Okay. This fic serves as an example for all those who want to write before watching the whole series. Those who do this, at least do all your homework first, ne? I didn't, and ended up forgetting this one character known as "Alex"...eheheheh. So consider this a very AU fic, 'kay?
Warnings: M+V/V+M. Probable OOC-ness. Definite AU-ness. Spoilers for the end of the series. Impending exclamation point and ellipsis abuse. Another article of proof that I am physically incapable of writing something short (this was supposed to be only 2000 words or so ^^;). Some violence, suspense, moderately foul language, and a maple orchard's worth of sap by the end. C&C Please!
Obligatory disclaimer-- Trigun and its characters aren't mine. If they were, Vash and Meryl would have confessed their undying love for each other ages ago. :)
::blah:: 'mental rambling'. Y'know, that voice in the back of your head that generally says what your consciousness doesn't want to hear.
This Time Around
Note to self: mention in next report that excessive exposure to Vash the Stampede is dangerous, as his condition is highly contagious. The condition of getting shot at by random bounty hunters who show up out of the blue, anyway. It's my turn to be target practice for thugs this time around, I guess. Oh, why did Milly have to choose this week to go visit her family? I could really use the back up right now.
For the love of-- He's not even here! Nor will he be for days! He's off at Inepril City hunting down something or other for that comatose maniac twin of his ::whom I'm supposed to be watching right now, crap!::. But will those goons over there listen to me? NooOOoo. Of course no--yeeep!
Oh my God was that close. This table isn't going to be a good shield for much longer. Wheretogo? Wheretogo?! This bar is a wreck! Most of the furniture is in smithereen-sized pieces. I think this 1/3 of a table is the biggest bit left. Several new "windows" utterly unintended by the builders have been opened in the walls. Even the floor is probably more lead than wood now. I don't even want to think of the damage claims the owners will file. Oh crap, so there's no place to run-- wait, there! There's still something left of the counter. Okay, deep breath, on three...
one, two....THREE!
RunrunrunfastershootshootjumpDIVE!
YES! Made it!
"Nimble li'l gal, ain't, boss?"
"Damn good shot too! Jesse's outta commission."
"Well, what do you expect of The Stampede's woman?"
... 'The Stampede's woman'...? 'The Stampede's woman'?!!
"Honestly, Roje. Vince. Do you think He'd settle for some useless bar wench? However, she's used up quite a few shots. She can't have that many left, can you, Derringer Meryl?"
That bastard! I am NO man's "woman". Especially not That Man. He flirts with anything in a skirt, even while they're shooting at him! Well, everything in a skirt except for me. And he never calls me by my name either. Of all the days to bring only 15 derringers... Of course, I thought I was only going for a sundae, for crying out loud.
"I've got plenty left to take care of the three of you!" Yeah, all of five left Meryl. Two deep grazes leaving you with a nearly numb left arm and a bullet in my right calf from that last stunt I pulled to get over here. No way I'm going to be able to run much now. And it took 10 shots to take care of only one of four assailants. Not a good ratio at all, girl! You've got to do better.
"Come now, Ms. Stryfe. Be a good girl and give up already. You have no chance. Just put your hands up and tell us where the Stampede is hiding, and I swear I'll let you live if he turns himself over to us."
Idiots! I told them already! "He's NOT HERE! How many times do I have to say that?"
"Nonsense. Don't lie, it's unbecoming of a lady. You follow the Stampede, you have been for years now. Everyone knows that. So consequently, where you are, he is undoubtedly nearby."
"Heh heh. You really think we'd believe you, girly?"
They're deaf. They must be. And their logic is shoddy. I'm not following That Man anymore. I just haven't felt like going home just yet, that's all. One could hardly leave that bumbling moron in charge of an invalid all on his own, anyway. He'd forget to eat!
But now they're talking, not shooting. Now's your chance, Meryl. On three. One. "I'm telling the truth," ... two... "you morons!" Three!
upshootshootDOWN!
"Gyaaaaugh! That BITCH! She shot me! I can't feel my arm!"
"Vince! Why that little--! Let's just kill 'er, boss. String up her corpse and the Stampede'll be out right quick!"
Yes! Another one down! Three shots left for only two guys. Now breathe, ignore the pain. Breathe, girl. Pull yourself back together. That Idiot does this all the time, ::never mind how much it makes me worry::, so it's possible. Focus, breathe. Make the arm work one more time.
"You try my patience, Ms. Stryfe. Keep this up and I'll rescind my generous offer."
"Like you were planning to let me live anyway!" No good. My left arm is unreliable at best. Great. Two guys, one at a time. God, I hate this. I hate this meaningless violence, pointless destruction. If it wasn't such a dangerous world, I never would have made myself learn how to use a gun. I would have been perfectly content with my nice, quiet desk job, doing my own thing to help out those people victimized by disaster. I would never have had to deal with The Blonde, Blind Moron, chasing that disaster-magnet around to who knows where like some moons-struck groupie, watching on the sidelines as he insists on jumping into situation after lethal situation...
Whoa. Hold it together, Meryl. Get the distractions out of your head. You can do this. It must be done.
"You doubt my word, Ms. Stryfe? How rude. Well, then. You give me no choice."
Come on, Meryl, don't let the pain win now. On three. One...two...three!
upaimOWCHdamnSHOOTGETDOWN!
"Graaugh! Almost girly, but I can still shoot!"
Yeeek! Lord please let this counter hold up to all that! There's no way I can run now, even if there was somewhere else with enough cover. No tears, Meryl. You're not dead yet. Hurting badly, but not dead. There's still hope. ::But Lord I wish Mr. Vash was here...:: Two left, gotta make these shots count. Wait until the instant he stops shooting. That is, if his clip's small enough to run out before my counter does. Or my stamina. Ignore the pain. Ignore the pain. Now!
owchupOWCHUPNOWDAMNITDON'TFALLSHOOTcollapse.
"Aughk!"
Oww~~~~ Where's the last guy? Where was he? I didn't see him!
"Not bad, Ms. Stryfe."
oh, SHIT!
"Not bad at all."
BANG
this isn't good... right arm's useless now too... oh wow, i thought i'd bleed more than that... no, don't wander now, gotta focus...gotta get up... come on... get up...ungh... no... up... gotta....damn. Come to gloat?
"But, unfortunately, not good enough."
yup. gloating.
"To your further misfortune, I've gotten quite tired of your stubbornness."
this is it. i'm going to die. i'm going to die, and i never told... waitaminute...heh.
