A/N: This is based on two prompts someone sent me from tumblr. This is a combination of two prompts. I misunderstood the first prompt so in the end I mashed up both. OTL. This will be divided into two parts though. And this is a complementary fic to Insomnia. :D

The realisation of how fickle human beings are hit Mikorin right in the face when he realised how much Mayumayu has been invading his life. At first it was just texting for the sake of replying to his "idol" but over the past few weeks that they've been exchanging messages, their conversations also changed directions. From the usual convo regarding irrelevant things like how does mayumayu keep her blog updated and such and who helps her, or about mayumayu's drawing tips and things like that to actually opening up to each other about their lives, their thoughts and their expectations.

Nozaki and Sakura notices that Mikorin is always on his phone. Both of them would exchange glances and would spew ridiculous things like how Mikorin has been cheating on Suzuki—this dramatic raves were always initiated by Sakura. Nozaki, the doting creator that he is would join her and accuse Mikorin of being an infidel not knowing that his brother was the one to blame for making Mikorin act that way. Mikorin would be flustered and feel embarrassed and stutter as he tries to explain, saying that it wasn't like that and why does Suzuki always get into the picture whenever his love life was involved? He would rant half crying and half angry.

Mikorin, because of his attachment to his phone would always be exasperated at his friends. He promises to himself that he wouldn't be as phone conscious whenever he's with them for the threat of a barrage of questions and ridiculous conversations. This was a difficult thing to do though, because even in the mornings, even when he has classes, all he thinks about is Mayumayu and he can't help but feel he's in the clouds whenever he begins to daydream about her. His mind in a haze, his fingers would automatically search for his phone to see whether she sent a message.

Mayumayu as if to humour him would frequently text him, in the morning a simple "Good morning", in the afternoon a simple greeting and a brief narration about what she's been up to, and at night, well their nocturnal conversations were his favourite. They could just talk about anything under the sun and it always made him happy. He saves their conversations and rereads them from time to time and by the time he tucks himself in bed not replying to the last message from Mayumayu because he's afraid to fall even deeper and appear clingy, he tries to contemplate about their relationship. He was never the thinking type, he knows he's naive and a bit of an airhead, but his experience in his video games and in shojo manga points him to love. He was falling deeper and harder for Mayumayu as time passes by. He blushes upon realising his own feelings. It makes sense, the way his heart would beat faster whenever his phone rings, or how it skips when he sees Mayumayu's name on his cellphone screen was a symptom of love. It was obvious in the way his eyes would light up and the way his chest would feel warm whenever he reads her messages. No matter how many times he rereads them, they elicit in him the same beautiful feeling. How could one explain it? Other than the fact that it was perhaps love? He buries his face on his pillow and purses his lips, his face burning and his mind topsy turvy because of the realization. He tries to take a deep breath and then force himself to think clearly about the situation. He was not really in love with Mayumayu he tells himself, how could he? How could one fall in love with another merely by texts? He turns to the side and try to drown out his thoughts and concentrate on sleeping. And just like that he falls asleep, too tired of thinking about his feelings about Mayumayu.

For Mayu's part, he was troubled because it was the first time that he felt motivated using his phone. And like Mikorin, he too cannot go on without his phone. Because of that, his friends were proud of him. Kobayashi, the one who pushed him to try to talk to Mamiko was in tears because of this development like a mother proud of his son's accomplishments. He pats Mayu on the back and tells him to keep up the good work. Mayu is confused even more. What was the meaning of all of this? Has he gotten over his infatuation with Judo? Mayu furrows his brows, an expression new to the eyes of his friends because Mayu's facial expression never changes, it was always blank. This was the first time they saw him genuinely troubled about something.

"What's wrong Maa-kun?"

Mayu buries his face on his arms and tells Kobayashi that he's drained. Kobayashi was surprised because he didn't recall Mayu doing anything that would require him to exert effort.

"That's not good Nozaki.." Another friend comments.

"At this rate you can't do club activities. It's fine, if you don't feel at it today." The friend pats him in the back too much that Kobayashi went pale.

"Maa-kun.."

"...home, I don't feel good." Mayu deadpanned.

