A/N: Harry Potter and its characters are not mine.

Chapter 1: Harry: The Damage is Done

Teddy Lupin is getting married.

Finally.

I mean, it has seriously taken that boy forever to get himself together. He's been dating Victoire for only, I dunno, the last TEN YEARS! He waited so long that all my kids have left school and started careers of their own.

Most of the family started teasing about wedding bells right after the three year mark. Truthfully, I'm surprised that they (Molly specifically) waited so long; Weasley family engagements tend to be on the fast track, and three years is not especially fast. The ribbing and awkward questions escalated in years four and five; led mainly by George, his son Fred, and James; but Teddy's relationship status never changed. By their sixth anniversary, the only one who ever mentioned marriage around Teddy or Victoire was James, and he would quickly be silenced by his mother or Aunt Hermione. I think my son is purposefully tactless. It really would not surprise me.

Once year nine rolled around it was clear that Victoire was getting impatient and was no longer buying his excuses. She had been patient when Teddy claimed he wanted to wait for her to graduate Hogwarts. She had understood when he wanted to put it off until he had finished his training at the Prophet and got a promotion. She had agreed when Teddy said he wanted to get his Grandmother settled in her new house before they took the plunge. I would continue this long list, but I can't even remember half the reasons he used to put off getting engaged. Finally, Victoire just got fed up with waiting for him and proposed herself.

Teddy told me later that he had been carrying the ring around in his pocket for the last three years. Apparently, when Victoire discovered this, two things happened: 1) her exasperation was slightly alleviated because he had been planning to ask her after all, which showed her he is not a complete idiot; and 2) she got even angrier at him because he had planned to ask her, but had not worked up enough courage. Her exact words were, "What were you afraid of? That I would say no? If I didn't want to marry you after 10 years of dating, I wouldn't have stuck around!"

After accepting her proposal, he told her that he had just wanted to make sure he could provide for her sufficiently. He confided to me afterward that she thought it was sweet, but slapped him rather hard on the back of the head for being such an idiot and thinking that he would have to do it all himself. They were in this together after all. A team.

Everyone was thrilled when they told us the news, and the wedding plans started within the hour, punctuated occasionally by tearful exclamations from Molly: "Oh, this is so exciting! I told Arthur last night that I had given up hope that you two would ever get married, but then you decide to surprise us like this! You beautiful children!" or "It's been so long since we last had a family wedding! Such joyful times always bring people closer together!" or "Oh! There's so much to do! I'll have to get out all the fine china, iron the good table cloths, clean out the attic (you never know who's going to go snooping around during a wedding. Every part of the house needs to be spotless!), and bake a cake with at least seven layers. Victoire, honey, what is your favorite flavor? Yes, Teddy dear, I know you like chocolate," or "James Potter! If you are going to be a groomsman at this wedding, there will be no pranks, no inappropriate jokes, no unauthorized fireworks, and absolutely no songs you've made up! We don't need a repeat of that incident at your cousin Lucy's wedding, do we? Do you understand me, young man?!"

Yes, you heard correctly. James S. Potter is in the wedding party. It makes sense since he and Teddy are practically brothers, but it's creating a lot of tension. Half the family is worried he will pull some kind of idiotic prank and the other half is hoping to be a part of it. He, however, refuses to confirm or deny that he is even considering such a plan. The only people who would know are two of his fellow groomsmen, Albus Potter and Scorpius Malfoy.

Yes, I said Malfoy. Shocking, I know.

The story of how Scorpius Malfoy is on such excellent terms with Teddy Lupin is a long and painful story that starts several years before Scorpius' birth. Lots of fights, hexes, lawsuits, tears, and a very small amount of laughter are involved. The short version is that Narcissa Malfoy and Andromeda Tonks reconciled after the war. The sisters slowly redeveloped their relationship, and in time, Draco and little Scorpius grew quite fond of Aunty Andy. Weekends were spent in her company, and Teddy was always there as well. That kind of weekly exposure is hard to ignore, and Teddy and Scorpius eventually fell into a comfortable camaraderie; one they continue to develop working at the Prophet, where Teddy is Scorpius' boss and mentor.

