beginning slices of childhood angst that is often over looked. hana.
1.
Ino knows alot of things. Things that go beyond taking care of flowers and training. Things like how to be a friend, a silent watcher from afar; but most importantly: how to care and act like you don't. Secretly, when she is not needed, Ino climbs up to her room when no one is around or calling for her. And from her window, Ino makes silent observations of the people and world that goes on around her. Ino never voices her thoughts about what she sees; instead she tucks them deep inside her. Despite what people might say; Ino knows alot of things that go unnoticed. Things about people, about teammates, about life.
In a sense, Ino knows more than Sakura does in the area of people. While Sakura prefered the soft calm of books; somewhere she can control everything. Ino prefered to watch people. The emotions that flicker through their faces, the way nothing was ever in their control; no matter how hard anyone tried.
As cruel as it was, Ino knew how to accept and understand.
And inevitably, move on.
2.
Sometimes, it hurts to think about what happened back then. But somehow, Ino can't help, but try and analyze it. Her mother once told her it was like picking at a scab; in the end all it will leave is an ugly scar. But Ino knows it is a scar she will have to bear either way it goes.
3.
Ino doesn't let the things she knows about people change the way she acts towards them. Instead, she acts indifferent and goes on being who she is because some things are better left unsaid.
4.
Ino says nothing when Sakura passes by.
Instead, she pulls a straight face.
Instead, she stays silent and still.
Instead, she watches as Sakura's back.
And wishes. And wishes. And wishes. That she could have that moment back, that she could have done something. Anything, just to try and change it. To say something that wouldn't be considered cruel or spiteful; to say something that for a moment would make them friends again. But Ino is smart enough to know that nothing ever comes easy, and with that Ino quietly chews over the moment she was given.
She is not being mean, Ino tells herself. You're just not the center of her life anymore. And Ino leaves it at that.
5.
Ino is not an average shinobi. Because she knows things; because instead of fighting evil and being a hero among heroes, Ino prefers to watch. And from her window, she learns more than she can from books. Ino knows that somewhere, Sakura is following Sasuke. Trying to win a battle that is already lost on Ino; but Ino never says such things. Not because she wishes unhappiness to Sakura, but because this is the only way Ino can keep her only friend at her fingertips.
Because it hurts, when Ino thinks about it, to understand Sakura's choice of first crush over best friend.
6.
Springtime, for some is a time of revial and birth.
For Ino, it is a time of remembrance.
Hands carelessly picking flowers from their grounds, and it's just like the yesterday of a yesteryear long past.
7.
'No, Sakura. Don't pick those. They aren't ready.' A tilted look directed her way.
'Ino, you're being silly. Flowers don't feel anything.' Silence.
'But they know when to let go.'
8.
'Flowers may not have feelings, but they know when it's time to let go.' Ino recited to herself.
Shying away from the branches, Ino bent over to pick up a bruised blossom. It was a damaged remnant of a time spent braiding hair in the valleys and being best friends forever. In the fashion that little girls often played.
It is a bittersweet memory that comes only once a year. And like the temporary moments inbetween wishing and watching Sakura's back and the still silence, Ino keeps it in her heart forever.
9.
Ino is not one to never learn from her mistakes. Brief experimenting with fire told her it hurts and picking flowers too late in bloom only meant disappointment. But somehow, Ino can't bring it past her to grasp the flower in her palm just a little bit tighter. There is a small pang in her heart when the wind sweeps it away from her, but she makes no effort to catch it as it sails away. Because Ino, even if her name was not, is like a flower. Ino knows when to hold on and when it's time to let go.