Mayu was having a difficult time trying to figure his own feelings. And more than that, he couldn't concentrate even in judo or anything else because of texting Mamiko. He enjoyed talking with the girl and truth be told, he was convinced that he actually became attached to her. She was nice and caring, always worrying about him and kind of shy. He could tell by the way she texts. Because of those characteristics he couldn't help but find a resemblance with Mamiko and a character of his elder brother's with the same more than that resemblance, he feels like she knows her very well. He shrugs these thoughts and thinks about how the thought of her is getting in the way of his Judo and it doesn't feel right for him. If he keeps going on like this, they might lose at the upcoming tournament. That was why he was so conflicted. In the end, he decides to stop texting Mamiko all together.

Mikorin was troubled and confused why Mayumayu stopped texting him. He tried to think of possible reasons why she would do that. He shifts from asking "Did I creep her out?" to "Did I say something to her that was rude or inappropriate?" and then he starts to tear up because he couldn't imagine not receiving Mayumayu's texts ever.

He was so nervous about mayumayu's silence that he couldn't concentrate on anything. Kashima was getting worried about him because he was being overly clumsy the past days and most of the time he looks like an empty vessel of a human being. Nozaki and Sakura were worried as well. Mikorin stopped coming at Nozaki's place and Nozaki was really having a hard time because he needed Mikorin's skill at drawing flowers for his manga. His editor was also already pissed at him because he keeps on stalling on passing his draft. There was trouble brewing with the gang and it was all because of Mikorin's broken heart.

Nozaki, Sakura and Kashima tried to cheer Mikorin up to no avail. They tried finding out about what was draining him and failed to realise that it was because of Mayumayu. In the end, Kashima figured it all out.

"I know what's up with him."

"You do Kashima-kun?"

"Good job Kashima!" Nozaki said eyes beaming and all, too happy because of the possibility of the old Mikorin being back.

"It's probably because of his phone or something. I realised ever since he stopped using it he started being like a zombie."

"But what could be the reason?'

The three of them pondered.

"Could it be?"

"Could it be what Nozaki?"

"It must be because I kept on bugging him about coming to my place and forcing him to eat all of the desserts I made?"

"What's that got anything to do with anything? In normal circumstances he would probably be happy. But..."

"It must be because of Mayumayu then?" Sakura interjected.

"You know, they used to always exchange messages and we know for a fact that Mikorin has always been so conscious of his phone lately. It must be because of that?"

"I think so too."

"So what do we do now? How do we find this Mayumayu chick?"

"Let's try sending a message to her blog."

Nozaki opened his phone and went to Mayumayu's blogsite. He typed something on the message box and clicked send.

hi...

The three of them waited for a response but there wasn't any.

"Is she dead or something?"

"Kashima-kun that's a bit harsh you know."

Nozaki was typing.

hello.. this is Mamiko. How are you?

Still there was no response. Nozaki was beginning to lose hope. Mayumayu still hasn't replied even once. But then he thought of something.

"Sakura, why don't you try talking to Mikoshiba?"

"Eh? Bbbuuut... No..Nozaki-kun I can't.. I don't know how to." Sakura stuttered. She was actually nervous and not prepared to talk to Mikorin since she's thinks she can't help because of her lack of experience. Nevertheless, she tried her hardest to find what was troubling Mikorin. Mikorin on the other hand was responsive much to her surprise. He told her what happened about him and Mayumayu.

"Why don't you talk to her Mikorin? Why don't you arrange a meet up or something?"

"I don't know.. I just.. I just don't think she'll want to see me."

"Mikorin, you know. You won't know if you won't try. Try sending her a text, ask her why she doesn't reply to your messages.."

"Sakura, if it were you.. what would you do?"

"Mm.. me? What's with that question all of a sudden?"

Mikorin faced her with serious eyes that she was forced to answer. She was sweating real hard because she wasn't prepared for such a question.

"Well.. if it were me..." Her eyes drifted from side to side and she was fidgeting. While she was figuring out what to answer, she caught a sight of Nozaki and immediately flushed scarlet and cowered out of embarrassment.

"Well.. if it were me... I guess.. I guess... I'll want to talk to him and ask him what's wrong.. but then again, I'm fine with our current arrangement. It makes me happy and gives me the privilege of being with him as much as I please, unlike before".

Sakura's answer was not responsive of Mikorin's question. He knew this was going to happen, he knew that Sakura always connects everything to her relationship with Nozaki. Though, it's not that Mikorin can be bothered with it. Mikorin sighed. Sakura noticed that she wasn't helping. She tried saving their conversation and fumbled with words.

"Ch.. Cheer up Mikorin! No matter what, we'll be cheering for you." Sakura beams. Yet the only thing Mikorin could respond was a broken smile. He went home still feeling out of it.

