Here's my contribution to Love in Panem's A Candle for the Caribbean Charity. It was my first time contributing so this might be a little rusty.
Hope you enjoy reading this and you can head over to Love in Panem on tumblr to read some more stories! :D
I'm flipping channels in the living room when I hear thundering footsteps coming downstairs.
"KATNISS! KATNISS! KATNISS!"
I sigh. Can't I just get one moment to myself in this house? Don't get me wrong I love spending time with my little sister, but could I just be a normal twenty-four year old college student that wastes the day watching meaningless television and eating pizza like there's no tomorrow?
I don't glance her way as I respond in a bored voice, "What is it, Prim?"
She huffs at my lack of enthusiasm but continues, "Well, do you remember how last month that sleazy boss down at District 12 Gym conned my money from my bank account? I reported that ass face, by the way, and I was browsing my news feed on facebook and found this other gym that's five minutes away from here...are you even listening to me, Katniss?" She trails off when she sees my attention solely on a news report about the devastating hurricane season this year.
"Did you see the damage Hurricane Maria did to Puerto Rico?"
"You know what, my friend got a tattoo of the shape of Puerto Rico because of that. He said it was to symbolize his heritage and-wait a minute, quit distracting me, Katniss!" The way she stomps her foot like she did when she was a little girl when she didn't get her way brings a bubble of laughter out of me.
Tired of my antics, she snatches the remote from my hands and clicks the power button. She puts her hands on her hips and glowers at me.
"If you don't listen to me, I'll tell Gale it was you that put purple dye in his shampoo bottle last week." She threatens me. That wipes the smile clear off my face.
Remembering Gale's towering form and deeper than usual voice when he threatened everyone he knew simply by saying "payback's a bitch" scared the shit out of me. Who knew the guy cared so much for his hair? Obviously not me.
It actually wasn't supposed to happen at all. I only gave in to prove to Gale I was funny when he proclaimed I wasn't. I didn't expect his reaction to be so….intense, so I've kept my mouth shut. And stayed farrrr away from him.
I frown at her grinning in triumph at her tactic to shut me up, then she jumps on the couch next to me. "So, as I was saying, I found a gym that's not too far and is one of the best around town and I want you and me to join."
I give her a look that tells her exactly how I feel about that suggestion.
"Oh, come on, Katniss. Please?" Prim whines. "They have a pool there that's only available if you have a membership and I know you love to swim? They also have yoga classes and I'll even pay for you. Pretty please, Katniss? It'll make me happy?" She pulls a puppy dog look and I'm sold.
I flash back to the happy Prim before we lost our parents to a car accident years ago. I used to nickname her loony-Prim for the fact that she was always lost in her own world, never knowing what exactly was going on. After the accident, she changed. Her eyes were clearer but the blue grew dimmer. She wouldn't smile for months and cried herself to sleep every night. It was hard to watch her spirit die little by little. It took a while, but we managed to find a semblance of normalcy.
I'll suffer through anything that will bring her happiness, no matter what.
"Ugh, fine! I'll do it." Prim leans over and hugs me. "But I'm not doing it for you, it's for the all-access pool." We both know I'm lying through my teeth but she doesn't call me out on it.
"How did you find out about my prank on Gale?"
…..
In between my classes and Prim's job as a Physical Therapy Technician, she drags me to Capitol Gym and signs us up.
The old man behind the desk named Haymitch, the owner of the gym, guides us through every area in his gym by pointing and naming the machines and takes our picture despite my protests.
He leaned down to my level and smiled mockingly, "Gym policy, sweetheart."
Prim puts down my hand that only had one finger up just before the camera flashes.
Soon after, we're handed our cards and leave, to my relief.
On our walk home, Prim sighs dejectedly beside me, dropping her phone by her side.
"What is it?"
She stops walking. She lets out a deep sigh before the tears began running down her rosy cheeks. I instantly grab her shoulders, periodically wiping her tears away. "It's been two years, Katniss. Two whole years where I've been submitting essays, interviewing at schools, and getting rejected by emails," she lifts her arm that holds her phone in the air which explains her sudden mood change, "to be something I don't think will happen to me. I think I should give up Kinesiology and go for something simpler."
