Disclaimers: Andrew W. Marlowe does such a wonderful job of writing 'Castle' that I know I couldn't do any better, but it's fun to take the characters out and play.

Title: Decompressing

Summary: This is a post-Still story, which was my favorite episode of Season 5. It takes place immediately after the tag. It's rated M because as someone pointed out to me, Kate Beckett's decompression after standing on a bomb all day while Castle stood helplessly by would almost certainly include sex.

A/N: While this is my first 'Castle' fan fiction story, I've been writing and posting fan fiction stories for the 1970's police show 'The Rookies' for over 10 years. Please read and review.

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Kate Beckett had read somewhere before that when you're in a life or death situation, your life flashes before your eyes. Standing on that metal plate all afternoon, she'd found that to be so very true. Her partner of four years, Richard Castle, had stayed by her side all afternoon. His love for her refused to let him leave. Even if it meant he died with her if the bomb went off. He'd made her laugh over reminders of their previous escapades together. He was doing everything to keep her distracted. To keep her from thinking 'what if?'

Their relationship extended beyond the usual cop partnership. For one thing, Richard Castle wasn't a cop. He was a best-selling crime novelist who'd been shadowing her for four years now. At first it was for the purpose of researching a new character that he was writing. Over time their relationship had evolved from research to friendship. The previous May it had finally blossomed into a full-fledged sexual partnership. She had shown up at his doorstep, soaking wet, and everything had fallen together. It was the most perfect relationship that she'd ever been in. She could no longer imagine a life without this quirky, funny, egotistical, incredibly sexy man in it.

Now her life was literally balancing on whether Castle had found the right password to disarm the bomb. As she watched him staring at his SmartPhone, she wasn't even aware that she was holding her breath. He glanced at her as she cautiously stepped forward. When nothing blew up, she raced into Castle's arms as he held her tightly against him.

***CCC***

At the precinct later, she was debriefed by Capt. Victoria Gates and congratulated by the other members of the 12th Precinct, including Javier Esposito and Kevin Ryan, the other members of her homicide team. They laughed and teased her about her close call, but as time passed, she suddenly felt very tired.

"Hey Beckett, how about next time we send the bomb squad in first?" Espo teased her as he raised his cup of coffee toward her.

"I agree," Ryan nodded. "I say that we avoid bombs in buildings at all costs. I mean, first Beckett has her apartment blow up and now this? Here's to an anti-bomb pact," he looked to Castle to throw in his two cents worth. After all, Castle usually had a witticism for everything.

But, for once Castle had nothing to say. Looking across at his partner and girlfriend, he could tell that she'd had enough for one day. He wanted to take her home so that she could decompress and come down from the horrors of that afternoon. While she was an exceptionally tough homicide detective, he'd also discovered that like most women, she had a vulnerable side.

"Beckett, could I see you for a second?" He walked up to her desk and leaned down to ask her.

"What's on your mind, Castle?" She gave him that teasing smile that was only meant for him.

"Castle, come on!" Esposito razzed him. "I know that Gates told Beckett to kiss the man, but she's already done that!"

Kate got up and walked toward the break room as she turned to look at her team. "We'll be back."

"Hey, bro?" Esposito looked over at his partner. "Since Gates admitted plausible deniability, does that mean that everybody knows now?"

"No more secrets," Ryan concurred.

"It kind of takes the fun out of their relationship, doesn't it?"

"I don't think so," Ryan smiled.

Back in the break room, Castle took Kate's hands in his. "How are you holding up?"

"I'm relieved," she admitted. "I'm . . . too many things that I can't admit here, Castle."

"You've had enough, huh?" He rested his forehead against hers. Since Gates' revelation earlier, it no longer mattered to him who saw them.

"Yeah, I've had enough," she brushed her thumb along his hand, her signal that she was kissing him and running her hand through his hair.

"That's still the best handshake ever," he smiled as he noticed the tears forming in her eyes. "I'm going to take you out of here and get you home."

"Will you stay?"

"Always," he smiled again. "Come on, let's go."

After saying their goodbyes to the gang and Kate profusely thanking the bomb squad once again, they got into the elevator and left the precinct. After going to the parking garage, he takes the keys to Beckett's Crown Victoria and helps her inside before going over to the driver's side and getting behind the wheel. After adjusting everything to his liking, he left the garage and pulled into mid-afternoon traffic. "Are we going to the loft?" She asked as she leaned her head against the window.

"I thought your place might be better. No interruptions from my mother or Alexis," he smiled down at her as he planted a kiss on her forehead.

"No interruptions sounds nice," she lazily stroked his chest as he continued holding her.

"Are you hungry? Do you want to stop on the way?"

"No," she shook her head. "We can order something later. I just need to be with you. I just . . . "

He didn't say anything, but Castle understood exactly what she was trying to tell him. She'd been suffering from PTSD for almost two years now. She'd been seeing a psychiatrist to help her with things that could trigger the episodes. Several things over the last two years had acted as triggers. Being shot at her former captain's funeral had started the whole thing. She'd almost died, but had come back more stubborn and determined than ever. The night that she'd come to him in the middle of a rainstorm, proclaiming that she just wanted him. He learned that she'd almost fallen from a rooftop to her death. Only Kevin Ryan grabbing her at the last minute had saved her. That had triggered the worst episodes yet. There were nights when she woke up crying out from nightmares where she called for him and he never came.

