I'll tell you one thing about James Tiberius Kirk
He's a cuntivore.
It only took a few short days after first meeting him before I had the pleasure of seeing that beautiful dirty blonde head of his between my legs. For a non-xenolinguistics major, he sure has a talented tongue.
I have had many men in my time (and some aliens as well). What can I say? I'm an Orion, its what we do. But none of them thus far have showed the kind of expertise, the kind of attention, the kind of fascination with my nether regions as Jim Kirk.
It's a nice change.
Most men don't come to Orion women to please the woman herself. Orion's skin is covered in the most sensitive of nerve endings, so basically you could get us off with a handshake (and trust me some have, that was the last firm handshake Captain Pike ever gave me). Most men see the Orion woman as an instrument of his pleasure. We in turn like to give pleasure, so we don't mind in the slightest when they avail themselves of our myriad of genetic gifts. Namely the lack of gag reflex and a vaginal cavity as tight as a …well you get the picture.
Sorry to be so graphic, its just simple astrobiology.
But, Jim, Jim was different.
As soon we'd conquered the issue of clothing removal, and locked the door to keep his roommate out (a grumpy southern guy from what he told me, Note to self, must open up dialogue for threesome possibilities, I do love some southern comfort) I pulled him onto the bed with me. He was a good kisser, which should have been the first sign.
Then he took those amazing lips away from mine and started to kiss a trail down my neck. "This is it," I thought, positioning my hips underneath him. But he didn't do what I expected him to do, he just kept kissing. He kissed down my collarbone to my breasts, nipping slightly at the tender skin. He took a split second to study the nipples (they're purple so its understandable) before sucking it into his mouth. I could feel his tongue swirl gently around each tip, further proof that I should have known I was in bed with a cunnilingus genius. Then he kissed down my stomach to my hips, each kiss exploding like a firework against my sensitive skin.
"Wha, what are you doing?" I asked in a strangled voice as he licked my inner thighs.
He smirked up at me, God those blue eyes," Just wait" he breathed in reply. Then his mouth moved against me and I almost came out of sheer surprise. Those lips and tongue that had so impressed me above the waist were now working wonders below with every calculated flick and swirl. I swear to Gods I saw stars. My senses were flooded. The scratch of his hairs against my thighs, his warm hands on my pelvic bones, and the hot of his mouth against me. I started to feel the familiar shaking in the pit of my stomach as my orgasm bubbled up into my chest and finally into my head. I exploded into the trance that always follows an Orion orgasm, an almost out of body experience. The familiar moment of total peace and clarity that happens every time we reach climax. This is the secret to our cheery dispositions, we achieve enlightenment every time sex, it's a shame humans can't figure out how to do the same.
No wonder they're so grumpy all the time.
I call his name as I come, panting and twisting my fingers into his hair. He smiles triumphantly as he crawls back up on top of me. I don't even care about the hygienic implications; I'm so greedy to kiss him. I pull those magical lips back to mine, which are still trembling slightly. This is the beginning of something wonderful, I think as I kiss him.
What the fuck do they teach those boys in Iowa?!