"Baby, we have to go shopping, okay?" I said, and sat in the car. "Okay mommy" was all she replied. When we got there, she ran to the carts, and waited for me. As soon as I got one out, she climbed up in it, and sat down. I just laughed at her.
I looked at the shopping list as we entered the store. "Milk, eggs, apples..." I whispered to myself, before I heard his voice. I froze, and listened closer, before I told Aimee to stay, exactly where she was, (at that time not considering she was in a shopping cart) I ran around the big shelves, only to find that he was already gone. I shook my head, it was probably only in there, he was. What would he be doing here?
I went back to Aimee, and smiled at her. She just smiled back at me, without asking what I was doing, just a moment ago.
We got the stuff we needed, went to the checkpoint and went back to the car. I could have sworn I saw him, getting into a car, just a second ago. I shook my head once more, and started the radio.
"It's time to look back at some memories, don't you think?" one of the radio hosts asked the other. "I totally agree with you!" was her answer. "Sheila Thomas, with City Lights!"
"Mommy! It's your song!" Aimee said happily. "I know baby" I laughed. She was so proud, when she heard my old music.
We arrived home, waiting for the gates to open, when the song ended.
"It's been awhile since we've heard anything from Sheila, isn't it?" the host then said. You could hear an agreeing mumbling from the other host. I just sighed. "Isn't it crazy how everybody thought her songs, was about that Tokio Hotel bassist, Georg, and all of a sudden she just cheate..." I quickly turned the radio off, before Aimee registred anything.
We got all the way up to the house, and Aimee helped me carry all the things inside. She climbed her way on the kitchen island, and played with her blocks, when we got in, as I put everything in it's place. I quickly glanced over there, and saw the word "Mom" written, with the building blocks.
"Mommy?" she asked, with a bit of sadness in her voice. I turned to look at her, and noticed the word "Dad" She'd picked that up from tv. She'd heard it, and saw the happy family, mommy daddy, and their children, so it didn't take long before she understood, and started asking for her daddy. - "yeah?" "Where's daddy?" she asked. I sighed, and walked over to pick her up. I placed her on my hip, kissed her on the forehead, and said "Daddy's not here babe. It's just you and me... Daddy's not here" I think she heard a bit of sadness in my voice, "Do you miss him?" she asked, and hugged me. "Every day" I said.
I know that it all sounded like I told her, her father was dead, and that's a bad thing. I didn't. I just never told her where, or who he was. It was better that way. He didn't even know he had a daughter.
"You've been so crazy lately? You eat like a pig, you've got crazy mood swings, you're mad every morning?" Gustav asked. "Yeah, because I puke every second morning!" I replied. It was only 8am and I wasn't in the mood for this. "You're pregnant?!" he exclaimed looking at me. "No ofcourse not! Why would I be tha... Oh my God, this just isn't happening!" I panicked, as I realized all the signs, - "Ah ah! No way. Georg is so not ready, to be a father! He's a rockstar!" "So are you!" "He's only 20! I'm only 18! Jesus Christ Gustav! I'm 18, and pregnant!" "Sheila, chill! We'll go get a test, to be sure, first of all, okay?" he said. I nodded, and tried to relax, but I could still feel my heart racing. "Come on"
We walked towards the front door, and as Gustav was about to open it, Bill, Tom and Georg came in. As usually Tom went straight to the kitchen.
"Where are you going?" Georg asked and kissed me hello. "Oh, ehh... To the store... To get some milk" I said, trying not to sound too suspicious. "We've got milk?" Tom said, as he walked back to us, drinking milk (From the carton!) "Not anymore!" Gustav said, a bit panicking, and knocked it out of his hands, and spilled it out over the floor.
"Can you clean that up? We'll get some more" he quickly said, took a grab in my arm, and pulled me out the door, closing it behind us. All that, to try not to sound suspicious!
We walked to my car, and drove to the store. As soon as we got back home, Gustav ran to the kitchen with the milk, and I ran to the toilet. He'd bought me 4 Rockstar Energy's to drink in the car, and I really had to pee now.
- Positive.
I went straight outside, and lit a cigarette.

"Mommy? Are you okay?" Aimee asked. I quickly shook my head, and blinked a few times. "Yeah, I'm fine"

I was just watching tv, I was preparing to get up, to get Aimee away from her beloved bass, and to get her in bed... I just didn't feel like getting up. All of a sudden the phone rang, and I couldn't help but wonder, who called now.
"Sheila here" I said, as I picked it up. "Sheila! Honey! How are you?" I heard David Jost, my old manager, say. "Wow, hi. I'm fine... Why?" I asked. He was so upset, when I decided to quit the music buisness. I'd never had such a big fight with anyone... Well, except Georg.
"I need to talk to you! It's huge!" he said. I didn't reply, I just waited for him to continue. - "Lunch tomorrow. 12pm, at Lucky Café, downtown" he then said. "Okay then" I mumbled, and hung up. He always had crazy ideas, and he wouldn't leave me alone, before I'd heard him out.
Aimee joined me in the couch after a while, and and we fell asleep. None of us felt like getting up, and when she fell asleep, resting her head on my arm, I decided that the couch was okay, for the night.
The next morning, we got up at about 9am, to get ready. Aimee was luckily big enough to take on her own clothes. I just had to get it out of the closet for her, then I had enough time, to get ready myself.
I quickly decided on some ripped skinny jeans, a black, a bit short top, my leather jacket and my biker boots. My makeup wasn't anything special either, just standard smokey eyes, and afterwards I teased my hair a bit.
Aimee was almost dressed herself, but she needed a little help with the socks. She wasn't very girly, about her clothing. Jeans, a band t-shirt and a brown leather jacket. She looked like her father, when she wore that... Especially with her long brown hair.