Being the last of her friends still waiting for an acceptance to any of the schools she applied for has left Prim convinced she should settle for an easier job. It's been a few months since this last happened. Despondent Prim is making a reappearance and I refuse for her to revert back to that person again. I smile gently at her, "That's not the Primrose Everdeen I know."
"It is now." She responds stubbornly, sniffing and staring at her shoes.
I bend down catching her gaze that's determined not to stray from the pavement. "Prim, look at me." I command softly. I say the first thing that comes to mind, "Quit."
Stunned for a second, Prim opens and closes her mouth like a fish. "Huh?"
"If you're so unhappy then I say quit."
She stutters, "I-I-I can't just quit. Isn't it your job to tell me I'm wrong?"
I shrug my shoulders.
She rolls her eyes in annoyance, "You're supposed to say 'No, Prim. You have to keep wasting your time and try harder to become the greatest doctor in the world.'" She made her voice lower and gravelly to imitate me.
Shoving her shoulder playfully, I interlock our arms and steer us towards the apartment. "First of all, that's not how I sound. Secondly, seems to me you still want to do PT."
Prim is silent which I take as answer enough. "It's been a dream of yours for you to get into PT school, Prim. It takes a combination of hard work, dedication and most of all patience to make your dreams come true. You did everything you could do. There's still one more school left to consider you," I remind her. Stopping at the walkway leading up to the front door, we turn and face each other. "And if those ass hats can't clearly see your potential, then TO HELL WITH THEM!"
We hug each other. Prim laughing and crying at the same time in my arms.
I whisper in her ear, "Momma and Papa would be proud of you, Primmy. I sure as hell am."
"I love you, Katniss."
I swallow past the lump in my throat and croak out, "I love you, too."
….
My first month at Capitol Gym wasn't so bad.
Accompanying my sister to one of the yoga classes the gym offers is torture as I've never done it before. Prim's heartfelt apology the next day as I'm layed out on the couch with sore muscles doesn't manage to prevent me from scowling at her and wishing I had my bow.
Slowly recovering from my failed day one at Capitol Gym, I aim for doing something I actually enjoy.
I was only half lying to Prim when I told her I could take advantage of the pool Capitol offers. I used to pop in Gale's backyard pool, however having three rambunctious four-year-olds splashing and yelling "someone peed in the water" tends to ruin the mood.
It isn't half bad here. Tanning, swimming leisurely without interruption and the music is halfway decent. Sucks I only have a few weeks left before I'll have to switch my bathing suit out for a winter coat.
Prim tries to plan a workout routine for us. I deal in pool time during the day, then treadmill or bike pedal for 25 minutes. That's enough cardio I've ever done in my life.
After a week of commitment to my deal, I reward myself with a small chocolate cake for my efforts, hiding it in the back of the fridge and sneaking bites when I suspect Prim isn't in the apartment.
On my last slice, I get distracted admiring the chocolatey goodness for a second, then raise the fork to my lips when all of a sudden the door opens with a bang.
"KITTY IS EATING CAKE. I WANT SOME!"
Dammit.
And there's my disappointed sister with my best friend, his wife and kids in tow.
Well, I'm in trouble.
…..
For a gym that's quoted "the best in Panem" you would think they'd have more employees on the night shift.
I've been graced by the presence of an alcoholic manager and a spiky-haired brunette with a resting bitch face in all the time I've come at night. I wonder if Haymitch is too lazy to hire anyone lest it means he has to get out of his office and actually work for a living.
It comes as a surprise when I scan my card one night and hear a warm greeting on my right from behind the desk than the usual silence I'd expected.
He's not much taller than my 5' 4, maybe two or three more inches with blond waves that I'm itching to run my fingers through. He has a medium build with muscles not too bulging but enough to show he can easily lift a hundred pound bag of flour.
Dazed by the way his cerulean eyes hypnotize me, I shake my head and force myself to talk before he wonders why I've been staring at him longer than I should. "What did you say?"
He smirks before repeating, "I said hi, how are you?"
"Oh. Um, good. Great."
He nods. "That's good."
For some reason, I stay there, not even attempting to leave.
My brain finally catches up to my body and I put one foot in front of the other to go through the turnstile, but it won't budge.
Realizing what I'm doing wrong he offers, "Oh! You have to wave your card in the scanner again."
I hear the click and it lets me blessedly pass. In my hurry to leave I don't even say thank you. Running into the women's locker room, I sit down on the bench with my head in my hands.