"So I think I will listen to the suggestion Roje made, and leave your corpse some place nice and obvious for the Stampede to find. He'll come to get it sooner or later. I can be patient."
i've still got one shot left, creep, and with you standing over me like that, i don't have to pick my arm up to aim.
"Adios, Ms. Stryfe."
you too, pal.
"What? Who's there!?"
goodbye. Vash.
BANG
"Meryl? MERYL!"
............
Warm. Comfortably warm. No pain. No fear.
There's someone else here. I'm moving, not under my own power, though. Is this other carrying me? Mr. Vash? Wait. Why would he be carrying me? I can't remember clearly. I think there were gunshots. I got shot. Didn't I? I don't know, everything's so fuzzy...
I could have sworn I got shot... no wait, wait. I couldn't have been. There aren't any guns on the ship anymore. Besides, how can Vash carry me? He's still so little! Yes, that's right. I remember clearly Steve bellyaching about all the guns getting locked up so tight after we found the twins. Joey put a firm foot down on that one. No guns without his express permission. Good thing he did, or else Steve might have done worse to the twins than just push them around a little. Those poor boys.
Boys? But... Mr. Vash is over 130 years old. He told me himself, that one precious time when I finally got him to open up, when he told me about SEEDs, the Lost Technology, and where he and Knives came from. When he told me about...about...who was it? Anyway, he's no boy, even though he acts like one so often. Like such a silly, irresponsible, air-headed boy, and it jerks my heartstrings every time because I know he does it to hide the pain, the loneliness, even from himself.
And Vash keeps taking everything so stoically, every insult, every slap from Steve, even though I know it kills him inside that he has upset someone and he can't do anything to change it. And Knives. I know he isn't fond of me, but I can't help but feel sad for him. He feels Vash's pain as well as his own. He loves his brother so much.
Knives loves Mr. Vash? Now hold on a moment. That can't be right. Knives tried to hurt Mr. Vash. Knives did hurt Mr. Vash. A lot. He sent all the Gung Ho Guns after him, sent Legato, just to make him suffer. Is that what a loving brother does?
But I know Knives adores Vash. It's indisputable. I see it every time he looks at Vash. I can see the jealousy burn in his eyes every time Vash looks up at me with his heart in his eyes. I just wish he could accept that I love him too. He's a good kid, just fiercely protective and very determined.
Determined? You can say that again. Knives had been hunting Mr. Vash for how long? Or was it that Mr. Vash was hunting Knives? I don't know. It got so confusing those last couple of months after we found Mr. Vash again. It almost seemed that they were hunting each other, until that final shoot out...
Shoot out. Shooting. Shots. Why do I remember shots? Or was it claxons? I can't tell. There was so much noise and confusion. Something had gone drastically wrong. People were dead. The ships were crashing, and there were warning lights and alarms going off everywhere...
...no. Four hoodlums came after me when I stopped at the bar for a banana sundae. They just walked in and started shooting. Someone asked why and they pointed at me. I couldn't run. They'd blocked the exits. I had to fight back. They wanted the bounty for Mr. Vash, but when I told them he wasn't here, they just laughed and called me a liar. There were innocent people dead, and still they...
...still, I had to find them. I had to get them to an escape pod. I don't know what happened, what program failed or what system malfunctioned, but the ships were already hitting atmosphere, and I had to get them out. Vash was sobbing, even Knives was subdued. I think I really shocked both when I didn't get in the pod with them. But I had to go find Joey. He was still on the ship somewhere, and I just couldn't leave.
I couldn't leave. How could I? They'd come prepared to deal with Vash the Stampede, and all they got was little ol' me. Now I do have more than a little skill, but somewhere along the line I got too accustomed to having Milly there to back me up. ::to having Mr. Vash there to rescue me:: On my own I was overmatched and under-armed from the start. I tried, though. And I almost made it. Almost, but not quite. In the end, there was only one thing to do.
There was only one thing I could do, and escape wasn't it. Poor Vash, so many tears streaked his beautiful child's face. He kept shouting my name as I closed the hatch. Immersing myself in the frantic attempt to fix the ships' trajectories was the only thing that could get that picture out of my mind. I don't know when I realized it, but I knew I wasn't going to make it alive. I'd come to terms with most of my regrets, most but one. They were such wonderful, intriguing children, and I truly regretted that I didn't have the chance to see what kind of adults they would grow into. I had wanted that chance. I had wanted it so much. But then came an explosion, and all this fire, and then...
Shouting. I heard shouting when I... when I... I did get shot! Twice. I could only get three of the four before the last one, the boss, pinned me behind the counter and shot me in the chest. I think I knew the whole time I wasn't going to get out of that pinch alive. I had some regrets. Hell, I had lots of regrets, most of them centering around one thing-- I would never get the chance to tell Vash how much he meant to me. I don't know when it changed from a desire simply to watch and protect him, such as I could, to simple desire, but it did.
However, I had the chance to take down the snobby bastard who killed me. He dropped his guard when someone came in the door, and I shot him. That's when I heard it. Someone shouted. It sounded almost like Vash, even though he wasn't supposed to be back from Inepril yet. And he was shouting my name.
He was shouting my name. My name. What is my name? I can't quite remember which. I want to say... but I also remember...
"Mer..."
What?
"Meryl."
Is someone calling me?
"Please, Meryl. Hang on."
Vash.
"All those years ago, I couldn't save Rem. She was going to die, and there wasn't anything I could do to change that."
I remember, now.
"But damn it all, this time around I can do something about it. You I can save, Meryl."
I did get my chance.
"I'll save you. I will. Please, Meryl, don't make a liar out of me. Don't die."
I won't die, Vash. I promise. So long as you are alive, I'll never die...
...........
My calf itches. And something's tickling my chin. Ugh, it feels like I've been lying here for way too long. It's got to be long past the time I should be awake and about. I was dreaming there for a little while, I think. It must have been a doozy to keep me out for this long. Why didn't I wake up on time? I usually have an impeccable inner clock for these things...
Oh yeah. The bar.
Whoa, deep breath girl, don't go bawling now. You're apparently still alive, so that's one to the good. It seems like whatever injuries I acquired have been tended, so I'm going to live. That's good, right? No more reason to cry. But all those innocent people there... nonoNO. No crying. You're not going to blubber like That Idiot does all the time.
