room. Had she not been a doctor in her own right, she never would have been admitted to see the patient, but as it stood, she had acted as his primary caregiver earlier and had rights concerning his treatment. While Rain did relinquish her duties to one of the hospital's staff when she was sure he would make a full recovery, she still came for one last glimpse.
The man she had come to see was asleep, resting comfortably. Rain smiled slightly in a disappointed, self-mocking gesture. She wanted to say good-bye this time, but he wasn't awake to hear it. Gently, she lay a bouquet of flowers on the dresser.
"Seitt..." she whispered. "Please, don't think I hate you this time. I could never hate you." She sighed, dashing her fingers underneath her eyes. "Don't hate me either, all right? I couldn't stand it if you hated me."
A few tears slipped from Rain's eyes and she blinked them away, marveling that she still had a few tears left. She thought she must have used them all up by now.
"I want my life back," she muttered. "But that's not going to happen, is it?"
She opened her purse and rummaged through it, pulling out a photograph.
"You know, I've carried this around with me ever since you gave me a copy. Even though I've had it with me, I haven't looked at it once since this whole mess started. Here," Rain slipped the glossy image onto the bureau with the decorative floral arrangement. "You take it...and remember me."
She snapped her purse shut and turned away.
Even after she exited the hospital, Rain found herself unable to tear herself completely away. So caught up in gazing through Seitt's window, she didn't notice when a shadow fell across her. Silence reigned for a long moment.
"So," Rain said, shifting to face the one who was blocking the sun, "where are we headed?"
"You're not going to stay?" was the immediate response of Domon Kasshu.
"The government knows that Seitt was sick, so they won't be hard on him," Rain said. "The hospital here can handle the rest."
"Is that so?" Domon mused.
"My role as a doctor ends here," Rain replied. "I am now, once again, your partner." His face contorted, turning shades of red. He spun around so that his back was to her.
"Thank you, Domon."
He grumbled something in response and walked away. Rain laughed and ran after him.
Her partner.
Finished with her packing, Rain pulled her self away from the reverie. How long was she going to be dwelling on this? She hadn't felt this way the first time she walked away from Seitt. Why did it all seem so different only a few months later?
The Reason--even if Rain didn't want to accept it--had thrown his cloak over a chair, so she bent to pick that up as well. Tidying up was a nice menial task that kept her from thinking..or maybe it let her think. Or maybe she should just pray for tomorrow to hurry up and come.
Rain lifted the red, ripped cloth and folded it over a few times. She turned to look at Domon, just to see if he had any reaction to her picking up after him. Domon was funny about such things--he was liable to become absolutely livid if she suggested he clean up after himself, yet was also apt to become annoyed should she start fussing over his messes.
He was still meditating, though, legs crossed, eyes closed. Ignoring her. She felt so small at times such as these.
Rain laid the now neatly folded cloak on the seat of the armchair. She noticed two torn pieces of parchment on the floor underneath where she had set the cloak. Bending to retrieve them, Rain recalled that Domon was known to keep the photograph of his elder brother tucked into his cape. Sure enough, when she flipped over the first one, the familiar visage of Kyoji Kasshu was gazing outward, worried and uncomfortable as a nine-year-old with only his legs visible tumbled from his brother's shoulders.
As Rain's fingers brushed over the second fallen paper, she was able to confirm that it, too, was a photograph. That was odd. She hadn't known Domon carried another picture with him.
She turned this photo over as well and her breath caught in her throat.
Rain Mikamura, aged 20, found herself staring down at Rain Mikamura, aged 19. A darkly pigmented hand rested on her shoulder, but the man the hand belonged to had been torn out. Rain spun on her heel, ready to demand the meaning of this.
No longer on the floor, Domon, with his hand on the doorknob, stood. The words that had been on the tip of Rain's tongue faded into the recesses of her mind. The way Domon looked at her made Rain think of a child; too young to understand the truth, he told himself lies that were easier to accept and embrace.
There were no craters on the moon, there was a rabbit pounding moochi.
There was no science to explain precipitation, rain was a gift from the sky.
There was no such thing as sex, babies were delivered by the stork.
The door opened and slammed, and with it, Domon was gone.
***********************
Though she tried to keep a vigil until Domon returned, when he finally did--significantly cooled down and just a tad intoxicated--Rain was asleep, sitting curled up in the arm chair. His cloak was tangled in her arms, almost as though she was trying to protect it in his absence. The insurance that he would come back was on the desk with an abandoned game of solitaire. Lying next to the still face up queen of hearts was the Shining Gundam's starter key. Domon pocketed it, scolding himself for leaving it behind. He could have been long gone by now, confident once again that his Rain would follow him.
As for her, Domon scooped her up, deposited her on the bed and in the process freed his cloak from her grasp. He clasped it around his shoulders and went to leave again, this time intending to make the rest of the journey to his next fight. His hand on the doorknob, however, he stopped and turned back. Tossing the cloak on the chair once more, Domon locked the door, something Rain had failed to do earlier and made himself a permanent fixture for the night.
Looking back at Rain, Domon snorted.
"Partners, huh?"
***********************
Yet, if the bird returns, then the one who caged it knows it really belonged to him. If the bird does not come back, then the creature's spirit was never truly caged.
Everyone are caged birds. No one may fly away.
Love is a gilded cage.
Sore de wa...Gundam Fight! Ready? Go!
Disclaimers: I don't own G Gundam. (But with luck I'll own a Shining Gundam model before too long.) As usual, I don't make money off G Gundam stuff such as fics, just spend it on G Gundam stuff such as art books.
Author Notes: I've got to thank SporkGoddess for making this fic possible. I never would have been able to write it without her episode 11 transcription.