Something told him that what had happened today was also going to trigger her PTSD. Standing on a bomb which was set to explode in half an hour would be enough to give anybody post-traumatic stress. As he made his way through late afternoon traffic, Castle couldn't wait to get her home and help her decompress. All he could give her was himself, but she could have as much of him as she wanted.

He pulled into the parking garage of her building and pulled into her spot before getting out and helping her out of the car. Noticing that she was now more than a little unsteady on her feet, he tightened his arm around her as they walked past the doorman into the building and over to the elevator. When they reached her floor, he led her to her apartment and held out his hand. "Give me your keys," he instructed her as she gave him a funny look.

She handed him the keys as he unlocked the door and opened it before scooping her up in his arms. "Castle!" She protested as he walked over and deposited her on the sofa before collapsing beside her.

"I think today made me glad that I'm not a real cop," he commented as he pulled her feet into his lap and removed her boots.

"We've been through some rough scrapes, but today . . . "

"Yeah, today . . . "

"Rick, thank you for making me laugh. But, I really want to thank you for not leaving me."

"I told you that I wasn't leaving," he reminded her. "Kate, did you mean what you said in there today? When you said . . . "

She moved up so that she was on his lap as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I meant every word of it. I love you, Rick Castle."

"I know those words have been hard for you to say," he brushed her hair from her shoulders as his lips sought hers.

After the kiss ended she settled more comfortably into his lap as his arms lightly encircled her waist, keeping her close but not suffocating her. "Can we just sit like this for a while?" She asked, resting her head on his shoulder.

"For as long as you want to."

Just then her cell phone rang, causing her to jump in his arms. She got up and picked up the phone. "It's my dad. I need to take this," she looked at Castle as he nodded in understanding. "Hi, daddy."

"Katie, I got your message. What's going on? You sounded funny. Are you okay?" Jim Beckett's warm, familiar voice came over the line.

"Yeah, dad. I'm okay. I didn't mean to worry you. I just had a strange day. I just wanted . . . I just wanted you to know that . . . I . . . " her voice broke as Castle started to get up, but she waved him down. "It was just one of those days where you kind of see your life flash in front of you, but I'm okay now. I'm home in one piece."

"Do you need me to come over, Katie? We could grab some dinner and talk."

"No, I'm okay. Castle's here with me. But, I'd love to get together Sunday for brunch."

"Sunday for brunch it is. Our usual spot at 11?"

"Eleven's great," she smiled.

"Tell Castle to take good care of my girl," he said as Kate smiled.

"I will. I love you, daddy."

"I love you too, pumpkin. I'll see you Sunday."

"How's your father?" Castle asked as she ended the call and put her phone on vibrate.

"He's good. He told me to tell you to take good care of me," she smiled shyly as she walked back over to the sofa.

"Is that one of those messages that I'd better take good care of you or he'll kill me?" She laughed at the look on his face. Laughter that quickly dissolved into tears as he immediately pulled her into his arms. "Hey, don't cry! I was joking! Your dad and I get along great. I don't think he'd ever kill me."

"I was so scared, Castle," she sobbed in his arms. "In all the time that I've been doing this job, I don't think I've ever been that scared."

"That makes two of us," he admitted as he continued holding her. "I thought that I was going to lose you."

"Me, too," she reached up to touch his face as she moved closer. "I need you so badly right now. I need to know that I'm really all right."

As he stared down into her beautiful hazel eyes, Rick Castle's mind flashed back to all of the times they'd had sex over the past 11 months. They'd had wild sex, slow sex, sex on almost every available surface in both his apartment and hers'. But in his mind, there was sex and there was making love. And every time their bodies joined together was special. He reached down to interlace her fingers with his own as he led her toward her bedroom. She smiled as she remembered back to that first night when she'd taken his hand and led him toward his bedroom.

Standing by her bed, Castle slowly unbuttoned her blouse and pulled it opened. Staring at her intently, he traced the small round scar between her breasts with his fingers. That scar was a constant reminder of how close they'd come to being permanently pulled apart almost two years before. He pulled her into his arms as he kissed that one spot on her neck that turned her into putty in his hands. "Oh, Castle," she breathed as she kneaded his shoulders and upper back.

His lips moved to claim hers, his tongue seeking entrance. She always tasted so good. He thought that he could get addicted just from the taste of her. Not to mention that she always smelled like cherries. He'd noticed it when they first started working together. Still feasting on her mouth, he pulled her blouse off of her shoulders before going to work on her bra.

After letting her bra fall to the floor, he moved her down to the bed and knelt down beside her. "Feeling better?" She smiled up at him as he traced a line down her naked torso with his finger, causing her skin to break out in goose bumps.

"Not quite," she pulled him back down toward her as they began kissing once again. He was by far the best kisser she'd ever been with. But then, she'd found that he was extremely talented in all aspects of lovemaking. Not that she was exactly a slouch. They'd both managed to surprise each other in that department many times over.

