As Black as Black Can Be

Summary: A simple one shot. A conversation between Sirius and Regulus right before Sirius' moved out of the house and Regulus becomes a Death Eater.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"So you're really leaving then?"

Sirius Black sighed and blew his dark bangs out of his face as he turned to face his constantly nagging and question asking, younger brother, Regulus. He slammed his suit case shut and gave a cold glare with his gray eyes. His handsome, good looking face wearing a frown and a sour lining.

"That is why I'm packing…" Sirius muttered.

Regulus, was almost a smaller version of Sirius. A handsome young man with dark hair cut short, rather than a bit shaggy like his brother and he had neat bangs just reaching his eyes. His eyes were a crisp brown like his father's keeping the two from looking like duplicates. But, if you knew either of the boys, they swore they looked nothing a like. Sirius always saying Regulus had bigger ears than him.

"But why?" Regulus asked.

"Why am I packing or why am I leaving?" Sirius said looking at a shirt and sniffing it to see if it was clean and wearable.

"Both I suppose."

Sirius laughed his bark like laugh while Regulus awaited an answer.

"Because I can't stand this place." That was Sirius' grim reply.

"That can't be the only reason."

"Oh yea. Mum and Dad are a bunch of blighters too."

Regulus looked on with heavy eyes. Sirius took notice as he went through his drawers pulling out socks and looking at them with questionable expressions. "Why the long face? With me gone, you can get all the rightful attention you deserve." He replied coldly.

"You make it sound as if I enjoy it."

Sirius laughed, "Well, you can't say you don't."

"Well," Regulus said sitting down on the edge of Sirius' bed, hands folded as if he had been instructed to keep his manners, even in his brother's room, "I don't."

"You mean you don't like mother always giving her wittle Regulus all the huggy wuggies in the world," Sirius imitated his mother's voice in a horrible rendition.

Regulus smiled and chuckled and seeming satisfied in making one more person laugh, Sirius smiled himself at his younger brother before returning to pack.

But even out of the corner of his eye, Sirius saw his brother go back to his solemn expression of depression.

Sirius grinned. "I'm only joking. Though I suppose that would be torture receiving 'huggy wuggies', but then again how would I know? The last time I got any phrase from her was when I was five."

Again, his face turned sour and Regulus looked on sadly. There was no point in going further with this topic.

"Well… whom are you staying with?" he asked softly.

Sirius kicked a schoolbook across the room into his closet and Regulus assumed that Sirius would not be taking that particular book with him.

"The Potter's."

Regulus knew the answer before it was even spoken.

"Why?" Sirius asked.

"Why what?"

"Why'd you ask?"

Regulus looked at the floor and shrugged. Despite what it may have looked like on the outside, Regulus did in fact enjoy his brother. Though the past few years they hardly spoke. This was one of the first conversations they had had that hadn't resulted in them arguing. But it would. Regulus knew it. Once he found out about it.

"I guess I was just wondering was all."

"Never hurts to wonder," Sirius answered looking at his bookshelf. "You want any of these?" he asked. "Half of these books are nonsense."

"Why would I want to read nonsense?"

"I dunno. Just wondering." Sirius replied with a smirk making Regulus smile slightly.

"Hey. What's that?" Regulus asked pointing his finger as something underneath a shirt and tie on Sirius' floor.

"Only one way to find out."

With one kick of his leg, Sirius' kicked the shirt off the object on the floor. Bending down he brushed off what appeared to be a photo album. Regulus leaned forward with interest.

"What is it?"

Sirius opened it up. "A photo album. And judging on how short I am in this picture, I'm guessing an old one."

Regulus made to get up as Sirius started walking over to him. He sat himself down next to his brother and opened the album so Regulus and him could both look into it.

Sirius snorted a laugh. "You look like a girl in that picture."

"I do not." Regulus looked closer. It was him and for some odd reason he was wearing what appeared to be one of Narcissa's dresses. Carefully observing he saw Sirius laughing in the background. He looked about seven or eight, meaning Regulus could have only been about five or six.

