私の接吻の楽園 Mai Icha Icha Paradaisu: My Makeout Paradise
You know what I've been thinking...it's been a long time since Jiraiya got laid. But don't worry, this story isn't going to be all sex (sorry to those who were hoping for that), Jaraiya's gonna need to work for it XD.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters in it. Seiteki is mine all mine, though!!!
"UGH!!! That Naruto's gonna be the death of me!" The snow-haired sage said as he slammed open the door to the bar. "I didn't even get to do any 'research,'" he whined. "How am I supposed to write a sequal to Makeout Paradise if I can't find any inspiration?"
The Barkeep came over to take his order. He got a sake...a large sake. He was half-way through the bottle when something caught his eye, a little inspiration. She was quite a sight! Her feet were propped on the table as she sipped her sake and read her book. Adorned with a long sleeve black mini dress with a plunging kneckline held together at the waist by a red sash. The look was perfectly complete with the fishnets and sand village head band tied around her right thigh. He couldn't take his eyes off the brunette vixen; she was a goddess! (and couldn't be a day over 25!) He followed her lustful gaze down to the book in her hand. He nearly screamed with excitement when he saw what it was: MAKEOUT PARADISE!!!!! He couldn't believe such a beautiful woman was a fan of his work. Nothing would make her happier than to get my autograph, he thought with an evil smirk
"Hi," Jiraiya greeted her in his smoothest voice. "I couldn't help but notice the book you were reading." She snickered. "Yeah, I guess I shouldn't be reading porn in public." She broke her stare from the book and looked up at Jiraiya with her ocean blue eyes. "Oh my god," she gasped. "You're Jiraiya!" He had gotten what he wanted.
"So you heard of my work?" he teased.
"Yeah, and your reputation."
Touche. He was left speechless. After a long pause, Jiraiya was finally able to speak again. "So...you gotta name?" "As a matter of fact, I do," she cooed. "It's Seiteki." Oh my fucking god! Jiraiya quickly spun around to whipe the drool from his lips. Here name is SEXY. I mean it literally means sexy!!! I almost got a boner just hearing her say it! These thoughts ran through his mind as he checked his pants for any unwanted buldges. "Uh...are you okay?" she stuttered. He whipped himself again so he could face her. "Yeah, everythings fine, I just thought I heard someth-"
"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY!! PERVY SAGE!!!" the peircing scream was heard through the whole bar. "Naruto." Jiraiya growled. "Hey! You're supposed to be helping me with my training!" Jiraiya was twitching with anger. "Can't you see I'm busy!!!" he shouted. Naruto was about to retaliate when the laughter of Seiteki broke up this little spat. "I can see your very busy Jiraiya, I'll just let you go." "NO!" he shouted. Seiteki seemed shocked yet flattered by this little outburst. Luckly for the sage, she caved. "Fine," she sighed. "I'll give you the address to the place where I'm staying at." She took out a pen, quickly jotted down her address, and strutted, litterally strutted, out of the bar.
Jiraiya had a smirk on his face the whole time she was walking out. I loved it when she was here, but I still love to watch her go. "HEY! Quit staring at her ass, we've got work to do!" Naruto yelled at him. "Hey! I'm the one that calls the shots here! Now come on, you want to work so badly, let's do it!" They both walked out of the bar, finally bringing some peace to the others sitting in there. "Who was that hotty, anyways?" Naru-kun inquired. "SHUT UP!!! It's none of your business!!!!"
Jiraiya returned home, half asleep and going crazy. Naruto had worked him to the bone today. All he wanted to do was take a shower and go to sleep. In the bathroom, steam was fogging the mirror, and all Jiraiya could find himself doing was looking down at his hand. I wonder if she's still awake, he kept thinking, but do I still have enough energy for sexings...HECK YES I DO!
He made his desicision and off he went in search of her. The place was easy to find, he was there within minutes. He waited in the tears, outside her window, looking in threw the open balchony door. She looked so beautiful in her little camisol and boy shorts (and without a bra). He's breathing became eratic. Seiteki twitched and a shurikan landed right near his head, stabbed in the tree. He jumped out, shurikan in hand, and threw the blade on the floor. "You can put someone's eye out with this," he joked. "Oh, Jiraiya, it's you." Her voice was like music to his ears. Oh if only I could hear you screaming my name, he impurely thought.
"So, why are you here?" she asked.
He smiled. "I'm here for you."
"Well, I'm flattered," she cooed. "But I'm afraid you can't have all of me."
Jiraiya was, without a doubt, disapointed. "Why not?" he asked, trying not to whine. She slinked up to him and pressed her body up against him. "Because," she whispered in his ear, "I don't want you to get bored." Seiteki kissed him lightly on the cheek and walked off to her bedroom. "How about you pick me up tomorrow at seven." She closed the door and latched it behind her. Still upset but not wanting to impose, left from the balchony, and headed in the direction of the bar.
Sitting at the bar, a sullen look on his face and a beer in his hand, Jiraiya wanted nothing more than to head to the brothl. But he wouldn't, he couldn't, he didn't want to. All he wanted was Seiteki and it was tearing him up inside (and he was "turning blue"). Bells jingled as the bar door was openned by a familiar masked leaf shinobi. Jiraiya looked into the eye of Kakashi.
Kakashi winced, "you don't look so good, man."
"I don't feel so good."
"Ooooh. got a little to busy tonight?"
"Shut it! I haven't even done that tonght!"
"YIKES! No wonder you feel so crappy."
Jiraiya hid his head in his folded arms and beganto groan. "Why? Why am I going so insane over this one girl? I have a date with her tomorrow and I know I'm not going to be getting any but I still want to see her." Kakashi lifted up his depressed friends head and looked him straight in the eyes. "Jiraiya," he said, "i think you're in love."
So, that's the end of chapter one. Betcha didn't guess that Jiraiya was even capable of actual love. I always took him for the love at first sight kinda guy. More chapters are on their way, so just wait.