Dedicated to Steph

So you're probably wondering why I'm telling you this story.

I mean, I know Mai and Azula are my best friends forever, and that Aang, Katara, Toph, and Sokka are supposed to be my enemies (I'm still totally going out with Sokka though. He's so delish!), but seriously. A girl's gotta have some fun, and Zuko is so stalk-worthy ('cause stalking you best friend(ish)'s paranoid brother totally equals a good time).

After following him around the halls of our school, Avatar High (such a weird name), I noticed something.

Zuko has no love life.

Well, I'm sure you already knew that (again, paranoid), but he has, like, a kajillion fangirls, and he's still never had a girlfriend.

I think he's asexual.

And that was when I came up with the best idea ever: I, Ty Lee, was going to set Avatar High's most eligible bachelor up.

But, as with most plans, I faced a problem. What girl could possibly stand Zuko for a long amount of time? As I was pondering this, she walked by. Katara. She's in my grade (junior), president of the drama club, and one of the captains of the volleyball team. In short, the perfect girl (for him, duh!).

So, anyway.

Reasons why Katara and Zuko are perfect for each other:

1. He hates her. She hates him. It's adorable. I should just go ahead and write a novel about them.

2. They're total opposites. Like night and day, yin and yang, cold and hot, water and fire--you get my point. Besides, opposites attract!

3. Zuko is always in a bad mood and Katara is calm and collected (though she can have a rather nasty temper). Ergo, Katara can help him to not be such a prick.

4. They bicker like a married couple when their partnered up for a class project. Seriously.

5. They're just so CUTE together!! Katara's really tan with long, wavy brown hair, blue eyes, and is about 5'5". Zuko looks like he's never seen the sun has almost black hair, really cool gold eyes. So, don't deny it.

So without further ado, commence operation Set-up-Zuko-with-Katara-so-that-they-fall-in-love-and-eventually-have-cute-babies-and-I-can-be-their-auntie.

I have got to think of a shorter name.

Crimson Markers and Red Tattoos

The first thing you need to know about me is that I'm not as girly as I seem. Sure, I love fashion, boys, pink, boys, shopping, boys, flirting with boys, but not many people know that I love martial arts (I'm a master in kyusho-jitsu. Chyeah! I'll take you on!), plan to join the circus, and listen to Cobra Starship like it's a religion.

And as bubbly and ditzy as I seem, I'm actually very detail-oriented--probably even more so than Azula. That's most likely the reason why I sensed the potential (I don't using the term "sexual tension," but umm...yeah) between Katara and Zuko back when we were in pre-K.

I mean, there's a reason why she was the only one he let borrow his red (oh, sorry, crimson) marker! He also had this lovely shade of fuchsia (which is a shade of pink) and he wouldn't even let me look at it, much less use his crimson marker! Tch, he couldn't even say "crimson" when we were four.

Anyway, so much could have happened between them, but then Katara had to go on ahead and accidentally spill blue paint all over Zuko, and Zuko just had to put gum in her hair for revenge.

Oh well.

So now it's up to me to rekindle the flames of their love!

When we were in sixth grade, I remember Katara telling Suki she wanted a tattoo. In eighth grade, she put a temporary tattoo of a red dragon on her arm. Sokka went ballistic 'cause Katara had somehow tricked him into thinking it was permanent (his reaction was so cute!). I think she got over "I'm-going-to-get-a-smexy-tattoo-on-a-censored-part-of-my-body" phase (you'd never think she was that kind of person...) back in freshman year. Last week in the hall, though, I heard her telling Yue she loves guys with tattoos. Sokka heard and went ballistic (again). It was so cute!

Hence the reason why I'm standing outside Zuko's room in a black ninja outfit with a matching mask at 1:45 in the morning, holding a damp cloth and a tattoo of a red-dragon.

You know, they should really thank me for doing all this for them. For the love of leaping frog-monkeys, I'm risking my life, my pride, and my new black leather boots to get these two idiots to realize they're in love! I can't be the only one who notices the secret glances in class...

And before you go thinking I broke into his house, I totally did not (but that would've been awesome!). Azula had a sleep over. Speaking of Azula, this guy named Jet totally likes her. I'm so doing them after I'm done with Zuko and Katara. Can you feel the love tonight...?

Which leads me to picking Zuko's lock, 'cause that kid is so freaking paranoid and locks his freaking door! Although, he lives with Azula, so I really can't blame him.

Sweet. It clicked. Apparently, Zuko's a really light sleeper. but that's okay, 'cause I'm an even lighter stepper.

Phase One, complete.

It's not in my nature to pessimistic or angry, but have you ever had the feeling where you just KNOW that thinks are going to get even worse than they already are? The one where you know that all hope just waltzed out the door because God/Karma/Fate/Whatever thinks it would be totally hilarious to see you get into deeper and deeper shit?

Yeah, 'cause I think I'm feeling it now.

See, after Zuko found the red dragon on his arm he went all psycho and started looking for me (how does he know it's me anyway?! What, am I that obvious?), and Phase Two is an utter disaster because Aang is on the roof.

Just to make things clear, I wrote letters. Not just any letters. Love letters. Basically, they just said to meet on the roof at noon.

So now, it's noon, I'm hiding behind a chimney-thing on the roof, and Katara is standing there waiting for her secret admirer and Aang is in the way!

In case you didn't know, Aang is a frosh who has, like, the biggest crush on Katara. He's staring at her now. Son of a platypus-bear. Interfering with my plans.

"H-hey there Katara! Whatcha doin' way up here?"