There were no apparent changes with Mayu's behaviour after he decided to give up his phone to Kobayashi. It was not that difficult convincing his friend to take his phone and be his scribe again because he told him he was worried about the upcoming tournament. He didn't explain everything to him but the latter understood and agreed on keeping it for the time being.

It has been days since he last conversed with Mamiko and he was experiencing an emotional turmoil that he's never experienced before. He could not sleep well because he was full of thoughts of Mamiko and he can't help but unconsciously search for his phone whenever he hears a tiny beeping sound. Because of this, his energy dropped. Mayu realized that there was no use in letting Kobayashi take his phone and cutting off ties with Mamiko because there was no difference, it only worsened the situation. He concludes that it was a bad idea to give his phone up to Kobayashi. He rolls on the bed and and tries desperately hard to fall asleep. Yet, he still couldn't shake the thought of Mamiko, he still couldn't think straight. His brain was all clogged up with all of their conversations and he can't help but wonder what Mamiko was doing at the moment. It was causing him to feel mixed emotions, and he has this urge of wanting to see Mamiko so much. He also feels a very strong feeling of sadness when he remembers her and it's killing him. He swallows a lump on his throat and allowed his thoughts to wonder. This time, he succeeded being free from Mamiko's clutches but the one who came to mind was his elder brother's friend, Mikoshiba. He couldn't help but utter "Mikoto-san" as his thoughts lingered on the red head. Mayu felt weird, but the calm that the thought of Mikorin brought him was a like lullaby. His eyelids felt heavy and ultimately he fell asleep with the thought of Mikorin.

The next day, Mayu decides to visit his brother to take a breather. When he arrived there was no one there but Mikorin who was coincidentally waiting for Nozaki to come home. He sat outside Nozaki's door with folded knees. Mayu remembered what happened last night when he thought of Mikorin without rhyme or reason. He felt something foreign in his chest and he felt his hand went cold. He clenched them and sauntered towards Mikorin. He noticed that the red head was feeling sullen and was quiet. He seemed not to have noticed Mayu and it was bothering the younger male. Mayu tried to ask him something but hesitated at the instant Mikorin's eyes dropped, sadness evident in his crimson orbs. After a while, Mikorin who was immersed in his own world looked over his shoulder and saw Mayu standing there staring at him. Mayu loomed over him and had quite an imposing presence. He felt the air stale, he felt his surroundings press against him.

Mayu noticed that there was a spark of recognition in Mikorin's eyes. That's when he knew that Mikorin finally saw him.

"Ah, it's you Mayu. Nozaki forgot his key at School so he's going back to get it."

"Ah, I see."

There was awkward silence after they exchanged greetings. Mikorin avoided looking at him. The redhead buried his face on his arms and was sitting still. Mayu sauntered towards him, bridging the gap between the two of them bit by bit with every stride he made and sat beside his senior. His clothes rustled as he settled himself. The sound of Mikorin's breathing, was the only thing that rang in his ears.

The silence was becoming overbearing and he wonders why it was so. He steals a glance at Mikorin and notices that the elder man had fallen asleep, his hand clutching on to his phone. He leans and tries to take a peek at the other's sleeping face and finds a bead of tear at the corner of Mikorin's eyes. He leans in a bit closer and tries to brush Mikorin's bangs away from his face so that he could see his countenance more clearly. He sighs and moves even more closer and moves his whole body for that final glance at the elder man's face and then he feels it. That feeling when for the first time in your life you've found what you've been looking for. That feeling when you realise for the first time how it meant to be held captive by someone, when all the missing pieces all came together. That moment when everything made sense. Deep inside him, he knew something was connecting him and this man. He swallows a lump on his throat and fights the feeling of wanting to hold Mikorin in his arms. He turns his gaze away from him but could not resist to come back to the ground of Mikorin's image. A tear sluiced down Mikorin's face, it fell onto his feet, glittering like a diamond for a second. His grip on his phone was loosening and then it fell and Mayu was able to see his unfinished message for a person named Mayumayu.

Can I see you?...

Those words struck Mayu. He clenched his teeth and was about to touch Mikorin when the redhead woke up at the clattering sound his phone made on the ground. He takes his hand away and just stares at the redhead as he panics and checks whether his phone was damaged or not. More than knowing Mikorin was Mamiko, the fact that he was the reason Mikorin was out of sorts made him deeply rueful of what he's done. He had been terribly selfish and because of that he hurt him.

