My First fic in English. Please be patient! =)
I own nothing!
Shattered
Summary: Post 3x14. Elena deals with the guilt and with unexplored feelings, while Damon finds a way to release his frustration. But what if Elena catches him in the act? Rated M for a reason.
6 AM. I couldn't sleep at night. Not at all. I remembered that day when I woke up at 6 AM and he was here. Lying on my bed like he belonged here. He is not here now and probably He won't be here anymore, and it's all my fault.
I shouldn't have said that. In fact, I regretted immediately after the words comes out of my mouth. But I didn't get the chance to apologize. And I knew it, I saw it in his eyes that I had broken his heart, and it was killing me.
Was killing me because he was the one that was there for me all this time, the one the cared about me, the one that protected me... the one that loved me.
I got out of bed slowly, I wouldn't let one thing that I said without even thinking straight mess up with our relationship. I didn't mean that to sound the way it did. And he should know that.
I changed my clothes, grabbed the keys of my car and drove to the boarding house. It was early in the morning, but I didn't care. I needed to fix this misunderstanding or I will might just go insane.
I opened the door and entered the house. Everything was silent and I was glad. Praying not to meet Stefan on my way to Damon's room I started to climbing the stairs.
When I was in front of Damon's door I thought if I should or not knock. Thinking that I didn't want to make any noise to not end up waking Stefan, I decided to enter without knocking.
I pushed the door slowly and entered. I saw he was in bed, sleeping, so I walked up to bed. When I got close enough I gasped. There was another person in the bed! My eyes opened and I placed my hand over my mouth to stop any sound from coming out when I realized who was in bed next to Damon. Blonde hair, lying naked in his bed and sharing a sheet with him. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. How could he sleep with Rebekah?
I felt like something was breaking inside of me and my eyes suddenly were wet. I backed off one step but I couldn't avoid a sob. It was enough for waking him up. He lifted his head and I saw the way his blue eyes opened when he saw me. I turned and started to run to reach the door, just to see him right in front of me . On boxers.
"What the hell are you doing here Elena?" He asked me, shocked.
"I'm asking myself the same thing" I answered trying my best to no cry in front of him, but then I felt a tear running down through my face and I knew I had failed miserably.
"Well what's going on here?" I heard Rebekah asking behind me. Hear her voice made my angry explode.
"She tried to kill me! How could you?" I asked almost screaming. Probably I was being pathetic, screaming and crying over him, but right now it didn't matter. I was feeling so hurt. I was barely thinking straight.
I don't know if was my voice or my tears, but he looked at me like he was feeling sorry for that. He frowned and opened his mouth two times before finally speak.
"Elena this is..." He started
"I didn't know she was your girlfriend now.. Should I worry about being stabbed in the back again?" Rebekah said and I heard when she got out of the bed and probably started to get dressed.
"Get out Rebekah" He said still looking at me
"Don't need to ask twice! Is pretty difficult being in the same room as her when I can't kill her" She said and I saw when she passed for me stopping beside Damon.
"It was really fun. You're good!" She whispered loud enough so I could hear. I felt my blood heating and tried not to think about them making out in his bed. And then she was gone.
"How could you Damon? It's Rebekah!" I asked again. It sounded jealous. I was so fucking jealous and disappointed. And I wouldn't deny that.
"How could I? Do you really want to know? The details?" He asked me sounding angry. I guess that now that my tears were gone he forgot the guilty, if was it that I saw in his eyes just before.
"I can't believe that..." I said shocked
"What are you doing here Elena?" He asked suddenly like he was tired.
"Forget. It doesn't matter anymore"
"Ok. So if you're done.. " He said showing me the door.
"You're a dick! I thought you had changed, but of course I was wrong. You just jumped in bed with the person that tried to kill me one day before and you didn't give a crap about it!" I said almost screaming but immediately I knew I had said too much again. Suddenly, that I did not even see it coming, I felt my back hit the wall of his bedroom.
"What the hell do you want for me Elena? You said to me that I care too much and that THAT was a problem! And now you´re saying that I don't give a crap? Stop being hypocrite! I'm just solving a Problem for you! If feel is a problem, Ok. I don't feel anymore. And that's it!" He said pushing me through the wall, being so close that I wasn't seeing him clearly. He was angry, and I knew he was right, but right know I was so shocked that I couldn't react.
"And now what? You're upset because I will stop to lick the floor where you walk? You wanted me stand for you like a dog? Is that?" He continued and I felt tears starting to run down my face again. So I was sure that my tears does something in him because he backed off.
