Promise
(One-shot)
Disclaimer: Do I look like I own Saiyuki?
Summary: Two souls, emerged in one body… Will they ever let the evil one control them completely? I won't let your soul disappear, even if it's the last thing I ever do. I promise… SeitenGoku relationship. Interlude to Never Let Go. Dedicated for Seiten and Goku's birthday. Spoilers from Never Let Go chapter 8 and 9.
A/N: There! I think I'll give up struggling to write NLG which is getting more and more stuck and relax up a bit by writing an interlude. And not to mention, today's Seiten and Goku's birthday! Inspirational right goes to Animeskid, for her brilliant review that triggered me this! Thanks, Animeskid!!
And as always, thanks for Peeps17 for the beta!
Hope you'll enjoy this!
It hurts…
Sheets tangled underneath a clenched grip. Brows knitted in fury, the look of pain shone through twisted features.
Hot…
Beads of cold sweat drip from his forehead, running down his flushed cheeks. The cold compress could do nothing against the heat that consumed the small body.
Painful…
He could no longer tell where he was, or what he was doing. All he knew that he was suffering.
Somebody… please help me…
Golden eyes flickered opening slowly. Through eternal darkness, he barely noticed a flash of light, like a glittering jewel within the black void.
The sun…
He stretched his hand, hoping to reach for the savior of this nightmare. But, just like trying to pin down a cloud, the warm ray kept slipping through his small fingers.
Don't leave…
The previously bright eyes fell into desperation as the light disappeared, absorbed by the darkness. He fell on his knees, staring into the endless oblivion.
Don't leave me…
Hot tears running down flushed cheeks, mixed up with cold sweat. Golden eyes closed in desperation realizing, he will never come out from this darkness. Not without the sun.
Just hang on, Son Goku. I won't let you suffer more than this…
The voice echoed within the silence like a church bell. He raised his head, tears still running freely down his smooth face, but a new hope rose within him.
Whose voice? So close, and yet so far… Just like the moon…
I promise, I will protect you…
He could barely feel it but a warm hand held onto his, gripping it firmly. He tried to hold it back, but it was like trying to hold onto air. Protect him? From what? From who…?
Just wait for me…
Wait? He still has to wait? Be in this darkness alone again?
His eyes widened as he felt the ghostly hold on his hand fade away.
No!!
He tried to scream for the person to come back, not to leave him alone anymore. Just to stay there, holding his hand, reassuring him that everything's alright. Despair filled his eyes as the voice completely faded away.
The moon had left him alone as well.
Somebody… anybody… help me…
He curled into himself, arms hugging his knees. Tears running down non-stop from luminous golden eyes, yet he made no attempt to stop them.
And then, as if that wasn't enough, it came.
AAAAAHH!!
It came like lighting in daylight. Bursts of pain filled his mind without warning, scattering his sanity. He clutched his head, screaming in agony. It felt as if his skull was being sliced in two. Like a bare hand forced its way into his head and forcefully ripped apart its contents.
S-STOP!!
Ignoring his pleas, it just dug deeper. He jerked his head, screaming until his voice was sore. His whole body hurt, but it was nothing compared to the damage being done inside. His mind was filled with fleeting images, like a movie being fast forwarded.
He was confused; everything swirling inside his head. Images of faceless people. Voices from nowhere. Colors of blood red, emerald, and amethyst flashed within his mind, each image bringing a new set of pain. It took a great effort from him to realize that the colors were actually persons' eyes. He gritted his teeth. He knew these people, these fading memories… He knew them; the feeling was unforgettable… But who…
Come to think of it… who's that man? That amethyst color seems familiar…
He didn't get to think about it further as another burst of pain exploded in his mind, burying the images deep within. Every time he tried to concentrate to remember, the image was forcefully ripped away from him.
It hurts… s-stop it… just stop…
Everything was mixed in, coming up at once, slowly eating away his sanity.
He wished it to just stop. He wished them it be gone, forever, never to disturb him. He was tired, confused, and alone.
Just… kill me… if it will make it stop…
His hands slowly made its way to his slender neck as he wrapped his fingers around it. He choked a little as he felt his finger tighten, slowly strangling the breath out of his own throat.
If this would put my suffering to an end…
He closed his tearful eyes, welcoming death with open arms. And then, like thunder, a roar took over his attention.
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING??
Golden eyes jerked open. He gasped as he felt his hands being yanked away from his neck. To his surprise, the pain that consumed him just seconds ago faded away.
He raised his head and saw a towering figure standing in front of him. His jaw flung open in disbelief. It felt like looking at the mirror. The figure was an exact replica of him; the only differences were the long hair, demonic pointy ears, and slit-pupil golden eyes. He stared at the figure, bewildered, unable to do or say anything. Who was this…? So strange… and yet so familiar…
You moron. What do you think you're doing? Trying to kill yourself? Trying to run away?
The long-haired boy snorted as he stared at the smaller form on his feet, cat-like eyes narrowed as he spoke harshly.
I don't remember having such a weak other self, Son Goku!
The tone of the words took him aback. There was anger, but he could feel barely suppressed worry within. This creature—this other self, was worried about him.
Who are you?
He finally voiced it, staring at the cruel split-pupil eyes above him. He could see the demon's expression harden into a stone mask.
I am you. You are me. Two souls in one body. Seiten Taisei Son Goku.
Golden eyes widened at the statement.
Seiten Taisei?
Yes.
My… other self?
Yes.
You're here… for me?
Eerie silence filled the place. Both pairs of golden eyes stared at each other, locked within each other's depths, trying to guess what was behind those gold pools.
Yes…
The stone mask curved into a somewhat smile, but more of a smirk, as Seiten lowered himself to his level. Their eyes met. He could feel a shudder run his spine as he locked his gaze with those predatory orbs.
