"Stark, do I look like a babysitter to you?"
Tony Stark looked up and hesitated, knowing those words were a well-placed trap. Natasha Romanov stood in the entryway to his lab, across from Tony's desk. Her arms were crossed at her chest and an unamused, but otherwise unreadable expression rested on her face. Her hair was red again, Tony noted, having last seen her as a dark brunette. This time, though, it was longer. Before it had been cropped into a neat pixie cut. Now, it reached just to her shoulders, but the playful curl at the end kept it from touching them.
"You look like a lot of things, Nat," Tony replied in as even a tone as he could manage, barely sparing a glance from the latest enhancement to his suit. "I can make you a list. No wait, I'll have FRIDAY make you a list."
Natasha's expression slid into a glare and she crossed over to the metal desk. She placed her hand down forcefully and leaned over so that Tony was forced to look her in the eyes. Nothing was said, but the silence perfectly highlighted her displeasure. Despite himself, he swallowed thickly. He wasn't scared of her. At least, that's what he told himself.
Tony sighed and set his tools down before he leaned back in his chair. "What do you want, Nat? I'm busy."
"I want to know why you're sending me to Siberia with Spider-Man."
"Oh? That's all?" Tony let an amused puff of air escape his nose as he moved forward to retrieve his tools. "It's Spring Break."
"What does that have to do with anything?" Natasha's tone betrayed her annoyance. Clearly, she felt, Stark was screwing with her.
"Well, the kid can't miss school," Tony replied as if that had been the obvious answer all along.
"Stark," Natasha warned.
He glanced back at her and dramatically rolled his eyes as if her questioning was ridiculous. "Look, I want to give the kid something to do that gets him out of trouble," he explained to Natasha's narrowed eyes. "And he hasn't been formally introduced to SHIELD yet, so I figured, hey, send the kid to Russia, he's out of my hair and it's an educational field trip. Win-win."
"I'm going to Siberia to get extremely sensitive information and bring it back to the compound," Natasha explained in a tight voice. "I'm not going on a 'field trip.' This isn't for kids."
"And fighting aliens in New York is a regular Family Friday activity?" Tony retorted with a small laugh. "Come on, Nat, just take him with you, show him around, get out." Natasha didn't look convinced and Tony softened his expression. He would never admit that he looked as though he were begging, but his eyes betrayed a deep wanting. "Look, Petey needs this. His midterms were a little rough, but he made it out, but only because I took his suit for the week. So, he feels a little… useless. No biggie. Probably. So I wanted to make it up to him."
For the briefest of moments, Natasha seemed almost amused. Stark had a real soft spot for the kid and everyone on the team loved to tease him about it. If she hadn't been more occupied with the prospect of taking a child on a mission, she might have also poked a little fun at Tony for the affection that was evident in his voice.
"Then, why don't you take him somewhere yourself?" she questioned. "It's not like you need charity to go on vacation." Tony sucked in a hesitant breath and Natasha caught his wary expression before he could restrain himself. "Why don't you take him somewhere yourself?" Her words came slowly and her eyes narrowed as she started to realize that he was indeed hiding something from her.
Tony let out a long breath and looked at anything in the room beside Natasha. The wall, the ceiling, the half-finished prototype robots sitting on the other side of the room. Still, he couldn't escape her all-consuming gaze. As usual, it was very difficult to hide something from Natasha. She had been trained to dig out the truth, after all, and he knew he wouldn't be able to keep the secret much longer.
"We're meeting with the Secretary of State next week," he mumbled.
"What?" Natasha shouted. "And I'm being sent out to Siberia? You're trying to get me out of your hair too!"
"Yeah, because last time you threatened him!"
"It was just light intimidation! You can't negotiate without a few threats!"
"Yes! Yes, you absolutely can!"
Natasha pulled her hand from the desk to pinch the bridge of her nose in agitation. She turned around and paced a few feet over towards the wall. "You're a real piece of work, Stark," she commented with an edge to her voice.
Of all the reactions Tony could have gotten from her, he figured this was likely best-case scenario. He'd seen her mad before and, more specifically, mad at him before. If he wasn't on the receiving end of a taser, he considered it a small disagreement. Rather than rebuke her criticism, he just shrugged, picked up his tools, and began to tinker with his suit once more. The silence between them was heavy, but manageable, though it soon became clear that Natasha wasn't just going to walk away from the conversation.
"Look, Nat," Tony offered, stealing a hesitant glance at his friend. "We need this to go smoothly. We're hanging by a thread. We also need that info and Petey needs a break. If it makes you feel any better, I can absolutely guarantee that you'll have more fun in Siberia than we will in Washington."
There was another long pause, but Natasha did turn halfway around. The expression on her lips couldn't quite be called a smile, but the ends of her mouth were turned upwards and a playful glint appeared in her eyes once more.