Mayu did not care about the true identity of Mamiko. But now, it made sense. Everything made sense. All this time, Mamiko and Mikoto-san were the same person no wonder he thought of him. Everything faded into the background, Mayu was left in his own world. He lifted his eyes and dragged himself back to reality, to where Mikorin was. He tried to bridge the gap between the two of them by telling him that he was mayumayu. His lips parted in preparation for the utterance of words that precedes that long awaited confession but his elder brother interrupts them and he loses his chance to tell him the truth.

Now that all the pieces came together, the revelation of his identity should have been done, but the possibility of not being able to say it gnaws at his throat. He couldn't say anything as his brother sauntered towards the door with Mikorin following behind him. The clinking of the keys and the soft footsteps against the floor were too deafening. The look in Mikorin's face, sullen and stiff looking up to his brother's stoic face made him lose the ability to control his surroundings. It felt like the ground beneath his feet was crumbling along with his heart.

So this was frustration and possessiveness.

Nozaki opened the door to his apartment and invited both of them in. Mikorin was the first to enter and quietly settled himself inside. Mayu was left outside, if his elder brother didn't call for him, he may have been left there. Mayu obeys and goes inside the room trying to hold himself together. The feeling of being foreign in his own skin was oppressing him. He didn't like the fact that he was feeling frustration and possessiveness well inside his heart. He didn't like being shaken like this. He settles across Mikorin and stares at him, his face as blank as ever, a total contrast of the turmoil inside his chest. His eyes drift from every corner of Mikorin's figure, and he couldn't help but notice every tiny detail about Mikorin. The way his eyes looked heavy, the dark circles underneath them and the way his facial expression was stiff made his heart clench. This was all his fault.

Mikorin noticed that he was being stared at. Rather than calling Mayu out, he just pretended not to notice. But he couldn't help not lift his eyes to see whether or not the younger man was still looking at him. His upturned eyes caught Mayu's. They held each other's gaze for awhile. There was something in the way Mayu looked at him that was different than usual.

Mikorin was enveloped by panic. Looking directly into Mayu's eyes scared him, so he looked away and smiled nervously as he was trying to make conversation. He tried to be as cheerful as he usually was to appease Mayu and to tell Nozaki that there was nothing to worry about. But Mayu couldn't be fooled. Because the look on Mikorin's eyes gave him away.

"What's wrong Mikoto-san? You're not yourself today."

Nozaki was shocked at his brother's comment and tried formulating things on his head on how to change the topic.

"Mikorin.. What flower we'll be using in this panel?" He says nervously, his eyes drifting side to side.

He comes in between the two and nervously looks at Mikorin. Nozaki tries again to make conversation using the first thing that comes to mind. Good thing it did not came out ridiculous. Mayu sensed that there was something off about how his brother was acting around Mikorin. He glances at Mikorin and observes him as he was talking with his elder brother about flowers. The redhead then stops talking and went back to drawing.

The ever enthusiastic and cheerful Mikorin was now somber and quiet. It was like looking at a flower slowly dying out. Mayu blinks and closes his eyes for a second to abate the urge of wanting to cheer the redhead up but he didn't do anything. He opened his eyes and just stared at him intently as if embedding his image deep into his mind. Yet the thought of him comes out as a soliloquy.

"Mikoto-san.."

Mikorin hears him and raises his eyes. Mayu looks away and says nothing.

"Mayu.. It's getting late. " Nozaki comments.

Mayu nods and picks up his things and tells his brother that he's going to borrow some of his manga. The younger man fixes his things and stands up to go.

"I'll be going now." He says, his eyes focusing only at Mikorin who was quiet still.

"Take care Mayu." The red head replies when he's already in front of the door. Mayu smiles a little and whispers goodbye. Before he left, he steals one last glance at Mikorin and sees him concentrating with all his might on what he was doing. The scratching sound of pencil rang in his ears, the strokes sounded rushed, unsteady and heavy. That night he went to Kobayashi's house to get his phone back and spent the whole evening thinking about Mikorin and how much his feelings toward him was worth the risk.

Mayu learns about Mikorin's feelings towards Mamiko from his brother and he couldn't help but feel frustrated at that. Even though they were one and the same person, it was difficult to compete with Mikorin's expectation of Mamiko. For him, Mamiko would always be a cute girl just like in his games, and would be someone completely opposite of himself, the sporty and manly one, not to mention he's a guy. And that's what makes it difficult, more than confessing and revealing he's Mayumayu. He sighs and an ache bubbles in his throat. More than ever he concentrates on Judo and trains even more than ever just to forget.

