When Galinda declares herself the best matchmaker on campus, she is provided with the ultimate test. It's stupid. It's ridiculous. Avaric and Elphaba are completely incompatible... right? Shiz-era, bits of bookverse but mostly musicalverse, AU.

So lately, I've been reading the multitude of fanfictions from the popular Fiyeraba writers, vinkunwildflowerqueen and Ultimate Queen of Cliffies. An overriding theme in pretty much all their stories was Elphaba and Avaric's loathing of each other, especially in vinkunwildflowerqueen's Breakfast Club oneshot, so I thought I'd give Elpharic a go (make sure, if you haven't, to go and check out both of these writers)!

Note: this is VERY AU, obviously. Here, Galinda and Fiyero are still going out, although the hat scene at the OzDust took place so they ARE friends with Elphaba. In addition, the Lion Cub scene has not and will not happen in this story, so Dillamond is still teaching and essentially, Elphaba, Galinda, Fiyero, Boq and Nessa have become a big friendship group. Tbh, I have absolutely no idea if this is a plotline that's been used before, but if it has I sincerely apologise.

I should also warn you that I am certainly not going full out in terms of my writing style with this one. Usually, I like to publish pretty arty stuff, but this is purely meant to be fun and lighthearted, so don't expect long, meandering descriptions like in Alike or Syreni. :)

Without further ado, here's the story!

The Ultimate Test

Chapter One:

The cafe in Railway Square had become something of a safe-haven for the students of Shiz University. It was one of the most popular meeting places, and indeed, many friendship groups had adopted it is their main "hanging out" zone. Who could blame them? The friendly, serene and therapeutic atmosphere was undeniable to even the most cynical pessimist, and it provided an escape from the studying strifes of overdue essays and long, time consuming lectures.

One such friendship group that the enjoyed the comforts of the cafe was that of Fiyero, Glinda, Boq, Nessarose and Elphaba. If someone, for whatever reason, was looking to find the usually inseparable group, the first place they'd inevitably resort to was there. Be it morning, afternoon and evening, you could proably count on glancing through the large glass windows of the cafe and seeing them sat on the leather armchair in the corner, sipping their various preferred coffee types and gossiping like... well, like gossipy university students.

Undoubtedly, the bubbly and slightly too pink-obsessed Galinda was the main source of chatter amongst them, and on that fateful Friday morning, she was relaying it to her friends with an intimidating ferocity.

'I just can't believe that I ever actually liked those two!' she cried, shaking her head in apparently genuine distress.

Her boyfriend, the scandalacious Vinkun prince Fieryo Tiggular, was trying and failing to hide his obvious amusement at the blonde's bitching. 'Yeah, Pfannee and Shenshen are pretty annoying.'

'I know! All they ever do is talk about fashion. It's so shallow.'

Fiyero and Boq shared a meaningful glance, both thinking it somewhat hypocritical for Galinda to criticise her previous "besties" for being interested in clothing. At that moment, she was wearing a pink dress with an almost ridiculous multitude of frills; overall, it left staggeringly little to the imagination.

The prince took a sip of his coffee. 'They're attractive though,' he commented, which earned him a death glare from Galinda.

Nessa sighed, oblivious to the fact they were clearly joking. 'Honestly, all you two do is argue. Are you really incapable of getting through one conversation without offending each other?'

Boq laughed. 'Trust Nessa to play the righteous card.'

Fiyero burst into an impersonation. 'Honestly, how could you possibly consider making a joke? The Unnamed God would surely disapprove!'

Nessa blushed bright pink, which only evoked further giggles from the group. Eventually, Boq gently squeezed the wheelchair-bound girl's hand, if anything only deepening her embarassment.

The tender moment elicited a typically Galinda-esque squeal. 'Oh, you two are just the cutest! I'm so glad you ended up together.'

As the couple glanced away bashfully, Fiyero raised an eyebrow. 'You act as if it wasn't entirely down to you that they did.'

