What Happens in LA Stays in LA
Nick watched the sunset; his bare feet planted in the beach and feeling the last rays of sun hit his bare arms. He had just spent a great weekend in LA with both his kids, thanks to their mothers both being cooperative. For once, things had worked out well for him.
Olivia had told him about the law enforcement conference that would be taking place in LA and suggested that as she had been told to send someone, he could go, and spend some time with Zara while he was there. He had jumped at the chance, and taken Friday off work so he could get to LA, check in to his hotel and then collect Zara in time for dinner. Cynthia had agreed that Gil could join his father for the weekend too, and after Nick had offered to pay the plane fare, she had let Gil travel alone, putting him on the plane at San Diego at her end, and Nick collecting him once he arrived at LAX. They had done the reverse for the journey back Sunday afternoon, and then Nick had dropped Zara back home, before having a walk along the beach to enjoy the last of the sun. He wanted to make the most of it as it was still cold in New York, although spring was finally showing signs of starting.
He contemplated the day, and then thought forward to his week ahead. He wasn't expecting anything too exciting about the conference, although there was one day that was concentrating on Special Victims, with not only police, but lawyers who would be emphasizing the difficulties and potential problems that were inherent with these cases. Most of the rest would be general procedures and protocols. The brass were happy that Nick was going, as he was considered one of the loose cannons of SVU, and someone they felt could do with a brush-up on his general skills.
Nick thought about whether he had the guts to do the other thing he had contemplated while he was out of town. He had been alone for some time now, having broken things off with Amanda, and he was feeling frustrated. He also wanted something different. Although he generally considered himself heterosexual, there had been occasions in his life where he had experimented with men, and found it satisfying, especially when he wanted a one night stand and was feeling particularly horny, as he was now. Of course, working as part of the SVU in New York meant that he wouldn't even consider going anywhere he could scratch an itch there, as it was far too likely to come back and bite him on the ass later. He had visited too many of the gay clubs as part of his job to make it possible to go there in his personal life. It was also far too risky to try and find someone outside these usual channels, and he wasn't going to try and hook up via the Internet either, having seen what TARU could do. So he felt he could only scratch this itch when he was out of town.
Nick sighed as the last rays of sun disappeared behind the calm sea, and darkness descended. He headed back to the rental car, having put on his sweatshirt and sandals when he left the beach. Time to find dinner and a beer or two before settling down for the night in his hotel. He was in LA until next weekend. He had an early start so would consider going to a club another evening.
After a few very boring days at the conference, Nick had had enough. He needed to get out, have some excitement, and if he was honest with himself, get laid. The next day was the Special Victims day at the conference, and as it was aimed at law enforcement officers who didn't work in that field all day, he could afford to be tired, and probably hung over, and might be able to sneak off to have a nap if necessary. In the meantime he was going stir crazy and needed a change.
So he put on his tightest jeans, a sleeveless t-shirt and his leather jacket, and then headed out. He had done some research and picked where to go – a hot club that according to the reviews he found, stuck to the rules so they didn't get raided, and had an active back room. It was just what he wanted.
He caught a cab to a bar a few blocks away and had a beer in there first before heading to the club. He hadn't wanted the cab driver to know where he was going. It was probably a bit paranoid of him, but he'd rather not take risks. When he got inside, he got himself another drink before settling against a back wall to watch what was happening. The lights flashed brightly on the dance floor, to match the very loud music, and there were men of all types there, drinking, dancing, and making out. There were a variety of ages and ethnicities, so Nick didn't feel out of place. He finished his beer then looked around. Although a few men had approached him, none had particularly attracted him, and really, he didn't want to have to get into long conversations with anyone, he just wanted to get off.
He decided to go and investigate the back room. That would be where all the action would take place, and he could probably get what he wanted there without meeting anyone in the bar first. He felt tired, so the sooner he could get what he wanted, the sooner he could get back to his bed. He was starting to realize he was too old for clubbing during the week.