I must have been found by someone ::who, I wonder?:: soon after... what happened, and gotten to a doctor. I wonder how many days it's been. Has it been long enough for Vash to have gotten home? Wasn't he calling me? He's got to be worried out of his mind. I guess there's nothing to do but get up and ask.
...? Why won't my arm move? Either of them? Oh, my right one's bandaged up against my chest. Not a shabbily done job either. The doctor certainly knew what he was doing. My left one's bandaged too, I think, but that's not what's keeping it still. It feels like someone's holding it.
Vash?
Oh, my God. I never have seen him sleeping, have I? Nor so close... ::his hair is what's tickling my nose pfffft::. No. I have. Haven't I? I want to say I have, but I can't remember when. But by those bags under his eyes, this must be the first time he's slept in a while. Still, it doesn't do a thing to change how --
"Nnn? Meryl?"
"What?" Oh, Lord. He said my name. And that smile. It's lit up his eyes so brightly. "Why are you grinning at me like an empty-headed fool?"
"You're awake!"
He was worried about me. "Obviously." Is that my voice? It sounds like gravel in a barrel.
"Thank God."
Silly girl, of course he was worried about you. He worries about everybody, even the ones he shoots. "Owch! Don't squeeze so hard Vash!" No! Don't let go all the way!
"Eheh. Sorry." Is it just me or did I see regret flicker in your eyes when you let go?
"Where am I?"
"Home."
Home. Yes, I don't know when it became so, but this place has become a home. Strange how those things sneak up on a body. "How long?"
"It's sundown of the fourth day."
Four days. It doesn't seem nearly that long.
"What happened?"
"Uhm, well, when I got there, everything was already shot up pretty badly. Five people were already dead. Three of the bounty hunters were half-unconscious lying around the floor, and another one..."
Him. The cultured one whose name I never heard. The one I--
"...you were sprawled on the floor, and there was already so much blood everywhere... He was standing over you with a gun aimed at your head... I thought I was too late. He was already pulling the trigger, but..."
"I shot him." Oh, God. Did I... kill him? I must have, the way you're not looking at me with those blank eyes that almost shone so blue a moment ago.
"Yes. You did."
"I killed him, didn't I?" Calm down, girl. It doesn't need to hurt this much, I mean, its not like that guy was the first you've killed. There are those other two. Extreme cases of self defense with bad marksmanship, yes, but dead is dead. And it's not like any of them didn't deserve it.
::But now Vash will hate me...::
"...I don't know."
"Eh?" That's not like you, Vash, not knowing if he died or not.
"There wasn't any time. You were almost corpse pale already and that second bullet might have punctured your lung. If I didn't stop the bleeding right away... I did what I could in a few seconds, you caught him kinda low so he wasn't dead when I left. I haven't had a chance to go out and ask yet, since your condition didn't stabilize until just recently."
You stayed with me this whole time? All four days?
"Besides, I don't think I could see him and not wanna punch him, wounded or not. The way you fell and the way he was standing... he coulda looked up your skirt! Hmmph! The only one who's ever gonna do that and get away with it is me. The nerve of that jerk! ... How the hell did you manage to fall like that, anyway?"
I take back every nice thing I ever thought about you. This kind of serious situation, talking about whether or not somebody has *died*, and you're worried about looking up my skirt! You pervert!
"Vash, come here." This is going to sting, but he so deserves this. Now I just have to sit up.
"Yeah?"
"A little closer." I can't bend my arm quite that far, but at least I can get most of the way up.
"What?"
THWACK
"Who says you'd get away with it, pervert!"
"AAOWW~~~ Whacha do that fo~~oor?"
Owch, something ripped. But that needed to be done. Hnph. Looking up my skirt like that--- eh? My skirt... I'm not wearing one...? No blouse either... and the bandages go *underneath* my bra?! "Vash!"
"Whoa, calm down, Meryl, careful! Hold it! You shouldn't even be sitting up yet, much less doing that!"
THONK
"OW! If you keep this up, you'll pop the stitches and it'll scar worse! Meryl!! Well, if you're going to be that way-- "
Wha-What are you doing? Aowch! Drat! I can't twist around to see what he's doing back there... Oh my. Oh my, oh my. I can feel that grate over your heart against my back, even through your shirt. This isn't fair, I'm supposed to be mad at you.
"There. I know you can't stretch your arm that far, so now you can't hit me. Nyah."
I can still elbow you, though, even if I don't want to do it hard.
"Owuff!"
"Pervert, you stripped me." Ow. Drat. Craning my head to look at you hurts, too.
"Well that was the only way I could get at the wounds properly! You were shot once in the lower left leg, and once in the right pectoral- it took me three hours to get that one alone out. Then there are the two gashes I had to stitch on your arm, the half dozen abrasions and the gazillion and three splinters I had to pull out. Your clothes were ruined, anyway. And I didn't strip you, I just took off the skirt and blouse. I didn't take off your bra, I just pulled down the straps."
Splinters? Abrasions? I don't remember getting those, but it makes sense with all the tumbling I ended up doing. ... Wait a minute... You pulled the bullet out? You stitched up the gash? A doctor didn't do it? "You didn't take me to a doctor?"
"I told you, there wasn't any time. Besides, the doctors in this town couldn't have handled it. And what's the gratitude I get for spending over five hours of nerve wracking work putting you back together? Two lumps on the head and bruised ribs! You're so mean to me."
It was your voice calling me then, right before I blacked out. That's right, you did say you found me right before that guy could shoot me. But that means....
"What happened."
"Wha--? Uhm... Didn't I already explain-"
Why didn't I realize this earlier? You came back early. Something must have gone wrong.
"You weren't supposed to come back for another thre--ah, until yesterday." Uh-oh. That came out a little flatter than I intended. Crap. He got so stiff all of a sudden.
"Ah! Ahahaha... Uhm, that. Yeah, aahm, well, y'see, uhhhh...it's... y'know, I, er..."
Now you're fidgeting, Vash. Wha--? Is that a bandage on your wrist?
"What's this?"
"What? Slow down with the questions already."
What's so fascinating about that wall? Is what I said affecting you that much? No. That's wishful thinking on my part. "What did you do to your wrist?"
"Oh, you mean this? Well, uhm, you lost a whole lot more blood while I was pulling out the bullets and if you didn't get more you woulda died, 'n my type is compatible with most human ones, except for umm, B types 'cuz of something odd in the plasma I think, so I, uhm, jury-rigged something to transfer to you, ahhh, some of mine."
You gave some of your own blood to me...? But without the right equipment, you could have bled to death too!
