Disclaimer: I, obviously, do not own Grand Theft Auto or Rockstar or anything associated with it.

Author's Note: These characters, Fed and Saint Mary are owned by myself and my friend, Danielle Blaner, respectively. Enough of my hemming and hawwing. Enjoy!

Los Santos was a unique place. Everything the heart, mind, body or soul could want, could be found here, along with thing that no one should ever want. The rich and the poor, the famous and forgotten, the beautiful and the hideous, every single one of them and a thousand copies were all over the city, and if the new metro and construction projects were anything to go by it would remain that way for a long time to come.

Currently, down at the Del Porro Pier a few of those elements were clashing. The tourists, the ones who didn't know about, or chose to ignore, the criminal underbelly of the city were scoffing that these two people were allowing a disagreement to soil another beautiful day in paradise and the few who knew who these people were, were no doubt, waiting for the inevitable explosion of sex or violence.

"It's bullshit Fed!" the woman screamed. She was stunningly beautiful, dirty blonde hair, falling into emerald green eyes, eyes that were currently on fire. She was dressed in a bikini top and daisy duke jean shorts and sandals, all very high end and expensive. She was tanned enough that her skin looked copper and the lack of tan lines made it clear that she was not always the most wholesome when doing so. She also was built enough to know that she can handle herself but not overly so. Her name was Alyssa Hart, but everyone called her Saint Mary.

"You can't see the big picture!" he counterpart yelled back at her."You can't see ANY PICTURE!" He was a tall man, dark black hair, cut nice and short, far from his blue-grey eyes. He was clean shaven, showing a strong jaw and a strong body, glamour muscles and the rest large and toned. He was wearing white swimming trunks and a white linen shirt, un-buttoned, but enough chest showing to reveal a tattoo of a hand of playing cards, wreathed in flames. His name was James Locke, but everyone called him Fed.

"I am talking about something primal!" she shouted back. "Savagery! Brutal animal instincts!"

"And that wins out every time with you? You know the human race has evolved Mary!"

"Oh! Evolved into a bunch of nanmby pamby pussies! They could never withstand my pure aggressors" At this point the two started shouting over one another.

"We're smarter now,we're stronger,plus there's this little thing called team work! Not to mention the superstitious terrors of your 'pure agressors'!"

"You just want it to be about what you want!"

"IT'S NOT ABOUT WHAT I WANT!"

Neither of the duo quite knew what they were going to do next. They had had heated arguments before and either fists started flying or clothing did. Before anything could though Love Fists's "Fist Fury" came out of Fed's pants. Saint Mary's face immediately went from anger to disappointment as Fed's went to annoyance. He reached into his trunk pockets and pulled out his phone, answering it and taking a few steps to the side.

"Lester?" he said into his phone, a smile growing on his face. "It's ready?" His smile grew wider as his gaze turned his companion. "Oh yeah, I have a partner in mind. Send me the details and I'll take care of everything."

"Fed..." said Mary looking at him with apprehension. "Now, I know you're not going to drag me away from the beach on a day like toda-"

"$147,560." he interrupted, looking at her. "Each."

A smile even wide than his appeared on her face and a slight flush went into her cheeks. "Well why didn't you say so?" she asked, turning her back on him and sashaying over to his car. "You coming?" she called back.

Half an hour later, Mary's initial excitement had waned some. She was seated on the leather sofa in Fed's media room, but, for the first time she felt cramped in there. Fed usually kept all of his equipment in a boxcar at a decommissioned rail house but it seemed that the entire contents had been moved here, and, for the past ten minutes, he had been nursing a drink and staring at the board. It was a blueprint of a Fleeca bank franchise located in Chumash, and a number of hi-res images taken from the various security cameras in the main room and in the vault. It was only when Mary sighed for about the twentieth time that Fed, finally, paid her any mind.

"What?" he said turning to look at her, setting his drink down. "What is it?"

"I'm bored." she said. "You said you had a score to take and unless someone is going to come in that door with upwards of $300,000 for us, I don't see us getting anything, anytime soon." He fixed her with a look that said 'You really have no idea how to do this kind of thing do you?'

"You really have no idea how to do this kind of thing do you?" he asked. He walked over to the map of Los Santos he had and indicated a red thumbtack he had put in. "This is the bank we're hitting. It's a small little thing, barely more than a large ATM, mainly used to get money before hitting the beach,and maybe $900,000 in the vault on any given day."

"So why are we only taking a third of it?" she asked, sitting up. She might not have the same patience that Fed had, but she knew when to pay attention.

"Because we're not hitting the vault." he said, taking a red marker and drawing an X on the picture of the main vault. "We're hitting these." he said circling the picture of the safety deposit boxes room. "Specifically, box number 167." He spun around to face his compatriot. "Following me so far?" he asked.