Nick entered the very dimly lit back room area, and was immediately overcome with the sounds and smells of men having sex. It was difficult to see much due to the lack of lighting, with only flashes of light making it into the room from the main club area, but he could feel himself getting aroused just using his imagination. An arm grabbed him and turned him around and he was groped through his trousers, but when he caught sight of the man, he wasn't what Nick was looking for. Yes he wanted to get off, but not with just anyone. He pulled away and moved further into the room.
A few muttered words in Spanish were coming from the wall to the left of Nick, so he headed in that direction. Someone moved and he caught sight of a face, one that looked familiar to him. He felt a bolt of electricity go through him. Of course it was his imagination and the lighting, as there was no way that ADA Barba was even in LA, never mind in this nightclub, but the suggestion that it could be him was enough for Nick. He had always been attracted to Barba, and this had fueled his animosity towards him, as he didn't like the constant reminder of the hidden side to his sexuality.
Nick got to the Barba look-a-like, who was turned away from him; he couldn't see the man's face. That was okay with him as he didn't want the fantasy that it was Barba ruining. Nick put one arm around him and murmured in Spanish that he wanted to fuck him. The man didn't turn around, but did nod and murmur "Si" in return. Nick started to undo his jeans and push them down to his knees, and could tell the man in front of him was doing the same. He was shorter than Nick, which just reinforced the fantasy that it actually was Barba that was with him. Nick rolled on a condom he had brought with him and got out a small tube of lube too. He opened it and coated two fingers then found the man's entrance and thrust both fingers in, hard. He wasn't in the mood for gentle tonight. He heard a groan and some curses in Spanish, but the man opened up, and thrust his hips backwards, further onto Nick's fingers. He was obviously experienced in this which was good as Nick didn't want to wait and do a lot of prep. Nick removed his fingers and then lubed up the outside of the condom before moving behind the man and thrusting inside. He wrapped his arms around the shorter man and they set up a quick rhythm, and Nick very quickly managed to find the man's prostate and was hitting it on every stroke.
Nick could feel himself getting close to orgasm much too quickly, so slowed down a bit, and buried his head in the man's shoulder. He could smell the man's cologne, which again reminded him of Barba. He didn't know what the smell was, but he had smelt it on the ADA, or something similar at least. The man grabbed one of Nick's hands and dragged it down to his groin, and Nick realized that he wasn't doing anything for his partner in this. He took hold of the very hard cock he could feel there and stroked it, the lube still on his hand making it slide easily. The man muttered his thanks, and then groaned. Again, to Nick it sounded like Barba, although it was very difficult to hear anything much with the music of the bar and the sounds of all the other men all around them.
Just then, the man turned his head towards Nick, and their eyes met. Both froze as they recognized each other. It was Barba, impossible as that was, and the fact that he had recognized Nick too was confirmation enough. Nick was too close to stop though, especially now he knew that his fantasy had come to life. He ground his hips forward and Barba gasped, before joining him in moving again. It didn't take long for them to get their rhythm back, but this time they hadn't broken eye contact, and were both watching each other's reactions. Barba came first, and the clenching around Nick's cock as well as the feeling of semen on his hand set Nick off. They both collapsed against each other for a few seconds while they got their breath back, then Nick pulled his arms from around Barba and withdrew. He removed the condom, and then used a few tissues in his pocket to clean up his hand and threw them and the condom away in a nearby trashcan. He avoided eye contact with the ADA, who had turned round and was redressing himself. Nick did the same then they both stood there awkwardly. Nick knew he couldn't avoid it any longer and looked up, just as Barba grabbed his arm and told him "Come on, we need to talk, and not here."
Nick followed Barba out of the club, noticing how good he looked in the tight jeans and t-shirt he was wearing. He had so rarely seen the ADA out of his work suits that it was a shock to see him like that, although most of the men there, including himself, were similarly attired. Barba led them to a sports bar a few blocks away. A game was playing in the background but neither of them paid any attention to it. Barba went to the bar and waited to be served while Nick excused himself. There was no way he was having this conversation with Barba's semen still on his hand. Tissues had got rid of the worst of it, but not all. Nick also wanted a minute alone to think about what had happened.
