Naruto's 10th Return: A Confrontation and the Devil's Favorite Demon!
By: DMEXNadda is mine, ya feel me, playa?
-Parking Lot-
A public bus pulls up. The door opens and the crowd cheers wildly as Team 7, Edge (dressed in Iruka's gear), Konohamaru, Ino (she snuck on), and Hinata Hyuga with her baby in arms come out of the bus. Naruto takes off his orange jumpsuit jacket, and he has a shirt that says: BOOTS 2 ROCK'S ASS on front and the back says: I BRING IT AND THE ROCK DOESN'T!
NAURTO'S 10TH RETURN: A CONFRONTATION AND THE DEVIL'S FAVORITE DEMON!
-Green Room-
Sasuke has his iPod on and for some reason, Eve seems to put her hand on his lap
Eve: Hi, Sasuke. You are quite a young man.
Sasuke: And your point is…?
Eve: I was in the arena when you won your first ACW Intercontinental Champion.
Sasuke (sarcastically): You want a medal for that?
Eve: OOH!
* (angry): OH HELL NO! SASUKE IS MINE!
Sakura grabs Eve by the hair
Sakura (angry): WHO THE (BUZZER) DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU BITCH!
Ino pulls Sakura's arm
Ino (angry): DON'T EVEN GO THERE SAKURA! SASUKE IS MINE! EVE, YOU SLUT: STAY AWAY FROM SASUKE! HE'S MINE!
Eve (angry): WHO YOU CALLIN A SLUT?!
Ino (angrier): YOU! WHORE!
Eve (angrier): WHY YOU-
Sakura (angrier): WHY DON'T YOU GO BACK TO JERSEY SHORE WITH THAT OBNOXIOUS MIKE SITUATION!
Eve (angrier): LISTEN YOU-
*: EXCUSE ME!
(loud record scratch sound)
Vickie comes by and puts her arm around Sasuke
Vickie (sexually aroused): Well, excuse me!
Demon Sakura (pissed off): OH NO SHE DIDN'T! I'LL KILL HER TO DEATH!
Ino (pissed off): HELL NO! VICKIE YOU (OWL HOOT) DON'T YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!
Eve, Ino, Sakura and Vickie start beating each other up. AJ is watching with a strange smile on her face. Sasuke puts on Duality by Slipknot on blaring loudly on his iPod to drown out the fighting An old school fight cloud is seen as they continue to beat each other up. Finally-
Sasuke (angry): SHUT UP!
fighting stops. Sasuke takes his headphones off and glares at them
Sasuke: Front and center!
(they do as told fearing they make Sasuke even more upset)
Sasuke: I'm going to be a blunt and clear as possible! Eve, I'm not interested in Street Workers! Sakura and Ino, you're both immature little brats who fight like horny school girls. Vickie, you're old enough to be my mother. BACK OFF! AJ, if you ever have that thought bubble again, I'll kill you to death! GOT IT?!
(they cringe and shake their head yes)
Sasuke: Good! Now all of you… GET! OUT! OF! MY! SIGHT!
DOOR SLAMS ON THEM
Eve: I am not a hooker!
Vickie: I'll never look at him the same way again…
Ino: Who does he think he is?
Sakura: Give up! Sasuke is mine, you pig!
-Dark Room-
Kane is stewing in his own anger for some reason and then glares at Naruto…
Kane: CAN I HELP YOU!?
Naruto: You do realize that fire is engulfing you?
Kane: I KNOW THAT! I'M A MONSTER! WHAT DO YOU EXPECT?!
Konohamaru: He scares me.
Edge: Try not look at him.
AJ: Kane and Naruto. You're match is next. You'll be in a mixed tag match tonight.
Naruto: Who's my partner?
AJ: That's for me to know and for you to find out.
Naruto: You wouldn't put me in there with that evil babysitter Icky Vickie would ya?
AJ: No. Unless you want me to.
Naruto (like Chris Rock): OH HEEEELLL NO!
Kane: WHO AM I TAGGING WITH?
AJ: Eve.
Kane: (growls angrily)JUST SO YOU KNOW, I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT HAPPENS TO HER TONIGHT!
(Kane storms out)
Naurto: I am so screwed…
Edge: Why can't Hinata do it?
Naruto: Because she's taking care of the baby.
-RAW ZONE-
Cole: Oh, boy… I don't like where this is going.
King: Me neither.
Cole: Eve and Kane (go figure this one out) will be in mixed tag action against that damn Naruto and a mystery partner.
King: So who could Naruto's partner be?
Cole: Personally, I don't give a crap, because he's gonna get hurt.
Kakashi: $100.00 says you're wrong.
King: Double or nothing.
Cole: Okay I'm in!
Kakashi: Prepare to eat your own words.
(Opening bell)
Justin Roberts: This mixed tag team match is set for one fall.
SHE LOOKS GOOD TO ME-
Crowd roars into boos as Eve comes out with a nasty smile on her face
Justin Roberts: Introducing first, from Denver, Colorado; Eve Torres.
(Ino joins the broadcast booth)
Kakashi: Ino? What are you doing here?
Ino: I wanna see that bitch Eve get hurt!
