Alright. I know I deleted the story, 'Karuta?orTaichi?' But let's face it, even the title was stupid. I had given up on trying to write for them because I just couldn't make up my own story for the two. It felt as though I was disrespecting Taichi and I hated that. I didn't want to accidentally change his character.
But then I saw the movie.
For all those who haven't watched it, go now. Its perfect. The cast was brilliant. Komano and Nishida looked a little different but they nailed Harada sensei, Miyauchi sensei , Kana-chan and Sudou and Retro-kun! Shinobu was perfect as well, although she wasn't a part of this movie...she's in the trailers. It may not have as much character development as the manga. But for all those who want a perfect but crisp idea of Chihaya, Taichi and Arata, watch the movie, please.
Arata's actor, Mackenyu, was amazing. He looked good in that role, played the character well. I liked the smile.
Chihaya's impersonator, Hirose Suzu, was spot on. You won't believe how wonderfully in character she was! From the way she tackles Taichi to her falling asleep after a match, and the silly happiness and earnest Karuta, it was brilliant! Perfect! Except, her hair was black instead of brown but, minor problem.
And finally, Nomura Shuhei. He nearly killed me. Having a huge crush on an inanimate character is tough let me tell you. And I always had the feeling that I couldn't completely understand Taichi's character because he was, well, not real at all, was he? But here, in the movie, watching him come alive through Nomura-san , I really fell in love with the entire thing. In an instant, and perfectly strategized dialogues, Shuhei perfectly delivered to me, and countless others, the imaginary person I wanted so badly to understand because believe it or not, we have a few things in common ( I don't look anything even remotely as good as him, though.). And seeing that, seeing an actor capture him so perfectly ( or as perfect as you can get...I mean, there might be many mistakes I haven't caught), which was something I was sceptical about when I saw just the trailer, I found the strength and desire to write again. Because I finally had an idea about him.
And so I continued where I left off.
Unfortunately, I lost the old story manuscript and files. So this is just a continuation. I know many of you might be confused as to what happened, but just leave me a message if you have any doubts.
I just have to get this out of my head.
Warning: This is a fanfiction. Karuta isn't the only thing going on here. Taichi might seem very OOC to you but this is the way I understood him. Other members of the family will be active and OOC as well. But I can't help it. In my previous story too, I had intended for Rika to be a bigger character, for those siblings to come closer. Same with Chitose.
Now on to the story. Thanks for the previous support which I hope will sustain. A review would be nice...I want to know if I should continue.
Disclaimer: I don't own Chihayafuru.
"What do you mean, 'I'm going away'?"
"It means I'm going away,"
"Onii-chan!" Rika glared at her brother from under her bangs,"where are you going? Why? For how long?"
Taichi pressed his lips together as he thought his answer through. It was bad enough that he was being forced into this 'going away' without his consent but now, he had to be the one to tell his sister about it. And she was not happy. When Rika Mashima isn't happy, the world just doesn't turn anymore.
"Onii-chan…"
Her low growl startled him for a second and he hastened to give her the answers she wanted.
"I'm going to London, Rika." He sighed, "Dad's asking me to join a med school there, you know, that huge one with a great rep or whatever. I'm not enrolling there just yet," he added quickly, seeing her alarmed expression. "There's just this crash course for… um… kids with good grades –"
"You mean brilliant minds…"
"Good grades." He said firmly," and it's two and a half months long… so... er…"
"So," Rika couldn't keep the tremor out of her angry voice, "you're going to attend that thing and fall absolutely in love with that place and that stupid college and go away for a whole 4 years of medical training, leaving everything you have here behind!?"
"Hey! For the record, the college is most definitely not stupid. It's one of the most prestigious institutions inthe…world….?"
His voice died as he noticed his sister's face growing increasingly flushed and red. She looked ready to kill someone. Whether it was their father or him, Taichi didn't know.