He washed his hands slowly, and then dried them, trying to think of anything other than how good it had felt to be inside Barba, and feel his cock in his hand, and his body next to his own. The only good thing about the situation was that they both had something to lose here, so there was no way Barba would be ratting him out. He sighed and headed back to the bar. He couldn't avoid this any longer. He found Barba sitting in a corner away from the crowds watching the TV and joined him, thanking the ADA for the scotch he had bought and taking a large swig.
The silence got awkward, so Nick decided to ask the most innocuous question he could think of. "So what are you doing here in LA?"
Barba took a sip of his own drink before looking up at Nick. "Last minute replacement. The SVU ADA who was meant to be speaking tomorrow at the conference is ill, so they asked me to fill in. I got here this afternoon. I knew you were here, of course, but didn't expect to see you until tomorrow."
Nick laughed. "Yeah, I bet that was a shock. Of all the clubs in LA, we both pick the same one to go to at the same time and happen to bump into each other there, despite the number of people there. What are the odds?"
Barba snorted. "I know. Pretty unlikely, but it happened. So what do we do about it?"
Nick looked at him. "Forget about it?" he queried. "Obviously neither of us is out and we work together, so I think the best thing to do is pretend it never happened."
Barba looked at him for a second then nodded. "Fine. Denial all the way. It works for me."
Nick looked at him, with his eyebrows raised. "Denial? What do you mean?"
Barba looked at him contemptuously. "You can slink back into your happy heterosexual world and pretend you don't like fucking men. I won't tell anyone."
Nick could feel the anger rising in him and made an effort to keep his voice down. "Hold on a minute. I am not doing anything wrong here. I'm not in a relationship. I'm not denying anything or pretending to be something I'm not. I like women, and occasionally I like men too. I've always been monogamous, and have never done anything with a man when I've been in a relationship."
"Really? So all those years you were married, and Maria was overseas or you were undercover, you never decided to get a bit of cock on the side, and rationalized it away as not being unfaithful?" Barba glared at Nick.
Nick returned his glare. His hand curled into a fist. He so wanted to punch Barba now. "No I didn't. I'm not one of those men, and if you think I would do that, you don't know me very well. What happened in my marriage has nothing to do with this or you. God, what happened to you that you think the worst of other people?"
Barba sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Nick was right. He had never given the impression that he was anything but honest and faithful with his partners. It was just that finding out this supposedly straight man liked other men that made him see red. "I'm sorry, you're right. I shouldn't judge you or make assumptions." He finished his drink and started to stand up.
Nick stopped him with a hand on his arm. "So why did you?" he asked in a much gentler voice. He was shocked that Barba had apologized to him.
Barba didn't make eye contact with Nick, but decided to be honest with him. "I was in a relationship with a man who worked out of town a lot. It was one of my first relationships, and I was serious about him. It never occurred to me to not trust him. I found out later that he was married with two kids, and I was just a bit on the side. He told me that he was faithful to his wife, and I didn't count."
Nick could hear the hurt in Barba's voice, even though this had obviously been a long time ago. He could see why Barba had gone off the deep end now. "I'm not him. I wouldn't do that."
Barba nodded. "I know you wouldn't. I do know you well enough to know that. I think I just assume the worst about people now to protect myself from getting hurt again." There was silence for a minute. "Do you want another drink – I'm going to the bar."
"Yes, thanks, but it's my round," Nick answered.
Barba waved him off. "Forget it. I owe you after laying into you like that." He headed off towards the bar, and Nick watched him, contemplating their exchange. He always thought of Barba as only being the man he saw at work- brash, arrogant, and very confident. They really hadn't had much conversation outside work, and certainly nothing as personal as this. He decided he liked seeing the vulnerable side of the ADA.
Barba came back with their drinks, and Nick murmured his thanks. They sat in silence, and then Barba asked "So I assume you did the same as me, and decided that while out of town you could…indulge in pleasures that are too risky in New York."
Nick nodded. "Yeah. As you've pointed out, most of my adult life I've been in relationships, and I'm happy with women most of the time. It's only occasionally I get the urge for something different, so it doesn't bother me most of the time. What about you? I've never heard anything about you on the romantic grapevine at work."
