**Disclaimer**
**I do not own Snape, Hogwarts, nor anything contained in the HP series what-so-ever, they are sole property of JK Rowling, etc etc.**
"Sidhe" is pronounced "Shee", which is featured commonly in Celtic mythology and stories from the British Isle/Ireland, in the event you're interested in learning more. The idea for the story came from the 7th book, where both Snape and Lily had a doe patronous, enjoy.
It was the beginning of summer, two kids sat in a park talking to each other about the wonders of the wizarding world. Lily Evans and Severus Snape, two very different wizards; but one could not help but notice that his female companion captivated Severus. The expression on his face was pure adoration; he wanted nothing more than to be near her always. Lily, on the other hand, did not notice the gleam in her friend's eyes and was watching some children play whilst asking various questions and keeping her lustrous emerald eyes away from the sable ones who caressed every inch of her skin. It was only when Lily asked about a childhood fairy tale that her grandmother had told her that she turned to Severus.
"Sev, is it true that there's something called a Sidhe?" Severus blushed and looked away from her, but luckily, Lily didn't notice his embarrassment.
"I've heard of them, no one has ever seen one. Most of the Sidhe probably went extinct by now, or else were reverted back to their original forms and dwell elsewhere. My mum says that there's a special Sidhe, she disobeyed the Fairy Queen by saving a mortal whom she loved. As punishment…well, you already know the story." He pretended to stare at a sparrow that had set itself upon a water fountain and Lily shoved him lightly.
"No tell me the rest of it!" Severus pretended not to notice again, but he quickly glanced at her from the corner of his eye, Lily noticed and shoved him again laughing.
"SEV!"
"Alright! Calm down, you said you knew the story." He looked at her and let his eyes wander over her again, of all the horrible shit in his meaningless existence, Lily was the only thing that made him feel something other than fear and hate. His looks were never lustful or perverse, Lily never noticed the warmness to his usual cold lifeless eyes, but that didn't bother Severus.
"I want to hear your version, the wizard version." Her voice was so melodic, it made Severus blush again at the thought that she wanted to hear his version.
"Well,legend says that the Sidhe queen, who had become infuriated by her handmaidens' lack of servitude, sentenced one hundred of them to take the form of white hinds and to go out into the world of Muggle and wizard. They were to grant the wishes of men, be able to take on any form desired by their masters, and once the life of their master expired—so would the Sidhe's sentence. Most of the Sidhe who were subjected to this, were not excited by this prospect at all, having spent their fairy lives messing around and disobeying their queen. So, it fell onto men to capture them, and if a man did capture her—she was bonded to him for his lifespan. Legend said that a Sidhe could be caught only by conventional means, no magic could be used against them, in order to capture a Sidhe—a man would have to be willing to follow her for days, weeks, hell even years and injure her with an arrow or trap her in a net or pit. But the men had to be careful, because if the Sidhe was too weak after her capture, she would perish and so would their lives."
"I want to find this magical Sidhe, and free her, she must be so lonely." Lily leaned against Severus's shoulder, he flinched a moment and then cautiously laid his chin on the top of her head.
"I'm sure someone has already found her Lily, there are plenty of wizards who would do anything to capture her. If she isn't just a fairy tale, if she was real, I'm sure they would have gone extinct by now." He could smell her hair and he closed his eyes a moment, if he could find that magical hind he would make Lily his forever.
"Has anyone ever seen her?" Lily asked cautiously, putting her face against his skinny chest, she could feel the bones poking through the thin skin, it frightened her to some degree, but she realized once more why he was so thin and gangly. Severus did not have the best father, the man beat his mother and Severus himself, nor did they always have something to eat.
"My mum said that my great grandfather had, but he had not been able to capture her at all. She is immune from enchantment." He opened his eyes and glanced down at her, he knew she could feel his bones, he knew that she felt sorry for him, but that would never change his love for her.
"Sev, if I were to catch the Sidhe, I would give you a better home."
"Uh…thanks Lily, that's sweet." He closed his eyes; that's the only reason she was near him, pity. He felt his heart sink.
