Ok here goes the first one in honor to Gaara´s birthday! It goes a little too quickly in the end but I ran out of time. Dedicated to Gaara fangirls! Special thanks to Nati who helped me through this story. Thanks a lot! Don´t flame me too hard it´s only my first one. And of course I don´t own Naruto which is good or it wuld be too much pressure and I´d die, but of course that would also mean I own Gaara. Now I´m sad. Also consider English is NOT my first language soo go gentle if anything´s weird. And sorry if Gaara seems a bit OOC but I had a hard time getting inside his head, you try it, my editing updates may take from a couple of days to a couple of weeks since I don´t own a computer.. so without any further ado, ladies and gentlemen my first fanfic.
Ok so I'm editing all my stories, checking for spelling mistakes, making them longer, tweaking here and there to make them better, and I would love it if any of you pointed out the mistakes in here, it'd help me a lot, all or most spelling mistakes are caused by a lack of a spelling checking program and my mistakes while typing, so please help!
He couldn't sleep, literally. It had been so long, he just wanted to close his eyes, it would only be a few seconds. He shut his eyes and breathed in deeply. When he opened them again he stared around. He thought he heard something, but it might just be the wind, it was after all, a really windy night, which took sand and made it fly and move around everywhere, almost as if it were playing a game with it, teasing it. But still, it never hurt to be careful. Then he spotted something, a figure moving somewhere between the sand. He looked around and then down at himself and was shocked. He was six again. He panicked slightly; he wouldn't be able to fight. He forced himself to calm down and looked at the figure which has become clearer as it came closer and the sand and wind began to settle. She was alone, he couldn't see her clearly, but the little girl came closer. She must be around the same age as him, perhaps a little younger; she had long, straight, but slightly messy jet black hair. Her skin was white as marble and her eyes were like pools of molten emeralds. She looked at him, curiosity clearly written in her eyes, it was a very innocent curiosity. It was strange, or at least he felt it was, she wasn't looking at him with anger, dislike, fear or disgust. She wasn't looking at him with the stares he usually had to endure. Slowly a smile crawled its way to her lips, and she spoke. She spoke with a soft voice, full of sweetness and the same curiosity that shone clearly in her eyes.
"Who are you?"
He looked at her doubtfully and he spoke with a clear calm voice that had nothing to do with how he felt inside.
"I could ask the same thing" he stated coldly.
She looked shocked for half a second, her face fell slightly but she regained composture and half said-half asked.
"My name?... the one I was given by my parents…..I don't really use, uhm but people back home call me Michiko, you can call me that as well. Well sime do anyway. I'm five, sooo, um, what's your name?"
He looked at her with the same distrustful eyes as before, and figured it wouldn't hurt to tell her, so he slowly said
"I'm Gaara, Sabaku no Gaara, that's what they call me, and I'm guessing you're from Konoha?"
He asked looking at the badge on her left arm sleeve and recognizing the shape it had under the soft moonlight. But wasn't that only for shinobi? She nodded her head shyly.
"Aren't you afraid of me?" he asked bluntly.
The little girl surveyed him up and down and shook her head gingerly, and smiled as she asked
"Why should I be?"
"Everybody is everyone here, they all hate me, they all fear me." he stated letting a little sadness and bitterness drip in his voice.
"Why? Did you hurt them?" The little girl inquired.
"I didn't, but I'm a monster"
She looked piercingly into his eyes, and, as green met green he felt as if she were searching his eyes to look at his soul. After a few seconds she stated
"Monsters hurt people, you haven't hurt anyone unlike me, you are NOT a monster" she looked stubborn as she said this and she put a lot of emphasis on the word not, but for some reason he couldn't let her have the last word. He looked at her in surprise and frowned, after all no one had ever talked to him like that, there was something about her….
"But I am, I killed my uncle" he confessed. She stared at him. Why had he said that? It might have been his only chance to have a friend, he had messed it up. She was probably going to run away or scream anytime soon….but instead of that se sat to his side and patted the ground next to her inviting him to sit down. He did it and she asked him
"Why did you do it?" she asked.
