Hello, fellow Primeval fans. It's been a while, pretty much 2 years, since I've last uploaded a bit and a lot has happened since then. I started to study and worked for half a year in between and from this September on I will be studying again, which is why hopefully there will be some time for writing fan fiction.

But enough about me, enjoy reading this story instead and if you like, leave a review. Greetings from Germany :)

Recovering

It was the kind of memories that you would never be able to put past you. The kind of memory which you wish to erase from your mind so they wouldn't haunt you anymore. About half a week ago the anomaly team had returned from their mission in Peru and Connor had not been sleeping well. That was, if he even got to sleep. He had counted four and a half hours he couldn't recollect what he was doing in the last 72 hours, although that just might be because he was going mad by now. But every time his eyes closed and he drifted away his subconscious he could hear the screams of those villagers back in South America that now where dead. Those poor souls whose flesh had been torn and whose bones were crushed, only to be eaten alive by a pack of hungry Thylacosmilus. The sound of the distorted cries of pain and agony echoing back from the mountains were probably engraved in his brain forever.

His bloodshot eyes directed at the ADD's screen, he leaned his head in the palms of his hands, his elbows resting on the desktop. He was slowly falling asleep again until his head slipped and hit the table in front of him. He groaned in a mix of pain and frustration of being woken up again. A look at the clock told him nothing good either, since the team's shift was far from over. Figuring he might as well give it a try to at least appear awake, he got up to make his way over to the recreation area, more specifically the vending machine. At least it seemed like nobody noticed his slip-up. It would have made him uncomfortable, because everyone else looked fine to him. Even though Abby for example had to watch Blaine, the SAS soldier who saved her life, bleed to death in her arms she just kept going. Connor admired her for this, wondering if some day he would possess the mental strength to live through those kinds of moments and live on afterwards in some form unscathed.

Stephen was his cool and little bit distant self he had always been since the incident with Cutter's ex-wife Helen. The professor himself buried himself in his work with the anomalies to a degree that may not be really healthy, but then again that wasn't anything new either. Jenny mostly kept to herself with few exceptions to visit Cutter or deliver reports to Lester. Connor himself felt like the weakest link once again and cursed himself for not being able to not care. The rational part of his mind knew there hadn't been any chance for him to help those men and women. Yet his guts still twisted every time he thought back to how helpless he felt. A small part of him also wondered with sick curiosity why he found the screams worse than seeing the mutilated corpses in the crushing silence after the storm. Shaking the unpleasant thought off he took the energy drink he bought from the machine and opened it. Maybe the caffeine could help keeping him going just a little longer until the day at the Anomaly Research Center was over. That and hopefully enough luck to not have an anomaly alert today.

"This can't be very healthy now, can it?" A stern voice called out to him.

Just having opened the can, Conner turned around in surprise to face his boss, Sir James Lester. It wasn't often that he made his way out office to talk to any of the team and almost never he entered the recreation area. Actually, the paleontology student couldn't think of even one time it had happened before, which was exactly why Lester was the last person he expected to meet here. Anyway, this train of thought in his deranged state had taken Connor long enough for the older man to come over and wait for an answer with his infamous raised eyebrows.

"What can't be?" he simply replied, still not catching on.

Lester shook his head at Connor's cluelessness. "I am speaking of your apparently limitless consumption of beverages containing highly concentrated caffeine."

"Why would you assume I drink a lot of this stuff?"

This time he was answered with a sigh. "Mr. Temple, nothing in these hallowed halls happens without me knowing about it. And you have been spending enough of your money here that you have me pondering the idea of paying you with fancy cans like those instead of a check."

Not really in the mood for the sarcastic humor, he took a sip of his drink. "And why would that concern you?"

"Because, Mr. Temple, as supervisor of the anomaly research project I am obligated to ensure that everyone is working at the maximum of his or her capacities. However, you are clearly still exhausted after the trip to Peru last week. You are barely holding together like it is. I suggest that you make your way home and get a good amount of rest in order for you to be productive again."

Wondering if this didn't turn out to be a dream after all, Connor asked "Are you giving me the day off?"

Seemingly appalled, Lester shook his head. "No, I am telling you to take the rest of the day off and recover yourself to work at full force again. Have I made myself clear?"

"Yes, thank you." Was the tired, but honest reply.