She smiled but waved it off. 'Oh, my involvement was really quite limited.'

'Need I remind you of the party at the OzDust you organised solely for the occasion?' he asked.

'Or the hours you spent convincing me that it was a mistake to break up with her in the first place?' Boq added.

'Or the additional hours you spent telling me the invitation wasn't intended as a show of sympathy?'

She looked away but was evidently pleased at the praise lavished on her efforts. 'Well... the party was quite amazifying.' A frown suddenly contorted her countenance. 'It was a shame Elphaba didn't come though. I bought a new dress for her and everything.'

Boq snorted. 'Oh yes, because we all know parties at the OzDust, Elphaba and clothing provided by you is a fantastic combination.'

She decided to ignore this remark.

Fiyero glanced towards the entrance of the coffee shop. 'Incidentally, where is Elphaba?' He checked his watch. 'It's almost nine o'clock.'

'Yeah,' Boq said. 'She's usually the first one here.'

Galinda wrinkled her nose. 'Studying,' she told them.

'What for?'

'Her Sorcery final.'

'But that's almost three months away!'

'And you're surprised because...?'

Fiyero looked horrified, and Galinda smiled. 'To be frank, I'm amazed you're even aware what studying is, let alone when your exams are coming up.'

The horror quickly morphed into a rather annoyed scowl, which of course only encouraged their witch-like cackling all the more. 'That was low.'

'Tell me- was it three universities you'd been expelled from before Shiz, Yero?' Nessa teased.

The fact that even she was getting in on the jokes elicited a bluster, 'Well, I take solace in the fact that unlike Elphaba, I have a social life outside of this group.'

The giggling ceased immediately. 'Whoa, calm down,' Boq said, sounding taken back. 'We were just having fun.'

Fiyero closed his eyes for a heartbeat. 'I know- it's just- I guess I'm a bit stressed out over these exams already. I don't wanna get kicked out of Shiz as well. Unlike the other places, I kinda like it here.'

'Perhaps you could spend a bit more time with Elphaba? She'd help you out.'

The cheeky smirk returned faster than it had left. 'Come on Boq. I'm not that desperate.'

And then, like a proverbial and horrifically overused flash, the welcomed camaraderie returned. It was a quality that all six of the group appreciated- the ability to be easygoing and equally supportive with each other simultaneously.

'In fairness, Yero was right about one thing,' Galinda said. 'We really need to get Elphaba's nose out of textbooks more often.'

In actuality, when Galinda used the first person plural pronoun "we", she meant the first person singular pronoun "I". Ever since that partly disastrous, partly miraculous incident with the pointed hat, Galinda had declared it some form of personal crusade to help Elphaba become as popular as she was. The first, and indeed already accomplished, part of the mission was to establish her in a steady friendship group- from this, the five of them had emerged, and they were all far happier as a result. The effect was most noticeable in the green girl however, whose confidence and self-esteem appeared to have improved immensely. The next stage, involving getting Elphaba dressed in more socially acceptable clothes, hadn't worked out quite so well, but Galinda certainly wasn't one to give up.

'There's another party at the Gentleman's Club coming up soon,' she murmured, a little absently. 'I might be able to get her to attend.'

The three others met eyes. It had become a topic of near constant discussion amongst them over who was going to break the news to Galinda. Months had passed since when they'd become friends and Elphaba wasn't a milimetre closer to being popular. All of them thought it was probably time to make the Gilikan face the music: Elphaba was perfectly happy as she was.

At long last, Nessa decided to take the initiative. 'Listen Galinda- I know your intention is to help my sister, believe me, but has it occured to you she might... well-'

'Not want to be changed?' Fiyero interjected pointedly.

Galinda raised her head. 'The ignorant just don't know any better!' she exclaimed. 'That girl has so much potential. With a splash of makeup and a new wardrobe, she'll be fully Galindafied.'