He just stared at her in surprise. The way she looked at him, the way she had asked, it wasn't accusing or fearful. It was curiosity again, she seemed to genuinely want to know, and it seemed it actually mattered to her, that she actually cared about it, he wondered why...
So he started explaining everything about his life. From the monster inside of him, from how his father wouldn't look at him, to his brother and sister to the villagers, how they looked at him, those cold eyes full of hatred…of his mother and her brother, his uncle, the person he had trusted, opened up to, perhaps even looked up to?...the same person that had tried, to the cost of his life, to end his existence as orders from the Kazekage, his own family, his own father… he didn't know why, but he talked on and on seeing as it was really easy, so easy to tell everything he had been fighting against for so long. Next thing he knew he had told the little girl he had only known for a few minutes his entire biography. It had been so easy, and it felt so good… But still…
He looked down, he didn't dare meet her eyes, which by now must be terrified. She stood up and he heard his steps. He couldn't blame her, and even as he closed his eyes not wanting to see yet another figure retreating away from him, he couldn´t help but feel slightly disappointed. Then he felt a couple of small, thin arms around his back, his eyes darted open in shock, and he found himself staring at the girl. She hugged him so warmly, so tenderly, so sweetly. He didn't know why but his cheeks felt so warm…
"You're not gonna leave me?" he asked barely daring to hope. She shook her head energically and said "I couldn´t leave you like this, not after what you said…I kind of know how you feel…" she explained.
"Aren't you afraid, I'm a monster" he reminded her.
"No" she stated firmly "the monsters are the one who made your life what it is, the ones who hurt you, but you can´t hold a grudge to them. They're just afraid. I apologize for them" she said swiftly getting up and kneeling down, bowing low to him so that her forehead touched the ground, he protested
"Don´t! you didn´t do me wrong"
She simply shrugged and said "I know what I´m doing, unlike them, and you know what, you do have a friend!" she said smiling radiantly. He looked at her wonderingly and asked
"who?"
She stood up very straight and almost yelled "ME!"
His lips turned upward into the most sincere and only happy smile he had given, the most wonderful of all. And it had been used well.
Both kids stayed and talked, and played, because after all they were kids who laughed when something amused them, so they ran, jumped and laughed, oblivious to their surroundings. They finally sat down a bit tired, and they stayed next to each other for hours talking and then silent. By now, the sun's rays were looming over the horizon, signaling that dawn was on it's way. Then she got up and said "I'm so sorry, I have to go, I don't want to but I must or they will find me and drag me back! I can't go live at home, not yet anyway. But one day we will see each other again, I promise. Just remember I'm your friend" she hugged him again, smiled and giving him no time to react she turned on her heel and started running into the darkness of the street. He finally managed to pull himself together and standing up he yelled "WAIT! DON´T LEAVE ME!"
He woke up, panting, a light layer of sweat covering his light skin. He felt exhilarated. That dream. Again. It had been haunting him for days. Although he had to admit it was better then the ususal and very recurrent nightmares, it bothered him a lot. In all his pain and hate he had forgotten about that little ray of light, of hope that had somehow filtered into his life so long ago, but now he remembered. He needed to find her and thank her, he didn´t know why but he knew he couldn´t move on until he did. She was, after all, his first friend. He shook his head in exasperation. He had been used so used to not sleeping that now it was hard for him to do so. He got out of his room and headed for the rooftop. He liked it out here, it was quiet, the moon shone as brightly as it had that night. He put his head between his hands and sighed. Maybe she had just fooled him; perhaps she had planned it just to get away from him alive. He wanted to believe otherwise so he tried to push the negative thoughts and stared at the moon. It had been almost ten years since that wonderful thought. He sighed again and looked down, imagining a slight figure running away gracefully. Every night for three months he had been looking down that street, almost as if expecting to see her figure. Feeling utterly foolish he got up and went back in his house. He needed to rest, maybe he should just forget about it, but he couldn´t so maybe someday he would see her again. Just maybe.