The story of how Scorpius Malfoy became best friends with my sons is just as long, but, in my opinion, way weirder. James and Scorpius, predictably, clashed when they first met. Both were; and, admittedly, still are; strongly House spirited and cocky beyond reasonable…well, reason. There were duels in the hallways, brawls in the Great Hall, a few exploding potions, and one inexplicable "adventure" in the Forbidden Forest that neither of them will talk about. Ever.

Hogwarts, under the strict rule of Professor McGonagall, does not condone such behavior. Their actions landed them, and sometimes innocent bystanders, in multiple detentions. Per week. It got to the point that Draco Malfoy and I were required to meet with McGonagall almost every Saturday. Needless to say, it was not comfortable. For anyone.

The culmination of their rivalry took place in the Slytherin vs. Gryffindor match in Scorpius' second year and James' third. Fiercely competitive, and not always the most rational thinkers, the two boys were marking each other rather closely throughout the entire match. Elbows were thrown freely, along with curses (the verbal, not magical, kind), and both found themselves nearly thrown off their mounts on more than one occasion.

The match ended early, for them anyway, when James was in possession of the Quaffle and was speeding up the field. Scorpius, in an attempt to stop him, flew straight at him from the opposite direction. Neither being the type to back away from a challenge, no matter how ridiculous or potentially dangerous, it quickly became a high speed game of chicken.

The resulting collision did not have a winner.

As they lay recovering in the Hospital Wing, a grudging respect developed between the ex- adversaries. The boys wasted little time in establishing their new friendship and began working their schemes right there in their hospital beds. It seemed that playing up the other's injuries to attract the sympathy and attention of cute girls worked to their advantage and brought them together. Who would have thought your enemy would be your best wingman?

Fortunately for Professor McGonagall and the school's damages budget, the fights were over. They found "forgive and forget" much easier advice to follow than I had at their age.

Al, who was going through an unfortunate phase in which he hero-worshipped his elder brother (one that thankfully did not last too long), asked no questions about this new friendship, immediately accepting James' new friend as one of his own. James and Scorpius were lucky he did because Albus is clearly the most intelligent of the group. Sure, James and Scorpius are no lack-wits, but they needed Al to help make sure they came up with plans, schemes, and pranks that were feasible and less likely to get them detention. All in all, the teachers at Hogwarts had to put up with a lot.

I'm so proud.

Fast-forward nine years, and you'll find all three boys sitting at my kitchen table with my daughter, Lily, and me at 11:30 in the morning. All of us are clutching steaming mugs of tea, making small talk, and waiting patiently for everyone else to show up. It is five months until the wedding, so the wedding party, plus the Bride's grandmother and me, are getting together at noon to go over the plan for the next few months.

You're probably wondering why I'm here if I'm not part of the wedding party. Well, it's because godfather of the Groom is an important role.

And I'm paying for most of it.

And to keep an eye on my sons.

And this is my house.

And Molly is bringing over lunch for us, and I don't want to miss that. No one would.

We just began questioning Lily about her next match with the Harpies when we were interrupted by a thundering crash. We all looked up at the ceiling, waiting for some sign of where it came from. I've spent enough time sleeping in the same room as Ron to recognize the sounds of someone falling off a bed.

It's silent up there for a few moments, then what sounds like clomping, a pause, a door slamming, and loud footsteps coming closer. Then, we hear the unmistakable sound of someone coming down the stairs, slipping, and accidentally riding the last few steps down. Al and James snicker, Lily rolls her eyes, and I smile because we all (except for Scorpius) know that Rose has never been the most coordinated in the morning.

She comes into view a moment later, sliding on her socks in a surprisingly graceful manner, stops purposefully in front of the refrigerator (I don't care if there are magical means to keep food cold, I have a refrigerator because I think kitchens feel empty without them), and buries her hooded head deep inside without looking around to see if she's alone. She fumbles around, picks up the orange juice, opens it up, and takes a swig right from the carton.

At this blatant disregard for common courtesy, Lily decides to bring Rose's attention to the presence of other people in the room. Clearing her throat, she says loudly and pointedly, "Good morning, Rose."

Not bothering to turn around, Rose merely grunts, "Morning," and continues to rummage around for something to eat. Albus and James, who are used to their sister's habits recognize the look on her face and realize what is coming next. Being the awful cousins they are, they smirk at each other and choose to let their sister berate Rose for her rude behavior. I guess amusement means more to them than preventing morning spats. Scorpius, who has never seen Rose and Lily interact this early in the day, is regarding the scene with a mixture of interest and boredom.

