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(Thoughts)
Hello everybody! And welcome to "Mamoru in Hollywood" were our favorite leading lady will get to interact with your favorite stars in her "wolfgirl" outfit! So with nofurther delays...
`Alex Amsel Is Nuts Productions´ Presents... All the way from my twisted mind, the star of "My First Night in the Akatsuki", "Forbidden Fruit", and "Ran Away from the Garden of Eden", MAMORU HIRASAWA!
*APPLAUSE*
Mamoru: Thank you! *blows kiss* You're too kind! So on today's show I'll be interviewing three of your favorite stars, I'll get to play games with them and YOU get to watch! lol... So I'll try to please everyone's tastes in movies and music, but I'm not good at guessing so if you could review and give some suggestions.. I'd be very happy to call and interview you're favorite beautiful people!
Sasuke: I love you, Mamoru!
Mamoru: Ugh.. Who the *beep* let him out of the cage? Sai-chan, Naruto-chan! Lock him up..
*Naruto and Sai walk in and drag Sasuke backstage*
Mamoru: So, Naruto and Sai are the security guys and Sasugay is my crazy stalker, who is supposed to be locked up in the DUNGEON... But no worries, let's start already! Our first guest is veeery popular amongst the gals! (Except Alex-sama and me) He is famous for his "good looks", and songs like "Baby" and "Somebody to Love"...
*fangirl sream*
Mamoru: Oh, yeah girls... Get ready for some sickly sweet *beep*! JUSTIN BEAVER! *adjusts headphone* (whispered: Huh? What's that? Bieber? Oh.. My bad...) Sorry guys... My mistake... JUSTIN BIEBER!
JB: Hi everybody! *girlish smile*
*JB sits on a chair next to Mamoru*
*fangirl scream*
Mamoru: Hellooo, Bieber-san! Welcome to "Mamoru in Hollywood"!
JB: I'm really happy to be here, Mamoru.. *overly girly smile*
Mamoru: You sure smile a lot kid... Which brings me to my first question.. Don't your cheeks ache? I mean, do you get like face cramps, or something like that?
JB: (Why the hell didn't she swoon? Why didn't she kneel to my smile? Well, whatever it is.. She won't resist this) Well, I like smiling a lot, I never get tired of it! *smiles and flicks hair gayishly*
Mamoru: Wow, you're hair is soo glossy! Not as glossy as mine or Alex-sama's red mane, but almost! Next question: Do you ever get hair problems, like dandruff or split ends?
JB: *looking nervous* N-never... (How did she resist the smile/hair flicking combo?)
Mamoru: Right.. Lets take it as if I believe you... And LET THE GAMES BEGIN!
*Sakura and Ino come in and bring a bowl full of papers and a big box*
Mamoru: So we're playing truth and lies! You get a paper from the bowl, each paper has a question you HAVE to answer... If you tell the truth nothing happens, but if you lie to me then you fall into the pit of despair...
JB: Pit of despair?
Mamoru: Well, as you can see, our audience is divided in two... One side of girls and gays and the other of boys and lesbians... If you lie you fall into the pit of fangirls and if I lie I fall into the pit of fanboys... You, ugly *beep* bring the bowl before I bitchslap you!
*Ino and Sakura put the bowl between Mamoru and JB.. Then Sakura takes two little machines out of the box and connects them to Mamoru and JB.."
JB: What is this?
Mamoru: A lie detector... Your results will appear on the screen to your left.. *screen goes on* And mine will appear on the screen on my right... *screen goes on* Ready?
JB: Ready...
Mamoru: Ok... I'll start, if you don't mind... *takes paper from bowl... unfolds paper* Would you be so kind to read the question, Bieber-san? *hands paper to JB*
JB: Have you ever had s-sex in a car?
Mamoru: Nope, not that I remember...
*screen says...TRUE!*
Mamoru: Ok.. Now you take a paper and I'll read the question...
*JB takes paper and hands it to Mamoru*
Mamoru: Soo... Are you single?
JB: Yes
*screen says...TRUE!*
*fangirl scream*
Mamoru: Right... *takes paper and gives it to JB*
JB: Does *beep* size matter?
Mamoru: Of course not! If they know how to use it...
*screen says...TRUE!*
*JB takes papaer and hands it to Mamoru*
Mamoru: Nice pick, Bieber-san! Are you a virgin?
JB: Y-yes... *nervous giggle*
*screen says... FALSE!* *BEEP!* *BEEP!*
Mamoru: OMG! Bieber-san! I'm so sorry but you're going straight for the pit of despair, where fangirls will rip your *beep* off... *lifts JB with superhuman stength and throws him into the pit of fangirls.. JB dissappears into the fangirls..*
Mamoru: Who would've thought that our beautiful Justin Bieber was not a virgin anymore! Sorry for all the sick fangirls who dreamt of corrupting him... Now lets go to commercials... But soon you'll see my unusual next guest! Until then...