Mikorin finally sends Mayumayu a text message after much deliberation with himself.

Did I do something wrong?

He shuts his phone and sighs expecting Mayumayu not to reply. But after awhile his phone beeps and an alert message was on his phone saying that he just received a message from Mayumayu. He immediately fumbles with the keys and opens Mayumayu's message.

I want to see you.

As much as Mayu wants to hide the truth about Mayumayu for Mikorin's sake and to cut their ties smoothly because of what he learned from his brother, he didn't want to keep lying to Mikorin about his identity. That would just be equivalent to playing with the elder man's feelings. So he decides to arrange a meeting.

Mikorin was surprised at Mayumayu's message, he was excited but at the same time, he felt his heart clench. He felt that there was something to this meeting that wasn't supposed to be. Maybe Mayumayu wanted to meet him to finally put their "friendship" to a stop and he doesn't like that. Moreover, she will end up disappointed since Mikorin's not really a girl. He's been lying to her all this time and that makes him doubt about the viability of keeping their current relationship. He shakes his head and doesn't reply. Meeting up at this rate was as impossible as holding the stars so instead he turns his phone off.

Mayu was worried why Mikorin didn't reply, he didn't have any idea why he wouldn't. He was expecting the redhead to agree to meet him but there was no word from him. He didn't respond. This was a sign of rejection. Mikorin didn't want to see him. His usual enthusiasm for Judo has dwindled miserably because of too much thinking about Mikorin but he decides that he won't run away any more, he can't bear the thought of making Mikorin miserable. He opens his phone and starts typing.

Mamiko-san...

He deletes what he has written and writes something different.

I'm sorry...

Apologizing felt wrong. He deletes what he has written again and decides to give up. He sighs and slumps on the bed.

"Mikoto-san..."

Mayu decides to wait for Mikorin outside their gate. When Mikorin saw him, the redhead was perplexed so he went to Nozaki's classroom and told him Mayu was waiting for him.

"Ah, that. Mayu told me he had some business with you. I forgot to tell you."

"Dammit Nozaki, he's been waiting there for how long already?"

"Ma.. Ma... He wouldn't mind. Just go to him already." Nozaki deadpanned shooing Mikorin away. Mikorin clicked his tongue and stormed out of the classroom.

Mikorin thought about Mayu's possible business with him and couldn't find any. When he arrived at the gate he asked Mayu about what he was doing at the gate. And the younger man, avoiding his eyes told him he wanted to see him. Mikorin was embarrassed, he didn't know what to do.

"What?"

"Mikoto-san..."

"Just a minute okay..."

Mikorin's mind was hurting and he was doing all kinds of gesticulation in front of Mayu because he didn't know what to say nor feel.

"Mikoto-san.. I just want to tell you something."

"Wait.."

"I..."

Mikorin covered Mayu's mouth and was flustered up to his ears.

"Wait just a minute you bastard. What the hell is wrong you just coming here all of a sudden just to say embarrassing things?"

"But.."

"No buts. Arg, I give up. I know Nozaki must have told you something, but don't worry. I'm fine."

When Mikorin realised how awkward it was for him to cover Mayu's mouth with both of his hands, he immediately took them away and apologized.

"Mikoto-san.. Can we go somewhere after this?"

"Haaaa? What are you talking about?"

Mikorin noticed how disappointed Mayu looked and then, because he felt bad he decided to come with the younger man.

"Oh all right."

Mayu smiled at him slightly and then his heart skipped a beat. It was the first time he saw Nozaki's younger brother do something close to a smile.

"Well, I'll just wait for you here."

"Okay, I'll just pick up my bag."

"So what did you want to talk about Mayu? Even to the extent of picking me up at school."

Mayu was silent, thinking about it was so much easier than actually doing it. He was not sure anymore whether this was the right thing to do. He was afraid that in the end this would end in a catastrophe.

They were walking side by side and Mayu was was feeling a little bit conscious of himself walking together with Mikorin. Mikorin was like usual, and for some reason he seems to be feeling a lot better now. The therapy his friends did was probably effective, that is keeping himself busy so that he could not think of Mayumayu no longer.

"Mikoto-san.."