"That bad?" she asked, though she knew these meetings were not fun. The Avengers weren't exactly on Congress's good side and the administration only tolerated their existence.
"The worst," Tony replied with an exaggerated huff. "I don't even think they're putting out appetizers for us."
"Tragic." Natasha turned back towards Tony and stopped just a few feet from his desk. "Alright, maybe a few days with the kid won't be so bad."
"He's a good one," Tony insisted. "A little impulsive. Kinda dumb sometimes. But, he tries. I'm sure you'll get along just fine. I think he could learn a thing or two from you. You know, not as much as he learns from me, but, well I am me after all."
"Has he learned humility from you?" Natasha asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Unfortunately not."
"Thank God."
The pair shared a smile and Natasha crossed over to the wall the desk was against. She leaned her back against it, the palms of her hand pressing against the cool surface. "Okay, Stark, I'll take the kid for the week. Show him around, introduce him to all the nerds out there. I'll do my best not to break him."
"That would be preferable," Tony replied. "Otherwise I'd have to hand you over to his aunt."
"Hard-ass?" Natasha questioned.
"Nah. Impossibly hot. Hotter than any aunt should be. Like, holy shit."
"Aren't you engaged?"
"I've got eyes, Nat."
"Right..." Natasha shook her head.
"Just keep him safe, got it?"
"When have I ever gotten into needless danger?" Natasha teased. Tony was about to respond that he was serious, but he noticed she was now staring at him with a devilish smile playing on her lips. She pushed herself off the wall, offered him the smallest of waves, and exited the lab without another word.
"Karen, how much longer do I have to do to school for?"
"Approximately four-hundred and twenty-two days are left of your secondary school career," came the kind response. "Of course, that is not including higher education, which would extend your days left in school. There are a few variables, but I can make you a list of possible outcomes."
"Nah, it's cool, thanks." Peter sighed as he glanced out the dirty classroom window. At least it was now more like four-hundred twenty-one and a half days left of school. He was also thankful to have Karen whenever he had questions or just wanted someone to talk to. After a few other modifications to his suit, Peter developed wireless earbuds that connected to Karen's mainframe and were also easily hidden in his ear. He was an honest kid and never used her for answers on tests, but he did chat with her during study hall.
"Hey!" heaved a voice before Peter heard the sound of someone flopping into the seat next to him. Tearing himself from the window, he found Ned looking over at him excitedly.
"Hey, man," Peter greeted. Ned immediately picked up on his somber expression.
"You cool?" Ned asked.
Peter pondered his response for only a second before nodding. "Yeah, I'm cool. I just hope we don't get our English midterm back before school lets out. I don't need to give May something to ground me for."
"I'm sure you did fine," Ned insisted. "Besides, didn't you have, like, the whole Avengers there to help you study?"
Peter blanched at Ned's casual dropping of his superhero buddies, but they were also in the corner of the classroom, away from most of the rest of the class. He didn't think anyone would overhear.
"Ah, yes," Peter replied dryly, just keeping himself from rolling his eyes. "An old soldier, a scary lady, an archer, a god, a billionaire, and a Hulk. Tutors of the year. Not to mention, they obviously have nothing better to do with their lives than help some kid with his English homework."
"But you're not just some kid. You're," Ned dropped his voice so low Peter wouldn't have understood him if he didn't know exactly what he was going to say. "Spider-Man."
"Yeah, well he doesn't need good grades. I think he's got plenty of job security as it is."
Ned just shrugged, but he managed to draw a smile from his friend, something he hadn't seen in a few weeks. "So?" he asked, prodding Peter playfully with his pen.
"So? What?" Peter asked, batting his hand away.
"You said that Tony Stark was going to send you somewhere super cool for Spring Break! It's Friday and Spring Break starts tomorrow. So, where are you going?" When Peter elected to stare at the floor rather than answer, Ned offered, "Hawaii? Japan? Oh! Australia! I wonder if you'll come back with an accent! G'day, mate," he tried in what was perhaps the worst attempt at any accent Peter had ever heard.
"No, it's not any of those," Peter mumbled.
"Private Island, then? Disney?" Ned frowned. "Oh, is it Canada? Sorry, man."
Peter looked back up at him. "No! And there's nothing wrong with Canada!"
"Then where is it?"
Peter pursed his lips and then sighed before leaning his head into his arm that rested on the desk. His fingers brushed his hair back and he heaved another sigh before mumbling, "Siberia."
"Alright, Petey, chop-chop. Let's go. Last call for Peter Parker flight 182 to beautiful Siberia!"
Peter groaned as he lugged his suitcase across the hanger inside the expansive Avengers compound in upstate New York. He still wasn't thrilled about spending his Spring Break in one of the coldest places on Earth. He thought ruefully of all the fake messages he had to record for Aunt May so she would think he was on an internship-provided vacation.