"So we're hitting an oversized ATM, and rather than taking the vault, we're taking a metal box with a third of the cash in it?" she asked, confused. Fed closed his eyes and sighed.

"Yes..." he said. "But there's more too it than that." He pointed back to the pictures. "The vault is in cash." he began."And it's in small bills, we'd need another three people to carry it all out in one trip. But this." he said smacking the safety deposit box room picture. "Would take just me. And inside are $330,000 in illegal bearer bonds."

"Then," she asked. "Why are we each getting a hundred and forty-seven grand instead of..." she narrowed her eyes, thinking.

"Instead of one hundred and sixty-five?" he asked.

"Yes." she said crossing her arms. "Unless we're not doing a fifty fifty split."

"Lester..." he said, a little ashamed. "He turned me onto this score, and he wants the bonds, which he'll exchange for the cash value... minus his ten percent cut."

"So he wants 330,000 in bearer bonds because...?" she asked.

"I don't know." said Fed, truly puzzled about Lester's motivations himself. "But I try not to think about what that creep does with his spare time. The point is, by this time tomorrow,we're each going to be sitting on close to $150,000 and if I'm not mistaken that is ten times more than any other job we've ever run."

"So," Mary said. "We go to the bank and just kindly ask them to let us into the safety deposit box room and the right key?" Fed smiled.

"No, and this is the part you'll like." he said putting up a few more pictures. One was of the main room, and the three employee's that were always there, and the vault door. He pointed to the vault door picture first. "Lester provided me with a handy little hacking tool, that'll open the vault. I'll activate it as soon as we pull up. We burst in guns blazing!" Fed smile as her saw a little flush rise in Mary's cheeks and her legs rub together. "Like the sound of that?" he asked with a smirk.

"You do know how to get me going." she said with a little lip bite and smile. "So I take it I'm on crowd control?" she asked.

"Yes." he said, putting his hands up. "But we need the staff calmly subdued. No dropping bodies. Put holes in anything you want, just not them." Her face fell a little. "Mary," he said exasperated. "This is how a professional job goes." He smacked the board, almost knocking the board off the wall. "Planning, prep work and, if you can help it, no one dies."

"I didn't realize you had a problem with killing people Fed." she said,with more than a hint of sass.

"Two bit gangsters and Mexican drug dealers? None. Private military assholes? Even less." He smacked the picture of the staff. "Joe Schmo though... I'd have a problem with." Mary frowned and stood up.

"So," Mary said, rising to her feet. "We roll up to the bank, we make our scary faces and then?"

"You make your scary face," he said, walking over to a box full of gear. "I deal with this." Fed pulled out and showed his prize, an industrial drill. "Safety deposit boxes are almost half impossible to pick and we'll never find the key in time, so we're bringing our own. You subdue the crowd, I drill into the box and we get out of there before anyone knows what's happening."

"Okay," Saint Mary said, looking over the plan. Fed was a little insulted that his plan was being inspected by someone who was, essentially, a hired gun. He liked Saint Mary well enough and if she ever became a one man kind of woman he might even go after her, but this was HIS job, HIS plan and these were the things he was good at. "Tell me about the getaway." Fed smiled.

"Good eye." he said putting up two more pictures. One was of a car covered in armor plating, the other was of a Cargobob helicopter. "Given the location of this place," he explained. "Right on the highway, we'd have a long straight stretch to get up to high speeds, heading towards Blaine County or back into Los Santos. Unfortunately that also means we'll have the LSPD and the Blaine County Sheriff's Department to deal with. We'll never outrun them all. We could try getting away by water, but getting a boat and making sure it was where we need it to be, would cost us a little more than we're robbing. No, the only safe way is in the air. We take this," he said indicating the armored car. "It has four inch steel plating over most of it and bulletproof tires, more than enough to stand up to a few road blocks and tire spikes. This is the risky part, we can't slow down, we can't let up, until here." he said pointing back at the larger map of Los Santos. "The bridge, the real dividing line between Los Santos and the rest of San Andres. There, Eddie Toh, a contact of Lester's will be waiting in a Cargobob helicopter. He'll have a magnet attached to the thing, and by the time the LSPD gets an air unit mobilized, we'll be long gone!" Fed spun around again and raised his hand, almost in a Nazi salute but with a fist and then opened his hand."Drops mic on stage." he said."What do you think?"

Saint Mary stood up and looked over everything as best she could. "When are we going?" she asked, a smirk on her face, and Fed could almost see the dollar signs in her emerald green eyes.

"As soon as we suit up." Fed answered, tossing her a small backpack with her outfit in it. Inside was almost the same ensemble that she wore when she went on jobs with Fed. Black combat boots, black leather pants, a tight black tee, a plain black leather jacket and, resting on top, was a set of black leather gloves and a black balaclava. Saint Mary looked at it all and slowly frowned.