"Damon I didn't mean that to sound like..." I started feeling that I was shaking.
"Stop... That was exactly what you meant" He interrupted me. "And this Elena, what you just saw, it's the best I can do. Jumping in the bed with Rebekah, or anyone else... I don't care! It's the best I can do, because what I really want is get the hell out of here and break some necks. But I can't! I can't just fucking leave! I have to stay and watch "It will always be Stefan" right in front of me and feel pathetic and stupid , for had thought, for one second, that it could be different." He said looking at me and I could see how broke he was. And I felt my heart broke too. What did I do?
"So if you care, Just a little bit, about me... get out and leave me the hell alone" He Said and looked away from me. I was definitely shaking. God it hurts! What I did to him was hurting like hell! And he just said he want to leave? No! And see him like that, so hurt, was making my body melt in pain. I always pushed him to be a better man, to feel, to be good, and then I just said that his love was a problem? What the heel was wrong with me? I knew I didn't mean like that, I was saying about the fact the he wouldn't let me do anything because he was acting like a super protector, but that was not the way it sounded and I admit it. And then it clicked me, I was in love with him! I could barely breathe just with the thought of him leaving. I could barely breathe knowing that was my fault he was so broken.
"Damon.. just.." I started, my voice was trembling. I needed to explain to him, to say how sorry I was about that, to say how much I care about him, how much I love him.
"Just get out Elena" He said in a breathe and went to put his pants, turning his back on me.
"No! Please, just listen to me!" I said walking till him and holding his arm to make he look at me.
"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean it like that! Of course your love is not a problem Damon…" I said when he looked at me and before he says something to stop me I continued.
"I was talking about the way you're acting with me.. Not letting me make my own decisions…Your love means a lot to me! You were with me all this time, supporting me, protecting me, loving me… please don't push me away! I need you like I never thought I will someday need someone, and this is scarring the hell out of me!" I said trying to express everything I was feeling.
"Now you're being selfish" He said serious, but I could see the way his expression softened.
"Maybe. But I can´t live without you Damon! I don't know when it happened, when I turned to be so dependent on you. But I do! I don't know when it started, maybe since the first day I saw you… but… I know now… I love you." I said. My heart was beating so fast that I thought it would come out of my mouth. I have never felt so nervous. I just admitted what I had been trying to deny all this time and it really felt good. I felt free. I finally said I loved him and it couldn't felt more right. And just after I say it out loud I was pretty sure of that, like I was sure the sun rises every day.
"Elena, you don't need to do that. I'm not leaving Ok.. I already said that.." He started to say. He was raising an eyebrow to me and I was sure he was thinking I was insane and desperate. He didn't believe me. I'd have to show him.
"Stop… I'm not saying it for you to stay and don't push me away! I meant it Damon! I feel it! And I'm not denying it anymore!" I said and kissed him.
I crashed my lips against his and I felt his body tense against mine. He was shocked. I was too. But that's the way things works between me and Damon. Fewer words and more actions by instinct. He didn´t react, he was frozen and I stepped back still holding his face between my hands.
"I love you. I meant it! I'm so sorry that I hurt you! Please Damon, don´t push me away!" I said looking in his eyes. He frowned and looked at me in a way that I knew it had hit him. Then I felt his hands on my waist pulling me against him and I closed my eyes in the same moment that his lips were on mine. That should've been our first kiss. He was not forcing himself on me, he was not dying and I wasn't too shocked to properly kiss him back.
I parted my lips giving him permission and in the moment his tongue found mine I knew that was no coming back. I put my hands in his hair pulling him closer, our tongues fighting for dominance. It was so perfect! I could kiss him like that forever. He broke the kiss holding my face between his hands, our foreheads touching.
"Say it again" He whispered against my mouth.
"I Love you Damon Salvatore" I whispered back. He pulled apart just enough to look me in the eyes.
"I love you too. So much" He said and I felt my body shiver. His eyes was burning into mine so ardently, his blues eyes so full of love, passion and lust that I thought I would melt right there in front of him. And then I felt his lips on mine again. Roughly this time, and I kissed him back the same way.
It was getting hard to breathe, so he let go of my mouth and started to kiss my face, going down to my neck and I pulled him closer feeling my knees going weak. When he started to step forward to the bed I stopped him.
"Wait" I said, still breathless. He stopped immediately and looked at me.
"Did you do it in the bathtub?" I asked
"What?" He said frowning at me.