Why?
Why what?
Why… are you here? Why are you worried about me?
There was a silence before the demon replied.
Because I'm afraid that I might lose you.
Bright orbs blinked at the statement. Losing him? How? Did it have something to do with this… darkness?
Losing me…? What do you mean by that?
The question went unanswered. Seiten kept his gaze locked at his, tense emotions swirling within his demonic features. Then, without warning, Seiten pulled him into a hug.
He gasped as he felt the demon's arms encircling his body, pressed so close until he could feel the other's body heat.
S-Seiten…?
Don't give up…
Eh?
No matter what happens, never give up. No matter how tempting, you must not give in. Don't forget our sun, no matter how painful it is...
He could feel Seiten's arms tighten around his body. He could even sense Seiten's emotions radiate from his body, which was pressed so closely against his.
You will not be alone. I will be with you through all this. I will stay by your side. But you have to promise me; you must keep fighting. You will not give up, for if you do, it will be the end of both of us. The end of our sun.
Finally Seiten broke the hug. With his clawed hands resting on the other's shoulders, the demon stared at his other half's youthful features.
Promise?
The demonic eyes were trying to say something. Everything was confusing. What did Seiten mean by never give up? What would happen to him? What was happening to him?
Yet… those eyes… those hands… they made him feel comfortable, and safe. Like a touch of a guardian angel. He knew he would be safe, as long as Seiten is beside him. He will be able to get through this, as long as Seiten is with him...
I promise.
Golden eyes softened as Seiten touched his cheek gently; the demon's expression somehow formed a smile.
Thank you… now I can let you go without worry…
The words took him aback. Let him go? What did he mean?
Seiten, what are you…?
He gasped in surprise as he felt his body being pulled away. Panicking, he turned to Seiten for help, only to find the said demon staring back at him with a sad smile.
S-Seiten? What's happening...?
Your time is up.
Eh?
It's time for you to go.
Go? Where? Will you go with me?
Seiten suppressed a sad smile.
I'd love to, but I'm afraid I can't do that. Don't worry, I'll be watching you from here. I've promised not to leave you alone.
You are! I'll be alone again!
You won't be. Your friends are waiting out there. They will find a way to save you.
What about you??
I will be here watching you.
But… you'll be alone, won't you?
Seiten just smiled sadly as he bowed his head.
I'm used to it. It's no big deal. I will not let your soul disappear, even if it's the last thing I do. I promise.
The force was becoming stronger. Tears threatened to fall as he felt his grip on Seiten weaken. By the time, he realized it that his sight had started to become blurry.
No… I don't want to go! I don't want to leave you alone!!
He cried with all his might, trying to reach for the demon. Seiten just smiled sadly as he slowly retreated out from his reach. Ignoring his pleas, the demon spoke.
Remember, keep on fighting. Don't let it control you, Goku. You must not lose your only precious sun. The path ahead might be painful to take, but you have to go.
He stared at Seiten, bewildered. He could see the emotions filling the demon's eyes. He imagined how painful it was to be left alone in a place like this. And yet, Seiten asked him to go. To fight. To reach for the sun. For their sun.
With new determination, he stared at his other half.
Seiten… if this is what you want, I will go. But you have to promise me… you will come back. We will meet each other again. We will bask in the sun together. Do you promise?
Silence fell over the place. Seiten stared at his other self's eyes, surprised at what he's just heard. Instead of answering, the demon closed his eyes.
He waited for Seiten to give the answer, trying to maintain his consciousness as he did so. Yet, the otherworldly force finally won him. He felt his body fade away, as well as his consciousness.
Before passing out completely, he heard Seiten whisper the answer, as the last words rang in his mind before darkness completely swallowed him.
I promise…
Pain.
It was the first thing he felt when he regained his consciousness. His head hurt a lot, as if it has been beaten up by a hammer. A groan escaped his lips as a massive headache attacked him. He kept still, waiting for the pain to fade away. And when it did, he hissed in frustration. The pain did go away, but it felt like it took a piece of him with it. An important memory. He could not remember what happened to him… he couldn't even remember what his dream was.
My dream… it felt like something important… Why can't I remember? Dammit… is something wrong with me?
He opened his eyes, blinking a few times to clear his vision. The first thing that came to his sight was spiky orange hair and patched right eye. He rubbed his eyes, trying to force his confused mind to work properly, as he finally recalled.
"Morning, ero-kami."
The simple words immediately freaked out the older guy. Bombarding him with curious questions, the patched-eyed guy asked him how he does he feel, what happened to him, and if something was wrong. Still confused and unfocused, he chose to ignore the bombardment and instead, setting his gaze out through the window, where the sun had peeked itself into the bright sky.
The sun…
There's something about the sun remembering him, something important. Or rather, someone important. But the thing is he could not remember what or who…
He shut his eyes tightly as pain forced its way to his head. It's always happened; every time he tried to recall remember, he was immediately granted with a massive headache.
But this time it's different. He felt like he had left something behind.
Someone…
A piece of himself…
You must not give up. No matter what it takes, you must not give in. Don't forget our sun, no matter how painful it is.
Don't forget our promise…
--OWARI--
A/N: Ending is totally screwed up, as usual --
Oh well, I only write this as a birthday present for Seiten and Goku. I hope it didn't turn out too much yaoi. Anyway, this little fic is related to Never Let Go. If you're getting confused with this I suggest you to read NLG first. And the continuation will also be told in NLG. What happened to Goku, what danger that surrounds him, and will he give up? Only NLG will tell.
And as usual, thanks for reading this, any comments will be appreciated.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SEITEN AND GOKU!!