Barba smirked. "Good. I aim to keep it that way. To be honest, my work consumes most of my life, and I haven't had much time for anything else in recent years. Plus as you've seen, I'm good at keeping people at a distance so I don't get hurt. That isn't conducive to a relationship, so I've been alone for a long time. I make the most of opportunities to indulge when I'm out of town though."
"So your preference is for men then?" Nick asked.
"Yes, although I have had relationships with women, as you've no doubt gathered from what you have heard about my past at work."
Nick nodded in confirmation. "That's what I thought. It must have been a shock when you realized it was me there in the club. Had you seen me before, or did you have no idea who it was until you turned round?"
Barba smirked. "Obviously I could tell it was someone who spoke Spanish, but other than that, I had no idea. It was a shock, considering I thought you were straight. How about you? Did you realize who I was before that point? You were the one that approached me."
Nick squirmed. He now realized he shouldn't have started this line of questioning. "It was very dark in there and I thought you were in New York, so I didn't know it was you."
Barba picked up on the signs that Nick was uncomfortable with this question, so decided to probe further. "What made you approach me then?"
Nick looked down at his drink and then took a sip before answering. "I heard the Spanish."
Barba used the silence to make Nick feel uncomfortable. He could tell there was something he wasn't saying. "So you didn't see me at all?"
Nick shrugged. "I may have caught sight of you, but it was so dark I really couldn't see much. Certainly not enough to realize it actually was you."
"But what you saw was enough to encourage you to approach me. Are you attracted to me then Nick, or is it just that I'm such a pain in your butt at work that you decided you wanted to be a pain in mine for once?" He thought that humor might help reduce the detective's embarrassment.
Nick laughed, grasping on to the excuse Barba had suggested. "Yes, that's it."
Barba could tell differently, from the way Nick was acting, but decided not to probe any further.
Nick wanted to change the subject, so asked Barba about his lecture the next day, and they spent the rest of the evening not referring to what had happened between them.
They shared a cab back to the hotel where the conference was, as both of them were staying there, and then they got in the elevator together to their rooms. Awkwardness descended between them, as they both considered if they should just go their separate ways. Nick looked up when the elevator doors opened on his floor and saw Barba staring at him. "I'm in 12103 if you decide you want a nightcap, Nick." Barba commented.
Nick got out without saying anything, and just nodded. The doors closed, and Nick walked slowly back to his room. He was really tempted take Barba up on his offer, knowing full well it wasn't a drink that was being offered. But now that they knew who each other was, would it make things even more awkward between them? He got to his room and sat on the bed. He wasn't feeling tired, despite the long day, and was feeling horny again, now that he knew what he could have if he wanted it. He finally made a decision.
Nick knocked gently on the door of room 12103, and it only took Barba a couple of seconds to answer, with a smirk on his face. "I thought you weren't coming," he commented. "Couldn't resist me though, could you?"
Nick ignored this and pushed Barba back in the room and against the nearest wall, pushing the door closed with his foot. He grabbed Barba's hair in one fist and tilted his face to meet his own before taking his mouth in a commanding kiss. If he was going to do this, he would do it his way, and he would be in control. Barba gave in immediately, and the kiss changed and grew more gentle as Nick realized Barba wasn't going to fight him. The passion grew between them, and soon their hips were thrusting against each other's as they grew hard.
Barba pushed Nick backwards until his legs hit the bed, and then grabbed his t-shirt, breaking the kiss as he pulled it over Nick's head. He removed his own too, and then ran his hands over the smooth golden muscles he had uncovered. Nick undid his own belt and then started pushing his jeans down, and Barba realized he should be undressing more too, and copied the detective's actions. Soon they were naked in front of each other. They stared at each other, knowing this was the last chance to change their minds, then a smirk started on Barba's face, and he pushed Nick backwards, before joining him on the bed.
They were all over each other, hands grasping and hips grinding against one another. This didn't compare to what they had done in the club. They were naked, on a bed, and both knew who each other were. This was so much hotter than last time. Barba reached into his discarded jeans pocket, coming up with a condom and small tube of lube, and that made Nick pause. Although he had done some stuff with men before, he had always been the one to top when the encounters had gone as far as intercourse. He knew that as Barba had bottomed earlier that night, he should be the one to do so now, but felt uncomfortable about it.