Eve yells something at Ino
Ino (angry, towards Eve): KEEP DREAMING YOU (CAR HORN)! SASUKE'S MINE!
Cole: Hey, watch it! This is family show!
Ino: Shut up Cole!
(Fire explosion comes out of no where)
Veil of Fire 2012 blares in the arena as Kane gets a mixed reaction
Justin Roberts: And her partner, weighing 326 lbs, KANE!
Ino: Hey Kane! Tombstone that bitch for me!
(Eve yells at her again. Fire explosion in the ring scares them making them stop)
King: I hate it when he does that.
(Kane takes his executioner mask off)
The arena goes dark as the psychedelic butterfly appears on the Titantron. WIND by Akeboshi blares as the crowd erupts as if Jeff Hardy was coming to the ring
Cultivate your hunger before you your anger to make them all the mountain, never coming into the contents, never falling down.
My knee is still shaking, like I was twelve,Sneaking out of the classroom, by the back door.A man railed at me twice though, but I didn't is wasting for people like me.
Justin Roberts: And their opponents, first from The Village Hidden in the Leaves, he is "THE OUTLAW NINJA COMMANDER" NAAAAAAAAAAARRUUUUTTOOOO UUUUZZZUUUMAAAKKIII!
Ino: A new low even for Naruto.
Cole: I agree.
King: Shut up, both of you.
Kakashi: Thank you.
Don't try to live so 't cry 'cause you're so 't dry with fakes or fears,'Cause you will hate yourself in the end.
Don't try to live so 't cry 'cause you're so 't dry with fakes or fears,'Cause you will hate yourself in the end.
HEHAHAHEHEHAHA! OH!
Cole & King: WHAT?!
Cole: YOU GOTTA BE FREAKIN' KIDDING ME!
The crowd gets even more pumped as-
Justin Roberts: And his tag team partner, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada; TRIIIIIIISSH STRATUS!
Cole: WHAT A BOMBSHELL!
Kakashi: Hope you got that check ready…
(opening match bell dings. Oddly enough, Eve blind tags Kane…)
Cole: Eve just blind tagged Kane.
Ino: Eve you're such a weenie!
Kane has a red anger mark on his head
Kakashi: Something tells me she's going to regret that…
Naruto (wipes the sweat off his face, thinking): Phew… I owe her.
Trish: AHEM!
Naruto happily tags Trish Stratus in. Trish goes in. Meanwhile Kane for some odd reason punches Cole in the face and grabs the mic off the table. Eve goes in expecting to kick Trish's ass, but-
(KANE BEARHUGS EVE)
Eve: (screams in pain)
Kane (angry): YOU TAGGING ME IN BLINDLY CAUSED AN ANGER AND DESPAIR MARK ON MY HEAD. LOOK AT IT!
(Anime close up of Kane's face and red anger mark. Ino and Sakura scream in background)
Eve (pained): YOU'RE *GAG* HURTING *KOFF!* ME!
Kane (depressed): ALL I WANTED WAS TO BEAT NARUTO WITHIN AN INCH OF HIS LIFE…
King: I don't like where this is going…
Ino: I do! Make her eyes pop out!
Kane (angry): BUT YOU BLIND TAGGED ME LIKE I WAS THE BASTARD, SO I MAY AS WELL BE! THE! BASTARD!
Naruto and Trish sweat drop
Naruto (thinking): Better her than me…
Trish: AHEM!
Kane (angrier): IS YOUR BRAIN RETARDED?! I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF TORTURING MY TAG TEAM PARTNER!
Kane is 1000 feet tall and his yelling looks like a big wind storm and Trish is 8 inches tall
Trish (puts her hands on her hips and taps her foot): Mind putting her down? I wanna finish her.
Kane: (growls angrily)
Puts her down. Trish Chick Kick's her and gets a 3 count
Justin Roberts: The winner of this match-
Cole: OH THAT IS BULL-
Justin Roberts: Naruto and Trish Stratus.
Cole (angry): THAT IS BULL(ELEPHANT TRUNPET)!
Kakashi: Told you, pay up!
King: Me too. You lost the bet!
AJ skips down the aisle as Cole angrily signs the check for Kakashi and King
AJ: Do it.
Kane glares at AJ with a long lost look.
AJ (holds his hand): For me? Please?
Ino: What the hell?
Kakashi: I knew it… Naruto has some new followers…
Naruto (quietly to Trish): What is she doing?
Trish (quietly to Naruto): Sparing your ass. Be grateful.
(KANE CHOKESLAMS EVE TO HELL! Crowd cheers)
Cole: HE CAN'T DO THAT!
King: OH YES HE CAN!
Kane: NARUTO, ME, AJ AND HER ARE JOINING YOUR GROUP. BUT ONE DAY, I'LL KILL YOU TO DEATH AND TSUNADE WILL WATCH AS I EAT YOU ALL ALIVE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !
Naruto: Good luck with that.
Ino peed her pants in horror
END?!
-NEXT TIME-
Naruto: Man this Damien Sandow is some piece of work. Who the hell would want to be educated by this jerk. He's worse than Sasuke!
Sandow: For the better of the WWE I'll educate this ignoramus!
Naruto: SCREW YOU!
NEXT TIME: Naruto's 11th Return: Education at it's Worst