"Georg, we need to talk" I said, and opened the door to his room. He went in there, with a worried look on his face. I sat down on the bed, and he next to me. I looked at him. The guy I loved. The guy who I was going to miss so much. "We need to end this" I said, and the tears started running down my face. "What? What do you mean?" he asked, and looked at me with a very anxious face. "We... I... I have to break up with you" I said, and looked at the floor. I couldn't believe I was doing this.
"What?! Why?!" he asked, also starting to cry. "I... I'm pregnant, you're a rockstar! I'm having a kid, and it's not going to grow up, on the road!" I said, trying to sound like a really wanted it to end. "You're pregnant?! What about your career?" he asked, a bit more calm, but still sobbing. "I'll end my career" "Well, so can I?" "Georg, it's not yours!" I all of a sudden claimed. He just looked at me. He looked like he didn't know if he was gonna break down crying, or if he was gonna puke. I just ran out of there, my face filled with tears.
As I was running down the street, Gustav caught up with me, and told me to stop for a second.
"What did you do?! Georg's at home, refusing to leave his room, crying like never before, not saying a word!" he looked very worried. "I broke up with him... Told him that I was pregnant, and that the kid isn't his" "What?!" he exclaimed. "He was gonna end his career! That would split up the band, ruin it for the rest of you guys! I'm not gonna ruin it for you!" I said, and the tears started to come back,- "I have to go... I got to get my stuff, before I go" "Where are you going?" "My brother's picking me up in L.A... I'm moving to the U.S... I have to get away" as I turned around to leave, he grabbed my arm, once more, and pulled me in for a hug. "Remember, I'm always here for you" he whispered.

"Are you ready?" I asked, and I heard her running down the stairs. That was a yes.
We went in, and found David at a table.
"What's so important?" I asked. "Well, hi. Nice to see you too. I'm fine, thanks for asking" he said, getting up, and pulling out a chair for me, taking a look at Aimee, to see if she needed a chair. She was in my arms, sitting on my hip. "Damn, she's grown" he said. "Yeah... That's what people do, when you don't see them for four years" I said, waiting for him to tell me, what was so important. I sat down to wait.
"Fine, I'll cut straight to it. You. Aimee. Europe, three concerts, three interviews, what do you say?" I just looked at him, with that big NO in my eyes. - "I've had people calling, for the last five years, asking if you'd play there, do an interview here, and asking when you were coming back. Please Sheila... It's the WSMO (Working single mother organisation) who called... You're single, a mom and it would be work? Come on!" "But David..." I just got to say, before I was interrupted, - "I wanna see mommy work!" Aimee said laughing, and my chance to say no was gone, - "When are we leaving?" I sighed "Tomorrow morning" he said. I looked at him, asking him, with my eyes, whether he was crazy or not, but he just smiled. We talked about what was gonna happen, as we had lunch, and Aimee got more and more excited.
"Aimee, we have a lot of packing to do" I said, as we sat in the car.
We spend the whole day packing. Aimee fell asleep on her suitcase, around 8pm. It'd been a hard day. I finished packing, and sat down at my desk. I just sat there for a while, staring out in the air, before I opened the first drawer and took out an old photo. I couldn't help myself from smiling. It was an old picture, from the summer holidays 2006, home in Germany. Me and Georg, to the left. Gustav in the middle, Tom to the right, next to Bill, and David in the front, on his knees. I kept smiling as I laid the photo back in the drawer, and found my song book. I looked through the old songs. "City Lights, Jet Lag, Can't keep my hands of you, I can wait forever, etc." all songs, I wrote about Georg. I dried my eyes, and went to the back of the book, found my new songs, and took a look at them. Maybe I didn't sing anymore, but I couldn't stop writing.
I woke up the next day, when it knocked on my door. I'd fallen asleep at my desk.
"Yeah yeah yeah! I'm coming!" I yelled, and let him in. "Ready?" he asked. I nodded a bit insecure, and looked towards the couch, where I placed Aimee last night, but only to find that she was gone. "Shit!" I yelled, and ran back into the living room.
"Aimee? Aimee! Aimee!?" I got to yell, before David bursted out laughing. "She's in her room, I think... Playing bass?" he then said, as he was looking up the stairs. I listened for a second, and clearly heard the bass. Why didn't it surprise me?
"Aimee, you have to get dressed!" I yelled, up the stairs. "Okay mommy!" she yelled back, before she came running down the stairs, still in her pyjamas. "Get dressed, okay babe?" "Okay mommy"
I'd placed her clothes in the other end of the couch, last night, so it was ready.
"Ready to go?" I asked her, as I placed the last suitcase in the car. "Yeah... Wait!.. Can I bring my bass?" she asked. I smiled at her, and nodded. I had to go back in, and get my guitar anyway.
Afterwards we headed to the airport.