Mayu looked over his shoulder to look at Mikorin. Mikorin stopped walking and waited for Mayu to say something.

"What is it?"

Mayu's voice was caught up on his throat. The cherry blossom petals fell on Mikorin's head like confetti and truth be told it was such a beautiful sight that he couldn't help but stare. The redhead was oblivious of the fact that there were cherry blossom petals on his head and was shocked when Mayu moved an inch closer to him and picked up something on his head. His heart skipped a beat at the younger man's closeness. They rarely even spend time together even more so being alone just the two them walking on the streets like this so the feeling of his closeness and this intimacy was scaring him. Mayu picked up the pink petals. After that he let the wind blow them away apart from a petal. He took Mikorin's hand and opened it, he then put the petal on the palm of Mikorin's hand.

"..."

"hmm?"

"I just wanted to tell you about mayumayu..."

"Haaaaaa? Did Nozaki tell you something?"

"No. He didn't tell me anything..."

"Arg.."

Mikorin was so embarrassed that he refused to listen to Mayu. He took his hand away with much force making the younger man flinched a little.

"Shut up.. I don't want to hear anything about it. I.. I've had enough.. I don't want to talk anything that has something to do with her."

Mikorin covered his ears so that he could not hear what Mayu was going to say. Mayu was a little bit disappointed but still continued to act like he was okay. It was a good thing he's poker-faced.

"Ah, I see. .. But have you ever wanted to meet her in person Mikoto-san?"

"Of course I do! I want to really meet her, but I don't want to disappoint her, I don't want her to think that I've been lying to her this whole time, about everything."

"Then..."

"I want to meet her, but I can't." Mikorin smiled at Mayu, a broken smile that made the younger man's heart clench.

So it was the same for Mikorin, they both didn't want to disappoint the other.

"But what if he's also feeling like you Mikoto-san? What if she also wants to meet you to finally tell you the truth? What if he's hiding something from you this whole time too?"

"Well, Well, you seem to be fairly motivated to talk ha Mayu? What's got into you?"

Mayu stopped walking.

"What's wrong Mayu?"

"I like you Mikoto-san."

Mikorin turned red at the younger man's words. He couldn't believe what he just heard. Mayu was avoiding his gaze. When the younger one raised his eyes to meet his, now it was his turn to look away.

"I like you Mikoto-san.." He repeated.

Mayu walked towards him.

"Can I please embrace you?"

"What are you talking about you idiot? Who likes whom? And why are you talking like that..."

"Mikoto-san.."

Mikorin was in panic, he didn't know what to do, he didn't know how to respond to Mayu. He closed his eyes shut and ran away, leaving the younger man all alone standing underneath the cherry blossom tree. His footsteps reverberated in his ears and his fast beating heart was like a time bomb to his ears. He was in utter shock. He was afraid of what he was feeling. He was not prepared for what was bound to happen now that Mayu told him what he felt towards him. How can he face him from now on?

"I like you Mikoto-san.."

The younger man's voice echoed in his mind. And he couldn't help but feel helpless now that he discovered that he has a soft spot for him. He rans much faster and grinds his teeth.

"How does that twerp know about liking someone? When he can't even get motivated to do anything apart from judo?"

The air blew strongly dissipating the petals of the cherry blossom tree. The foliage that was neatly swept scattered all over. Mayu turned on his heels and walked in the opposite direction from where Mikorin went. He pondered about his actions and how he's ruined everything.

He contemplated and thought about his actions. Of why it was difficult not to confess then and there to Mikorin because his mind has been full of thoughts of him. He was distracted, and that made him too conscious of the redhead and too conscious of himself. The moment the cherry blossoms fell on Mikorin's head, with their speed and the way they gleamed against the stray of sunlight panelling through the branches made his limbs move on its own. At that moment, he felt like he was a different person, he felt like he was not in his own skin. He felt guilty about his actions. But that instant, when the cherry blossoms fell, and Mikorin's face covered by the shadows of the branches, his eyes not meeting his gaze and the way his lips parted and closed made him feel a rush of excitement that he's never felt before. His chest was suffused with a warm feeling, his heartbeat was loudly thumping against his ribcage that it felt like it was about to burst. He could feel his emotions rise up in his throat and his eyes widened, pupils dilating as the beauty of Mikorin oppressed him. The look in his upturned eyes, innocent and oblivious of how much feelings he made Mayu feel made the younger man's emotions spill over. And he told him the very words that could mend and break relationships.