'That's exactly the point,' Fiyero replied. 'You're two completely different people. I mean, can you really imagine her wearing the sort of clothes you do?'

'She's stubborn,' came her insistent reply. 'Besides, pink goes well with green.'

He looked away, frustrated that words left him devoid of a proper answer. The smug look of satisfaction that settled over his girlfriend's face did little to assuage him.

'Oh, I can't wait to see Elphie when she's popular,' she rambled, sub-conciously beginning to count things off on her slender fingers. 'I simply have to take her and get some stilettos, and some new dresses for summer. Oooh, then we can have makeovers in dorm and talk about boys! I bet she'll even be dating by then-'

'Oh yeah, because that's gonna happen. No one could like Fae romantically regardless of popularity.'

Sometimes, there are times where you're left pondering why in the Wizard's name you thought it was good idea to speak. At that point, Fiyero experienced one of them. Boq and Nessa looked at him as if he'd just announced he was in truth a repressed Unionist, and Galinda seemed positively furious.

'That was uncalled for-' Nessa began, but the Gilikan got their first.

'Fiyero Tiggular, you massive, unparalleled jerk!'

'What? It's true!' he defended, feeling worse by the second. 'Fae's my friend, but we have to admit her chances are pretty minimal. She's as green as the Emerald City.'

'And you're as much of a douchebag as Avaric,' Galinda snapped.

Boq glanced between them uneasily. 'Guys, please-'

'Come off it. You know that I'm right.'

Her face was flushing bright red. 'Elphie's beautiful! Of course guys want to go out with her!'

'Go on then. Name one.'

Galinda bit her lip, and in the silence that followed, Fiyero wished he had the good grace to back out of the argument and apologise. For some reason, he couldn't bring himself to force the words out. He knew how close the blonde and Elphaba had become over the last few months, almost to the point where if someone insulted her skin colour Galinda got just as if not more annoyed, but in the heat of the moment it barely crossed his mind.

'Fine.' With a huff, the pink-adorned girl stood up crossly, arms folded around her midriff. 'I'm the best matchmaker in all of Shiz! I bet you that by the end of the month I could get Elphaba on a date with any boy at all in our year.'

Fiyero's eyes widened, as did those of Nessa and Boq. All of them realised things were veering sharply out of control, but both of the participants in the argument were far too worked up to give up on it now.

The prince shifted in his seat, in a state of clear discomfort. Upon noticing that his girlfriend was turning to leave, the same victorious smirk on her face as before, he blurted out the first thing that popped into his head.

'Well, if I'm comparable to him in your eyes, how about Avaric?'

Silence.

Silence.

And a little more silence.

Eventually, Galinda closed her mouth, which had fallen open in shock at Fiyero's suggestion. She attempted to retain a cool expression, but understood how impossibly difficult to escape the hole she'd dug herself was. This was the kind of hole that you couldn't see the bottom of, whereupon if you fell in, you'd surely be lost and forgotten forever. Nonetheless, she was far too proud to decline.

'Alright, Yero,' she practically hissed. 'When I'm finished, Avaric and Elphaba are going to be so blindly in love, you'll regret... you'll regret... you'll regret something!'

With that, she twisted on her heels and marched out of the cafe, vaguely resembling an angry pink storm cloud.

Okay, I know what you're thinking- it was melodramatic and cheesy and overall pretty rubbish. Still, I have to admit I had an awful lot of fun writing it! I suppose it's kinda nice to waste time writing something without having to pay loads of attention to detail- just for the fun of it, you know? Not that I dislike doing my usual material- quite the contrary.

Anyways, I'll probably update this story on and off. I have my priority fanfics to work on simultaneously, but I churned this out in about three hours so I might be able to get something done every weekend. Then again, my periods of motivation and so sporadic that's probably quite unlikely. Still, hope you'll enjoy them when they come!

Please consider leaving a review and telling me your thoughts on the opening chapter. :P

-Claud