It's a very contradictory look.

Trying not to lose her cool, Lily smiles tightly and addresses Rose again, "Rose, we have company."

Straightening up and briefly abandoning her search, Rose turns around, and we get our first good look at her. If I had not already known she just woke up, it would be obvious just looking at her. She's wearing comfortable looking athletic shorts and a wrinkled sleep tank with a zip-up hoodie thrown over it, and the hood is up. Her tangled red hair hangs messily about her face, and the sleep is still evident in the corners of her eyes. To top it all off, one sock is pulled up to mid-calf while the other has scrunched down around her ankle. In other words, she's looked better.

She takes in the five of us sitting at the table: James and I on either end; Al, on his brother's right with his back to her; Lily, sitting next to me and across from an empty chair; and Scorpius, who's leaning in his chair between James and Lily. She peers at us in silence for a few seconds, looks Scorpius in the eye, nods at him and says, "Hey," then turns around again and resumes digging through the refrigerator drawers.

Before I go any further, I think it's important to explain something about my daughter. She may be a professional Quidditch player, but she is always put together and cannot tolerate when other people are not equally concerned with how they look. Especially when "company" is over. To her, it's one thing if you want to look bad when you're alone, but when people are around, at least some effort needs to be made. I don't know where this characteristic came from, but it most definitely was not me. I thought she would be used to Rose ignoring her by now, especially since she lived the first 17 years of her life with her brothers and me, but I think she's hoping she will have better luck with Rose. Between you and me, it's not likely.

Not quite ready to give Rose up as a lost hope, she tries again: "Don't you want to change?"

We see the back of her head tilt downward as she looks at herself and asks, "Why?"

Lily closes her eyes in exasperation and explains, "You're wearing your pajamas."

"So?"

"Aren't you embarrassed that so many people will see you in what you wore to sleep? Eight more people will be here any second, and you might want to look more presentable," she told Rose slowly. "Besides I'm sure you didn't want Scorpius to see you in such a state."

Grabbing an apple and closing the refrigerator, Rose walks toward the empty chair across from Lily and addresses her, "What do you want me to do, Lil? Squeal and run back up stairs to brush my teeth, put on make-up, and dab on a few gallons of perfume? What's the point? He's already seen me. The damage is done." She slouches down in the chair, pulls it closer to the table, and continues, "Besides, Malfoy hardly counts as 'company.' I see him every day at work, and on the days I don't work, he's constantly hanging around the Doofus Brothers here," she gestures at James and Al, "I find it hard to avoid my cousins. Especially since there are so many of them."

Before Lily can reply, Al looks over at Rose and says calmly, "I'm not a doofus."

She looks back at him, takes a bite of her apple, puts her free hand on his arm, and apologizes, "I'm sorry. You're right."

He nods and turns back to his tea. James exclaims indignantly, "I'm not a doofus either."

Rose merely looks at him, raises her eyebrows, and takes another bite of apple.

Scorpius and I make eye contact and try not to laugh.

Lily, irritated at being ignored, tries to steer conversation in her desired direction once again. "Victoire will be here any minute, Rose. Don't you think she'll feel more comfortable with you being her bridesmaid if you look the part?"

"Victoire chose me to be her bridesmaid because she loves me, not because I look like one. Look, if it will make you feel better, I'll take my hood off," and she sweeps it off her head. James, Al, and Scorpius burst out laughing, and Rose turns to look at her reflection in the window. Catching sight of the warzone that is her hair, she inspects it with a critical eye and says, "I may have looked less frightening with it on." She shrugs, not bothering to replace her hood, and takes another huge bite of her apple with a satisfyingly crunchy sound.

"You should do something about that before Gran gets here," Lily warns. "If you don't, she'll attack you with a comb." My sons, who had inherited my messy hair, cringe with me. It's not a pleasant experience.

Rose, however, looked unconcerned: "Good. Then I won't have to do it myself."

Lily opened her mouth to reply, but Rose cut her off before she could say anything, "Lily, just drop it. I can't bring myself to care this early in the morning" – she ignores Scorpius' snort and mumbled, "Noon is hardly morning" – "and it's not like I'm dressed indecently. Give it a rest."