Rika felt her heart breaking. So that was it? He was just going to go away to some stupid college and leave them all behind? Her rational mind told her that it was probably a once in a lifetime opportunity that her brother had just received, but what about his life here? As much as she was reluctant to admit it, what would she do without him here? It wasn't as if they were the closest siblings on earth but still, the thought of him going away clogged up her throat pretty well. That had to count for something right?
"Rika? Listen, I'm not sure I'm going to join there, if that's what you're thinking." He plopped down onto her bed, feeling drained somehow, "I'm just trying it out, to make dad happy. It's not like I want to go away for good."
"But you're thinking about it aren't you?"
Taichi didn't answer. He couldn't. Of course he was thinking about it. This was a huge chance, a rare opportunity. And although he knew that Tokyo University was only just a step behind London, he felt like it would be better to get away from his native for a while, even if that meant for 4 years. He could use a break; maybe get to move on…
Yeah, right.
Now don't get him wrong, Chihaya wasn't the reason he was going away at all. If anything, she was the anchor that still tied him to this place. But with imminent arrival of Arata to Tokyo and the turn that their relationship would take after that, well, let's just say, the anchor's rope is on fire right now.
He deserved a break. A self respecting man would've stayed far away from this scene that was his life. But often, Taichi found that taking a break was synonymous with running away. And that posed a problem.
A pretty big freaking problem.
His attention snapped to Rika as she began to talk again. "Have you… told your friends about it….?"
Her voice trailed off and she watched him carefully, noting the way his eyes tightened and breath hitched ever so slightly, and she knew he hadn't even before he answered her the same thing.
"Not just yet…"
"Chihaya-chan's going to flip."
Taichi chewed the inside of his cheek at that. He hadn't quite figured that part out yet, how his friends were going to react to the news… Chihaya would probably be mad at him for giving up Karuta again.
"Yeah…well…she's just going to have to deal with it."
Rika winced at his bleak voice. It was obvious he was being torn apart by the whole ordeal… and what was with the nonchalant attitude towards Chihaya? It hurt him to go away and that was as obvious as daylight. Rika wanted, so much, to know what was happening to the two of them but she also knew that this wasn't the right time. But again, was this really the right thing to do? If he was going away from here, that meant he would lose any chance he ever had with that girl. And that can't be good, right? Taichi got up and left, Rika bounded after him.
"So when do you leave?"
"Right after the Meijin and queen tournaments."
Rika slowed. That was soon. Pretty soon. Taichi spun around midway through the stairs and smiled at his little sister. She stopped, uncertainly.
"Listen." He placed a hand on her head, patting like he would a puppy, "It's just a silly crash course. There's no guarantee that I'm going to go away for good. Let's just give that poor college a chance to charm me, yeah?"
The girl managed a weak smile at his attempt to lighten things up; she sighed as he walked away, heading to school. This was going to be long and hard to face. Her gut told her that going to London was not what's best for her brother. And so she prayed, furiously, that he'd hate the college as much as he hates Disney movies. And that was a LOT, unfortunately.
Mizusawa High was in full swing by the time Taichi reached there with Chihaya. Not that they were late, but things started to get active around there earlier than usual as the school festival approached. Chihaya was rapidly craning her neck all around, trying to take in everything that was going on. "WOW! It looks like it's going to be a blast this year, ne?"
"Uh-huh."
"Maybe we should do something too."
He raised a brow at her,"Like what? A Karuta demonstration for whoever is willing to watch?"
A blush bloomed on her cheeks and she bit her lip. Taichi looked away, swallowing. He'd better keep his mouth shut if that was the response he was going to get. Get a grip on yourself, boy.
"I was going to suggest a traditional café or something." Chihaya managed to get rid of the redness in her face, and her companion exhaled, "But a demo seems like a good idea…"
He gave her an exasperated look. "Seriously, Chihaya? That's the worst idea ever. Do you really think people are gonna stand around and watch us flicking cards away when there's so much to do and see?"