"Aah! It's alright, I'm clean, I'm clean! I swear! Don't elbow me again!"
Idiot. I'm not worried about catching anything from you. You could have died, just for me! "Moron."
"Aaa~~, what did I do *this* time?"
"What if you bled to death too?" I startled you with that one, didn't I? Heh. Turnabout.
"If I...?"
Oh my. That smile again. You keep doing that and I might start thinking nice things about you again.
"Oh ye of little faith. Believe it or not, I do sometimes have a clue about what I'm doing."
As much as I hate to admit it, you did do a good job of bandaging everything. Even if you had to strip me nearly naked to do so. It must come from all the practice you've had bandaging yourself, you klutzy, gentle idiot.
"So long as you didn't actually rip those stitches bashing me, I think I managed to get it so that neither gash will scar to badly. Here, let me take a look at it."
Damnit, quit that! Whenever I work up a good mad at you, why do you have to go and do something like this? It makes it impossible for me to *stay* mad at you. "Owch! They're sticking."
"Well if you didn't go jarring your arm so badly when you hit me, the cuts wouldn't have started to bleed again. It's your own fault."
My fault? Oh no. "You were the one who had to go and say those things. It was my moral duty to hit you."
"Haa~~aah? Moral duty? How the hell do you figure that?"
"Hmph. I just do." And I may have to do it more often, with results like this, even if your arms are wrapped around me only so that you can get the bandages on my arm off.
"Well, it looks like you didn't actually pop any of the stitches, though you did make it bleed again. How does it feel?"
Now that's a stupid question. "It hurts like blue blazes."
"'Blue blazes'? There's a phrase I haven't heard in years. Lessee, I think I put that salve on the table over here-"
... You could probably get that much more easily if you actually got up, instead of stretching and craning like that.
"Aha! There it is. This ought to help a little."
And what is that little box with the string of white ribbon on it? You were fidgeting with it before, when I asked you why you were early. You never did answer that question, did you?
"Are you ever going to answer my question?"
"Which one? You threw so many of them at me all at once."
You know which one, and you're avoiding it. Why? "Why you came back early."
"Oh, ahaha, that one. Uhm... hang on a sec, let me finish re-wrapping your arm first."
You're stalling, Vash. That much is very obvious. "I'm sure that you can talk at the same time."
"Ah, ahahah...uhm, yeah. Well, err, I, uhh, kinda..."
"Spit it out." Whatever it is, it's got you tied in nervous knots. Was it that bad? It has to have been, if you need to steel yourself for it so visibly.
"... I lied."
You what?
"I lied when I said it would take a week and a half to make that trip. I was planning on coming back when I did. And I wasn't going to get something for Knives. As far as I know, there isn't anything that can be given or done for him, except to wait until he decides to wake up."
That box with the ribbon. That's what you got.
"Uhm, here."
It's... it's for me? Why?
"I noticed 'em when we last went up through Inepril to find that window glass that we couldn't find here so that we, ah, I could fix the kitchen window I broke, and I thought they'd look so pretty on you but I could hardly get them then, since you were right with me and they wouldn't be a surprise, so I cooked up the idea about getting something for Knives so I could go back up there without you knowing-"
"Breathe, Vash. You're rambling again." You went to all that trouble, just to get a present for me?
"Right. Okay. Ah, well, I timed it too, so I could be getting back the day before your birthday. Then I could have a surprise present for you."
Oh you damnable, loveable, considerate, sweet, sweet moron. "How did you...?"
"About your birthday? Milly lost a bet to me. It's your 25th right? Aren't you going to open it? Oh, you probably can't with only one hand, now can you."
Earrings. Long, simple ones, just two gold strands braided with one silver one... is that a diamond at the top...? It is. Oh, my. They're beautiful. Too beautiful. They can't be for me, they just can't! Oh, this is too much...
"Meryl? Are you...? What's wrong? Don't you like them? I'm so sorry... I-"
No no no, I adore them, it's just... come on girl, you're upsetting him. Calm down. "No, they're gorgeous. It's just... not fair. I don't have anything so valuable to give to you. I don't even- wait, it's in July, right?" How do I know that? I don't think you've ever told me when your birthday is, but somehow I just know. And you expected me to know that, too, didn't you? That's what your smile is telling me, like I've just proven something you've been wondering about for a long time...
"Yeah, that's as close as even I know. And don't worry about getting me anything. I've already gotten a wonderful present from you."
Eh? I haven't given you anything. At least, I don't think so.
"You haven't called me 'mister' once since you woke up. I'd... like it if you'd keep doing that."
Oh, I have been thinking of you as just 'Vash' now, haven't I? But that's hardly anything, not compared to this. Besides... "And you haven't called me 'insurance girl' either, so that's already evened out."
"You're alive."
You make that sound like there's so much loaded behind it, I'm just not sure what exactly is there. I'll have to figure it out, if that's what gets you to hold me like this. "I'll still have to get you something."
"If you insist."
You're smiling that smile again, I don't need to see it to tell. It's in your voice now. "I'll insist." I could always... no. I couldn't possibly. Just because he's been acting all sweet towards me doesn't mean that he... but the way he's... oh just do it, Meryl. Now or never. Then at least you can tell yourself you'd kissed him once.
"Meryl? What's wrong? You got so stiff all of a sudden."
"Oh, ah, it's nothing. I-- I just thought of something I could give you. For a present."
"Oh? What?"
Deep breath, Meryl, on three. One, two... "This." Three.
Warm, dry and soft. I think I've shocked you again....oh my.
Oh.... my--
Wow. I have to do that more often.
"Nnn. I like that present."
"I'll have to give it to you more often, then." Hmm...I'm sleepy all of a sudden. I've been awake too long...
"You should rest some more, Meryl. You've got a lot of recovery to do and your body needs its sleep."
No I don't, not if it means you have to get up. Damnit, my back is so cold now... But I'm so sleepy.....
"Sleep, Meryl."
Yes, sleep...sleep good...just for a little while... "Good night."
"Good night."
Sleep well, Meryl. I don't like having to use that particular gift of mine, but you really do need your rest. You pushed yourself too much too soon. I just got you back, and I am damn well not going to lose you again to something stupid brought on from improper recovery.
I've actually wondered for some time, ever since I thought I saw who you were before when I looked at who you are now that one time, but I now know for sure. I now know, for sure, that I love you both, for who you are, not for who you were, or who you would be.
