Sadness...sadness and depression.
That combination is often how I find myself sitting in my room, knife in hand.
The blood stains the carpet, but I can easily clean it up. Plus, it's not that anyone goes in my room anyways.
Even when people do go in, they can't see the floor because of all the clothes and random papers.
I don't believe it really matters, no one would care. No one would notice me gone. No one would care.
I looked over at the rope that hung in my closet. I stood up at walked over to my large closet. It was big enough that I could hang and there would still be room.
I knew how to tie the right knot...one that would snap my neck.
It was easier and faster. I guess it was ok to find that way of going to be almost peaceful and calming.
The realization that no one would care also helped to make my decision.
I already had the rope around my neck when there was a loud and frantic knocking on my window.
I slipped out of the knot and walked over to the window, there stood the one person that made my heart beat faster than any human could ever understand. Blade.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!? WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING SO STUPID!?" he screamed at me through the window. I opened the window and he floated in, slapping me in the face. Instead of yelling at him, or slapping him back, I just looked at him.
"What?" I walked over and closed the door to my closet. He looked at me with his 'I-hate-you-so-much' face. I didn't pay any attention. He walked over to my bed and sat down. When I walked over and sat next to him. He lay back on the bed and sighed.
"Will you stop doing this shit?" he asked. I only sighed in response.
"So what are you doing back in Townsville?" I asked.
"I was flying by and notice your window." he said, and all I did was laugh at him.
"Ok, now tell me the real reason you're here." I said between my laughter. He laughed with me.
"Alyson called me and told me you were cutting again. Honestly...I don't know why you do this." he sighed again.
I got up and walked over to where the blood still stained the carpet. I threw a dirty shirt over the blood.
He walked over and put his hands on my hips. I tensed and he wrapped his arms around my waist in a tight hug. He nuzzled my hair and continued to hug me.
"What are you doing?" I asked, completely shocked at what he was doing.
"Doing what I should have done the first time this happened, 6 years ago." he said, as he turned me around in his arms. His deep purple eyes shone down at me as he leaned in. I didn't move, mostly hoping I wasn't dreaming, that this was actually happening...that the love of my life was standing in front of me, about to kiss me.
But our lips never touched, and the feeling of his arms around me faded and I was again alone in my room...crying over the love I have lost. Broken-hearted, I walked over to the closet again and put the rope around my neck. I hovered a little in the air before letting myself drop. Then darkness fell and this time, I didn't open my eyes again.
...
The found her, the next day. Even though they didn't know why, they knew it was going to happen...they just didn't know it would happen this fast. They thought they had time. When the news spread...everyone thought it was because of the fact BC and her sisters always made fun of the younger sister they never really wanted. No one ever knew it was because she felt she no longer had a purpose on earth. The love of her live was gone and now she was too. But somewhere...in the Between, two long lost loves met up again for the first time in 6 years.