Title: Confessions of a Star
Summary: 'I shift around. "My butt's soggy," I mutter. He doesn't reply. "And my back hurts," I supply. Still nothing. The waves quietly lap at my rock, as if also waiting for an answer. "Fine," I say loudly. "Fine. I'll give you an answer. I want… I want to be taller."' Finn and Rachel take a trip to a hidden cove by a lake. As they sit in the damp depths, Rachel spills her worries to Finn. FINCHEL.
"So," he says, swirling his toe in the soggy sand, "who do you want to be?"
"Be?" I'm confused.
"Yeah, like, in the future. You know… what are your goals?"
I raise my eyebrows. "Well, I want to go to NYADA, fine tune my skills – not that they need it – and become a Broadway star. Then, at the age of 24 I'll-"
"No…" he interrupts me, "who do you want to be? Not what. But… more like, how do you want to change? Where do you see yourself?"
I shift around. "My butt's soggy," I mutter. He doesn't reply. "And my back hurts," I supply. Still nothing. The waves quietly lap at my rock, as if also waiting for an answer. "Fine," I say loudly. "Fine. I'll give you an answer. I want… I want to be taller." His lips twitch in a funny sort of way, but he doesn't say anything. "I'm sick of being so short. I'm sick of having a boyfriend so much taller than me. In all the romances, the guy tucks the girl gently under his arm, and bends down to kiss her, and she is tall enough to look up and kiss him back without having to borrow a stepstool, and it's so cute and romantic and sweet and adorable and not happening to me!" I pause to take a breath.
"I want blue eyes. I want baby blues, blue like an ocean, sparkling with the clear waters of love… not some crap mud. And my nose! I'm proud of my Jewish heritage, and I know that I'm beautiful no matter what, and nothing can hinder my goal to be a star, but that doesn't mean I don't want to change things. I've got Mount Everest on my face!
"I want to be sweeter. I'm too blunt. Don't you think?" I don't wait for an answer, just keep ranting. "I know I'm overwhelming sometimes. My level of thinking is too much for some people, and they feel insulted by my insights. I feel bad about it. I want to change that."
I dip my toes in the mellow water. Despite its warmth, goose bumps run up my leg. I glance over at Finn, but all I can see is his figure, dramatically outlined against the dark stone walls of the cove.
"I just..." I feel my body sag against damp stone. "I know that I'm a star. I just wish I shone a little brighter."
Finn doesn't reply for a moment, and I'm scared. There's still one thing I haven't mentioned in all my word-barf.
"Finn?" my voice is a whisper. "Finn? Did I say too much? I can- I..." my voice trails off. I don't know what to say. I try to blink through the tears that have suddenly coated my eyes like a gauzy curtain. I said too much. Of course I did.
Suddenly, a cold hand touches my back, and I shriek in surprise.
"Sorry!" Finn says, "Sorry! I was... I was trying to be, you know... like, romantic." he sighs, and I smother a giggle.
"It's okay." I primly lay my hand on his leg, which is very close to mine. Very close to mine. My breath quickens.
"Rachel," Finn says, and turns my head so that I'm looking up into his soft coffee eyes. "Rachel Berry... you are the most extraordinary girl I know. You have done some amazing stuff. There is no one like you, Rachel. Who else can own knee socks like you?
"No one else has the courage to face their goals head-on like you do Rachel, and I think you're incredible because of that. You walk quiet Rachel, but you dream big. And because of everything you are, I will never stop loving you." He is smiling, and in his eyes I see a peaceful sort of love.
I wiped away a tear that had spilled down my cheek, and laid my other hand in Finn's. "Quietly," I say softly.
"What?" He pulls back, confused, but I just reach up and draw him close to me again.
"I walk quietly, Finn. Adverb-verb agreement."
And then I kiss him.
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