And this time around, we'll get it right. You'll see. When Knives wakes up, we'll start all over again. Our tickets are still blank. And, this time around, all three of us, we'll find Eden.
Warnings: M+V/V+M. Probable OOC-ness. Definite AU-ness. Spoilers for the end of the series. Impending exclamation point and ellipsis abuse. Another article of proof that I am physically incapable of writing something short (this was supposed to be only 2000 words or so ^^;). Some violence, suspense, moderately foul language, and a maple orchard's worth of sap by the end. C&C Please!
Obligatory disclaimer-- Trigun and its characters aren't mine. If they were, Vash and Meryl would have confessed their undying love for each other ages ago. :)
::blah:: 'mental rambling'. Y'know, that voice in the back of your head that generally says what your consciousness doesn't want to hear.
This Time Around
Note to self: mention in next report that excessive exposure to Vash the Stampede is dangerous, as his condition is highly contagious. The condition of getting shot at by random bounty hunters who show up out of the blue, anyway. It's my turn to be target practice for thugs this time around, I guess. Oh, why did Milly have to choose this week to go visit her family? I could really use the back up right now.
For the love of-- He's not even here! Nor will he be for days! He's off at Inepril City hunting down something or other for that comatose maniac twin of his ::whom I'm supposed to be watching right now, crap!::. But will those goons over there listen to me? NooOOoo. Of course no--yeeep!
Oh my God was that close. This table isn't going to be a good shield for much longer. Wheretogo? Wheretogo?! This bar is a wreck! Most of the furniture is in smithereen-sized pieces. I think this 1/3 of a table is the biggest bit left. Several new "windows" utterly unintended by the builders have been opened in the walls. Even the floor is probably more lead than wood now. I don't even want to think of the damage claims the owners will file. Oh crap, so there's no place to run-- wait, there! There's still something left of the counter. Okay, deep breath, on three...
one, two....THREE!
RunrunrunfastershootshootjumpDIVE!
YES! Made it!
"Nimble li'l gal, ain't, boss?"
"Damn good shot too! Jesse's outta commission."
"Well, what do you expect of The Stampede's woman?"
... 'The Stampede's woman'...? 'The Stampede's woman'?!!
"Honestly, Roje. Vince. Do you think He'd settle for some useless bar wench? However, she's used up quite a few shots. She can't have that many left, can you, Derringer Meryl?"
That bastard! I am NO man's "woman". Especially not That Man. He flirts with anything in a skirt, even while they're shooting at him! Well, everything in a skirt except for me. And he never calls me by my name either. Of all the days to bring only 15 derringers... Of course, I thought I was only going for a sundae, for crying out loud.
"I've got plenty left to take care of the three of you!" Yeah, all of five left Meryl. Two deep grazes leaving you with a nearly numb left arm and a bullet in my right calf from that last stunt I pulled to get over here. No way I'm going to be able to run much now. And it took 10 shots to take care of only one of four assailants. Not a good ratio at all, girl! You've got to do better.
"Come now, Ms. Stryfe. Be a good girl and give up already. You have no chance. Just put your hands up and tell us where the Stampede is hiding, and I swear I'll let you live if he turns himself over to us."
Idiots! I told them already! "He's NOT HERE! How many times do I have to say that?"
"Nonsense. Don't lie, it's unbecoming of a lady. You follow the Stampede, you have been for years now. Everyone knows that. So consequently, where you are, he is undoubtedly nearby."
"Heh heh. You really think we'd believe you, girly?"
They're deaf. They must be. And their logic is shoddy. I'm not following That Man anymore. I just haven't felt like going home just yet, that's all. One could hardly leave that bumbling moron in charge of an invalid all on his own, anyway. He'd forget to eat!
But now they're talking, not shooting. Now's your chance, Meryl. On three. One. "I'm telling the truth," ... two... "you morons!" Three!
upshootshootDOWN!
"Gyaaaaugh! That BITCH! She shot me! I can't feel my arm!"
"Vince! Why that little--! Let's just kill 'er, boss. String up her corpse and the Stampede'll be out right quick!"
Yes! Another one down! Three shots left for only two guys. Now breathe, ignore the pain. Breathe, girl. Pull yourself back together. That Idiot does this all the time, ::never mind how much it makes me worry::, so it's possible. Focus, breathe. Make the arm work one more time.
"You try my patience, Ms. Stryfe. Keep this up and I'll rescind my generous offer."
"Like you were planning to let me live anyway!" No good. My left arm is unreliable at best. Great. Two guys, one at a time. God, I hate this. I hate this meaningless violence, pointless destruction. If it wasn't such a dangerous world, I never would have made myself learn how to use a gun. I would have been perfectly content with my nice, quiet desk job, doing my own thing to help out those people victimized by disaster. I would never have had to deal with The Blonde, Blind Moron, chasing that disaster-magnet around to who knows where like some moons-struck groupie, watching on the sidelines as he insists on jumping into situation after lethal situation...
Whoa. Hold it together, Meryl. Get the distractions out of your head. You can do this. It must be done.
"You doubt my word, Ms. Stryfe? How rude. Well, then. You give me no choice."
Come on, Meryl, don't let the pain win now. On three. One...two...three!
upaimOWCHdamnSHOOTGETDOWN!
"Graaugh! Almost girly, but I can still shoot!"
Yeeek! Lord please let this counter hold up to all that! There's no way I can run now, even if there was somewhere else with enough cover. No tears, Meryl. You're not dead yet. Hurting badly, but not dead. There's still hope. ::But Lord I wish Mr. Vash was here...:: Two left, gotta make these shots count. Wait until the instant he stops shooting. That is, if his clip's small enough to run out before my counter does. Or my stamina. Ignore the pain. Ignore the pain. Now!
owchupOWCHUPNOWDAMNITDON'TFALLSHOOTcollapse.
"Aughk!"
Oww~~~~ Where's the last guy? Where was he? I didn't see him!
"Not bad, Ms. Stryfe."
oh, SHIT!
"Not bad at all."
BANG
this isn't good... right arm's useless now too... oh wow, i thought i'd bleed more than that... no, don't wander now, gotta focus...gotta get up... come on... get up...ungh... no... up... gotta....damn. Come to gloat?
"But, unfortunately, not good enough."
yup. gloating.
"To your further misfortune, I've gotten quite tired of your stubbornness."
this is it. i'm going to die. i'm going to die, and i never told... waitaminute...heh.