"I like you."

"I like you."

He speaks it again and again and again hoping that the wind would carry this message to wherever Mikorin was. But what was the point of hoping for the wind to carry his message to Mikorin when clearly, he's ruined their fragile relationship? When clearly he was out of bounds, he shook Mikorin to the core. He could see it in the way his eyes widened when he confessed. He wasn't sure whether he saw him wear an expression of disgust or pity, or both. Mayu went home feeling glum. Mikorin on the other hand was still wandering the streets trying to forget about what happened with Mayu. He still couldn't believe what the younger man said to him. Was he serious? Or was he just playing with him? He opens his phone and checks whether Mayumayu sent him a message. There was none. He types on his phone and was deliberating with himself whether to reply to Mayumayu or not. He blushes and then forgets about what happened with Mayu. Rather than replying he reads Mayumayu's messages.

... thanks for the advice. Yeah, my friend liked it very much.

... you're so easy to talk to. It makes me want to know more.

... what are you doing?

... have you eaten yet?

... thank you.

... you remind me of someone.

His heart clenched when he read the other messages. He missed talking to her. Mayu on the other hand just got home and was going up his room to change his clothes. He puts his bag on his desk and rather than change he slumped on the bed and covered his face with his arm. He closed his eyes and allowed his thoughts to drift. Mikorin's image popped into his mind. It doesn't surprise him anymore. Thinking about Mikorin doesn't surprise him anymore. And so he thinks of him.

Mikorin sat on the bench alone. The cold night air seeped through his skin but he doesn't move, he doesn't want to go back just yet. He was still reading Mayumayu's messages on his phone. The branches of the trees quivered and he notices a change in the weather. It was going to rain. He looks up at the sky and sees that there are no stars. He sighs and stands up to go.

"I like you.."

He thought he heard Mayu say. He turned around and saw no one. He gazed down and wished to forget about what happened between the two of them.

Mikorin became wary of coming by Nozaki's apartment because of the fear of bumping into Mayu. Luckily for him, for the past weeks, he never crossed paths with the youngster. He says he's happy but he was worried about him. Moreover, he never replied to Mayumayu and its been weeks since they both texted each other, the last message that he received from him was "I want to see you". He wanted to see him too but he was afraid. He momentarily forgets about Mayumayu and concentrates on his work. He was going to spend the night at Nozaki's to finish a draft. After an hour he excuses himself and goes out to buy at a convenience store. Nozaki offers if he would want him to come with him. Mikorin says its alright and goes on his way.

Mayu has been weary and Nozaki as his elder brother was worried about him. He noticed that there were slight changes with his brother and he couldn't help but feel uneasy about it. He has asked him a lot of times about this and Mayu, for the first time doesn't really give him a decent reply. This was something new because Mayu always opened up to him about everything. This sudden secretiveness made him feel lonely and left out. Something must have happened.

The roads were deserted. The only thing that accompanied Mikorin was the pitter patter of his footsteps against the ground. His phone vibrates on his pocket and he was surprised when he saw who was calling. It says Mayumayu on the screen. His heart leapt out of his chest and he was about to trip on air when he say her name on his cellphone screen. He couldn't help but almost drop his phone when he saw her name. He was having palpitations that it was difficult for him to continue standing up so he fumbles with his footsteps and leans on a post. He breathed in and out. He was trying to calm himself. When he was able to collect himself he looked at his phone again and sees that Mayumayu stopped the call. He was relieved. That really caught him off guard, he wasn't expecting Mayumayu to call him. When he returned at Nozaki's house carrying his bags (he bought a lot of food) he was surprised that Nozaki was doing something weird. His face was glum and he looked like he was in the verge of despair.

"What are you doing Nozaki?"

"I wanted to call Mayu because I have an urgent matter to attend to but my phone's dead. Mikoshiba, let me borrow your phone."

"Ha?" Mikorin said in disbelief. This was the worst thing that could happen.

"Please.. this is really important."

"I don't want to." Mikorin said dismissively. But even though he firmly says he doesn't want to, in the end, he always ends up getting tricked into agreeing. He gives his phone to Nozaki. And the latter types something on the phone and puts Mikorin's phone in his ear and walks away where Mikorin won't be able to hear him. It took Nozaki a while before he returned Mikorin's phone.

"Thanks Mikoshiba."