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It was a sunny, breezy morning in Konoha. Slowly and carefully a girl got up. She acted as if by going to quickly she would ruin the beauty of it all. Sunlight flooding the room from her very large window, the view outside looking magnificent. Inside everything seemed to glow too. And the girl who got up and as she smiled while the sunlight slipped through her hair seemed to glow with joy. She was home again. She went into the bathroom and started getting ready. In 20 minutes she took a shower and got dressed. She looked at the mirror and smiled at the white skinned, green eyed, black haired girl looking back at her. She looked at the clock on her wall, took a backpack from a corner and headed out full speed. She smiled as she breathed in the sweet smelling air. It was spring, one of the most beautiful Konoha had ever seen. She walked towards the entrance door as she thought that she seemed to run away from home, since she had just gotten back and she was leaving again. It would be a long trip so she needed to get a move on. Suddenly everything went blank for a few seconds, the air left her lungs and she was caught in a bone breaking hug. When she recovered from shock she looked down to see… a lot of orange. "Naruto!" she managed to gasp, she would have fallen unconscious, if it hadn´t been for her fellow green eyed girl, who with a yell of "let her go you baka" punched him in the face therefore knocking him aside pretty much unconscious, which made him let go. She smiled, recovered her breath and sighed a small thanks under her breath to the pink haired girl. Sakura nodded her head and smiled widely.
"Long time no see"
"I know, I know, gomen ne, but I could come back just now. How long was it this time? 4 years? You´ve grown a lot huh?" the blackhead asked just as Naruto began to stir. Both girls turned their attention to him and smiled as he straightened up, shook his head in a mesmerized way. He looked at Sakura and frowned saying
"No fair, you punched me from behind" he then turned to the other girl and smiled as he said "you´ve grown nee-Chan, I´m happy to see you again" he got up and put his arm around her shoulder and said "but you´re still too small for me" at which the girl slapped the back of his head and muttered "same as ever I guess" at which Sakura nodded solemnly. The black haired girl surveyed both teens. She then said "I´m sorry but I have to be on my way" she said gingerly.
"Aaawww, already leaving me? What kind of sister are you?" Naruto whined.
"The kind that has to go to Suna" she answered. "Don´t worry I´ll be back soon!" she went on trying to cheer him up. He looked at her, eyes full of worry and asked
"Promise Michiko?"
She smiled and said "Cross my heart, but call me Emily, that´s my name" she finished looking at them, smiling at their surprise.
"You finally came to terms with that?" asked Sakura speaking up again.
Emily nodded and said "I have, it took me a while, but I finally did, sorry you guys, but I really have to go" she said, at which, Naruto took her by the wrist and started walking while he said "I´ll walk you there"
The girl started to stumble on her feet, and stared at him, surprised but happy, and she spoke "ok but let me go, I want you to walk me there, not DRAG me there" he smiled sheepishly and did as was instructed.
"Ok, gomen ne nee-chan"
She smiled and when they got to the door she hugged him again, whispered "I´ll be back" turned on her heel and started running. She wouldn´t waste time. She had a promise she needed to keep.
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Gaara sighed putting down a sheet and picking up the next one, rather grudgingly. He looked at it and tried to read but put it down, finally giving up after reading the first ten words three times and not taking anything of what he read. He couldn´t think straight, not with his mind drifting away to the little girl. Yes, it had been Naruto who brought him back to the light. Yes, it had been thanks to him he knew what friendship really meant. And yes, he considered him his best friend. But she had been his first friend. And perhaps she was one of the reasons he managed to pull back from his darkness. Gaara looked up and looked at the village through his window and surprised himself thinking of taking a walk. He frowned looking at all his work, but if he was honest with himself he would never get it done if he didn´t clear his head even a little. And being trapped in his office was NOT a good way to clean his mind. He frowned, got up and walked out completely unaware of the fact that he would soon meet with the cause of his distraction.