What the hell was that?
Why didn't I jump over the stupid turnstile?
I groan and press my eyes against my hands until I see spots.
Spending a few minutes to cool down and compose myself, I muster the courage to walk out there with my head held high.
I make a last minute decision to turn left to enter the 'women only' room instead of heading straight for my usual machine that rewards me with a clear view of him.
"So much for that." I mutter to myself.
….
Prim steps into my bedroom just as I'm exiting my bathroom.
She tilts her head to the side and asks, "Since when do you wear makeup? Wait, why would you wear makeup to the gym?"
I stumble in my explanation which doesn't help me convince her this wasn't planned, "Well, I was, I mean I couldn't...I forgot I had some on from school this morning. I realized it a minute ago."
Her smug smile makes more words come out to defend myself, "Oh my god, Prim. It's not a crime to wear eyeliner to a gym! There's that woman who wears a freakin' wig for god's sake and you're criticizing me for wearing something simple?"
When she says nothing, still staring at me with gleam in her eyes I stride out of my room, shouting over my shoulder, "Are you coming or what?!"
I never shared what happened at my last gym visit to Prim but I suspect she knows. It's pretty much confirmed as we both enter and she sees him tapping away on the computer. She glances my way and raises her eyebrows subtly. Putting on my best glare I aim it at her and hope she keeps her mouth shut.
Prim, undeterred, ignores my pleas. "Hi, Peeta!"
He stops what he's doing and addresses my little sister, "Hey, Prim. How are you tonight?"
Since when are they friends? And is she flirting?
Grabbing her wrist thereby cutting off their brief conversation, I drag Prim somewhere private and away from prying ears. Fuming and at a loss for words, I simply stare at her. It doesn't matter if I had spoken anyway because Prim is too busy bent over laughing.
"Are you done?"
"Haha! That was so funny. Wasn't it?" She shoves me playfully. "No wonder you've been coming here more often than usual. And making an effort to beautify yourself when last you tried doing that, you couldn't even apply mascara without poking your eye."
As Prim drones on about my horrible attempt at figuring out how to apply mascara to my eyelashes, it registers in my mind that I failed to realize she gave me his name in my jealous state.
Peeta. His name is Peeta.
It fits him.
Prim and I separate to our own machines after she stops teasing me. This is the first time I'll be in close proximity of Peeta after our first disastrous meeting. Well, on my part. He was there witnessing my downfall.
Kill me now.
Climbing the stairs I sit on the seat of the bike and flounder. The person who used the machine previously must have been short because the chair is too far forward to be comfortable to pedal. My attempts to push the chair back is futile. I wonder if the universe is giving me this chance to save myself and not make a bigger fool of myself.
"Need a little help?"
Nope. The universe hates me.
I jumped at the close proximity of his soothing voice behind me. "Please?" I ask breathlessly.
He disappears for a second through a short hallway behind the desk that leads to the 'employee only' door, opens it and walks to my spot and proceeds in fixing the machine to my liking.
Is it hot in here or is it him?
He runs his hand through his hair, his muscles contracting in a delicious way and aims a disarming smile my way.
Definitely him.
"There you go. All set."
"Thanks, Peeta."
If it's possible, his smile grows bigger.
"You know, it's weird. I've met mostly every person ever since I started working here and know their names, but I don't know yours?"
Taking the hint, I answer, "It's Katniss."
"Katniss. I like it." Peeta winks at me. I feel my knees grow weak for a second. I casually reach out and touch the counter in case I end up embarrassing myself yet again. "What do you do, Katniss?"
Hoping he doesn't find a girl who loves plants strange I admit, "I'm majoring in Botany at Panem U."
He leans against my machine, raising an eyebrow in interest. "Really? How did you get into that?"
That opens me up a little about my love for the outdoors.
I end up sharing things only Prim and occasionally Gale would know with Peeta. It would bother me, yet I feel a sort of calmness with him. Like I could reveal my deepest darkest secret and he wouldn't judge me for it.
What began as a simple chat suddenly turns into a twenty-minute conversation of where we're from, our hobbies, likes, and dislikes and such. It's Peeta who points it out and he apologizes profusely for wasting my time. "I'm sure you didn't want to talk to me for that long." He laughs, self-consciously rubbing his neck.
I could talk to you forever.