"Lily!" It was Petunia, Lily's sister. Snape grimaced as Lily swiftly moved and started to run to her sister, she turned for a brief moment to look at Severus.
"Goodbye Sev!" She called and ran to her parents and sister. He sighed heavily, watching her leave broke his heart, he hated it when she was gone, then it meant he had to be back in the darkness.
"I love you Lily…" He whispered, "and if I were to catch that white doe I would show you how much I love you. I'd want to be with you always, regardless if you're a muggle born or not…"
Five years later…
Severus was nearly fifteen, well in January anyway but he and Lily were inseparable. They walked together in the hallway, chit chatting about the usual gossip when Lily leaned against a wall.
"Let's take a breather huh?" She brushed her crimson hair from her eyes, glancing at him coyly, he smiled very faintly, he wanted to brush the hair from her eyes and kiss her mouth hard in front of everyone, but he restrained himself. No, kissing Lily might ruin his chances of ever hoping to be anything more than just a friend; it might even ruin their friendship completely.
"Yeah." His voice was quiet, he gazed over her body hungrily, and as usual Lily didn't even notice. She made a squeak and began to fish for something in her bag, she pulled out a book and held it out to him.
"Oh I almost forgot, I found this at the Library." He took it from her gingerly, eyeing it cautiously and cradling it like it was his own child.
"What is it?" He asked curiously, Lily smiled when he looked up and he smiled back.
"Remember the story about the Sidhe?" Severus nodded and Lily giggled, oh god, he loved everything about her, he was so captivated by her at the moment that he didn't notice Potter and his crew come up behind him. Sirius gave Severus a sharp kick in the butt and launched him into Lily, Severus had to keep balance and tried not to fall into Lily's face. He instead got bee-lined towards her chest, a dream come true of course, but he moved out of the way just in time to hit the floor instead.
"SIRIUS! That was RUDE!" Lily screamed, her eyes darting furiously at the four of them.
"Oh sorry there Snivellus, I didn't see you." Sirius lied. James laughed at looked at Snape on the floor who was fuming pissed; Snape rose slowly and brushed off his second hand robes.
"Hey you didn't try to fall into Lily's chest did you? Now that would be a serious offense Snivelly-wivelly. Us Gryffindors would hate it if you muddied up one of our own." James's voice was high pitched and Snape knew Sirius had done it on purpose. He glared at them all and huffed, clutching the book even though his elbow was scraped badly and was bleeding, as were his knees.
"Shut up Potter!" Lily said angrily, grabbing Snape's hand, "Come on Sev."
When Lily grabbed his hand Snape got a smile on his face and turned to Potter and gave him a look that clearly said, 'What are you going to do about it?'. As the pair walked off, Lily let go of his hand, which disappointed Snape very much but there was nothing he could do about it. It was either get his ass kicked by Potter and his gang or get his ass kicked by Potter and his gang even more for Lily going out with him.
"Lily, about the Sidhe, no one's seen her in centuries, not even Dumbledore has seen her!"
"I saw her." Lily whispered, Severus blinked and grabbed her hand and hauled her toward a broom closet and pulled her close to him.
"What? Where?" His luck was just starting to turn, if he could track the deer down then Lily would be his forever.
"She—she was, oh no, I'm afraid someone might kill her…Sev…" Her voice was desperate, he pulled her closer and hugged her kissing the top of her hairline.
"It's okay Lily, no one would ever kill her, she's immune to enchantment."
"But not to arrows!" Lily whispered fiercely, "or guns!"
"Lily…the Sidhe is immortal." He chuckled, "Nothing could ever harm her."
"Really?" Lily asked staring up at him, he nodded once and she squeezed him tightly, "OH SEV! We'll find her together."
"But she can only have one master Lily, and if we find her together, I want you to have her until the day you die."
"That's sweet Sev. But you deserve her more than I do…" She pulled back away from him and smiled at him.
"So, where did you see her?" He asked gently and quietly.
"She was on Hogwarts grounds, yesterday morning, just before dawn near Gryffindor tower. She…she looked straight at me Sev and I knew. Then some fog rolled in and she was gone." She giggled, "Do you think she'll be back tonight?"