She turned on him and gave him a nasty look, "It's not just flicking cards away, Taichi! How can you say that?! Its –"
"I know what it is." He cut her off,"I know what it means to you, to us. But it's not necessary people will see it that way. Face it Chihaya, they'll be bored, uninterested. Not many people understand the value of Karuta easily," He added quickly, seeing her expression, "you need to have a passion for the game to endure it. And you know this."
After a few minutes of silently pouting and glaring at him, she sighed. "I guess we'll have to do the café, huh?"
"Not really." Taichi adjusted shifted his bag to his other hand and let his eyes roam around the ground," Lets discuss this with everyone else and then come to a decision. Running a café isn't easy. Besides, wouldn't you rather just enjoy the day with your friends?"
She appeared to be in deep thought. "I think you're right… maybe."
He sighed in relief. The last thing he wanted to do was another demonstration. "Let's go now, shall we? The bell's ringing in five."
They walked to their classes together, not really talking much. Taichi's mind, which had been successfully distracted until a few moments ago, returned to his sister's question. He still hadn't told his friends about London. Chihaya didn't know. How would they react? What would they say? Tons of scenarios floated in his head and each one worse that the last. He nearly groaned.
Throughout his lessons, whenever he allowed his mind to slip, Taichi kept thinking about what to do. Would it be better to tell them now or save it for later? But there was a chance they'd be mad at him if he told them only at the last minute. So…now? But...to everyone? At the thought of revealing this to Chihaya, his chest constricted painfully again. It would be impossible to tell her. Because telling her would mean he accepted the reality of the situation, that he really was going away; away from her, away from them all. And was that what he wanted? It all sounded so simple in his head. He'd go off to London once Chihaya won the tournament and Arata became Meijin. He'd stay there for two months of training and then come back just to pack his bags permanently. If he didn't get over her within those months, (which was highly unlikely…) he'd just use those four years of med school to do it. By then, hopefully, those two would be married or something and he'd have gotten her out of his mind completely.
The only problem was, he feared the roots of his feelings ran a even deeper than he believed it to. And that scared him.
As he walked into the clubroom that evening, he found himself realizing that he needed to let someone know. At least one of his friends deserved to find out. And even before he pondered over who it would be, his answer arrived in the form of a very gentle brown haired girl, who was smiling at him quite pleasantly from near the club room door.
"Buchou! Good evening! I was hoping to catch you before the others arrived."
"Yeah?"Taichi's voice was bleak as he slid the door open and ushered her in before following, "That's funny, because…" he set his bag down and ran a hand through his hair, taking a deep breath. Okay, this is it. "…because I have something to tell you as well."
Kana chan took a seat, looking mildly confused. Why was he looking so ruffled? Momentarily, a pinch of panic gripped her heart. Their president was never this shaken up. Not once had she seen him like this. She bit her lip as he sat down too, fixing her with a determined gaze and suddenly she was reminded of Chihaya. They both had the same look in their eyes, a similar flame of determination. It was slightly unnerving.
"You go first." Taichi offered, leaning forward, "What did you want to see me for?"
Kana chan had been phrasing her words ever since he and Chihaya landed back in the club in a whirlwind of apologies and made up excuses. But in his presence, right now, she couldn't put her thoughts into carefully calculated sentences and ended up blurting out instead, "What happened between you and Chihaya-Chan?"
