Hi! So, I'm British Columbia, one of Canada's provinces. I'm also the best place on Earth. No, seriously. It's like official and crap. So Disneyland can kiss my ass. Well, I'm bored and tired of being secluded (with the ocean on one side, and mountains surrounding everywhere else, it's hard to get out), so I thought maybe I'd do that letters thing everyone seems to be doing.
So, before you write to me, you should know a little bit about me, right? I mean you've probably heard of Vancouver, but that's not all there is! My name is Victoria Charlotte Fraser, and I AM A GIRL, no matter how many people mistake me for a dude. I don't get very much of the snow and cold my neighbours are always complaining about (okay, so the North and the Interior are freezing in the winter, but nobody lives there!), but I get LOTS of rain. People call me the gateway to Asia, which is awesome because I love Asians~. I also love the outdoors and being active. I have serious hockey rage (riot, anyone?), and I might have a tiny little pot addiction. I am NOT an England fangirl, anymore that is, but he's still pretty cool. I was one of his colonies for a while (three that got smushed into one, if you wanna be technical), even if it was only for a short time, so like most of his ex-colonies I see him as a big brother. I'm beautiful, and love being reminded of it often.
Oh, and I can't speak French. Not one bit. I don't get what the big deal is, but it pisses off Quebec so I'll consider it a good thing. I do speak languages that aren't English, though – Mandarin, Cantonese, and Punjabi – so when my neighbours confuse me with French I can tell them to eat shit without any of them knowing it.
Compared to the rest of the provinces and territories, I'm kind of a loner – Quebec and New Brunswick have that whole French thing going on, the Rupert siblings are all close, the Maritimes are the happiest looking family you'll ever see, Ontario and Quebec are so obvious about their feelings it's sickening –, but I consider Washington and Oregon to be my bros. People joke that Hong Kong and I are twins who were separated at birth, but I really do think of him like a brother.
Well, I'm just gonna sit here and wait for some letters. Maybe I'll get high.
Oh, and Canada's making me apologize for Carly Rae Jepsen. She was good before Call Me Maybe, okay? Of course, I wouldn't have to apologize for Carly's crappy new music if Ontario had just taken Justin Bieber back…
~The beautiful British Columbia