"Hard to say, I doubt it. How do you know it was a Sidhe and not an albino deer?"
"Sev, just by the way she glanced at me in the tower. I just knew. I'm scared that Potter and his friends might hurt her, or some Slytherins."
"She is immune to enchantment. Nothing bad will happen to her, I promise."
"Thank you Sev." She hugged him, "I'm going to be late for class. I'll see you later."
"Yeah." And like that, she was gone again. But she had seen the Sidhe, and he was one step closer to having his dreams realized.
That night Severus followed Potter and his friends outside to the grounds and started to head towards were Gryffindor tower was. The air was fresh and cold, Severus had to do his best to wrap himself in a blanket to keep from freezing, he glanced around to see if he was being followed and pulled his wand out just in case. He didn't see anything out of the ordinary and started to look for prints, he found nothing. He sighed and was just about to head back to bed when something caught his eye, he turned slowly, and there she was, drinking from a deposit of water. He wanted to run after her and capture her for she hadn't seen him yet, cautiously he took his blanket off and that's when the hind's neck shot up. They stared at each other, locked in a contest.
"No…don't run away…I need you…please. I need you Sidhe." He whispered, fearful that she would dart off, the doe did no such thing, and instead she began to walk towards him. When she got about three feet away, close enough to where he could capture her, he realized that it wasn't the Sidhe, it couldn't be. The hind was only about two and a half feet at the shoulder, closer looking to a fawn than an actual mythical Sidhe which was said to be about the size of a normal red deer, and it had twisted its back leg.
"You're not the Sidhe, I should have known." He glanced over her, "You're too small and your injured, probably just some stupid deer."
The doe heard and noise and lifted her head up quickly again, Snape turned, Dumbledore was standing only a few feet away.
"Professor!" Snape hit the ground groveling almost and began to speak rapidly, "Sir I didn't mean to be breaking the rules but Lily Evans said she had seen the Sidhe and I figured I would come find her and—"
"Enough Severus, this deer is not the Sidhe perhaps, for they say she is immortal but she seems to really have taken a liking to you." Severus turned around and the deer was sniffing his clothing.
"I guess she has…" Severus replied.
"They say you have a knack for making potions, do you think you could heal this deer back to health and then release her?" Dumbledore asked, his expression jovial as usual.
"Yes sir."
"Very good, now take this deer to Hagrid and make a suitable potion for this lovely animal."
"Yes sir." Snape got up off the ground and turned to the deer, "come on."
But the animal did not budge, she kept staring at Severus in this peculiar way, he reached out and attempted to touch her but the animal jumped back a few feet.
"Go on." The headmaster encouraged the animal that gingerly followed the boy, the doe quietly gave a look to Dumbledore, and the two understood each other, though they were different species in just a look.
A week later…
The deer strolled outside in her own paddock as the different houses came to look at her, she didn't pay attention to any of them, save for when Severus came around, that was when she started to call out and bound for the gate. Everyone in school knew he had found this deer and Lily could hardly believe it. She and Severus went down to check on the deer after a class and stood beside the gate for a long while just staring at the hind.
"Oh Sev, she's beautiful. But she's not the Sidhe?" Lily turned to him and he blushed.
"No." He scratched his head, and all his dreams had gone down the drain. The Sidhe didn't exist at all. Lily hugged Severus.
"Well I had better go, I'll see you around." She started to walk away and once she was out of whispering distance he turned to the doe. No one was near him, it was just him and the doe now who stared at him with her beady black eyes.
"If only you had been the Sidhe, then Lily would be in love with me." He glanced down at the ground and sighed, that's when he heard the voice.
"How can you be so sure that I'm not what you claim I am?" He was startled a moment and looked back at the doe who was still gazing at him quizzically.
"Are you a Sidhe?" He leaned over the gate to stare at her; the doe lowered her head and resumed eating grass. "DAMN IT ARE YOU THE SIDH!"
"Oh now Snivelly gets off on talking to deer!" He recognized that voice and turned around, his eyes staring down James Potter and only James Potter.