Taichi recoiled as if he'd been punched, it felt that way to him anyway, and Kana chan hastened to make amends. "I'm sorry Buchou! That came out wrong! I didn't mean to be so crude! I just…wanted to know…if…well, if something's happened." She caught sight of his still stunned expression and quickly added, "You don't have to tell me anything if you don't feel like it! But things between you and her have been so different even if it looks okay from outside…"
Taichi blinked. And then steadied himself. That was quite a blunt question. "No, it's alright. I was just caught off guard, that's all. You deserve to know anyway. "
"I told the moron how I felt. And I got an instant rejection." The ghost of a smile danced on his lips and Kana chan noted the mask he was putting up. He was trying to downplay the whole thing but his eyes betrayed him and she felt her heart squeeze painfully. "That's what happened anyway. I needed a break so I quit…which was pretty stupid on my part, I think. But I needed it then. And I don't know what happened to her, other than what the boys filled me in on. " He took another breath, and to his surprise, it wasn't a shaky one. "I saw her in the street one day and ended up walking her home and somewhere along the way, she convinced me to come back. But trust me," he said, seeing Kana chan's alarmed expression, "I came back because I wanted to. I missed playing, I missed you guys." He leaned back and grinned at her playfully, "believe it or not, my entire life doesn't revolve around her alone. I have other priorities."
Kana chan swallowed, and blinked, letting the information sink in. It was kind of unexpected. She was suddenly quite frustrated at Chihaya. How long would she take to realize what she felt? She and Sumire chan had been closely watching their captain. And even if Taichi didn't see it, they could. It was quite plain to someone with the right pair of eyes. They had grinned wickedly and squealed happily inside their heads whenever they caught Chihaya in the act. That girl was definitely showing some changes. She blushed a lot around him. She looked at him a lot more, and sometimes, forgot to breathe; personally, that was their favorite part. She freaking glowed when he was nearby!
But then again, Chihaya probably didn't weigh her reactions and her behavior. She probably didn't give them a second thought.
And that's where the problem lies.
Kana chan sighed and looked at their now smiling president with, not pity, but a look that was exasperated. "I'm sorry Buchou. We had no idea. But you know what; she probably didn't even think it through properly. Maybe –"
"She didn't have to." Taichi shook his head,"If you already have a clear picture of what you want in your mind, why would you even give a second thought to other options?"
Kana chan understood the insinuation perfectly. And she suddenly glared at him, "Why are you smiling?"
"Because I'm tired of looking like a kicked puppy every time this topic comes up. It gets old."
Kanade opened her mouth to retort but Taichi cut her off."Listen, there's something I have to tell you, before the others come in."
She backed off seeing the sudden serious look on his face. His tense posture and nervous glances left her jittery. "Right. I nearly forgot. Go on, Buchou."
"I'm not… I won't be attending Todai after high school"
She blinked confusedly, "Why not? Which other college will you go to? Todai is the best there is in Japan right? And –"
"I would've attended Todai if I was staying in Japan." Taichi cut her off. His tone was mixed with urgency and a plea for her to understand, "But I'm not. I have to go to London."
Kana chan gasped. And he flinched. "Why?!"
"My dad…he wants me to go." Taichi chewed his lip ,"There's this really great college in London which is like the best place to go. He's signed me up for a two-three month crash course which starts right after the Meijin and Queen tournaments. It's a chance for me to, you know, take in the surroundings and whatever. "
Kana chan felt it then. That sweeping sadness that blows you away and leaves you cold; that very feeling which comes when you're about to lose a friend. She felt her eyes sting with unshed tears.
Taichi shifted a little closer to her, and patted her arm. He wasn't expecting her to tear up already. Suddenly, he felt it too. He didn't want to go away from his friends. If you take Chihaya out of the equation, he knew it would be tough for him to make a decision to go away because he'd miss his friends that much.
The brown haired girl rubbed her eyes and offered him a sad smile. He expected her to tell him to stay, stay and fight for Chihaya or something. But instead, she surprised him. "It's quite an opportunity isn't it? You should go then, if that's what you want. " she sniffed slightly," We'll miss you. I'll miss you terribly, Buchou. But you shouldn't let that get in your way. I know it's going to be a chance for you to get over her. But,"
She stood up, and there was such confidence in her eyes that Taichi half believed her for a second. "...you just wait and watch. Things are going to come around your way. All I ask is that you don't agree to join that college right now. Just wait for a little while longer."