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He began walking letting his feet lead the way, taking everything in. he cherished this village and everything about it, he was unconsciously going to a nearby playground, a place that held painful memories for him but that also reminded him of his new purpose. His new life. He shook his head and (at least in his mind) he smiled. Yes a new life and it was just right.
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She was walking through Suna. It was a beautiful sight. Or at least she thought so. So many shades of yellow and brown from gold and straw colored walls to amber and coffee. It was amazing. And of course the occasional face of a villager that looked at her with curiosity. It was a slightly windy day and the sand and the wind kept playing with her hair, and although she didn´t mind much. It ended messing up her hair more than it already was. She smiled as she tied it in a long, high ponytail, leaving only her bangs and two strands of hair framing her beautiful face. She wanted to look presentable at least. She shook her head. He might not even remember her. Coming was a stupid idea, but she was here and if her Nii-san had taught her anything it had been determination, courage and to always keep her promises. She felt stupid for coming but didn´t mind much. She felt welcome here. Not by the people but by the environment. It was a familiar feeling and nothing bad ever followed that feeling. She smiled but then her attention was caught by a little group of boys and girls, they were probably 4 or 5 years younger than herself, presumbably playing to be shinobi, being watched by a cold looking, red headed, green eyed boy presumably around her age.
"Ok don´t chicken out now" she took a deep breath followed by a step towards him, but yet again her attention was caught by something else. This time by a little girl that in an act of both a lot of bravery and a LOT MORE stupidity had jumped standing from the swing when it was at level with the tube that held it up, crashed into a wall and then into the floor landing with a nasty thud and a few cracks. She widened her eyes and ran towards the girl beating the Kazekage to it. Her hand glowed green as she started healing the girl´s knee and ankle which seemed to need more urgent care, bending over more than necessary so his eyes wouldn´t meet hers. She would have to face it, but she had a few seconds, maybe minutes, and she would use them.
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He had gotten lost in his memories. Therefore he noticed the little girl only when she was on the floor. He moved towards her but someone had already kneeled in front of the girl, examined her and was now treating her with green glowing hands. He had only seen a long sweep from a curtain of black. He stepped behind the person, apparently a female, giving her a little space. Some people had slowly gathered around hearing the thud and the scream and were fussing about. A woman looked like she might be the girl´s mother watched anxiously. The girl finally stood up and told the little one
"There, you're fine now, just try to land on the floor instead of a wall next time, k honey?" she said sweetly and turned to the mother saying "She should be fine, and her bones will be stronger." The woman smiled and thanked her and the blackhead nodded. Gaara looked at her shocked since he had recognized that voice, but he remained cold on his complexion. That voice… it was slightly more mature but it was…
The girl pulled him out of his thoughts turning to face him without really doing so since she was in a deep bow to him and spoke "Three broken ribs, dislocated ankle, broken knee, bruises, minor cut on left shoulder, blood stain on the ground and you might want to consider putting something soft on that wall because I get the feeling it won't be the last time it happens. I´m sorry to have interfered, my instinct got the best of me, please forgive me Kazekage-sama" she had let it out so quickly she was shocked he understood. He shook his head and said "
stand up straight, I should thank you for doing a service to my village, I would like to know you identity Konoha kunoichi" he said looking at the badge en her wrist. She slowly straightened up, her long hair giving way to her face and although he had suspected as much he couldn´t help but be pleasantly surprised as he saw the girl´s face.
"Michiko" he stated coldly, but his eyes only slightly gave him away. She had grown up, but her pink pale lips, her white skin and her molten emerald eyes were the same, and just as lovely. She smiled and said
"that´s how you know me but… my name is Emily. I´m sorry it took me so long to keep my promise"
She seemed a bit abashed. He had so much to ask her…
Suddenly she spoke, suddenly showing deep interest for her feet.