"Well, maybe I do. If I do recall, you put me in that dress offering me a galleon."

Grinning slyly, Sirius answered with pride. "You we're so gullible."

"You never paid me either."

"You expected me to?" Sirius laughed.

Turning the next page there was another picture; only this time it was something Regulus could gloat about. Sirius and Bellatrix playing dress up. But neither of them was doing it willingly. They were rolling around in the picture throwing the make up at one another.

"You look good in lipstick." Regulus joked.

Sirius turned a slight red and turned the page, "Moving on!"

"You look better in it then Bellatrix does if that makes you feel better."

"Gee thanks Regulus. I feel so much better being compared to a cow in lipstick."

Fumbling with the page, Sirius seemed to be scanning over different pictures, each on holding their own memory. It was then Sirius felt a small nag in the back of his mind as he saw these pictures.

They were pictures of him and his brother.

Actually getting along. No arguments. No shouting. No throwing forks and spoons and god knows what else at each other during dinner. They were getting along. They were smiling.

When Sirius was seven, he was Regulus' role model.

When he was eight, he was Regulus' best friend.

When he was nine, he was the best big brother in the world anyone could have.

When he was ten, Regulus could ask for no one better.

But when he was eleven, he wasn't good enough. And the picture's clearly showed that. The lack of brotherly admiration diminished from the pictures as more unhappy ones took their place.

"How come you hated me so much?" Sirius blurted out. "We apparently used to get along a lot judging by the pictures."

"I never hated you."

"Yea, then… but I'm not good enough now."

"I never said that."

"Not everything has to be spoken in order for someone else to understand it." Sirius gave him a haunting glance. Regulus wanted to shudder but kept himself from doing so. Sirius, clearly showed his emotions on his face, and often, it was a scary thing.

"And you never denied it either." Sirius also added.

"I just did right now."

"That's a different type of denying." Sirius said closing the photo album and placing it on the floor.

"It's different? How? You're mental sometimes, I swear."

Sirius turned to Regulus, "Me mental? Ha! Well if I am it's your fault."

"Why mine!"

"When I was nine and you were seven you threw that chair at my head leaving long lasting effects damaging my brain," said Sirius rather matter-of-factly.

Regulus rolled his eyes. "Come off it. You're not still going on about that are you? It was an accident!"

"My beautiful face has never recovered."

"You're over dramatic."

"At least I'm not a chair thrower."

"See! You just can't let that go can you?"

Sirius paused and pretended to think. "Nope."

There was a long pause before Regulus stated.

"You deserved to get hit with that chair."

"I did not!"

"Yes you did," Regulus argued.

Sirius snorted, "See? See! We always fight now! What did I ever do to you or anyone else in are god forsaken family to make all of you hate me!" He grabbed Regulus by the shoulders and was shaking him, "What did I do!"

"I... I never said I hated you…" Regulus stuttered out hurt by his brother's outburst. "You didn't do anything…"

"You're just saying that."

Sirius let go of his brother and returned to his packing.

"No. No I'm not."

Sirius looked as his brother.

"I mean it. I never hated you. I—"

"You were just too afraid to show it because you thought Mum would curse you to oblivion if you were happy for me being in Gryffindor?" Sirius said gently picking his suitcase up and placing it by the door of his bedroom.

"Well…"

"Yes." Sirius said shortly, "You were too afraid of Mum. I understand."

Regulus shot a glare, "No. No you don't understand. You think you do but you don't. Since Mum thinks you're a failure she watches me constantly. I couldn't do anything with out hearing 'Make sure you do it this way. Your brother did it that way. You do it this way.' I hated it."

"Well I'm sorry for that but don't point me out as the bad guy. I admit it, it's wrong of Mum to do that, but just because I chose to be different doesn't mean she should take it out on you." Sirius paused looking into his brother's eyes, "But, that doesn't mean I was wrong for being different. Don't let people tell you how to live your life Regulus. You could end up in real trouble one day. Follow your own choices and be what you want to be. You know you best, so do what you know is good for you. Don't let anyone hold you back because of my choices or Mum's or Dad's. It's all yours, no one else's."