"I-I'm not enrolling there right away. Don't worry. I just decided to give you a heads up, you know…"
Kana chan went over to get their cards and tape. She turned her back to him and fiddled with the cards, still slightly upset about the whole thing but not just about to show it to him. A thought struck her and she asked him without looking back, "Who else knows?"
"Uh… no one?"
"What?" Kana chan turned around sharply, still clutching the cards. "You haven't told Chi chan yet?"
"Yeeeeah…No. " he rubbed the back of his neck, "I'd rather not. I mean she has the Queen tournament coming up and she can't afford to get distracted by anything."
"And you said you have other priorities…" Kana Chan's mouth twitched into a smirk at his flushed face.
"Of course I do! That's not the point." Taichi got up and went over to help her with setting up the tape. "I'd appreciate it if you'd tell the others what I just told you…but leave Chihaya out of this? I'll tell her myself after the tournament."
"Why then? Why not now, Buchou? That would give her more time to absorb the news right?"
Taichi sighed involuntarily. "It's not that…"
"Then what is it?"
He took another breath and pressed play on their makeshift stereo; the starting poem floated in the air. "Well… after the tournament," he fixed his eyes on the tape in front of him," I have a cushion flying in permanently from Fukui that'll lessen the blow… and distract her enough."
Unfortunately, Kana chan knew which cushion he was talking about. Her voice took and unnatural frosty lining as she spoke ,"Well, You really have thought of everything haven't you?"
Taichi didn't answer her.
They worked in silence for the next few minutes. Kana Chan's mind was reeling. The Meijin and queen tournaments were going to be the hardest time for Taichi. She knew it. Firstly he was going off to London; second, Arata was going to be staying at Tokyo for the rest of his life by the looks of it. And the cherry on top, she thought with a sad and bitter taste in her mouth, was that he was going to help Arata get what he wanted.
Why else would he have used the word 'distract'?
"Okay, who's the president of America?"
"Um... Abraham Lincoln?"
"What? NO. What's the capital of Korea?"
"Er… Gangnam? "
"Chihaya, No. It's Seoul." Taichi snapped the book shut and handed it back to her. "You're not concentrating enough."
Frustration bubbled in the girl's stomach. Of course she knew the Capital of South Korea was Seoul. She was trying to concentrate on her answers but then he just had to wear that blue shirt and look like a bloody supermodel. It was so distracting she had to repeatedly remind herself not to stare at him every time his eyes lowered to the book in his hand. And once she looked, it was super tough to tear her eyes away. Lately, it had started becoming all the more difficult and it bothered her because she couldn't find out why.
She thought back to their Tokyo prelims. They'd won their matches and made their way to the nationals. Arata had too. The final winner however, turned out to be Hokuo Academy. In the end, they were competing for third place with Arata and his team. She was, finally, facing off with Arata. She wanted so badly to be able to beat him. And when she swept the first few cards away from him, she'd felt euphoric. Taichi was sitting right next to her, playing his usual role as president exceptionally well that day. It was as if neither of them wanted to lose to Arata. For different reasons, of course, though she didn't know that. She was nervous, and terrified of playing him. She needed to win. And if she lost, she didn't know how it would affect her.
Taichi had been watching her game, she knew. He was watching very closely. When she had managed to snag the first card from her opponent, he had grinned a little, their eyes met for a fleeting second and she saw pride in them and that was all she needed to plough through. Her heart had been beating like helicopter blades and her face was burning. She knew she sported a smile on her face. And her conviction to get more cards from Arata burned stronger, if it meant she could see that smile again from that one person sitting right next to her.
But she'd lost. Somewhere along the way, Arata played like a maniac, defeating her completely. They won their match but she lost hers. They'd celebrated at a café nearby, happy to have gotten the third position.
And no one noticed her false enthusiasm except him. He was the one who offered to help her look for the shirt she had supposedly left behind in their temporary quarters. And he was the one, who listened to her and held her and patted her head as she burst into tears in that small room, the one who bought her ice cream on the way back to their friends to cheer her up and also the reason her heart was beating out of control and doing gymnastics of such complexity, she didn't think those moves existed.