"Hi May, it's Peter. Just wanted to let you know that we landed in Hawaii and it's already so awesome. We'll be in the mountains so I don't know if reception will be the best. Don't worry, I'll call you. Talk to you soon! Love you!"
"Hey May, hope you're doing well. Hawaii is so great. We went snorkeling today. I miss you lots. Love you! Bye!"
"Hi Aunt May, it's me! Hawaii is the best and Mister Stark is so cool! Okay, talk later, love you!"
Peter looked over at Tony. "Isn't this a private jet? We can leave whenever we want!" Preferably, never. Maybe only to go back to his apartment so he could spend his Spring Break like a normal kid; doing absolutely nothing of value.
"Nope, we're on a strict timetable, kid, so let's move." Tony was right behind him, about an inch away from physically shoving Peter towards the small sleek jet he would be taking to Siberia. It was the jet of choice for a small team outing somewhere, whether that be to a mission or a hideout. Peter might have found it cool if he wasn't so busy huffing.
"I can't believe you're sending me to Siberia," Peter grumbled for the tenth time that morning. Tony restrained himself from eliciting a strained groan of his own. Were teenagers always so angsty? Was he like this as a kid? How did his parents ever make it through the teenage years? And how would he make it through Peter's teenage years?
"Hey, there are plenty of kids out there who would love a free trip to Siberia!" he replied with a stern sideways glance. "Be grateful!" He tried to ignore how much like his father he sounded, as he always tried to do every time he interacted with Peter. Tony had never seen himself as a parent and he was sure Peter didn't see him as one either, but there was something about the kid that made him just so… Parent-able. It was probably all the dumbass things he did and the constant eye rolls.
Peter's eyes flipped up and around again as they stepped up to the jet and Tony once again restrained himself from pushing him up the ramp and quicking shutting the door. Peter wasn't entirely convinced that it was every kid's dream to head up to Siberia when there were other places in the world that weren't Siberia to go to, but he didn't argue that point. It was only when he turned back to Tony at the base of the ramp to the plane that he noticed he was the only one of the two who had a suitcase.
"You got your bags on the jet?" he asked Tony, who shook his head.
"Nope, not going."
"What?" Peter shouted, his voice bouncing off the metal walls and creating a small echo. "You're sending me to Siberia by myself?"
"I'm not an idiot, Pete. Jeeze. Of course I'm sending you with someone." Tony turned to look up the ramp that led into the jet and Peter followed his gaze. As their eyes focused on the inside of the plane, a woman came into view and took a few steps down the slope. She stopped about halfway down the ramp and rested a hand on her hip. A bored expression lingered on her face and her lips were pursed in a tight line. She looked like she had neither the time nor patience to deal with either Peter or Tony. This was the first time Peter had ever stopped so closed to the Black Widow and it was in that moment that Peter's brain stopped working. The only sound that escaped his gaping mouth was a mangled, "Wha-"
After another half a minute of Peter gaping at the unamused Natasha, Tony said, "Okay, so Peter, Natasha. Spider-Kid, Black Widow. This is going to be great. Wonderful. You two will be the best of friends."
"Let's go, kid, they're expecting us at five," Natasha said simply before disappearing back into the jet. Peter's head snapped over to Tony who looked rather pleased with himself.
"You're sending me with her?" Peter whispered furiously. "Seriously?"
"What?" Tony asked with an innocent smile. "Nat's the best, you'll have so much fun. Besides, you guys can bond about spider stuff. You know… webs. Climbing. Avoiding bug spray." He placed a hand on Peter's back and not too gently shoved him up the ramp. Peter almost tripped over himself but managed to save both his footing and the duffle bag he was carrying from meeting the floor. "Chippy-chop, Spider-kid. Let's go, I wouldn't want to be the one that makes Nat late."
With one last glare, Peter made his way to the top of the ramp. "Bye, Underoos!" Tony called. "Have a nice trip! Don't forget to try the snowcones!"
Before Peter could shout back, the door was closed and the jet started making whirring noises. The front wall dropped down and the morning sunlight streamed into the hanger. The jet slowly moved forward from its spot towards the entrance. After another moment to wait for the signal, it shot out quicker than a person could blink and was out of sight before Tony had even raised his hand to wave.
So, I wrote a very quick oneshot that ended up with Peter & Natasha bonding. It happened really randomly, but I loved the idea of "Spiderbros" hanging out, and then this idea came to me!
As things come up and change in the editing process, I will add any tags/warnings to this fic as needed. Any trigger or content warnings will be at the top of chapters that need them. I don't anticipate this being rated more than T.
This will likely be a longer story, but the action will kick on in the next few chapters! Thanks for reading and enjoy!