"You and Rebekah.. Did you use the bathtub?" I asked again. He looked at me confused and I explained.
"I'm not using this bed Damon" I said feeling a little stupid.
"Ow.. Elena… it meant nothing! Nothing!" He said understanding what I meant.
"I know! But what we are doing means the world for me and I'm not doing it in the same sheets she was under 30 minutes ago." I said. He seemed to be surprised and amused.
"No. the bathtub was not used" He just said.
"Great." I said and kissed him again trying to move to the bathroom. He put his hands on my waist and in a half second we were at the bathroom. I looked at him to see him looking at me seeming so nervous how I was.
"Are you sure?" He asked me
"Never been more" I answered holding his face while I brushed my lips against his. He groaned and crashed his lips on mine. Then I forgot everything. I forgot how incredible messed up my life was, I forgot the whole world, everybody. Now, it was just me and Damon. I just felt, and I never felt more desired, more loved and more… happy.
He started to kiss my neck again and I surprised myself for think how good it would be if he bit me. I'd never thought of that before with Stefan, but now, with Damon it was one way to be completely his, and I wanted to feel like that, entirely his. In all ways possible.
"Bite me" I said in a breathy voice. He lifted his head to look me in the eyes and I saw the confusion written all over his face.
"Elena… I don´t think…" He whispered.
"I want it Damon, I need to feel you. All of you" I interrupted him, whispering back and immediately I saw the lust and hungry in his eyes. I felt my body shiver.
He kissed me again roughly and I felt his hands slid under my shirt caressing my skin. I moaned when his hands reached the side of my breasts. He broke the kiss and in a blink my shirt was in the floor. He looked down at my boobs covered by my black lacy bra and I felt my heart quicken. Then he hooked his fingers in the front of my jeans and slowly unzipped it. Getting down on his knees he slid then down my legs. I shivered again with the feeling of his fingers in my skin. When he was done he started to give open mouthed kisses in all the extension of my legs and I had to lean and put my hands on his shoulders because I knew my knees wouldn't stand me much more. When he slowly reached up in my thigh I felt like I couldn't take it anymore.
"Damon.." I begged.
"What?" He asked, his voice was rough. I suppressed a moan with the feeling of his unnecessarily breathe against my panties.
"You know what" I whispered begging him. He smirked and suddenly rubbed his tongue over my panties. I groaned and gripped hard on his shoulders.
"No. I don't" He whispered back. I looked down at him and when our eyes locked I saw my lust reflected in his.
"Don´t tease me. Please!" I begged again. I felt like I was in the edge. I'd never wanted someone like now. My whole body was on fire and my panties were soaked. I needed to feel him like I needed the air to breath. Me pleading like that seemed to have an effect on him because on vampire speed he took off his pants and then I found myself partially lying on the bathtub that was empty of water.
I swallowed hard when I saw him lifting my knees positioning himself between my legs. He put his hands on my tights, caressing it and when I was about to plead again he ripped off my panties in one only movement.
I gasped a little surprised but definitely loving it. He looked at me before lean down to my core. And then I felt his amazing tongue licking my clit. And then I screamed.
"Oh my God Damon…" I moaned while I tangled my fingers in his hair because I needed to grab something. He continued his magical and when I thought it couldn't be more perfect he slid one finger inside me.
"God Elena, You taste so good, you're so wet… It's driving me crazy" He said as he lifted his head to look at me. I was lost in my own pleasure, and when he started to move his fingers inside of me I knew I was very close.
"Oh please don´t stop" I said, my voice sounding very rough. I bit my lip when I started to feel the first waves of pleasure through my entire body. I arched my back and tried to say that I was very close, but the moan that escaped of my mouth was everything, but not a word.
He began to lick the inner of one of my tights, next to my core, while slid another finger inside me. I almost screamed of pleasure. I was so close! Suddenly I felt he lift his head and when I looked down at him I saw that his face was transformed and I could see his fangs. He was beautiful and even with the dark veins around his eyes I could see that they were pure lust and passion and I felt proud for have done that to him. I put my hands on each side of his face caressing the area down his eyes with my thumbs.
"You're so beautiful" I said totally breathless. He kissed one of my hands and fastened his movements inside of me. I groaned. He went back to my tights and one second before it happened I knew what he would do.