And what with the fluttering in her stomach and the heaviness in her chest that came from interacting with him, she was confused and disoriented. But happy. SO very happy.
"If you think you can make it out of La-La land, call me." Taichi got up to leave, shaking his head exasperatedly. Chihaya pulled him back down. He was looking at her intently from their cross legged perch on the floor, arms crossed, eyebrows raised, and she did have a difficult time focusing. Again.
"Why aren't you concentrating?"
The frustration that had been bubbling up in her stomach now travelled up to her chest. She was trying, honestly trying. But really, what could she do?
"Y-You're distracting me!"
"Oh am I?" his eyebrows nearly disappeared into his hair. "What am I doing? A tap dance?"
Her cheeks felt hot and she was sure her face was red. What was she supposed to say to him? Ne, Taichi, I can't concentrate because you look too good. Can you put on something like a potato sack…?
Yeah, No.
Her silence bothered him and he shookhis head. "Your head looks like a tomato, Chihaya. You obviously have other things on your mind. Come and call me when you're ready to pick this up. "
He successfully got up this time, she was still silent. Taichi needed to leave. It was never a good sign when she was looking like that. Because in Chihaya-land, Blushing = Arata. And he didn't want to deal with that. Nope. No way.
The sound of his footsteps jerked her out of her thoughts and Chihaya scrambled back towards him, tugging on his jeans. "I'm sorry! I'm Sorry okay?! I promise to do better this time. Please? ONE more chance, Taichi. Come on. "
He chewed his cheek and contemplated it. Or at least tried to, because when she tugged at his jeans again, and blinked up innocently at him, his resolve broke. And he returned to his seat, cursing his weakness.
"Fine! But this last chance, Ayase, and then I'm done."
She nodded eagerly, patting the space in front of her with that innocent smile on her face. Taichi sat down and picked up the book with a sigh. .
"Alright, so... What's the name of—what are you doing?"
" Closing my eyes."
"Okay, why?"
"Concentration." She crossed her arms so completely missed his bemused blinking. "Go on. I'm ready."
"Whatever you say." He muttered, confused, and then proceeded to scan the page for an apt question.
Chihaya felt a smugness inside her as she answered the first ten or so questions that he asked and she could feel him relax, even hear his smile in his voice, and she strained a little to catch the amusement lingering in the smooth timbre.
And that's where things went wrong again.
She messed up pathetically. One second the answer was at the tip of her tongue, the next, she was leaning in to listen to him speak, letting the suave sound float melodiously in her ears. She realised she liked it, because her heart was racing.
Thwack!
The sharp sting on her forehead brought a cry from the brunette, and her beautiful brown eyes opened, watering slightly. They fixed on an exasperated Taichi holding the blasted text book.
"You." He pointed the book at her with a weariness, and an underlying sense of defeat that Chihaya noticed with a frown. "You need to get your head cleared. Just...go and do whatever it is that you need to do to get better and come bac—"
Come back? Really? That's not the way it works, Mashima.
"—and study this once again. I'm...sort of stiff, Chihaya. I need to get up and stretch anyway."
She didn't say anything, just took the book from him slowly, and watched as he rose without meeting her eyes and stepped away towards the table where his bag was.
Someone had switched off that light inside him again, Chihaya noted. His eyes were dull, closed off, no longer luminescent when they looked at her...like all those days before. They had been making such progress! But today, now, here it was again.
She had a nagging feeling it was her who was fiddling with that switch so carelessly.
Unable to think of what to say, she opened the book and stared at it for a long while, an unexpected tightening in her throat. There was something swirling in her stomach, a gut feeling that something bad was in the near future, and she knew it revolved around him. And that was even scarier.
The room turned suffocating, but she was sure she was the only one who felt it, because the window was open, a blessed breeze was blowing, and Taichi was reading calmly at the table, hair continuously ruffled by the gentle incoming currents of air.
