A short character study from Mal's point of view.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I just play in the worlds others create.
Martyr
Simon has always been a martyr, Mal thinks suddenly. I'll bet he used to take the blame for River when they were kids too. Mal stares at River and for a long moment has no idea what to do. Kaylee is sobbing into Jayne's chest. The mercenary looks at Mal for support but all Mal can do is shrug, he has no answers for this. Jayne loops his arm around Kaylee's back and steers her towards the door. Mal brushes her arm as they pass but she doesn't acknowledge him.
Book is praying, and Mal wonders if River even hears the words as she sits beside Simon, her fingers running through his hair gently. She stares at his face as though that alone will make him open his eyes.
Martyr. The word echoes round Mal's head as he watches the scene in front of him. That was Simon. A martyr. Giving up everything he had for River. He'd given up his family, his career, and his whole life on a hunch that his sister was being hurt by the Academy and he walked away from it all easily. Because she was more important. Because he loved her.
Wash looks like he might cry, his face twisted. Zoë is stoic as ever, but holding Wash's hand so tight that her knuckles are pale. They stand as far back from Simon and River as they can in the impossibly small space of the infirmary.
River looks broken, Mal thinks. Because she loved him.
Only Inara stands beside River. She is tenderly wiping the blood off River's knuckles with a cloth. River doesn't even seem to notice. Just keeps staring at Simon like her whole world has fallen around her ears. Maybe it has. Mal doesn't know right now. One little slip of a girl in a big bad 'verse and Mal can't quite figure who she is now. Because this little slip of a girl just killed four men. With nothing more than Jayne's knife, snatched from his belt with a scream. Jayne had no chance at stopping her.
Mal shifts his gaze to Simon. His once-white shirt is mostly red now, sticking to his body wetly, glistening sickly under the stark infirmary lights.
Inara lets River's hand drop and steps back, the blood all gone now. She meets Mal's eyes. That could have been anyone of them laying on that table riddled with holes. No actually it couldn't, pardoning any bad luck. Simon stepped into the path of those bullets. They were meant for River and he took them instead. Six bullets to the chest. River strokes his cheek, strangely unbloodied. Simon the martyr. Mal can still hear Kaylee's scream from beside him as he'd pushed her head down to stop her seeing. Too late. River didn't scream, she roared. And for a minute even Mal had been a little afraid. Simon seemed to take eternity to fall, blown back by the force of the shots. His mouth moved but if he said anything none but River heard it. Then he died. And River went wild, and four men were dead in a matter of a minute. A strange balletic grace to murder, which had the crew staring at River's blood-soaked figure with fear. But inside she's just a little girl watching her brother's blood drying to a crusty dark red from the scarlet it had been.
Mal can't stand it any longer. "River."
She looks up with dead eyes. "He is gonna wake up soon." She smiles at Simon's face.
"No River he isn't."
She frowns at Mal momentarily. "He is. He's got to."
"River he's dead."
Her whole face freezes and she just stares at Mal, and then slowly turns her head to Simon. "Martyr," she says slowly. "That's who you think he was."
She leaps to her feet and flies at Mal, catching him by surprise. She thumps her fists into his chest. "He is more than that!"
Mal catches her hands and holds them away from him. "Being a martyr ain't always a bad thing River! Just makes him a little stupider, or braver than the rest of us."
River struggles against his grip. "Captain would be a martyr for Inara!"
Mal lets his gaze travel to the Companion, who along with Wash, Zoë and Book, is staring at him.
"Maybe I would. I don't want to have to find out River." Then Mal pulls his eyes from Inara's, and drags the struggling girl against him in a crushing hug. River bursts into tears. Mal just holds her tightly.
"I don't want to have a martyr for a brother," she hiccups into Mal's chest. "I just want a brother."
Yes, Mal thinks, Simon was a martyr and whatever he told River, it was not a good thing. Because martyrs are always dead.