When I felt his fangs biting down on my tight and he first suck on my skin I thought I could explode. Of pleasure. In spite of haven´t wish being bitten during sex before, I knew it was kind of common, talking about vampires. But I'd never even imagine that it would feel like that. I felt like my body had turned in a jelly, In fact I was so high in my orgasm that I couldn't feel my legs, my arms… In some place deep of mind I heard screams of passion. My screams. When I finally found myself able to move, I looked down at Damon and took a sigh of him licking my skin, removing all the blood the flood out of the wounds in my sink and of his mouth. My body was shaking when he looked back at me, now licking his lips.
"You're taste in incomparable. It's perfection. In all ways" He whispered while licked his fingers that was inside of me. He was so sexy! I barely had came down of the most pleasurable moment of my life and just that sigh of him made a new wave of desire flood through my body.
"It was… Oh my God, I can't describe it.." I said trying to let him know how amazing it felt for me. He smirked leaning to me.
"It's not over yet baby" He said and in a second he was sitting in the bathtub and pulling me into his lap. I missed when he took off his pants and boxers but I was sure he wasn't wearing it anymore. I looked at him and he held my face.
"I've been waiting so much for this moment… I love you Elena, and I always will, no matter what… Never forget that" He whispered and I could see all the emotion in his eyes. And then I kissed him, I could feel my taste on his lips and it made me moan against his mouth.
He started to place kisses on my jaw and in my neck, while, with one of his hands, he reached the faucet and opened it making the water slowly flow, beginning to fill the bathtub. I shivered when he reached my collarbone and I felt his other hand slide at my back. I heard a rip and then I was topless.
"What's the problem with my underwear?" I asked breathless realizing the he ripped off my panties and now my bra. I felt him smirking against my skin, but I never heard an answer. In fact, I totally forgot what I just had said when he cupped my breasts. I leaned my head back giving him space. He took his time caressing me with his hands and I knew he was teasing me.
"Damon…" I moaned
"What?" He asked and suddenly I felt his tongue licking around my nipple. I groaned.
"Oh.. God" I whispered and tangled my fingers in his hair keeping him there. And then he totally took one into his mouth. I moaned roughly and started to move my hips in his lap wanting all the contact I could get. And this time I heard him moaning. I could perfectly feel his erection on my core and it was driving me crazy. He moved to my other nipple while put his hands on my waist keeping the mocking thrusts.
"I can't take it anymore Damon… I need you now" I whispered while I ran my hands through his back feeling his muscles tensing with my touch. He lifted his head to look at me and I took advantage of that to run my hands now through his chest. I leaned to kiss him in the mouth and started to make a trail of kisses down his neck and shoulders. He pulled my hips against his body and tangled his fingers in my hair while I was running my hands increasingly down in his belly. Suddenly I caught his erection with one of my hands and heard when he groaned hard against my neck.
"Humm…" He moaned when I moved my hand up and down on him. After some more movements like that, I guided him to my entrance. One of his hands came to my chin lifting my head and locking our eyes. With the other hand he helped me when I began to going down on his extension in one slowly and delicious movement. We moaned together, our eyes still locked.
"God you feel so good… so tight.. so wet" He said roughly pulling me to him and kissing my neck. He filled me so completely… I have never felt that way, I never thought it was possible to feel that way. I wanted to say something, anything to express how perfect that was being to me, but with the lack of words and concentration I said the only thing that could completely express my feelings.
"I love you" And then I started moving. He pulled back just enough to look briefly at me before kiss me with all the passion we both were feeling. He put both hands on my waist helping me to keep the pace of the thrusts. I passed my arms around his back, pulling him closer and enjoying the amazing sensation of our chests touching and moving together as we kissed and moaned against each other mouth.
After a while he started moving his hips against mine, increasing the speed of our movements, and I felt increasingly closer to my orgasm. He seemed to feel that because pulled back one more time to look me in the eyes.
"Look at me" He said roughly, as if I could stop looking at those blue eyes. Suddenly I felt one of his hands going down to my core stimulating my clit. I bit hard on my lip. I was so fucking close.
"Don't fight baby, let it go" He whispered as if he was reading my mind. I didn't want it to end; I wanted it to last forever. But I couldn't take anymore. So I held his face between my hands and screamed when I came hard. He didn't stopped looking at me even for one second, and I did the same. When I contracted around him he groaned loudly and with one more thrust he came too.
And we stand there, breathless, our foreheads touching, unable to move. He held my face between his hands caressing my skin.
"I'm not letting you go… never more… You know that, don't you?" He whispered as he looked at me intensely.
"There´s no other place in the world I want to be. I'm yours Damon" I whispered back. And he kissed me again. Yeah, I was his… and he was mine… forever.