Mikorin clicked his tongue and was browsing on his phone, he was curious about Nozaki and Mayu's conversation. When he checked his inbox there was no incoming messages so he checked his call register. When he browsed the outgoing and incoming calls he was confused why there were two calls under Mayumayu's name. One outgoing and one incoming. Mikorin was confused.

"Mikoshiba, Mayu's going to spend the night here."

"Huh? Why?"

Nozaki narrowed his eyes.

"No.. It's not that I don't want him to be here idiot. But isn't it late already?"

"Not really he was spending time with his friend actually, probably for the tournament."

"BUT IT'S LATE ALREADY."

"It doesn't matter. He's going to be here any minute now. Let's make this work the three of us."

"What's he going to do? Your brother is lazy as fuck."

"Don't underestimate my brother Mikoshiba. He can do anything he puts his mind into. And he promised me on this one. So he has no choice."

Mikorin was exasperated. He didn't know what to do. Nozaki was too oblivious of the whole situation that it pissed him off.

"Give me all the parts that I have to draw. I'll go home."

"Mikoshiba, we have a lot to draw. And you only have 6 hours to go before the trains stop."

"I can do it in that time."

"Impossible. You would.."

There was a knock on the door which made Nozaki's statement trail off.

"He's here!" Nozaki beamed. Mikorin on the other hand was so irritated. He was red as tomato and was on the verge of melting right then and there. He did not expect this development. And completely forgot about the incoming and the outgoing calls under Mayumayu's name.

Mayu was wearing his gym clothes. His sports bag was heft up on his shoulder and his pants were shaggy. He looked so different than how he usually dresses, not that Mikorin sees him in anything other than his gakuran or casual clothes. But he looked dorky with his sweatshirt on. When the younger man entered the room, he was surprised that Mikorin was there as well. But he didn't give it away, he just averted his eyes from the redhead and took off his shoes. His brother was awkwardly in a good mood and it made him a little uncomfortable. The atmosphere inside the room changed, but his elder brother was as oblivious as ever.

They were working on the manuscript nonstop. Mayu was helping his brother ink some parts and Mikorin of course, drawing the flowers. Nozaki laments about not inviting Hori-senpai and Wakamatsu so that their work would be faster. Mikorin on the other hand was pale and was sweating really hard just by the fact that he was inside a room with Mayu. Even though he was concentrating on trying to finish his part so that he could catch the last train, his hands wouldn't move faster. He was on the verge of tears. And Mayu notices it. The younger man tries so hard not to speak to him and ask him if he was alright. He was worried about Mikorin and he hates what their relationship has become.

After 4 hours of working non stop. All of them were exhausted but the work was far from finished. Mikorin was exhausted and his hand throbbed. Mayu on the other hand was as calm as ever. Mikorin was even surprised that he could keep up with them. Nozaki excuses himself and tells them that he's going to make something for them to eat. Both of them were left alone. Silence. Awkward silence was oppressing the both of them. None of them spoke. Until Mayu broke the ice.

"Mikoto-san." The younger man whispers. The way he uttered Mikorin's name sent shivers down the redheads spine. He moved a bit farther from Mayu.

"I'm sorry. But please, seriously think about what I told you."

Mikorin blushed scarlet up to his ears. He was trying so hard not to think about Mayu's confession.

"And.."

"Please.." Mikorin said pleading.

"I.." Mikorin was confused. Really really confused that out of instinct he switched his phone and clicked random things in an attempt to ignore Mayu. But instead, he accidentally pressed the call button on his incoming calls and called mayumayu. Mayu's phone rang. That made Mikorin come back to his senses. He was dumbfounded. He couldn't believe his eyes. He was supposedly calling mayumayu, but why is Mayu's phone ringing? Is it just mere coincidence? He clicked the cancel button and the ringing stopped.

"What was that all about?" Mikorin said his voice trembling.

He clicked the call button and then Mayu's phone rang again.

"Mikoto-san? What's wrong?"

"You...!" Mikorin stood up and pointed a finger at him. The redhead looked at him eyes wide and without batting an eyelid. He looked exhausted and shocked.

"I've been trying to tell you all this time."

"But... but.."

"I am mayumayu."

"Eh?" Mikorin was practically screaming already.

"What's wrong Mikoshiba?" Nozaki commented. His voice worried.

"N.. Nothing." Mikorin stuttered. The red head broke down to his knees. He couldn't believe what he just learned. Mayu can't be mayumayu. His head throbbed and then just like that he lay there like a corpse. His soul leaving his body.