Disclaimer: I do not own, Death Note, nor Batman, nor the Joker. All names of ordinary victims here are completely from my head; any similarities with real people is purely coincidental.
Note: This takes place sometime after Kira's downfall.
Note: Please review. I need any form of feedback.
Chapter 1: The Sickest Man Alive
"Wahahahahahahahaha!! You'll never catch me coppers!"
The Clown Prince of Crime, the Joker, sped down a lane in a stolen police car. His head was sticking out of the driver's window insanely as he laughed maniacally. Behind him, the police of Gotham City gave chase. On the passenger seat beside him a policeman lay dead with a huge grin on his face. The victim of his deadly smile gas.
He had picked the perfect time to do a bank robbery. His arch foe, the Batman, was busy stopping a wide-scale plan of the Penguin that night, and he knew it. He took advantage of the timing and raided a bank. His lackeys had already been either killed or captured, but the Joker had managed to slip away with the loot.
He turned a corner at high speed, nearly turning his car over. As he did, he tossed a huge "homemade" grenade out his window. As the police followed, the grenade exploded, taking out one of the police cars. The car directly behind it crashed into it, while the others managed to steer around it in time.
"Aww. I was hoping for a good pile of cars with that," the Joker said to himself.
He sped onward in his hijacked car. Suddenly, a group of police cars came out of nowhere and formed a barricade ahead of him. Thinking quickly, the Joker found a ramp that might be able to launch him over them. He aimed for the ramp and went at full speed. He successfully took off, and his car went flying through the air.
"So long suckers!! Ahahahahahahaha--waah!!"
The landing, however, was not as successful. His car hit the ground head first and crashed on the concrete road.
"Be careful men, there's no telling what this guy'll do now that he's cornered," said the leader of the police as they approached the wreckage with gas masks.
A man jumped out of the wreckage with the appearance of the Joker.
"Shoot him men! Don't give him a chance to do anything!"
The police fired at him, unleashing many rounds of lead. But the man still stood.
The police advanced. They soon saw that this man was not the Joker, but his victim, wearing make up applied by the Joker and supported by a strange girdle-splint hybrid mechanism that allowed the dead man to stand.
The surprise of the police quickly turned to terror when they discovered a huge time bomb strapped on the corpse's back.
BOOOOOOM!!
The officers were wiped out in a ball of flame. One, however, survived the blast and saw the Joker peeking out of a nearby alley. He must have went there when the police were occupied with his decoy.
The Joker retreated into the narrow alley. The policeman followed him.
The lone policeman entered the dark alley bravely. It less than three feet wide. He kept on his guard and held up his handgun with one hand, ready to shoot. With his other hand, he took out a flashlight and switched it on. He scanned the alley and found two large bags full of money, but could not find the fugitive.
He heard a soft thud behind him and quickly turned around. The Joker had hidden above him by mounting both legs on the walls. Before the officer could shoot, the Joker swiftly snatched away his gun, pulled off his gas mask then covered his mouth with one hand.
"Now I see why Batsy likes using that sneaky trick," the Clown Prince of Crime said, holding the gun close to the poor man's face.
He tossed away the gun and produced a grenade.
"Eat this!" he said as he forced the shocked policeman to open his mouth and rammed it in. He then strapped the grenade with duct tape.
More police sirens could be heard outside the alley. Reinforcements were about to march in to apprehend the criminal. The Joker pulled the helpless man closer to his ever-smiling face.
"We don't want your friends to miss out on all the fun, now do we?" he said before he pulled the ring off the grenade, priming it.
He pushed the officer out of the alley as more police approached. Both were in astonishment as they met each other, but that moment of surprise did not last long, just 10 seconds.
BANG!!
The Joker calmly picked up his bags of money and walked towards the other end of the alley as the police that chased him were blown to pieces. Suddenly, he heard a gunshot and dodged a bullet from the direction he faced. Officers now cut off his path on either side.
"Shoot! More cops," the Joker said as he dropped his loot and took out a pair of what looked like big toy guns.
Each gun actually held a small bomb. The Joker fired these in both directions, killing many police officers. Knowing that more would come for him, he climbed into the window of a building, which was abandoned. He felt no remorse in leaving his ill-gotten money behind, for it was not greed that drove his actions.