"Ano, I was hoping we could maybe talk, I know you´re busy and I´ll understand if you can´t but…"
"How about we talk over lunch in , say 2 hours?" he asked, in a very impulsive act. This was not like him at all, but then again… he felt different. One way or another he seemed to have said the right thing; she was smiling like a child given a gift. For a brief second he had the urge to smile too, but he fought it down and remained stoic.
They both went their ways feeling slightly surprised, pleasantly surprised. Gaara couldn´t help but frown slightly at the sudden thought of the large pile of paperwork still to do. These would be 2 long hours.
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The smiling girl walked down the street, thinking where she was going to change her clothes when a figure blocked her path. She stared up in surprise and saw the woman from before, noticing, as she did so, that she was really young, probably no more than 23, with a small figure clinging to the side of her skirt. The little girl she had helped and her mother. She just stayed there looking at them when the woman spoke
"Thank you again, I hope you will accompany us for dinner, and if there is anything we can do for you just name it" she bowed as she said the last part.
Emily looked at her and softly said "It´s alright don´t bow, by the way I´m Emily, and you would be…."
The woman smiled "I´m Kaoru and this is my daughter Hitomi"
"Oh, it fits you well" Emily answered kneeling so she was looking directly into the girl´s eyes and started "Of course I´ll join you for dinner, and well, if you know somewhere I can change my clothes? I have a…date for lunch" she said almost doubting the last part and blushing slightly. This didn't go unnoticed by the older woman and she exclaimed
"Oooooh, of course, you can change at my house and tell me who the lucky boy is" she winked and pulled Emily through the streets. She was rather taken aback at the sudden change of character, but shrugged and followed the Kaoru through the streets of Suna.
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After a really long hour of Kaoru´s taunts, questions and her insistence on getting her "ready" she went out to the street and walked to her date with the Kazekage. She had quiet liked the woman, and the girl, so frail, who wanted to be a shinobi, was very sweet as well. She was walking toward the playground when se realized thay hadn't agreed on a meeting place. Where did he supose she'd meet him? She shrugged and kept walking. Lunch with the Kazekage... Kazekage... It made him sound so mature, and he probably lived up to it fairly well, but she had seen him as a small child and until they talked again, that impression would stay. Suddenly she bumped into something, she glared up expecting to have a glaring match with a wall and instead she found herself glaring at Gaara. She blinked and took a step back quickly. She said
"Oh I´m sorry, that was silly and careless of me, not that it means much coming from me.."
He looked at her, impassive as ever, but that was just instinct for he was slightly amused at the girl´s actions.
"Shall we go?" he asked the girl, who still seemed to be muttering to herself. She looked up, slightly startled and nodded. He began to make his way down the street and followed ignoring the curious looks from by standers. She was rather good at it, Gaara heard her making small comments and at a point singing... She was quiet amusing to listen to. Then she was quiet, which startled him a little, but he made no comment and kept walking. They were almost there now. Finally he stopped. She did as much and looked at the building. It looked very impressive. They entered and a man bowed to them and began walking through the place, she looked around, there were quiet a few people around, they seemed to be used to the Kazekage, but they stared at Emily as she passed. She shook her head and noticed they seemed to be heading for a staircase. She hestitated half a second when they got to the first step and then followed. There was only one table, and the place looked elegant, the large window was framed by blood red curtains, which matched the table cloth. She smiled as she realized it seemed to be Gaara-themed. She just sat in the chair offered to her by the man and numbly noticed Gaara ordering. The waiter asked what she would like and she asked for whatever Gaara had ordered. The waiter left and Gaara answered her unasked question. "I come here every week or two, whenever Temari and Kankuro force out of the office, I became rather fond of the food here, and the privacy as well" The green eyed girl just smiled and nodded. For a few minutes they just stared at each other in silence. It was a very realxing and comfortable silence. He said
"I thought you had forgotten, or turned your back on me", no acusation in his voice, just a statement. She smiled widely.