"So I think I will listen to the suggestion Roje made, and leave your corpse some place nice and obvious for the Stampede to find. He'll come to get it sooner or later. I can be patient."
i've still got one shot left, creep, and with you standing over me like that, i don't have to pick my arm up to aim.
"Adios, Ms. Stryfe."
you too, pal.
"What? Who's there!?"
goodbye. Vash.
BANG
"Meryl? MERYL!"
............
Warm. Comfortably warm. No pain. No fear.
There's someone else here. I'm moving, not under my own power, though. Is this other carrying me? Mr. Vash? Wait. Why would he be carrying me? I can't remember clearly. I think there were gunshots. I got shot. Didn't I? I don't know, everything's so fuzzy...
I could have sworn I got shot... no wait, wait. I couldn't have been. There aren't any guns on the ship anymore. Besides, how can Vash carry me? He's still so little! Yes, that's right. I remember clearly Steve bellyaching about all the guns getting locked up so tight after we found the twins. Joey put a firm foot down on that one. No guns without his express permission. Good thing he did, or else Steve might have done worse to the twins than just push them around a little. Those poor boys.
Boys? But... Mr. Vash is over 130 years old. He told me himself, that one precious time when I finally got him to open up, when he told me about SEEDs, the Lost Technology, and where he and Knives came from. When he told me about...about...who was it? Anyway, he's no boy, even though he acts like one so often. Like such a silly, irresponsible, air-headed boy, and it jerks my heartstrings every time because I know he does it to hide the pain, the loneliness, even from himself.
And Vash keeps taking everything so stoically, every insult, every slap from Steve, even though I know it kills him inside that he has upset someone and he can't do anything to change it. And Knives. I know he isn't fond of me, but I can't help but feel sad for him. He feels Vash's pain as well as his own. He loves his brother so much.
Knives loves Mr. Vash? Now hold on a moment. That can't be right. Knives tried to hurt Mr. Vash. Knives did hurt Mr. Vash. A lot. He sent all the Gung Ho Guns after him, sent Legato, just to make him suffer. Is that what a loving brother does?
But I know Knives adores Vash. It's indisputable. I see it every time he looks at Vash. I can see the jealousy burn in his eyes every time Vash looks up at me with his heart in his eyes. I just wish he could accept that I love him too. He's a good kid, just fiercely protective and very determined.
Determined? You can say that again. Knives had been hunting Mr. Vash for how long? Or was it that Mr. Vash was hunting Knives? I don't know. It got so confusing those last couple of months after we found Mr. Vash again. It almost seemed that they were hunting each other, until that final shoot out...
Shoot out. Shooting. Shots. Why do I remember shots? Or was it claxons? I can't tell. There was so much noise and confusion. Something had gone drastically wrong. People were dead. The ships were crashing, and there were warning lights and alarms going off everywhere...
...no. Four hoodlums came after me when I stopped at the bar for a banana sundae. They just walked in and started shooting. Someone asked why and they pointed at me. I couldn't run. They'd blocked the exits. I had to fight back. They wanted the bounty for Mr. Vash, but when I told them he wasn't here, they just laughed and called me a liar. There were innocent people dead, and still they...
...still, I had to find them. I had to get them to an escape pod. I don't know what happened, what program failed or what system malfunctioned, but the ships were already hitting atmosphere, and I had to get them out. Vash was sobbing, even Knives was subdued. I think I really shocked both when I didn't get in the pod with them. But I had to go find Joey. He was still on the ship somewhere, and I just couldn't leave.
I couldn't leave. How could I? They'd come prepared to deal with Vash the Stampede, and all they got was little ol' me. Now I do have more than a little skill, but somewhere along the line I got too accustomed to having Milly there to back me up. ::to having Mr. Vash there to rescue me:: On my own I was overmatched and under-armed from the start. I tried, though. And I almost made it. Almost, but not quite. In the end, there was only one thing to do.
There was only one thing I could do, and escape wasn't it. Poor Vash, so many tears streaked his beautiful child's face. He kept shouting my name as I closed the hatch. Immersing myself in the frantic attempt to fix the ships' trajectories was the only thing that could get that picture out of my mind. I don't know when I realized it, but I knew I wasn't going to make it alive. I'd come to terms with most of my regrets, most but one. They were such wonderful, intriguing children, and I truly regretted that I didn't have the chance to see what kind of adults they would grow into. I had wanted that chance. I had wanted it so much. But then came an explosion, and all this fire, and then...
Shouting. I heard shouting when I... when I... I did get shot! Twice. I could only get three of the four before the last one, the boss, pinned me behind the counter and shot me in the chest. I think I knew the whole time I wasn't going to get out of that pinch alive. I had some regrets. Hell, I had lots of regrets, most of them centering around one thing-- I would never get the chance to tell Vash how much he meant to me. I don't know when it changed from a desire simply to watch and protect him, such as I could, to simple desire, but it did.
However, I had the chance to take down the snobby bastard who killed me. He dropped his guard when someone came in the door, and I shot him. That's when I heard it. Someone shouted. It sounded almost like Vash, even though he wasn't supposed to be back from Inepril yet. And he was shouting my name.
He was shouting my name. My name. What is my name? I can't quite remember which. I want to say... but I also remember...
"Mer..."
What?
"Meryl."
Is someone calling me?
"Please, Meryl. Hang on."
Vash.
"All those years ago, I couldn't save Rem. She was going to die, and there wasn't anything I could do to change that."
I remember, now.
"But damn it all, this time around I can do something about it. You I can save, Meryl."
I did get my chance.
"I'll save you. I will. Please, Meryl, don't make a liar out of me. Don't die."
I won't die, Vash. I promise. So long as you are alive, I'll never die...
...........
My calf itches. And something's tickling my chin. Ugh, it feels like I've been lying here for way too long. It's got to be long past the time I should be awake and about. I was dreaming there for a little while, I think. It must have been a doozy to keep me out for this long. Why didn't I wake up on time? I usually have an impeccable inner clock for these things...
Oh yeah. The bar.
Whoa, deep breath girl, don't go bawling now. You're apparently still alive, so that's one to the good. It seems like whatever injuries I acquired have been tended, so I'm going to live. That's good, right? No more reason to cry. But all those innocent people there... nonoNO. No crying. You're not going to blubber like That Idiot does all the time.
I must have been found by someone ::who, I wonder?:: soon after... what happened, and gotten to a doctor. I wonder how many days it's been. Has it been long enough for Vash to have gotten home? Wasn't he calling me? He's got to be worried out of his mind. I guess there's nothing to do but get up and ask.