He reached down and unbuttoned the top of her jeans before slipping his hand inside. He could feel the warmth and the arousal of her through her panties as she moaned her approval. She pressed herself against his hand, letting him know that she wanted more of his touch. "Castle," she let out a disappointed whimper when he removed his hand from the inside of her pants and moved toward her feet.

"Shhh," he put a finger to her lips. "You've had a rough day, remember? Let me take care of you."

To Kate, nothing had ever sounded sweeter or sexier in her life. She was more than happy to let him take care of her. He'd been taking care of her all day, ever since she'd stepped on that metal plate and heard that ominous whirring, clicking sound. The sound that told her if she moved a muscle, she'd die. Castle had been her rock all day. She wasn't sure she would've made it through that horrible ordeal if it hadn't been for him.

Rick stood up and finished unfastening her pants as he tugged them down her legs, followed by her panties and the dark socks that she'd been wearing underneath the heavy boots. "Are your legs sore?" He asked as he began a gentle massage of her calves.

"A little," she admitted as she gasped under the pressure of his strong fingers on her legs. "That feels so good, Castle."

After massaging her legs, he moved down to her feet, massaging her entire foot as she closed her eyes and felt herself beginning to relax. Capt. Gates had told her during her debriefing that she'd probably need to take a day or two off to decompress. If this was her idea of decompressing, she agreed wholeheartedly.

After the foot massage, he moved up to her thighs, massaging each one slowly and exquisitely as she fought to keep still. His hands parted her legs and moved slowly up as she opened her eyes and smiled at him. He gave her a grin in return that was like that of a child who'd gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar. She loved that Castle grin. It was so damn cute! Instead of touching her where she wanted him to, he crawled back up her body, wrapping his arms around her. His erection pressed deliciously against her center as his lips claimed hers once again. She reached out to unbutton his shirt as he stopped her seeking hands. "Uh-uh," he warned against her mouth. "I'm taking care of you, remember?"

"Does your taking care of me involve you getting naked, by any chance?"

"Soon," he promised as he moved down to her breasts, teasing first one nipple and then the other in his teeth as she couldn't suppress the moan that escaped from her lips. To Castle, listening to Kate expressing her desires was the sweetest, sexiest sound in the world.

Kate trembled in anticipation as she felt Castle moving further south, circling her belly button with his tongue before finally going where she'd wanted him to be all along. She clawed at her sheets as she felt him between her legs, his lips, tongue, and fingers doing extraordinary things to her senses. While it was true that she knew a few tricks that involved ice cubes, the tricks that Castle could do had proven to be nothing short of mind-blowing.

"Rick! Castle! Oh, fuck! Yes!" Her cries went on and on as she felt her inner muscles tightening as he slowed down his licking and nibbling to give her a chance to return to her senses.

She was still trying to come down to earth as she felt Castle's now very naked body covering her own. "Are you ready for more?" She opened her eyes, grinning into his blue-eyed gaze.

"Oh, yeah," she pulled him down for a kiss as he entered her slowly, much too slowly for her tastes, but he'd told her that he was taking care of her.

Things didn't stay slow for long. They rolled around her bed, both trying to take control of the other. While Rick Castle might've liked having rough sex against hard surfaces, like walls and doors, Kate Beckett definitely liked being on top. But, Castle was most definitely okay with that. As Kate liked telling people, he liked to touch things, and one of the things that he liked touching the most these days was his extremely sexy, smart girlfriend. He held onto her hips as she set the pace for both of them. By the sounds and the movements that she was making, he sensed that she was extremely close. As was he. He just needed to feel her tightening around him and he'd be gone. He reached his hand up to where their bodies were joined and touched her. She grabbed his hands and put them on her breasts as she threw her head back as she felt all of those muscles on the inside of her flutter and convulse around him as he joined her in his own climax just seconds later.

She collapsed onto his chest as she felt his arms come around her and hold her, his fingers lightly caressing her bare back as she came down from the incredible high that was sex with Richard Castle.

"That was . . . wow," Castle breathed in her ear as he continued holding her.

Untangling herself from his body as he groaned in disappointment, Kate cuddled close to his side as he slipped his arm around her once again. "Gates suggested that I take a day or two off," she looked up at him. "She said that I might need to decompress after what happened today."

"Oh, is that what the kids are calling it these days?" He teased as she laughed. "I'll help you decompress in any way you need me to."

"Rick?" He turned toward her as her eyes got serious. It was rare that she called him by his first name. To her, he was always just 'Castle,' even now that they were intimate. "I'm glad that you were there today. Thank you."

"You're very welcome," he kissed her forehead. "Get some sleep. I love you, Kate."

"Me, too," she smiled sleepily as she cuddled as close as she could get to him and drifted off, hopefully into a sleep where there were no bombs under her feet.

A/N: Writing this, I almost felt like a fan fiction virgin although I've been doing this since I was 12 years old, way before the Internet. It felt strange but good to write fan fiction for a different set of characters. I hope that I did them justice. As for the sex, sometimes my scenes are good and other times they're hit or miss. I hope this scene was the former and not the latter. Please read and review. I seriously need to have my ego stroked.