Barba picked up on Nick's reluctance, and stopped. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to," he commented. Both men had worked for too long in sex crimes to consider doing anything without full consent.
"It's not that," Nick said, feeling embarrassed. "I've just never done it before, been on bottom I mean."
Barba shrugged. "You don't have to now, if you don't want to. I can bottom again, or we can do something different. Whatever you're most comfortable with."
"Won't you be sore if you do it again?" Nick queried. He knew enough to know that if Barba hadn't had sex in some time, bottoming twice in one night was likely to leave him uncomfortable the next day. Plus he had been a bit rough earlier.
"Probably, but I can cope with that. Just use lots of lube and be a bit more gentle this time. I've got to sit down on a flight back to JFK tomorrow night."
Nick hesitated for a minute, still not sure it was fair to do this, and then Barba pushed the tube into his hand and undid the condom. He rolled it onto Nick's cock, and then sat straddling the detective's middle. "Come on Nick. We need to get some sleep tonight."
This spurred Nick into action, and he opened the tube and covered his fingers, before using just one this time to circle Barba's hole and then push in gently. He saw a slight grimace on the ADA's face and stopped. "Are you sure about this?"
Barba laughed. "I thought you wanted to be a pain in my backside? Yes I'm sure. I'll be fine. Just get on with it. I'm assuming you're going to make it good for me at some point."
Nick stopped hesitating, and curled his finger and quickly found Barba's prostate. The older man gasped. "Is that what you want, Barba?" he asked.
"Yeah, that's better, although do you think you could not call me by my surname when we're doing this? It reminds me of work, which is not what I want to be thinking about."
"Okay Rafael," Nick agreed, before attacking his prostate repeatedly until the other man slumped forward and groaned. "I'll stop you thinking about work, or anything at all soon." The reaction of the ADA was making him feel more confident, and he slowly added a second finger.
After a few minutes of this, Rafael kneeled up, pulling away from Nick's fingers, and moved further back, taking Nick's hard cock in his hand and holding it upright before sinking down on it slowly. The two men locked eyes as their bodies joined, and Nick tried very hard not to thrust upwards.
Rafael took a deep breath in as he felt Nick's cock sliding into him. He was sore already, but it would be worth it. It's not as if he would get another chance to do this, so he had to take what he could get. He concentrated on relaxing, and then when he felt more comfortable, he raised himself slightly then pushed down again. Nick took the hint and started thrusting up to meet him, and they moved together.
Nick grabbed Rafael's cock, which had softened a bit due to the pain he had been feeling, but soon hardened again at the attention. Rafael moved position slightly until Nick was striking his prostate on every thrust, and they sped up as they approached their peaks. This time it was Nick who came first, thrusting hard into Rafael twice before he stopped, and after a few seconds he managed to start stroking Rafael again. It didn't take long before he came too, shooting ribbons all over Nick's abdomen and chest. He slumped forward, breathing heavily, before slowly pulling off, making sure the condom didn't come off. He didn't want to sleep in a wet patch.
It took a few minutes for both men to recover, and then Nick sat up. He wasn't sure what to do next, but he definitely needed a shower. "Is it okay if I have a quick shower?" he asked Rafael, not making eye contact with him.
"Yeah, go ahead. I'll have one after you," Rafael commented. Nick padded into the bathroom, and the ADA enjoyed watching the view of Nick's retreating figure as he walked out of sight. Rafael sighed. This had been a much better night than he had hoped for. He had always found the detective attractive, so when he had realized that the man fucking him in the club actually was him, it had been a thrill. He hadn't really expected Nick to come up for a repeat performance, now they knew who each other were, but hadn't been able to resist making the offer. He thought about what they had done, and knew that the memories of that night would fuel his fantasies for months.