"I haven't been this disappointed since The Mad Hatter and I had sex..."

"Didn't need to know that." Fed said, already heading out of the room with his own backpack of gear.

Twenty minutes later the duo were dressed to match,black leather outfits, Mary's maybe a few sizes too small, black gloves and black masks as they tore down the streets of Los Santos in a car that screamed 'probable cause' in any city other than Los Santos as they made there way to the Fleeca Bank. Mary was driving, while Fed was riding shotgun and, true to the old Western saying, working with a shotgun. "32 rounds." he said fixing the extended clip into place."That's 32 shots before you need to let up off the trigger. There's four cameras in there, so you'll have 28 left once you take those out to keep the witnesses scared and on the ground."

"Sacred and on the ground." said Mary again, contempt clear in her voice. "Fed, I don't do well with not filling a room with bodies."

Fed clicked the gun and spun the chamber. "You drop anyone and this entire job goes through, we don't get the money and you'd be fucking lucky if all that happens is we wind up serving 25to Life in Boilingbroke because they'll slap us with murder, manslaughter, attempted robbery, probably resisting arrest and I'm rather certain half the stuff we have stuffed in the trunk is illegal for even the military to have."

"Fine, I promise I won't kill anyone who isn't asking for it."

Fed punched the dashboard and immediately regretted it sine the interior, was armor plated too. "Damnit Mary, no killing! What part of that is giving you so much trouble?" he asked, exasperated as they turned onto the Great Ocean Highway. Things were about to come to a head and it seemed like his accomplice was still unclear on the concept of white collar crime. "No one is going to be asking for it, no one is going to be giving any imagined slights, and, if anyone looks like they're going to try and be a hero, shoot AROUND them and ask they which one of their eyes they like best. Is that clear? Please, Alyssa. Is. That. Clear."

At the mention of Alyssa, Mary nearly slammed on the break. Even though the duo knew one anothers real names and not just their alias, they very rarely used them, but she, and everyone else who was in their tight little group, knew that if they were used, the situation was serious. She looked over at Fed and sighed. "James..." she said, using his real name. "You know me, I get a little excited but I can keep my cool... and I trust you. If you say no one dies, then no one dies. I promise."

Fed smiled and nodded. "Good." he said, double checking the ammo cartridge on the shotgun. "Pull up right alongside the bank, get as perpendicular with the doors as you can. Close enough to it, but far enough from the road that you won't disrupt traffic. We're gonna wanna move quick after this. Lester gave us a good window with his security hack, but..." he let his words hang in the air,as the car began slowing down.

"We expecting some local resistance?" she asked, a rather disturbing glimmer of hope in her voice.

"Which is why we have a car with four inch armor plating and bulletproof tires." he said as the car came to final halt in front of their target. "Last chance to back down." he said offering the shotgun. Mary took one good look at the bank before grabbing it by the hilt

"Not on your life." she said stepping out of the car, the gun held close to hide it from the road. Fed followed, duffle bag slung over one shoulder, drill warmed up and his prized possession, a gold plated pistol tucked into his waistband. He got out, pulled up his cell phone and ran the program Lester gave him, switching his view to the security camera footage and saw the vault swing open. He took a deep breath, slid down his mask and kicked the door in.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!" he shouted, two shots from his pistol putting holes in the ceiling and damaging the hearing of everyone in the room. "THIS IS YOUR MOMENT! PLEASE DON'T MAKE MY ASSOCIATE RUIN ALL THE FINE WORK YOUR PLASTIC SURGEONS HAVE BEEN DOING! DOWN ON THE GROUND NOW!"

"WELL?!" Mary screamed, her shotgun making mincemeat out of the security camera and ceiling tile as the bowels of the customers and few tourists getting cash before hitting the beach turned to water, "YOU HEARD THE MAN! GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND OR I WILL PAINT THE FUCKING WALLS WITH YOUR BLOOD!"

Despite his reservations about Mary's nigh-uncontrollable violence, Fed had to smile as he heard her yell at the patron's accompanied by blasts of her shotgun. It was muffled by the time he got in the vault, but he could still hear the profanities and blasts of buckshot roaring through the place. If no one outside was calling the cops yet, he'd be very surprised. He tuned it out the best he could yet and started the drill,clicking on his headset. "Everything going on well out there dear?" he asked,pressing the drill bit into the box's key hole.

"I SAID STAY ON THE FUCKING GROUND! THIS ISN'T A GOD DAMN MOVIE, HERO'S DON'T FUCKING LIVE!" Four blasts later he heard her voice."Why yes, darling. Julia out here though thought it would be a smart idea to reach for her cell phone. I'm convincing her that she should leave the shattered heap of metal and glass alone unless she wants her face to look the same way. I SAID NOBODY FUCKING MOVE!" and the headset clicked it off.