"Never, the only time you'll see my back is when I have to punch someone in front of you, but from what I hear, you got that covered." He smiled at her words. Really she made him smile so she began singing again
"So many new faces, familiar places. But I found the tracks to their hearts. All the people I already know, I hope they left with a place in their hearts, because they left with a place in my heart." She abruptly fell quiet, noticing his stare on her; apparently she had been singing to herself
"Sorry, I just had that song stuck in my head and..."
"Don´t apologize" he interrupted her " I quiet like your voice..." She cocked her head to a side and smiling, she said
"That´s not something I get everyday"
Suddenly conversation sprouted flowing quiet easily. Lunch was very animated, they both enjoyed themselves. When they had finished eating they kept talking, enjoying the sound of each other´s voice, hers sweet his apparently cold. Gaara suddenly asked Emily
"What is love" she stared at him and smiled. "If you want to know my answer meet me at midnight on the rooftop of the Kazekage tower" With that she got up and disappeared. Well that was a very unnerving change.
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There he was, waiting for her, and exactly at midnight she came a long box in her hands and a bag on her shoulder. "You should be more careful, you were too quiet for your own good, I could have killed you mistaking you for an attacker" Gaara spoke softly, his words lacing into the sentence smoothly as the wind itself. She smiled and without beating around the bush she said
"I don't mind, but here's my answer: love is a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person, a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person. Or so says the dictionary. To me love is like a glass rose, fragile and painful, but beautiful on the extreme,it's frail and yet so strong, love makes you smile and cry, it´s what makes you give up everything, love is what keeps me alive. And today it's time I share this gift with someone. I choose you to share this gift, with you because you deserve because love is more than a girl and a boy, or a fairytale ending, or a ring on your finger, when you love you can see it in each other's eyes, if you look at me right now you will know what I mean. Kind of, Gaara...you are..." she trailed off.
He looked at her and suddenly reached out stroking her hair and then pulled away. It felt strange in a pleasant way. He whispered
"I´m sorry, I can´t say the same, I´m still figuring things out"
She then said "I know. You know what will happen now don´t you?" he nodded and his hand brushed against hers and she smiled. She turned around and he watched as she walked away, not without giving him the box and disappeared once again into the street, just like she had so many years ago, but this time she left a quiet different feeling, and the certainty she would keep her promise. He opened the box and smiled a little. The glass had a strange glow in the moonlight... She wasn´t a princess and he wasn´t prince charming, it might not be a fairytale or a romance novel but it was their story. And that was all they needed for now.
Ok that was it. It may have a sequel-ish thing that will explain Emily's background. Also about the defintion of love, I DID look it up. I felt like I dropped quality as I moved through the fic, if you feel the same way tell me. I will try to fix it, and if you find any mistakes, please tell me so I can correct them. Mmmm about Hitomi getting so hurt with such a "small" hit, I was going to explain somewhere in there, she has this condition I guess that makes her really frail, but I´m lazy and I didn´t do it. If you want me to write it in, review and let me know. Specials thanks to Libby16 (formerly XSnowXPrincessX) ,TheRealGoodyTwoShoes,ArtemisKid, Kitsune Princess 911 and Tora No Musume for reviewing(yes if you review you'll be there) Please review, contructive criticism accepted, just please don't flame too hard, I have school and I don't want to smell like burnt bacon. The little song at the end, I DID NOT make up, who recognized it? Raise your hands...really? No one? Ugh, I strongly recommend it, it's called It's about time by One Night Only and I strongly recommend them to you, I will use their songs in further fanfics so watch out for them, and of course I do NOT own the lyrics or any other part of the song whatsoever. Also I´ll put the dates when I edit right here:
1st edition jan/22/2012 2nd edition jan/24/2012 3rd edition jan/25/2012(Here it was mainly gramatical, I only added a sentence or two) feb/1/2012 (again mainly grammar)feb/12/2012 haha last one I think mar/19/2012
Ok so that was the revised version. The sequel is my story "Kiss me slowly", it can also be seen as a one shot, but there might be athird part coming up. Like I said help me out with the mistakes.