Lily huffs, but lets it go. She may give Rose a hard time about her personal fashion and upkeep habits, but they really are quite good friends. We lapse into verbal silence. The only sounds are the occasional chomp of an apple and the incessant tapping of James's wand on the table.

Clearly bored with the proceedings he's looking at each of us in turn, waiting with increasing impatience for one of us to say something remotely interesting. Everyone here is used to this tactic, and the silence quickly turns into the Let's-Test-James'-Self-Control Game.

James is one of those people that gets antsy when things are too quiet. Being an Auror and accomplished Master of Mischief, he understands that silence is an important ingredient when conducting a raid on a criminal den or when sneaking into Professor Longbottom's quarters to retrieve a confiscated and magically altered/enhanced Extendable Ears, but he can't stand silence that seems to serve no purpose.

More logical people would simply take the initiative and start talking themselves; James, however, has never been one that puts much stock in logic. He prefers to wait until someone else does it.

Why? Who knows? Most would think he's afraid people will think he talks too much and get annoyed (Unlikely. I think he enjoys when people consider him an annoyance).

Maybe he is genuinely interested in what other people have to say (Probably not. If he cared, he would just ask directly).

Most likely, he trying to win some competition that he made up in his head and no one else knows they are a part of. It seems that there is only one rule: first one to speak loses.

The rest of us have caught on to his made up competition and gang up on him to make sure he can't win. It normally doesn't take long. James has about as much patience as Uncle Vernon waiting for his bacon.

Albus and Scorpius, who live with the idiot, are clearly experts at this game. They make discreet eye contact while James is busy staring at Lily and begin to establish their plan.

Scorpius starts the negotiation by leaning one elbow on the table and his head on his fist. He lets out a huge, and fake, yawn and rubs the corner of his eye with one finger. Glancing at James to make sure he's still staring at his sister, Al shakes his head and casually taps two fingers on the table, slowly points his thumb at himself, then taps one finger on the table. Scorpius look at Al with furrowed brows for a moment, gives a quick nod, then leans back in his chair and crosses his arms.

Roles have been established.

Al smirks and digs around in his pocket for his wand, preparing to commence Stage One: Distraction. Pointing the wand at his brother, Al sends a slow stream of bubbles toward James' face, where they burst with a light popping noise and what I'm sure is an irritating tickling sensation. Though this tactic does not cause James to speak, it successfully draws his attention away from his pathetic attempt to break me.

What a foolish boy. No one can break me.

While Albus distracts James, Rose flicks her apple stem at Scorpius to get his attention. It bounces off the side of his nose, and, for a second, I think Scorpius is going to be the one to break the silence. He controls himself, however, and looks at her with wide eyes that say, What are you doing? I'm trying to think here!

She rolls her eyes back at him in exasperation, then gets serious. Leaning one arm on the back of her chair, she taps it with her thumb and looks pointedly at James.

Following her gaze, Scorpius turns to look at James, then back at Rose in confusion.

Shaking her head at his dimness, she taps her chair again, nods her head at James, then points forcefully at the ground.

Scorpius looks at her like she's lost her mind, but turns back to James and looks at the ground like she suggested anyway. He stares at the legs of James' chair blankly for a few seconds before he realizes what it is he is supposed to be seeing: James has tilted his chair onto its back legs in a fruitless attempt to get out of bubble range.

He's in a prime position to enact Rose's plan. Nodding his understanding to her, he quickly hooks his foot around the nearest leg of James' already wobbly chair and gives a forceful upward thrust.

Perfect.

What little balance James had tumbles to the ground with his chair and lands in a loudly cursing heap on the floor. James lies sprawled on the floor as the rest of us laugh at the look on his face when he fell. Lily is laughing so hard that she's hiccupping. The laughter seems to make James realize that he's lost the Silent Game, and the realization makes him swear even louder. That boy is lucky his Grandmother is not here yet.

While my children watch their brother struggle to his feet and fall a few times in the process, I see Scorpius turn to Rose and wink at her.

To my surprise, she smiles back at him.

I have no time to ponder this strange behavior though because eight more people have just landed in my fireplace.