As Connor turned to go, his boss spoke once more. "One more thing, Mr. Temple. I have read the reports about Peru. If you have trouble sleeping, go see the ARC's medical station. There is medication to solve problems of that manner."

With those words he went back to his office above the ARC's main room while Connor took off in the other direction, wondering if he was that easy to read. He hadn't used sleeping pills in a long time and he wasn't exactly looking forward to doing so again. Without a doubt they work and really make you sleep better, but it's not the rest he was looking for. While they may cure his physical exhaustion, Connor was more anxious about his mental well-being. As he reached the medical station's entrance he got rid of his ideas of going to see a psychologist or something similar. He told himself he wasn't crazy yet. And until anybody else got that idea, he didn't need to see anyone, except maybe Tom and Duncan. Pushing open the stained glass doors he was greeted by Dr. Evans, a rather young woman with hair as dark his that he had seen a few times in main hub, speaking to soldiers with small injuries. As he was currently the only 'patient' he didn't even have to wait.

"So, Mr. Temple, what can I do for you?" she asked him from behind her desk, already scrabbling down his name on a chart.

"You are the only one that calls me that aside from Lester." was his initial remark before noticing he hadn't answered her question.

"Well then, Connor, what can I do for you?" she repeated, a smirk tugging at her lips.

He began to fidget with the wristbands of his trademark fingerless gloves and looked back at the door to make sure nobody was eavesdropping on them. The last thing he needed was everybody knowing he was being a liability once again. "I… Since we came back from our trip to Peru I haven't been sleeping very well."

She seemingly examined him as her view went up and down his boy and she said: "I already thought so…" she said absently before her vision locked back on his face. "But the medical files…" She paused while typing something on her computer.

"They don't tell me anything, since the reports of that operation are above my security clearance. I guess you will have to help me fill in the blanks here. Do you feel any physical pain that keeps you from sleeping?"

He slowly shook his head, having to put some strands of his long hair back behind his ear. "No. Look, I- I have seen – or heard, whatever you want – some pretty bad things. I would rather not tell you about them, but every time I close my eyes the memories come back, or when I am in total silence, I can still hear those screams."

The doctor raised a brow at him, making him realize how in a movie cliché way 'I can still hear them scream' spelled slowly going mad. In that moment he also became aware of the fact that if his mental health was not a hundred percent obvious anymore he could be suspended from his work. The panic arose in him that maybe coming here wasn't such a bright idea after all. "I just wanted to get some medication from you, so I can have a good night of sleep, that's it."

"Hear whose screams?" She asked, apparently having ignored his last words. She stood up and moved around her desk to stand directly in front of him.

Connor covered his face with his and rubbed his tired eyes before he made a wild gesture. "The creatures from the anomaly. They got to a village in the mountains before we could…" His voice quivered while speaking and tears began to form in his eyes. "We didn't get there in time. From a distance we only could hear the people screaming" he choked up on the last two words.

Doctor Evan's face grew in to an expression of concern. "Look, I'll prescribe you the medications you need to sleep peacefully."

He breathed a sigh in relief. "Under one condition, though. Over the next few weeks, you'll come here and we'll talk-"

"No!" he burst out. "I don't need a psychiatrist! I said I don't want to talk. I'm not crazy!"

She stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder. "I know, Connor. You need rest now, that's why I'll give you the medication. I know I can't force you to come and talk to me, but it is an offer. Completely unofficial, no reports. Nobody will ask you to stop working here."

Again he asked himself if everyone could read him like book, but he didn't have it in him anymore to argue with the woman in front of him. "I'll think about it."

It was a weak and inconsequent answer, but Dr. Evans nodded as if she accepted that.

"Alright." She flashed him a smile and moved towards the back wall of her office, where the shelves were filled with hundreds of small packages in various sizes and colors. Her hand hovered back and forth between two medicals for a few second before she had made her choice, turned around and gave him the small container.

"Thank you." said Connor as he took it with slightly shaky hands.

He turned around, pulled the door open and left the room with a huge sigh of relief. It didn't go well, but it wasn't that awful either so he felt grateful for that. Now he only had to get out of the building without anyone asking him any questions. For once these past few days the luck seemed to be on his side as he actually could just leave without exchanging a single other word as all of the others were submerged in their own work.

The only one who noticed was Sir James Lester, who gave himself a small nod, knowing he had done the right thing.

The next chapter might take me while to write, but I really hope that it won't be two years :D