Nick was trying not to think at all while he was in the shower. He concentrated on getting himself clean as quickly as possible. He didn't know what to do next, never having been in this situation before. Yes he had slept with a work-mate before, but with Amanda it had led to a sort-of relationship, and this thing with Rafael wasn't going to. He just wanted to escape back to his own room and get some sleep.
Nick wrapped a towel around his waist and ran his fingers through his hair before he left the bathroom. Rafael was still lying in the bed. Nick felt his cock twitch again when he looked at the other man. He never would have imagined seeing the ADA like this. Nick walked over to his clothes and started gathering them.
Rafael sat up. "You can stay if you want to, but I understand if you want to go. You've got an earlier start than I have in the morning. I'm just going to get a shower." He suited his actions to his words and padded off into the bathroom, after one last glance at Nick who was stood frozen, still holding his clothes.
When Rafael got out of the shower, he saw Nick sat on the end of the bed, fully dressed. He was disappointed, but had suspected that Nick would leave.
"I'm going to go. As you said, I have an early start. I expect I'll see you later though?" he queried. He knew this was for the best. He could be back in his room in a couple of minutes. Cuddling and sleeping together was for relationships.
Rafael nodded. "Sure. My lecture is at 11 and I'm staying for lunch. My flight back to New York is 5pm. I have a deposition on Friday."
Nick nodded and then walked towards the door. He really didn't know what to say, so decided to say nothing. He opened the door and walked out, with one last look at Rafael, who was stood there in just a towel. He knew he wouldn't see the other man like that again, so had a good look before he left.
Nick had trouble concentrating the next morning. It wasn't just because he had a headache and was tired either. He felt jumpy, knowing he would see Rafael again, and also his mind was tormenting him by replaying what they had done the night before. He also couldn't think of the other man as Barba anymore. The man he had spent the evening before with was Rafael. He tried to separate the two in his mind and lock his memories of Rafael away and stop thinking about them, but failed.
At 11am he was sat in the lecture hall and felt awake for the first time that day, waiting for Rafael to come on stage. He was introduced by the organizer who explained the change in presenter and then gave a quick overview of ADA Barba's career. Then Rafael strode onto the stage, and started his lecture. It was interesting, but Nick knew most of the cases that he was using to highlight his points, having worked them himself. Instead, he concentrated on watching the man, seeing how well his suit fitted him, and when he took off his jacket as the room was so warm, he admired his ass which was emphasized by the suspenders which pulled his pants tight. All Nick could think of was the previous night and what he had done to that well-shaped ass.
Nick took a gulp of his coffee. He had hoped that seeing Rafael in a work environment and wearing his usual suit would have made Rafael retreat and Barba come back, so Nick could concentrate. It hadn't worked though. He gave up trying and just enjoyed the view.
Rafael knew Nick was somewhere in the audience, and could feel his eyes on him, but couldn't tell from where. He could only see the front rows due to the lights in the lecture theatre, so had no way to see where Nick was sitting. He could feel the detective in every step he took though, and definitely every time he sat down. He was pretty sore from last night, although still considered it worth every second. He tried to concentrate on his lecture, and then in answering the questions at the end.
It was lunch straight after his lecture, and a few of the officers who had been in the audience stopped to speak to him and ask more questions. One by one they left and he went to gather his notes and put them in his briefcase. When he turned around, Nick was stood there, holding out a coffee to him.
"I've never seen you without a coffee cup in your hand at this time unless you are in court, so I thought I'd get you one. They ran out earlier." Nick explained.
Rafael smiled. "Thanks, Nick."
Nick shifted his weight from one foot to the other, feeling uncomfortable. "How are you feeling today?" he asked.
"Tired, hung over and sore," Rafael replied. "I don't regret it though," he added in a quiet voice.
"Neither do I," Nick said. "But it's back to real life now, and we work together."
"I know. So we're back to pretending it didn't happen." He looked at Nick who nodded. "That's fine by me. I'll see you in work next week, no doubt, Detective Amaro." Rafael took a swig of his coffee and turned around, walking away from Nick and out of the lecture hall, leaving him stood there alone. They both had good memories of the evening they had been together, but with their working lives being what they were, that was all there could be to it. What happened had to stay in LA.