...? Why won't my arm move? Either of them? Oh, my right one's bandaged up against my chest. Not a shabbily done job either. The doctor certainly knew what he was doing. My left one's bandaged too, I think, but that's not what's keeping it still. It feels like someone's holding it.
Vash?
Oh, my God. I never have seen him sleeping, have I? Nor so close... ::his hair is what's tickling my nose pfffft::. No. I have. Haven't I? I want to say I have, but I can't remember when. But by those bags under his eyes, this must be the first time he's slept in a while. Still, it doesn't do a thing to change how --
"Nnn? Meryl?"
"What?" Oh, Lord. He said my name. And that smile. It's lit up his eyes so brightly. "Why are you grinning at me like an empty-headed fool?"
"You're awake!"
He was worried about me. "Obviously." Is that my voice? It sounds like gravel in a barrel.
"Thank God."
Silly girl, of course he was worried about you. He worries about everybody, even the ones he shoots. "Owch! Don't squeeze so hard Vash!" No! Don't let go all the way!
"Eheh. Sorry." Is it just me or did I see regret flicker in your eyes when you let go?
"Where am I?"
"Home."
Home. Yes, I don't know when it became so, but this place has become a home. Strange how those things sneak up on a body. "How long?"
"It's sundown of the fourth day."
Four days. It doesn't seem nearly that long.
"What happened?"
"Uhm, well, when I got there, everything was already shot up pretty badly. Five people were already dead. Three of the bounty hunters were half-unconscious lying around the floor, and another one..."
Him. The cultured one whose name I never heard. The one I--
"...you were sprawled on the floor, and there was already so much blood everywhere... He was standing over you with a gun aimed at your head... I thought I was too late. He was already pulling the trigger, but..."
"I shot him." Oh, God. Did I... kill him? I must have, the way you're not looking at me with those blank eyes that almost shone so blue a moment ago.
"Yes. You did."
"I killed him, didn't I?" Calm down, girl. It doesn't need to hurt this much, I mean, its not like that guy was the first you've killed. There are those other two. Extreme cases of self defense with bad marksmanship, yes, but dead is dead. And it's not like any of them didn't deserve it.
::But now Vash will hate me...::
"...I don't know."
"Eh?" That's not like you, Vash, not knowing if he died or not.
"There wasn't any time. You were almost corpse pale already and that second bullet might have punctured your lung. If I didn't stop the bleeding right away... I did what I could in a few seconds, you caught him kinda low so he wasn't dead when I left. I haven't had a chance to go out and ask yet, since your condition didn't stabilize until just recently."
You stayed with me this whole time? All four days?
"Besides, I don't think I could see him and not wanna punch him, wounded or not. The way you fell and the way he was standing... he coulda looked up your skirt! Hmmph! The only one who's ever gonna do that and get away with it is me. The nerve of that jerk! ... How the hell did you manage to fall like that, anyway?"
I take back every nice thing I ever thought about you. This kind of serious situation, talking about whether or not somebody has *died*, and you're worried about looking up my skirt! You pervert!
"Vash, come here." This is going to sting, but he so deserves this. Now I just have to sit up.
"Yeah?"
"A little closer." I can't bend my arm quite that far, but at least I can get most of the way up.
"What?"
THWACK
"Who says you'd get away with it, pervert!"
"AAOWW~~~ Whacha do that fo~~oor?"
Owch, something ripped. But that needed to be done. Hnph. Looking up my skirt like that--- eh? My skirt... I'm not wearing one...? No blouse either... and the bandages go *underneath* my bra?! "Vash!"
"Whoa, calm down, Meryl, careful! Hold it! You shouldn't even be sitting up yet, much less doing that!"
THONK
"OW! If you keep this up, you'll pop the stitches and it'll scar worse! Meryl!! Well, if you're going to be that way-- "
Wha-What are you doing? Aowch! Drat! I can't twist around to see what he's doing back there... Oh my. Oh my, oh my. I can feel that grate over your heart against my back, even through your shirt. This isn't fair, I'm supposed to be mad at you.
"There. I know you can't stretch your arm that far, so now you can't hit me. Nyah."
I can still elbow you, though, even if I don't want to do it hard.
"Owuff!"
"Pervert, you stripped me." Ow. Drat. Craning my head to look at you hurts, too.
"Well that was the only way I could get at the wounds properly! You were shot once in the lower left leg, and once in the right pectoral- it took me three hours to get that one alone out. Then there are the two gashes I had to stitch on your arm, the half dozen abrasions and the gazillion and three splinters I had to pull out. Your clothes were ruined, anyway. And I didn't strip you, I just took off the skirt and blouse. I didn't take off your bra, I just pulled down the straps."
Splinters? Abrasions? I don't remember getting those, but it makes sense with all the tumbling I ended up doing. ... Wait a minute... You pulled the bullet out? You stitched up the gash? A doctor didn't do it? "You didn't take me to a doctor?"
"I told you, there wasn't any time. Besides, the doctors in this town couldn't have handled it. And what's the gratitude I get for spending over five hours of nerve wracking work putting you back together? Two lumps on the head and bruised ribs! You're so mean to me."
It was your voice calling me then, right before I blacked out. That's right, you did say you found me right before that guy could shoot me. But that means....
"What happened."
"Wha--? Uhm... Didn't I already explain-"
Why didn't I realize this earlier? You came back early. Something must have gone wrong.
"You weren't supposed to come back for another thre--ah, until yesterday." Uh-oh. That came out a little flatter than I intended. Crap. He got so stiff all of a sudden.
"Ah! Ahahaha... Uhm, that. Yeah, aahm, well, y'see, uhhhh...it's... y'know, I, er..."
Now you're fidgeting, Vash. Wha--? Is that a bandage on your wrist?
"What's this?"
"What? Slow down with the questions already."
What's so fascinating about that wall? Is what I said affecting you that much? No. That's wishful thinking on my part. "What did you do to your wrist?"
"Oh, you mean this? Well, uhm, you lost a whole lot more blood while I was pulling out the bullets and if you didn't get more you woulda died, 'n my type is compatible with most human ones, except for umm, B types 'cuz of something odd in the plasma I think, so I, uhm, jury-rigged something to transfer to you, ahhh, some of mine."
You gave some of your own blood to me...? But without the right equipment, you could have bled to death too!
"Aah! It's alright, I'm clean, I'm clean! I swear! Don't elbow me again!"