"Hello everyone! How are you this fine morning?" Teddy greeted cheerfully as he ducked out of the fireplace and dusted himself off. "Sorry we're a little late. Victoire here couldn't decide how to do her hair. JSP, why are you on the floor?"

The kitchen filled with noise as we all simultaneously returned his salutations and Scorpius got up to help Molly carry all the food she brought. Introductions were made as breakfast was distributed, Al hitting his brother in the face with a piece of toast.

"Family," Teddy addressed us, gesturing to the burly young man to his right, "This is my best mate and Best Man, Tony Matthews. Tony, these goofballs are my family: my godfather Harry; my "cousin" Rose; my fake sister Lily; the idiots Al and James; and their best friend, my cousin Scorpius." We each nodded as we were mentioned, James even going as far as bowing. Teddy and Tony took sat down in the chairs Rose conjured, and Victoire took over the introductions.

"I know we were a bit older than you, but you may recognize my best friends from Hogwarts: Katie Wilson," the small brunette waved shyly, "and Sadie Witherspoon," the leggy, blond looked less than thrilled to be here. "Of course, you already know my siblings," Victoire continued, lightly elbowing her ash covered brother, Louis, and sister, Dominque.

Once everyone had settled in their chairs, except for Molly who was busy making sure everyone was eating enough ("Louis, I made sure I brought extra potatoes because I know they're your favorite. Have some more, honey. Lily, darling, make sure you have one of the oranges. You need more fruit in your diet, young lady. Scorpius, dear, you've gotten much too thin. Has James been eating all the food at your place? Don't be shy, eat up!"), Victoire got down to business.

"Ok, everyone, I know there are still about 5 months until the wedding, but there is still so much to do! We're going to go over the schedule of events before the wedding in a minute, but Teddy and I would like to thank you for agreeing to be a part of this process," she smiled dazzlingly around the table. "I know the wedding party is on the larger side, but you're all so important to us, and we're hoping you can help us with the planning."

Taking a large bite from a sausage, Teddy whispered loudly to Scorpius, "The wedding party would have been smaller, but Victoire said it wasn't fair to make Al a groomsman without making James one too. The lady insisted. What could I do?"

James didn't verbally retaliate, but casually tipped Teddy's juice glass into his lap. Ignoring the swearing of her fiancé as his pants soaked up the liquid, Victoire raised her voice a little and began detailing the schedule for the next few months: engagement party, dress and robe shopping, dance lessons (I wasn't really looking forward to those), more shopping, fitting appoints, rehearsals, and those were only the ones I remembered. The list went on. I don't remember doing half this stuff for my own wedding!

As Victoire went over the notes her mother had made to share with the rest of them, my children and their friends started gradually losing interest. In fact, only Molly and Victoire's school friends seemed to be paying any attention to what was being said. James resumed stuffing his face with bacon and cinnamon rolls. Lily was examining her nails, looking for some flaw that wasn't there. Teddy was gazing at Victoire; she had his full attention, but he was obviously not listening to a word she spoke. Tony was leaning back in his seat, staring at the ceiling, and twirling his wand carelessly in his fingers. Rose put her arm on the table and rested her head in the crook of her elbow, hoping to catch a little bit more sleep. Taking advantage of her inattention, Scorpius was ripping off small pieces of his schedule, wadding them into little balls, and flicking them into Rose's hair. What is he, 5-years-old?

Al, who was watching his friend with an exasperated expression, noticed me watching. Smirking, he shook his head and rolled his eyes before fighting his brother for the last piece of bacon.

I continued to watch as it began to look like Rose had a horrible case of dandruff. One paper ball bounced off her cheek, but she didn't wake. Instead, she batted her hand in front of her face like she was trying to ward off the wrakspurts, then settled back into a comfortable position. I smiled at her fondly. It was cute.

It was then that I noticed the barrage of paper missiles had ceased. I looked to Scorpius in puzzlement. The look on his face was one I didn't recognize, but it kind of felt like I should. It's for this reason that I make a note to observe the two of them throughout the wedding process. It should be good practice. Work is a bit boring at the moment. It's rare that I get to put my Auror skills to such a fun and unproductive use.

They'll never see me coming.

Should be fun.

A/N: Sorry the chapter was so long. I promise that most won't be quite as lengthy. There was just a lot of background information that I wanted to clear up.

Please let me know what you think.