"I guess that answers that..." he said to himself. He pressed the drill in harder, making sure not to over heat the metal, getting the drill stuck in the lock and having to book it without a score would seriously ruin his day. He tuned out, as best he could, Mary's profanity, which had shifted from making sure everyone stayed on the ground to how hard she was going to get laid on a big pile of their money to taking one of the guys into the vault and making him walk sideways for the rest of his life, after she used all of his up and down. It took a while, but not too long, before the drill started shaking. Drills did that whenever they hit a void and a smile grew on Fed's face from under his balaclava. He wrenched the drill out and the door to the safety deposit box came open. "Come to Daddy." he said taking it out and stowing it and the drill into the bag, and almost on cue, the alarm went off."THAT'S OUR CUE!" he shouted hoping Mary heard, sprinting back into the main room. He almost slipped as he came into the main room from all the spent shells on the ground. "GO!" he yelled at Mary waving at the door. "GO GO GO GO GO!" he yelled as she nodded and screamed out of the door, shooting back into the building a few times for good measure, before sliding on her ass over the hood of the car and got in. Once the duo was in the car she put the pedal to the ground and tore out over the road.

"Did you get it?" she asked, the faint sounds of sirens finally coming. Fed shook the bag, the sounds of the box and the drill knocking into one another.

"No, I just decided to play with a drill and then come screaming out of the room!"

"Shut up!"

"Just keep us on the road!" Fed yelled half climbing into the backseat, securing the second duffle he already had in the car, filled with his weapons of choice, coming back up with a P-90 sub machine gun. "Those roadblocks!" he shouted pointing out the windshield. "Just ram them head on at the break between cars and keep the speed up,we gotta hit the bridge as quick as we can or the whole job was for nothing!" He couldn't lean out the window of the car but he held his arm out and unloaded the clips of his gun into the cars and cops screaming in at them. Busted tires, busted skulls and busted cop car windshields filled the two's lives for the next couple,soul cleaving minutes,until, finally, the bridge was reached, and like an angel from heaven, Eddie Toh and his helicopter appeared, and there wasn't a police chopper anywhere near them.

"Slow up!" Fed yelled at Mary. "Slow up, he needs to grab us!" He pulled a belt out of his bag, with about half a dozen grenades on it. He pulled one pin and threw the whole thing out the window. He got back inside,right before they were shot into the sky as Eddie's magnet scooped them up.

"Mary..." Fed said after they were deep in the Mount Chiliad wilderness. "Alyssa..."

"Yeah James?" she said, both of them panting, not realizing just how tired they were.

"I think we just robbed a bank."

It took more than a little while for Fed to, take a breath, as it were. He was on edge the entire time Eddie was flying them to the airstrip owned by... well Fed was never sure if it was Trevor Phillips Industries, Enterprises or Incorporated... the entire time they drove back to the city and dropped the bonds off to Lester and got their money and when Mary dragged him to a bar. It was finally,when he had a drink in him and the bass slamming so loud he could barely hear himself think, that he was finally back.

"We are good!" he had to shout over the DJ so Saint Mary could hear him,despite the fact that they were almost inside each other. Fed was in a more casual outfit that he usually wore. Black button down shirt,no tie,a pair of oliver cargo pants and sneakers. Mary was in the tiny black dres every woman seemed to be issued the day she either turns 18 or her father dies and the view she wasgiving the bartender was probably why he didn't seem to mind when she bent over the bar and grabbed a bottle of vodka and two glasses. She poured one for herself and one fore Fed, passing his to him.

"Yes we are!" she said taking a swig a girl her size shouldn't be able to handle. "We are very very good!" Fed grabbed the bottle and drug Mary over to a table in front of the kareoke machine and started looking through the book when Mary brought up. "So what're you gonna do with your cut?"

Fed looked up at her, flicking back into Business Fed for a moment."I have another job in the works actually, and there's a part for you in it, and it'll pay more, and be more fun than this was... but in the short term?" he said standing up on the bar. "FOR THE NEXT HOUR!" he shouted. "THE DRINKS ARE ON ME!"A cheer went up from the crowd, glasses and bottles raised high, and he motioned for quiet."AND YOU!" he shouted, pointing at the karaoke machine operator. " TRACK 908!" Fed hopped down from the bar with a wicked grin, dropped a cool three grand on the bar to handle the rush of drink orders and then grabbed Saint Mary by the wrist, despite her protests, and dragged her up on the stage with him, as Love Fist's cover of "Cum On Feel The Noize" started playing. He gave Saint Mary a toothy grin and as soon as the lyrics started.

"CUM ON FEEL THE NO-OISE!" he shouted, singing as best he could.

"GIRLS ROCK YOUR BOYS!" Mary roaredright along with him.

"WE GET WILD WILD WILD!"