Hello everyone, sorry for the delay in my story Harry Potter and the Ultimate Love but i have little reviews so i'm taking my time on making the plot and keeping up with daily life.

This is a two-shot (possibly) story of Harry and Hermione right after the end of Voldemort for the first shot and a moment of the couple some years later.

So this is the un-betaed Past and Present and this is the Past shot :)

Enjoy...

Past and Present…

By ChristinaPotter09

His life was always difficult, he never met his parents, he met pain from an early age, and he felt rejection, fear, and terror. And then he turned eleven, and his life became both better and worse, some people think this is not possible, but for him, it was…

Those thoughts were piercing Harry's mind as he lay motionless on the mattress of his bed in Hogwarts School. Voldemort was gone for good some hours ago, the entire Wizarding world was celebrating the fall of the evil madman, but there, in Hogwarts, in the place the end were written, everyone was grieving. The losses were great, friends, people who were innocent and fought with the hope of seeing each other after the battle died because of a war in his name, in Harry's name.

Harry tried to take a deep breath but it always hitched in his throat, the tears had long dried on his pillow and he wanted none to be close to him. He could hear people downstairs; he could even feel them, their relief, their pain, their fear, their hope. But he, the Hero, the Chosen, couldn't feel, his heart was frozen and his mind stuck on the moment of himself being a murderer. He couldn't believe he had taken a life, even His life, maybe Dumbledore was right after all, maybe Harry could feel pity for him, not for the snakelike face of his, not for his vicious, red eyes, but for the little orphan in that ugly orphanage back in the pensives.

For the first time in hours, Harry moved his head and looked around him, the room was empty, he liked it, it matched his heart in the current moment. Harry could remember sometimes in the past hours the door of the dorm opening and closing but he couldn't make who was on the doorframe each time, he was sure people like the Weasleys had came to check on him, some of his old professors, and of course Hermione.

Harry finally made it and took a big breath; his lungs almost hurt with the effort his system made for that breath. Harry's thoughts travelled in the cold hours in the tent, in those cold nights around Christmas when only he and Hermione had remained. A sad sight and a true tiny smile were the reactions of Harry's at Ron's runaway and Hermione's will to stay. The last hours Harry was trying to short everything in his mind, people say when you're close to death you see your life in front of your eyes, Harry almost met death but now it was time for him to review his life.

He felt pain in his stomach when he though how little he felt when he saw Ginny after so many months. Was his need to watch her through the Marauders' map just a last attempt on trying to feel safe and remember his life in Hogwarts? When Dumbledore was alive and Harry had faith in himself? Was the feeling of emptiness in his heart at the sight of her as normal as it felt, now that everything was over and the danger was gone?

Harry's body was still stiff but his mind had started racing. Why he felt angry with Ron? He was supposed to have forgiven him for what he'd done in the tent. He was supposed to feel right every time he saw Ron and Hermione close, he was their best, and he was supposed to be happy for them, not feel jealous or nervous. Was he feeling like that because they were who they were or because Hermione was giving some of her attention on Ron and not only him anymore? What should he do with Ginny now? Where should he go and live? The Burrow just seemed bad with everyone grieving. Were the Dursleys fine? Horrible or not, they were involved in a war that had nothing to do with them. Everything has to do with him, always. How would Hermione bring her parents back in England, actually, would she do such a thing? Would she change everything in their lives once more? How would Ron react if Harry would tell him that he had only platonic feelings for Ginny now?

"Aaaargh!" Harry groaned and jerked his body in desperation as all these thoughts and even more floated inside his head. He stiffened in an instant as he realized that someone was lying behind him and an arm was around his waist.

"Sssh" he heard a female voice and he immediately relaxed as he recognized it. The same voice had been his conscience's for many years now. Even more questions entered his mind of why Hermione was laying on the same bed with him in a time like this and where Ron was right now. But he decided to forget all those questions and just relax against her touch. After a few moments he decided to turn around so they could be face-to-face. His entire body ached as he moved but no pain would compare itself with the hurt he felt when he saw Hermione's streaked with tears face.