This is soo messing up my aura!

"Ehh...I'm meeting someone here."

Damn straight she's meeting someone, so back off you glabrous freshman!"

"Oh! I see you're holding a letter! May I see it?"

NO YOU MAY NOT!

Apparently Katara has the same idea, but nooo, Aang just has to be a little bugger and take it from her. And if that isn't enough, he decides he just HAS to read it out loud!

"Dear Katara. I want to say thank you. First of all, I want to say thank you to your parents who raised you to be so lovely. To your father and mother I say thank you so much. Sincerely, the Blue Spirit."

I know, I know! It sounds nothing like something Zuko would say, but I was watching "School Rumble" yesterday, and I was inspired. Besides, Zuko and Harima Kenji are somewhat alike.

"Guahahaha! This is hilarious! What's this guy going to do if he's laughed at?! Too bad there's no real name."

Oh. Em. Gee. He dare have the audacity to laugh at my--I mean Zuko's--letter? Oooh, you are so going down, baldie.

Katara snatched the letter back. "You think so? I think this person put forth their best effort to convey their feelings. I truly think this letter was written with love. I like it."

Success!

Aang looked at Katara and got down on one knee. My fingers are twitching.

"The truth is," he took her hands in his, "the one who wrote it was me. I love you."

Hit my head with a stick and throw me off the roof.

"Oh, Aang. I'm so sorry, but I have someone I like already." And being the nice person that she is, she kissed him on the forehead and left.

Poor kid. He looked heartbroken. And maybe if my aura was still pink, I would have comforted him. But it's the color of sulfur (translation: angry), so too bad.

"Hey, twerp!"

Aang looked up, relieved seeing one of the "nicer" upperclassmen. Tch.

Yeah, baby, you are so gonna get it, you--

Damn.

And enter Mr. I-have-a-pole-shoved-up-my-arse-Zuko. Ohmygosh! That sounds like one of those little plushie toys that that talk, like Tickle-me-Elmo!

Tickle-me-Zuko?

Umm...bad images.

Oh, he's seen me. Looks pretty mad too. (I think I can see a vein popping out of his forehead. Gross, but kinda cool.)

"You."

Now would be a good time to start running, yes?

Why does life majorly blow??

I mean, this sucks.

Well, I'm still pretty much alive, so I guess it isn't too bad.

After Zuko ran me down (yeah, he literally ran me down. And then we crashed into a gaggle of sophomores.), he basically bellowed at me ('cause Zuko doesn't just yell, he bellows) so the whole entire school could hear about his existential woes, and sent me to the principal's office.

I know, lame, right?

So I had to sit in front of my guidance counselor, Iroh (coincidentally, Zuko's uncle) for like an hour and listening to him talk about ships and lotus's and proverbs, and junk.

Don't get me wrong, I love Uncle Iroh! I mean, the guy used to change my diapers when my parents would drop me off at Azula's when I was little. And he serves the best tea. But--

He forbade me to meddle in other people's love lives.

Ergo (I love that word), I am mad at him.

And now, I'm in art and just looking at those two (meaning, Zuko and Katara) is just making me MAD.

Calm down Ty Lee. Gotta bring the pink back!! Because pink will always be pink. I'm sick and tired of people saying things like "Black is the new pink," or whatever, because, HELLOO??? Does black seriously look like pink to you people?? And if my aura ever turned black (which it will never, EVER, do) it will signify long-term unforgiveness, and health problems that may lead to death, which is, like, the exact opposite of pink, which means love and spirituality!

"Hey, Zuko, can I use your red marker?"

OMG. Oh. Em. Gee. OHMYGOD!!

Katara's talking to him!

"It's crimson."

"No, it says red, right here." She points to some random area on the marker, but that doesn't matter, 'cause their fingers are touching! I mean, they're practically holding hands!

Zuko frowned. Meaning he didn't scowl/glare.

"Whatever."

"So can I use it or not?"

"Sure."

"Hey Zuko, you didn't let Song use your marker!" I yell out. (Song is a major fangirl of his.)

He glares (why do I always get the glaring Zuko?). I smile and flash him the v-sign.

Zuko notices Katara staring at the tattoo on his arm (no need to thank me, or anything).

"What?"

Katara blushes (awww!). "Nothing, I just like your tattoo. I used to have one just like it when I was younger. Sokka made me take it off though. So stingy."

"Hey, I heard that!" comes from somewhere across the class. Isn't he just so cute?!

Zuko colors (no, he doesn't blush, 'cause he's too manly for that. And, I'm not just being sarcastic, either. He told me that when we were four. So, yes, he was always a masochistic prick.)

"Ty Lee, don't even think about touching that fuchsia marker."

Meanie.

But, there's hope.

My plan may have not worked the way I wanted it to, and Zuko may never let me borrow his fuchsia marker, but that soft look he's giving Katara now (that I seriously have never seen before. On him, anyway.) while helping her with her painting...I'm totally going to lock those two in a closet next.

I'm so so sorry for the long wait! SOMEone (yeah, you) took forever on editing, so I got it back last night. And then, some idiot put in too many plugs for his Christmas lights, thus leading to a black out in my neighborhood. Kinda funny though... I'm sorry if anything looks confusing or weird on this. I just recently got a MacBook, and they don't let you edit or anything! I can't even change my profile. Anyway, Azula dares you review! And I DON'T use the word "delish" to describe people in real life. Ew.

Oh, and since I write fan fiction, I clearly own Avatar.

I don't own School Rumble either!