Ignoring what my mind wants to say I dismiss his apology, "No, it's okay. It was nice chatting with you. Definitely bother me again sometime."
Peeta smiles, his penetrating gaze causing me to look away or else I'll do something stupid like kiss him.
A clearing of a throat behind us knocks us back to reality. I find my baby sister standing near the stairs making no effort in hiding the rising grin on her face. "I'm ready to go, Katniss."
"Right. Well," Red splotches start to appear on Peeta's cheeks as he moves back to the 'employee only' door and disappears from view, "I'll see you guys later. Have a nice night."
We're struck silent by his abrupt departure until I whisper harshly to Prim, "Nice going. Could've waited five more minutes before barging in."
She rolls her eyes, ignoring me. "Let's go home Katniss so I can receive my proper scolding instead of this whispering nonsense."
….
The rest of the year was eventful.
Thanksgiving and Christmas with the Hawthorne's is always surprising.
During Thanksgiving dinner, Gale's wife Madge went into labor.
As she was screaming in pain and threatening Gale to "never ask me for sex ever again", the rest of us had to eat the food from the cafeteria to settle our growling stomachs. Once Madge popped her little girl out, we all welcomed the new baby to the world.
Christmas was equally exciting. Rory handed Prim a rectangular box with a bow on top. Inside was a beautiful bottle pendant necklace with a blue heart-shaped crystal inside the bottle. Rory then proceeded to bend down on one knee and spoke loudly for everyone in the room to hear, as if we weren't already watching. "Primrose Everdeen, would you be my girlfr- ow! Damn, woman. How can you tackle me to the ground when you only weigh 110 pounds?" Prim leans down and engages in a not so PG-13 kissing sesh with Rory that Gale and I quickly put an end to.
Prim had been patiently waiting for Rory to return her feelings for over a year now. I'm happy for her, even though I feel an empty space inside of me for reasons I can't comprehend.
A bottle of Smirnoff never failed to disappoint me when I'm at my lowest. That's how Gale found me outside on his patio, buzzed no less, nursing my third bottle. He sat down on the steps next to me, leaning back on his elbows and gazed up at the stars.
"What's up with you?" Gale asked me.
"What are you talking about? Nothing's going on."
Gale raised one eyebrow in surprise. "I know you, Katniss. You wouldn't be out here drinking alone if there wasn't something on your mind." He snapped his fingers. "I know! It's that guy down at that gym, right? Peeta?"
"Oh my god! Can we go one minute without speaking about him?" I slammed the bottle down against the bottom step, almost cracking it. Gale takes it away from me to prevent any casualties in my inebriated state.
"Oookay, so it is Peeta. What's going on there?"
Sighing, I focus on the flowers on the side of his house. "Man, does Rory have it bad for Prim or what?" I pointed at the recently planted Primroses.
Gale exhaled slowly, running a hand over his face, "We're still talking about this, Katniss."
"I was the person who dyed your hair."
"YOU WHAT?! No. No, I'm not playing your game. But I have to say payback's a bitch, Katniss, so be ready." He points a finger at me, then drops it. Any anger he had before is gone as he returns to a more somber tone. "You won't be able to con your way out of this conversation."
I mumble, "I know."
"Prim let me in on the source of your recent happiness. How you're different; you actually getting out of the house other than for school. Smiling more."
"Gale-"
"No, listen." He fell forward, hands crossed over his knees. His charcoal grey eyes meeting mine with determination, "You've both been dancing around each other -flirting and talking- these past few months. Maybe it's time to make a move. Just," he squeezed my shoulder, "ask him out next time you see him. From what Prim told me, he won't say no."
And on that note, he left me to my thoughts.
…...
In mid-January, using the helpful advice from my companions, I come to the decision to try convincing the hottest guy I've ever seen out on a date with a person who currently has ten dollars in her bank account.
Observing my form in the full wall length mirror inside the 'women's only' workout area, the loose strands falling around my face, red cheeks, perspiration running down my forehead, and my clothes clinging to my skin are all signs of how NOT to approach your crush. And I'm about to do just that.
Why did I not plan this out thoroughly?
Pushing past my insecurities, I muster the courage to at least go up the stairs that lead to the entrance, but what I see halts me from stepping any further.