It was insanity.
This was a man who found happiness in just watching things burn. He was the sickest man on the face of the Earth.
He ascended to the second floor. As he did, he passed a bum and cruelly sprayed him with deadly smile gas.
This man was truly evil.
He looked out the window and saw that the SWAT team were now coming for him. They were led by two police sergeants who wore no masks. These were two of several police officers which the Joker knew by name.
While the Joker thought about his next move, he heard a soft plop. He turned to where the sound came from and found a black notebook. Out of curiosity, he picked it up and opened it, holding up a small flashlight. There were some words in English written on the back of the cover, which read "DEATH NOTE" in white letters:
DEATH NOTE
How to use it
1. The human whose name is written in this note shall die.
2. This note will not take effect unless the writer has the person's face in their mind when writing his/her name. Therefore, people sharing the same name will not be affected.
3. If the cause of death is written within 40 seconds of writing the person's name, it will happen.
4. If the cause of death is not specified, the person will simply die of a heart attack.
5. After writing the cause of death, details of the death should be written in the next 6 minutes and 40 seconds.
"Is this for real?" the Joker said.
"Joker, come out with your hands up! We have the place surrounded!" one of the sergeants said over a megaphone.
The Joker took out a ballpen. "It's worth a try," he said, writing down the sergeant's name in the Note. "I need a new gag anyway."
He peered from the edge of the window and checked his wristwatch, which had a grotesque picture of a clown grinning from ear to ear. It might as well have been a self portrait of himself.
10 seconds passed.
"You have one minute to submit yourself, Joker!" The sergeant called.
"Well you have 40 seconds, if this thing actually works," the Joker whispered.
20 seconds.
"If you do not surrender willingly, we will have no other choice but to use force."
30 seconds.
"Come out Joker! There's nowhere to run!"
35 seconds.
"Joker, don't make this any difficult for yourself than it already—ugh!"
40 seconds had now passed, and the sergeant now clutched his chest in pain.
He was now having a heart attack. And within moments, the officer died.
"Wahahahahahahahahahaha!! That was just splendid!" The Joker yelled. "Hmm, let's try something else."
He wrote the following on a page of the Death Note:
Oscar Stanford: dies of a heart attack with a giant smile on his face. He orders his subordinates not to take any action, at all, and enters the building to negotiate with an insane, dangerous and devilishly handsome criminal. He orders the SWAT team surrounding the building to take of their masks and helmets and line up before the said criminal's window. Then, he names each and every one of the cops, from left to right. Finally, he dies out of their view.
Oscar Stanford was the name of the remaining sergeant. And he did, in fact, know the names of every man in the SWAT team.
The sergeant watched sadly as his dead comrade was taken away.
"Men, stand down!" he ordered the team that was now about to raid the structure. "I will try to negotiate with this man. No one acts unless I say so!"
He entered the building and bravely climbed up to where the Joker waited.
"Hello Mr. Stanford!" the Joker said cheerfully. "Mighty brave of you to come up here all alone."
"I just don't want anymore people to die," the sergeant said. "I know you killed my partner somehow. But we should get to that later. Right now, let's just talk things out."
"All I want right now sir, are the names of the SWAT members around this building," the Joker said. "And I want them to line up outside, in front of this window, and tell them to remove their masks and helmets. Don't forget to tell me who's who."
The sergeant gave in, reluctantly. He ordered the men to remove their head gear and line up in front of the Joker's window. There were 15 men in all. The sergeant then named each one of the confused troops from left to right.
He was completely following the will of the Death Note.
As the sergeant narrated the full names of the men while pointing at their respective faces, the Joker followed while writing them on his Note.
When the sergeant had finished, he turned to the Joker.
"Why did you want me to do this?" he asked.
The Joker closed the Note in his hands. "I'm just bored I guess," he said. "Now go over to the other side of the room and kick the bucket, will you?"
Oscar Stanford's body suddenly began to move on it's own. It was as if he had been possessed by some evil force. He now followed the last sentence written on the note under his name.
He grasped his chest vainly as he died of a heart attack out of his subordinates' line of sight. When he fell to the ground and let out one last breath, he did so with a large, gruesome grin on his face.
A moment later, as the SWAT team outside met the same end, the Joker let out one long, loud, insane laugh.