"Shut up Potter." He turned back to the doe when James grabbed him and pushed him against the gate roughly.
"You listen here Snape and you listen well. Lily is my woman got it? She's a Gryffindor and you're a Slytherin. It would never work between you; you're too cold hearted for her. Too hideous for her. Look at you; you haven't even learned what a bar of soap is by the look of your hair. Stay away from her. Got it?"
"Never." Snape returned, his nostrils flaring and staring at him with an icy gaze. James punched Snape in the face.
"Stay away from Lily you freak." He hit him once more in the stomach and Severus doubled over and lay on the ground in defeat. James kicked him and laughed, he started to walk away cackling to himself. Once James was away, Severus heard the voice again.
"You let him push you around like that? Stand up for yourself." He turned around quickly and the doe was staring at him again.
"I must be going insane." Severus said, standing up and grimacing. The doe lifted her gaze and strode over to him.
"Insane? No, but since I've been watching you for a long time now, I suppose it would seem a little insane talking to me." His mouth dropped wide open and the doe got a look to her face that was about the deer equivalent of amusement. He realized her ears were tipped black, and her eyes had no pupils, it was like they were one big pupil and he could see his reflection clearly in them.
"You…are a Sidhe?" He inquired, staring at her, the doe nodded.
"The Last. The Hundredth Sidhe. I have been imprisoned in this form before the Gaels settled this land. But I am not yours, not yet anyway." She answered coolly. She smirked as Snape climbed the fence and sat down listening intently.
"Do you have a name?" He asked, she shook her head and closed her eyes.
"I have forgotten it."
"How can you forget your own name? The name you were born with? I assume you were born?" He leaned forward and she came close to his face, an angry look to her eyes.
"I have forgotten it." Her answer was cold, he shrugged and groaned, his stomach still hurt from the blow James dealt him. "Who is that Lily girl I keep hearing of?"
"Lily? She's the love of my life." The doe sniffed at the air indignantly, the boy was foolish, surely the visions she had been having of him were wrong.
"Oh, how so?" The hind asked curiously. He smiled widely.
"I've always loved Lily, I would give up my life just for her, I would do anything to feel her laying next to me…every single morning when we wake up we'd kiss and I'd make her breakfast." His little daydream was interrupted by the hind who had snorted at the notion of him making food for anyone.
"Boy I'm going to tell you something, you may love this girl but if you want her to love you back you better tell you how you feel."
"I can't." The doe's eyes widened, she stamped a foot and got right into Severus's face.
"Oh, you can't can you? Because you're so damn pathetic that you'd rather lose the woman of your dreams to that idiot than lose her as a friend and have her never speak to you again. Why not bring her here, show her what you've found?" The deer mused and watched as Snape got up and bounded away when he tried to touch her.
"You wouldn't speak to her; you won't even let me claim you."
The hind paused for a moment, then again she had damn good reason not to allow the teenagers lust to impact her plan, even if the boy had given her some kind of magical concoction to help her broken leg.
"Just bring her to me; I'll sort out the rest."
"What are you going to do to Lily?" He asked dangerously, his eyes flashing angrily.
"Nothing." The doe replied, and she was being honest too. She couldn't kill Lily or hurt her so it didn't matter anyway. Severus got up and jumped the fence again and started to hurry off, never looking back at the doe.
At Lunch Severus did exactly what the hind had asked him and he brought Lily down to see her. Lily was especially ecstatic when Severus conjured up a salt cube and told her she could feed them to the hind. At the fence the doe gave Severus a look and he knew what she wanted, she wanted him to leave.
"Lily, I forgot something, can I run back and get it real quick? I swear I'll be back." Lily smiled and nodded.
"Go Sev. I'll stay and keep the doe company." Lily turned back and attempted to pet the animal, which leapt away from her almost instantly. Snape started to run away from the paddock but saw Potter and his gang and fled towards where he knew the hind wouldn't be able to see him.
There was Lily, talking to her like she was some adorable pet. The sun shone on her hair and made it sparkle, Snape felt his heart grow warmer and his eyes wandered all over her, stopping on her breasts a few times. But he was allowed just this once.