A girl with long, flowing blond locks and boobs so huge I can see how busty they are from here stands near Peeta. Everywhere he steps, she follows like some sort of lovesick puppy. A thought crosses my mind if maybe all this time he had a girlfriend and that's why he hasn't approached me with a desire to be more.
The sight of her hand buried in his soft hair, her smile lighting up her whole face, is what drives me forward. I don't spare a glance at either of them as I sprint out to the cool, refreshing outdoors and run straight home.
I fight it but eventually the tears fall. I brush them away furiously.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Small footsteps pad toward my bed.
"Not now, Prim. Okay?"
She climbs into my bed silently and holds me.
…..
It's around three weeks later I set foot inside Capitol Gym, at Prim's insistence. If I had it my way, I wouldn't come back at all.
Prim finally heard back from the school she'd been eagerly waiting for since last August. They accepted her into their program. Her exuberance that day mixed with tears of joy brought a small smile to my face.
Now that Prim will be leaving, there's no point in having this membership with her gone.
"Let's keep it until I leave." She had said when I told her to drop it.
She holds my hand for support as we approach the desk, however no one is there. There's a small placard that reads "Will return in five minutes" though. I speed walk out of there before my time runs out to avoid seeing him.
Prim being the devoted sister she is, never leaves my side as we work out together in the yoga room for the next hour and a half.
As I'm drinking from the water fountain a moment later, in my haste to not run into a certain blue-eyed employee, I forget the steps that lead down from the fountain. It's not until I register pain near my foot that I realize I landed on my ankle. An unbidden cry of pain escapes my lips as I struggle not to move.
"Tsk. Tsk. Oh, dear. Are you hurt?" The lady who always wears a wig with a different color questions as she approaches me tentatively. I nod my head. "I'll go get help."
As I'm waiting for help to arrive, I think to myself maybe she isn't so bad.
"HELLO, EVERYONE. THERE IS A WOMAN OVER THERE IN NEED OF ASSISTANCE. SHE FELL DOWN THE STAIRS."
I take it back.
I stop crawling when the shooting pains get stronger.
Prim is by my side to scold me for not staying still to prevent any more damage to my injury. Her fingers lightly press around my ankle. I hiss in pain. "Stop! Stop! You're making it worse."
It seems everyone wanted to see the freak who can't walk down three fucking steps as I'm soon surrounded by a wide range of people asking me if I'm okay.
One voice drowns out all the others. A voice I've desperately missed. Bringing comfort and peace along with it as does the owner the voice belongs to.
"Katniss, what happened? Nevermind." He bends down and wraps one hand behind my back and one carefully under my knees. "I'm going to lift you up and carry you, okay?" Nodding in silence, he lifts me effortlessly. "Prim, grab my keys from the black bag on the floor and meet me outside." Peeta nods to the separate room for 'employees only' then, with a few gym goers holding doors open for Peeta to lead me through, we step outside to a black 2015 Range Rover parked by the curb.
Once the doors are unlocked, Peeta lays me gently on the back seats with extra care to my foot and closes the door. Prim is in the passenger seat biting her nails, a nervous tick she picked up from our mother, giving Peeta directions to the nearest hospital as he speeds down the highway.
"Alright, Miss Everdeen. Nothing too serious. Some swelling, slight bruises and partial tearing of the ligaments indicate a Grade 2 sprain that can take a matter of 6 weeks to heal."
"6 weeks?!"
Dr. Aurelius nods. "That must have been a nasty fall." He continues, "Over-the-counter pills will help ease the pain. I must stress that you rest that foot and stay off it in the meantime. I wish you a speedy recovery, Miss Everdeen."
Prim stands to hug me around my shoulders after Dr. Aurelius leaves. "I'm so glad you're okay." Her eyes dart to Peeta then back to me, "I'm going to check out the cafeteria here. I'm starving."
And with that, Peeta and I are alone.
I play around with my brace, adjusting it to a more comfortable position to stall for time but after a few minutes I know I have to break the silence first. I clear my parched throat. "Thank you for driving us here."
"You're welcome."
The fluorescent light above my bed makes a buzzing sound that echoes in the quiet of the room.
"You should head back. You'll be in trouble-"
Peeta cuts me off before I could finish. "Haymitch is there. He was in his office drinking when you had your accident."
I nod in assent.
