Title: Back to Me

Warnings: Slash, angst, violence, language.

Note: This is a really over-due sequel to my story Love Apart. However!! There's no need to read the first story unless you want to.


Chapter One: Everything Changes

About a month later…

"You think he's ever going to act like himself again?" Delko asked Calleigh as they both watched Speed pull into the parking lot on his motorcycle. "Ever since that incident in New York he's been more withdrawn and distance. Or is it just me that's noticed it?"

Calleigh shook her head. "No, I've noticed it too. So has Horatio. He was just talking to me about it yesterday. He's worried that Speed's going to have a relapse or completely breakdown. After all, he went on that little vacation to deal with a problem he had and look where it got him. Now he won't talk about what happened to him there or what happened afterward. There really is need to be concerned for him." She placed a hand on Delko's arm and kissed his cheek. "Maybe you can corner him and get him to say something, anything that's not related to a case. I miss the old Speed."

"So do I," Delko agreed before she walked off, most likely heading for the gun vault.

He stood by the entrance to the lab a little longer while he watched Speed through the glass. It shouldn't amaze him how much things can change in a month. Two months ago Speed was working at the lab and they were finally starting to settle back into the groove of things after his shooting accident. Had he known that Speed needed to talk about the events of that day he would have pressed him into it. But maybe he was being naïve and he wanted to believe that Speed really was okay. Too bad things never turned out that way. Instead his best friend took off and met up with two other guys; who then came looking for him when Speed got pissed and left them behind. That was the first time Delko learned that Speed was gay. In all the years that they had been friends he had never known and he felt a little resentful that Speed never told him.

However, he quickly got over that. He had heard the recount of what happened from their boss, Horatio. How Speed had fled to New York and gotten involved in a sex crime that had taken place. Nothing like being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Speed had only been walking by, but he came across the rape and chased the guy. Later that same guy got his hands on Speed and took him hostage, torturing him and even shooting him in the leg. Now he was back at work again. Only a week had passed since he'd begun to work and they already noticed the major change in his personality and mood.

As Calleigh had said herself, Speed had become more withdrawn, more distance. He only spoke when he had to tell them something about the evidence he tested. He wasn't allowed back in the field as he was still slightly limping from the shot to his leg. He even still wore a light knee brace for the extra strength. Every night when shift ended he would gather his things from his locker and leave without saying anything to anyone. He never went out with them for drinks and dinner. He no longer wanted to hang out on the weekends.

Delko turned away from the door and began to head into the maze of the lab. It wasn't long before he ran into their red-haired boss, Horatio. The older man was looking over a sheet of paper. He was coming out of the DNA room and Delko could see Valera busily working away inside. "You look like you've lost your best friend, Eric. What's bothering you?"

"It's Speed, haven't you noticed that he's changed so much?" Delko pointed out, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Yes, I have. A lot of things have changed, though," Horatio offered him a smile.

No truer words had ever been spoken. As far as Delko knew, no one in the lab was aware that he and Horatio were still at the beginning of a budding relationship that went beyond the boss-employee standards. There was the new CSI that Horatio was forced to hire because of Speed's inability to work scenes anymore. Delko didn't mind having Ryan around but the new CSI probably made Speed feel even worse.

"He never should have sent them away, H," Delko said, shaking his head. "I bet he misses them. He just doesn't have the courage to call them up and say so."

"Perhaps you should call them," offered H as he looked at his young charge. "I have Mac's phone number in my office. I'll give him a ring later this afternoon. And I have the number for the crime lab out in Las Vegas, maybe I can get a hold of CSI Willows and take things from there. Meanwhile, I need you to take Calleigh and head over back to our crime scene. According to this"- he held up the piece of paper- "we may have missed something important to the case. I want this man behind bars for good this time."

"I hear you," Delko said as they parted company. As he went in search of his long last blond-haired Southern friend he hoped that Horatio was able to get somewhere with Mac and Willows. They had to do something to make Speed feel better before he went off the deep end again. They had to do something to get the old Speed back. They just had to. He couldn't take the silent days. He missed his best friend. He wanted to talk to him about Horatio, about how life was changing. But how could he when he couldn't even get the sullen man to say 'hello' in the morning?

Calleigh was right where he expected to find her, in the gun vault. Ryan was with her and she was explaining something about guns to him. He knocked on the doorframe to alert them to his presence before he walked into the room. "We've got work to do, Cal," he told her, nodding a greeting to Ryan. "And I do believe that Horatio is going to want you up in the lab working Trace."

Ryan frowned. "With Speed? Why can't I go out with Calleigh and you stay behind to work Trace? It's a bit creepy working with someone who won't talk. I've heard all the stories and I know he's a great investigator but man needs to get some help."

"We're working on it," Delko retorted, his voice taking on an edge. He didn't like anyone attacking Speed, who, even despite his problems, was his best friend. "Let's go. I think it might get a bit stormy out later today and I don't really feel up to taking another shower today."

They left Ryan behind in the gun vault and gathered their things. They passed Speed in the reception area. He was looking over a piece of paper, no doubt it was a message left for him. He was leaning up against one of the walls to take the pressure of his leg. Delko knew that he'd told Horatio it didn't hurt anymore but none of them really believed him. They could tell. They knew him well enough to know when he was in physical and emotional pain.

"Morning man," Delko said as they waited for the elevator. Speed looked at him, at least acknowledging the fact that he was there but he didn't say anything in reply. It had been like that all week. When was it going to end?