Sirius finished looking at his brother. He meant that. He had meant every word he had just said to his younger brother, and Regulus, quite frankly, was a bit touched. He smiled slightly at the older boy in front of him. That was his brother. The brother who had always done everything in his power to help him. That was how it used to be before his becoming Gryffindor and his parents started to tell him Sirius was different… a freak. But what Sirius had just said. It was great advice. And Regulus took in his words. He shouldn't have let his mother influence him like that. Sirius never did, and he seemed almost happier.

With a smile tugging at his face, Regulus grinned. He basked in the light for a shinning moment a burning sensation filled his left arm. The pain surged through him so badly he didn't even realized a small gasp had escaped his lips and he was holding his arm.

Sirius took notice.

"You alright?"

Startled Regulus answered quickly. "Yes. Fine."

"No you're not. What's wrong?" Sirius asked.

How did that boy know he was lying?

"No, really I'm fine."

Regulus mentally cursed himself and hoped to God Sirius didn't see the mark. The Dark Mark. Their whole conversation, everything they had talked about. They had just become friends again and because he had to be like his family and believe in their beliefs, he had just made the biggest mistake in his life. He had become a Death Eater in supporting his parents' ideas to show them he wasn't like Sirius and he could be the good son. But in doing so, he had just placed a terrible curse upon himself. Oh God! He couldn't let Sirius see.

"I'm fine… just a… bite. Pixie got me in the attic. It stings a bit."

"Are you sure. Pixie bites normally only sting for 5 hours."

"I was in the attic only a few minutes before seeing you." he lied.

But Sirius wasn't a fool. He knew right away what was on Regulus' arm with out even looking. Regulus watched his brother's gray eyes grow cold and his teeth grinding together in anger.

"Out."

"What?"

"Get out. You heard me."

"But… but why?" Regulus asked. Perhaps playing dumb could work.

Sirius wrenched opened his door almost breaking the handle off. Playing dumb did not work. "You know god damn why. Out!"

"Sirius I… I…"

"Save it. Get out! I knew you followed Mum's orders so you wouldn't even up like me or get in trouble, but joining them? You're nuts. Get out of my sight."

"You don't understand…"

"Even if I did I'd still be disgusted with you! Get out of my room! GET OUT!"

And Sirius grabbed his brother right where his mark was. Regulus shouted in pain as he was shoved through Sirius' bedroom door. He turned around and shoved himself back into the door before Sirius could close. He had to talk to his brother. He didn't want to be a Death Eater anymore. He never wanted to be one in the first place. He did it for…

Why did he do it? So his parents would think high of him? Because a few of his friends did? Because he never thought for himself and only did what others asked?

"SIRIUS! Don't lock me out! I want to talk!"

"I don't talk with traitors!"

Regulus was stunned. "I'm the traitor? I'm the traitor? What about you? What about what we just said? I never called you a traitor and never hated you for what you—"

"For what I did! I couldn't help that the hat put me in Gryffindor you traitor!"

"And now you're calling me one! I never called you a traitor or hated you for being different and hating our family. I might have been told otherwise but—"

"Me calling Mum a slag and being in Gryffindor is completely different from you being a Death Eater!" Sirius retorted.

In a way he was right. But, in a way he was wrong. But he couldn't say that to Sirius. He'd never listen. But it was worth a shot.

"How is it different? We both went against family!" Regulus argued.

"Both of us! Ha! Only me! You being with the Death Eaters and killing all muggleborns is something I'm sure Mum will be thrilled about!" Sirius shouted.

Regulus continued to push the door to get it but it was proving difficult. Sirius was pushing the opposite direction and was greatly stronger than Regulus. It was taking every bit of strength he had to keep the door closing.

"Sirius I—"

"I already told you I don't want to hear it! You know, in my mind I thought we were really friends again. Brothers again. But you throw it all away by lying to me and joining them!"

Regulus had to keep the door open. "I never lied about it!"