Idiot. I'm not worried about catching anything from you. You could have died, just for me! "Moron."
"Aaa~~, what did I do *this* time?"
"What if you bled to death too?" I startled you with that one, didn't I? Heh. Turnabout.
"If I...?"
Oh my. That smile again. You keep doing that and I might start thinking nice things about you again.
"Oh ye of little faith. Believe it or not, I do sometimes have a clue about what I'm doing."
As much as I hate to admit it, you did do a good job of bandaging everything. Even if you had to strip me nearly naked to do so. It must come from all the practice you've had bandaging yourself, you klutzy, gentle idiot.
"So long as you didn't actually rip those stitches bashing me, I think I managed to get it so that neither gash will scar to badly. Here, let me take a look at it."
Damnit, quit that! Whenever I work up a good mad at you, why do you have to go and do something like this? It makes it impossible for me to *stay* mad at you. "Owch! They're sticking."
"Well if you didn't go jarring your arm so badly when you hit me, the cuts wouldn't have started to bleed again. It's your own fault."
My fault? Oh no. "You were the one who had to go and say those things. It was my moral duty to hit you."
"Haa~~aah? Moral duty? How the hell do you figure that?"
"Hmph. I just do." And I may have to do it more often, with results like this, even if your arms are wrapped around me only so that you can get the bandages on my arm off.
"Well, it looks like you didn't actually pop any of the stitches, though you did make it bleed again. How does it feel?"
Now that's a stupid question. "It hurts like blue blazes."
"'Blue blazes'? There's a phrase I haven't heard in years. Lessee, I think I put that salve on the table over here-"
... You could probably get that much more easily if you actually got up, instead of stretching and craning like that.
"Aha! There it is. This ought to help a little."
And what is that little box with the string of white ribbon on it? You were fidgeting with it before, when I asked you why you were early. You never did answer that question, did you?
"Are you ever going to answer my question?"
"Which one? You threw so many of them at me all at once."
You know which one, and you're avoiding it. Why? "Why you came back early."
"Oh, ahaha, that one. Uhm... hang on a sec, let me finish re-wrapping your arm first."
You're stalling, Vash. That much is very obvious. "I'm sure that you can talk at the same time."
"Ah, ahahah...uhm, yeah. Well, err, I, uhh, kinda..."
"Spit it out." Whatever it is, it's got you tied in nervous knots. Was it that bad? It has to have been, if you need to steel yourself for it so visibly.
"... I lied."
You what?
"I lied when I said it would take a week and a half to make that trip. I was planning on coming back when I did. And I wasn't going to get something for Knives. As far as I know, there isn't anything that can be given or done for him, except to wait until he decides to wake up."
That box with the ribbon. That's what you got.
"Uhm, here."
It's... it's for me? Why?
"I noticed 'em when we last went up through Inepril to find that window glass that we couldn't find here so that we, ah, I could fix the kitchen window I broke, and I thought they'd look so pretty on you but I could hardly get them then, since you were right with me and they wouldn't be a surprise, so I cooked up the idea about getting something for Knives so I could go back up there without you knowing-"
"Breathe, Vash. You're rambling again." You went to all that trouble, just to get a present for me?
"Right. Okay. Ah, well, I timed it too, so I could be getting back the day before your birthday. Then I could have a surprise present for you."
Oh you damnable, loveable, considerate, sweet, sweet moron. "How did you...?"
"About your birthday? Milly lost a bet to me. It's your 25th right? Aren't you going to open it? Oh, you probably can't with only one hand, now can you."
Earrings. Long, simple ones, just two gold strands braided with one silver one... is that a diamond at the top...? It is. Oh, my. They're beautiful. Too beautiful. They can't be for me, they just can't! Oh, this is too much...
"Meryl? Are you...? What's wrong? Don't you like them? I'm so sorry... I-"
No no no, I adore them, it's just... come on girl, you're upsetting him. Calm down. "No, they're gorgeous. It's just... not fair. I don't have anything so valuable to give to you. I don't even- wait, it's in July, right?" How do I know that? I don't think you've ever told me when your birthday is, but somehow I just know. And you expected me to know that, too, didn't you? That's what your smile is telling me, like I've just proven something you've been wondering about for a long time...
"Yeah, that's as close as even I know. And don't worry about getting me anything. I've already gotten a wonderful present from you."
Eh? I haven't given you anything. At least, I don't think so.
"You haven't called me 'mister' once since you woke up. I'd... like it if you'd keep doing that."
Oh, I have been thinking of you as just 'Vash' now, haven't I? But that's hardly anything, not compared to this. Besides... "And you haven't called me 'insurance girl' either, so that's already evened out."
"You're alive."
You make that sound like there's so much loaded behind it, I'm just not sure what exactly is there. I'll have to figure it out, if that's what gets you to hold me like this. "I'll still have to get you something."
"If you insist."
You're smiling that smile again, I don't need to see it to tell. It's in your voice now. "I'll insist." I could always... no. I couldn't possibly. Just because he's been acting all sweet towards me doesn't mean that he... but the way he's... oh just do it, Meryl. Now or never. Then at least you can tell yourself you'd kissed him once.
"Meryl? What's wrong? You got so stiff all of a sudden."
"Oh, ah, it's nothing. I-- I just thought of something I could give you. For a present."
"Oh? What?"
Deep breath, Meryl, on three. One, two... "This." Three.
Warm, dry and soft. I think I've shocked you again....oh my.
Oh.... my--
Wow. I have to do that more often.
"Nnn. I like that present."
"I'll have to give it to you more often, then." Hmm...I'm sleepy all of a sudden. I've been awake too long...
"You should rest some more, Meryl. You've got a lot of recovery to do and your body needs its sleep."
No I don't, not if it means you have to get up. Damnit, my back is so cold now... But I'm so sleepy.....
"Sleep, Meryl."
Yes, sleep...sleep good...just for a little while... "Good night."
"Good night."
Sleep well, Meryl. I don't like having to use that particular gift of mine, but you really do need your rest. You pushed yourself too much too soon. I just got you back, and I am damn well not going to lose you again to something stupid brought on from improper recovery.
I've actually wondered for some time, ever since I thought I saw who you were before when I looked at who you are now that one time, but I now know for sure. I now know, for sure, that I love you both, for who you are, not for who you were, or who you would be.
And this time around, we'll get it right. You'll see. When Knives wakes up, we'll start all over again. Our tickets are still blank. And, this time around, all three of us, we'll find Eden.