"I wish you were the Sidhe. Then Severus could have a better life. And I wouldn't be so worried about him all the time. He's a wonderful friend." Lily wasn't even paying attention to the doe until it spoke.
"You really think I am not the Sidhe?" Lily jumped back a few feet rather than the hind this time and the doe's ears lowered, "Relax. He hasn't claimed me yet; I won't allow it, not yet anyway. Look, you're a damn fool if you don't realize that boy fawns over you like you are Helen of Troy."
"What…you…you are the Sidhe?" Lily stammered, shaking so badly she dropped the cubes of salt that Severus had given to her. The doe's look of amusement came back to her face.
"He's not like the other boys, not like the one who they call 'Potter'. You should be happy that he is your friend and that he loves you." The doe remarked, Lily gasped and started to cry, Severus wanted to spear the hind but something in his head told him to wait. The hind and the girl stared at each other for a moment, and finally the doe spoke again.
"Don't you know that he will never end up like the rest of his Slytherin pals? He has someone in his life that causes him to be joyful and that person is his light. Don't you know who that person is Lily?" The girl was crying so hard but she glanced up at the deer and finally something snapped within her, Lily stepped away from the deer.
"You lie. Severus doesn't love me." Could the deer raise an eyebrow she would have, the doe shrugged in a deer way.
"You have a week to decide. On the full moon if you still don't believe me, I will prove it to you. That is the word of the Sidhe."
"And what happens if your word isn't true?" the girl asked cautiously. The hind laughed and ran around the pasture kicking up her gangly legs and cackling like a mad person. Lily didn't find this at all amusing, but finally the doe stopped and very bluntly spoke.
"I'll die." The hind paused a moment before laughing, "No, that's rather a bunch of bullshit, but I do have morals and standards obviously—even if we are notoriously two faced."
"What are they?" Lily questioned, still being rather suspicious that this creature was really what she claimed.
"What, you don't believe me?" She answered.
"Forget this, I'm leaving."
No! Damn it! What the hell does this beast think she's doing! Severus thought for a moment he really would kill the animal. Lily stormed off and Severus came out of hiding, screaming at the beast from ten feet away. His whole form shook with rage and there was a rabid nature in his cold eyes.
"I will fucking kill you! AND THEN STUFF YOU AND MOUNT YOUR HEAD ABOVE MY FIREPLACE!"
"For what? Scaring the poor girl?" The doe sighed, dipping her head slightly. The doe knew damn well Lily was too wound up over the whole 'your best friend loves you' business; the girl would wake up the next morning thinking it was a trick, a very amusing trick.
"Lily must fall in love with me." He muttered and the doe shook her head and snorted.
"I cannot perform any sort of love spell to make one mortal fall in love with another, even if you do capture me." She said cautiously, but the boy would have none of it.
"I would command it!" He bellowed and once more the hind shook her head, he turned away from her and began to flee from her fuming with anger.
"Mortals." She sighed, edging off to a far corner of the pasture and resuming grazing.
It seemed to the hind that the boy would never accept the limitations she was bound to. She knew if she were to follow through with his wishes currently and become his then the whole world could be forced to pay the consequences of his lust and greed. Though she didn't perceive that the future would entail that as fate would have it, Lily Evans would give birth to a miracle son, and it wouldn't be Severus's. If she couldn't even remember her own name, how was she supposed to return to the Fairy Kingdom, with no name and no sense of direction? Perhaps holding off was for the better, she had eluded capture for far too long and it had started to tear at her. Voldemort shot an arrow that had been meant to kill her, and the hind knew she could not afford to be captured by any man such as that. Whatever plans that fate had for her were not meant to be used for malevolent purposes. Severus had been utterly miserable the years he couldn't find the hind and she had been miserable without a home for what seemed a million years. Misery often finds other miserable souls to be with, and it was certain that her misery was being drained from her and she finally had company. If what she had seen in the visions was to be taken seriously, it was going to be a very long time before the boy was ready for such responsibility.
Fin Part One