"But you still didn't tell me and you were feeling guilty through out the whole conversation! I could tell!" Sirius pushed harder, "There for you lied!"

"SIRIUS!"

"NO!"

And then came the footsteps. A rough, ragged set of footsteps and a angry sigh. A woman stormed her way up the stairs, black long hair in a bun, perfectly clean black robes and a cold set of gray eyes. Her beautiful face narrowed at the sight before her and a house-elf hid behind her radiant robes.

"BOYS!"

Regulus immediately stopped shoving. He heard Sirius slam his door shut. Standing up tall and a bit frightened, Regulus turned to his mother.

"Y-yes?" he asked.

"SIRIUS BLACK! OUT HERE NOW!" roared his mother, her lips thin and face drawn to an angry state. Regulus hoped Sirius would open the door. His mother would rip it down it he didn't.

After a few moments the door opened slowly and the handsome young man peered from behind the door. He held the same sullen gray eyes and walked out. The floorboards squeaked at the house-elf started to talk.

It was a rather clean house-elf, but it's face still held an ugly resemblance to his relatives, which hung on the wall as a Black tradition.

"Young master should be more kind to Mistress."

Sirius rolled his eyes as he propped himself up in a slant against the wall. "Stuff it Kreacher."

"Sirius! Young man I'm warning you! You're on thin ice." Threatened his mother pointing her finger at him angrily.

"Shove it up your—"

"SIRIUS!" another voice boomed up from the hall. But this was a man's voice. A tall, handsome man in his late thirties appeared. His dark brown eyes resembled Regulus' and his face structure was that of both his sons. His dark robes flowed behind him as he began to walk over towards his eldest son. Raising a hand he grabbed Sirius' arm and pulled him over towards him.

"Show some respect towards your mother! I have enough of your attitude." Said his father in an angry whisper. "Either you sharpen up or you're out of this house!"

"Good. I want out!" Sirius roared back. He jerked his arm out of his father's hand. "And hands off."

"Don't talk to me like that."

"I'll talk to you how I want to." Sirius turned to head down the stairs.

Regulus could almost feel the burning sensation in his cheek. He watched his mother rip her hand back and splatter it into his face. He saw his brother loose balance for a moment then his surprised glance as he looked back up at his mother. She had always been angry with Sirius before, but she had never slapped him before.

"Katrina!" roared his father. Clearly he wasn't happy about that.

But his mother glared at her oldest son, "GET OUT! GET OUT RIGHT NOW! YOU… YOU… YOU SHAME OF MY FLESH! EMBRASSMENT TO THE FAMILY! GET OUT! OUT! OUT!"

And for the first time in his life Sirius had nothing to say as he looked back at his mother. He wanted to leave so badly, but then suddenly being granted what you wanted seemed unreal, almost unwanted.

"WELL!" roared his mother, "GET OUT!"

Sirius walked back to his room silently and shut the door quietly. Regulus wanted to see if he was all right but didn't dare enter his room because he was the good boy. The apple in his parents' eyes.

"That ungrateful brat." Murmured his mother, "I hope he stays out there."

Mr. Black said nothing as they descended the stairs about his wife's comment. It wasn't till he reached the bottom when he called out to his youngest son. "Regulus, come and get down here. It's time for dinner."

Was that all they could thin about? Leaning his ear to his brother's door he though he heard a small sob, or perhaps a angry sigh escape the rooms walls and someone else talking to him.

"You can always stay with me Padfoot." Said the voice. It sounded like James Potter's to Regulus.

"Thanks Prongs. You're like my brother or something the way you help me out..."

Regulus felt his mouth curve into a frown and backed away from the door with sorrow present among him.

"So… you thought that you weren't good enough for me?" Regulus rolled up his sleeves letting his Dark Mark show, "Looks like it's the other way around Sirius. I'm not good enough for you."

And with that, the young Death Eater ran downstairs in a furry as the Animagus on the floor above his escaped out the window with high hopes of staying at his best friend's house.

But neither of them could help but wonder what was about to happen to their brother.

Author's Note: So what did you think? Reviews make me happy.