Harry's hand moved close to her face and dried her skin as her head leaned against his touch. It was the first time he was on a bed with a girl and for a reason; it felt so good, peaceful and normal to be with Hermione like that. Hermione snuggled closer and Harry welcomed her in his arms, he wasn't sure if he could comfort her, he didn't feel strong enough to comfort someone else, he didn't feel strong at all.

'I'm happy you survived.' Hermione's whisper caressed his ears. In instinct; he tighten his hug around her. 'I'm happy the war is over.' She went on and Harry closed his eyes tightly, the war was over but would they ever heal? 'I'm scared,' Hermione added after a while, Harry looked down at her even if he could see only the top of her head.

'Me too,' he heard a harsh voice speaking and he realized it was his, it was himself who talked after so much suffocating silence. 'And I don't think we'll ever heal completely, not with everything around us being so hard and seem so fake and useless.' Harry went on. He thought Hermione would tell him that he was wrong, that everything would be alright, but she didn't speak, she just nodded her head. It scared and shocked him, she was the one to comfort him, to keep his feet on the safe ground, now she was as lost as he was…

'I don't want to be here, I don't want to be me.' Hermione said in another whisper as if she was reading his mind, and Harry felt his heart stopping. These were the words he wanted to scream out loud, this is what he wanted as well. This is how he felt and he knew that if he didn't change it once and for all, he'd be feeling the same forever. He tried for another deep breath and felt his entire body warmer as he relaxed for just a bit and enjoyed the warmth from Hermione's body against his, the warmth of her breath against his chest, the feel of her back against his palm.

How should his life be from now on? Having some time to recover and heal, as everyone expected and wanted? Keeping up with Ginny even if things seemed so clear and uninteresting for him now with everything done and said? Was he supposed to stay with Ginny and have many Potter kids, being a huge happy family with four or five kids obsessed with Quidditch and Hermione and Ron as a close friendly couple with another bunch of kids and them fighting over everything? The idea of him and Ginny – an a few weeks dating with nothing deeper then some snogging – with children seemed at the least stupid and the previously uncomfortable feelings in the thought of Hermione and Ron as a couple became range, jealousy and fear now.

'Lets leave, the two of us,' Harry said out loud and Hermione looked up at him with a frozen face. Their eyes locked for a few moments, few endless moments of understanding, need, comfort, care, love and affection. Harry looked in Hermione's familiar face very carefully, same brown orbs, same freckles, same nose, same skin but the small sparkle in her eyes was so different this time as she was probably thinking of Harry's words inside her head. Hermione was the one to think everything over all these years for him.

Hermione was the one who saved him most of the times, the only one who was mentioned by Dumbledore a few hours before in King's Cross. Hermione was the one who sacrificed everything for him, her life and her parents' lives for him. For him, what else could he ask for than her loyalty, her care, her logic… her love.

He could still remember how he felt when he saw her falling in the Department of Mysteries. He could still remember how happy and grateful he was when she brought the pieces of toast back in fourth year when he didn't want to see anyone else. He could still remember the comfort of her hug when he went to the infirmary after the battle in sixth year. He still felt jealous and annoyed at the memory of her and Ron's kiss the last night.

'Let's leave, Hermione, just you and me.' Harry repeated and tighten his hug in fear of her jerking her self away. Hermione was still looking deep in his eyes like he did but didn't speak. She only raised her head a few inches and their lips brushed against each other.

Harry was taken by surprise but after the first instants of fear and confusion he decided to let himself enjoy the rightness and the comfort of their lips connected. He moved closer and their lips were fully pressed against each other as their breaths raged. Harry dared to move his tongue to Hermione's lower lip and felt his heart aching when she opened her lips to welcome him.

The kiss lasted only a few moments, a few moments of happiness and peace. When Hermione broke it Harry feared he had just lost his best friend, the one, only true best friend he ever had, the one who never abandoned him. However when her saw her tiny smile he knew the answer.

'Lets, just you and me.' Hermione said in a soft whisper.

Soooo? What u think? it's nothing much than thoughts rushing in my head, i just needed to take them out :) Please review my work

Thanks for reading

Christina