In the time I was holed up in my room, using homework as an excuse to avoid the gym at all cost, I couldn't stop picturing Peeta and that blonde girl together. I was mad initially that he toyed with my feelings, then felt stupid that I was too blind to see he was a friendly guy who wasn't looking for anything more than a friendship, and finally accepting the fact that a guy that good-looking would be in a relationship with an equally good-looking partner. His barbie doll girlfriend definitely fits the bill.
I'm so lost in my thoughts I missed what Peeta said. "What?"
The corner of his mouth lifted up in a hint of a smile that quickly disappeared, "How are you?"
"Besides getting my ankle sprained, I'm just dandy." My attempt at a light joke gets a wider smile stretching across his face. "In all seriousness, I guess I'm okay. You?"
"Missing you."
My heart skips a beat as my head snaps up at his answer. His arms crossed and tense shoulders combined with his cerulean eyes squinting in my direction, challenging me to defy him, brings a chill up my spine, but not in a bad way.
His piercing gaze searches my face for something. What he finds must satisfy him for the grin he sports seconds later.
I glare at him in retaliation.
"Where's your girlfriend?" I had to ask. She probably won't be psyched to hear he left his job to take care of me. "Won't she be worried where you're at?"
His brows furrow, in a cute way I must admit, in confusion, "I have a girlfriend? Since when?"
I huff in frustration, blowing my bangs to the side, "The blond girl who was hanging around you last month. She kept playing with your hair?" Baffled by his abrupt guffaw, I stop. "Why are you laughing at me?"
"You thinking my sister is my girlfriend is hilarious." He wipes a single tear out of the corner of his eye. While he finds this humorous, I'm wondering if my eyes will pop out of my sockets considering the fact how wide they must be right now.
Am I that blind?
"I wouldn't say that. More like a misunderstanding." Peeta replies. Shoot. I didn't mean to say that out loud.
I'm hiding my embarrassment by keeping my head low, angled away from his view, but I feel his fingers grab a hold of my chin to face him. He's at his full height now, his chair empty, standing next to my bed. Up close, he has small freckles sprinkling his nose.
Staring at me in awe, he whispers to himself, "You have no idea the effect you have."
At a normal tone, he says, "I actually want you to be my girlfriend. I've been a goner for you since day one. There's never been any girl who I've met quite like you. I want to see where this goes. To see your face everyday, to share long chats with you about meaningless things just to hear your beautiful voice, to touch you when I want and trust me, that's all the time." His saucy wink gets the butterflies in my stomach going crazy. "But most of all, I want to call you mine. Will you let me?"
His response leaves me tongue-tied. I honestly can't form words. It's such a relief to know he feels the exact way I do for him.
"Yes." I whisper breathlessly.
Peeta smiles toothily for a moment then angles his head down to kiss me when Prim enters. We both groan at the bad timing.
"Aww, did I come at a bad time?" Prim directs at me. "Too bad. Now you know how Rory and I felt on Christmas."
"Let's take you home, Katniss."
I throw my arm around Peeta's broad shoulders as he picks me up off the bed. He kisses my forehead softly, as if he couldn't resist, then follows Prim.
I lay my head against his chest, basking in the safety of his arms.
….
Two weeks later
RING! RING! RING!
A tall figure hovers in my doorway. "You rang?"
My arms extend out, indicating I want to be carried. "Bathroom."
Peeta takes me in his embrace and leads me to the bathroom across the hall. "If the sole reason you keep me around is to be your slave, I deserve some form of payment. I cannot work under these conditions!"
I laugh against his shoulder, marveling at the fact that this man is mine and I am his. "Hey, it was Prim's brilliant idea. Who am I to deny my little sister who is studying to become a doctor in three years?" Peeta's glare isn't as threatening as he thinks and I tell him so. He sets me down carefully, me catching the door handle for balance, "Does it really bother you to be bossed around by me?"
His pupils dilate, the black swallowing up the blue, as he steps closer to me until our noses are touching. "I can think of other ways you can boss me around." He squeezes my backside as our lips connect.
There's a sound of disgust a minute later that interrupts our passionate make out sesh. "I've lost my appetite." Prim turns back around to the kitchen with her cereal bowl.
I give one more lingering kiss to Peeta then limp inside the bathroom. At the last minute I face him and ask, "Can you stay here again?"
A soft smile crosses his face. "Always."
….
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