But she couldn't breathe.
And so she got up.
Her eyes prickled as she rose to her feet shakily, book abandoned, and walked over to the table with her mind set on autopilot. The stifling in her chest was getting uncomfortable, and she moved involuntarily to get it fixed. She went to the doctor.
Silently, a pair of long thin arms encircled his neck from behind and Taichi tensed on the chair.
Her breathing was shaky as she buried her face in his hair and palms cold against his shoulder, through the fabric of his T-shirt. Taichi swallowed his nerves, deciding to address the matter at hand than wallow in useless reactions and pondering.
His fingers lightly tapped against her forearm curled around his neck. "What's wrong?"
Chihaya took a deep breath, the smell of familiar shampoo calming her nerves as she buried her face into it. But her muscles relaxed, and mind cleared just a little.
"Chihaya?" he prompted softly, worry edging into his tone.
"I have a funny feeling." She murmured. He waited, ears sharp as she breathed a pause. "I-In my tummy."
Taichi frowned. "Did you eat anything strange?" He knew that wasn't it, but better make sure anyway.
"No, that's not it." She mumbled, then sighed desolately. "Its just a feeling...that something bad is going to happen."
Taichi blinked. Gut feeling, huh? Well there was nothing he could do about that.
"Hey, I get those too." He said reassuringly, listening for any changes in her demeanour. "Its all the exams and the tournament and stuff that's getting to you, Chihaya. Does this happen frequently?"
"Y-yes. It does, I think. But Taichi...I don't know if it the exams I'm worried about."
Taichi tensed for a second as an ugly thought came to him but then he dismissed it. "Each person has their own stuff to worry about, Chihaya." He murmured soothingly. "Maybe you're subconsciously anxious about the tournament, or...other things. These anxieties are just projecting at intervals so you don't entirely forget about them. But its nothing to lose sleep over, okay?"
"But it feels like something bad is going to happen."
"I get it." He said calmly, unwinding her arms from around his neck, and tugging her into the seat next to him. He needed to see her face to gauge reactions...and get her hands off of him.
Brown eyes were wide and anxious and nervous, like a genuine sort of panic he'd only glimpsed during certain games when she looked at him for reassurance. But right now, it seemed a tad...bigger.
"Listen," he leaned forward and took her hand and patted it comfortingly, eyes intent on hers, boring a message of reassurance into her. "I can't tell you that it's nothing, Chihaya. Instinct is one of our most important means of survival. But I'll tell you this, there's no use in letting it get to you. Whatever is supposed to happen, will happen in its own time. There's no use fretting over it now and wasting precious moments. You need to focus, okay? You've got a tournament coming up."
She swallowed, nodding, heart stuttering for reasons unknown. But he made sense, and she tried to let his advice sink in.
" Think positive." He smiled, letting go of her hands.
And she wished he didn't.
"That's coming from the biggest pessimist alive." She blurted, swallowing disappointment when he returned to pick up his book. Taichi grinned.
"I'm a realist, karuta-baka. There's a difference." He spared her another worried glance then. "Are you alright?"
She smiled and nodded, not entirely truthful and she knew he caught on the act with the way his eyes searched her face disbelievingly.
But they both decided to let it slide.
Turning back to his reading, he only paused to flick her forehead. " Chin up, girl. You've got stuff to accomplish."
And her lungs loosened and expanded because the switch was on again, his eyes were glowing with light again and she felt the tension inside melt.
The rest of the team showed up seconds later to practise and the two childhood friends traded academics for the sport.
Nishida sat, a little taken aback by how furiously Taichi was playing that day. He was ruthless, as if Karuta was a vent to let out whatever it was that bothered him. And the meat bun fan faltered at the intensity in his amber eyes. He took a step back to observe the boy. These days, as the tournament neared, he was training like a maniac.
Kana chan looked up from her game to watch him for a second too, and her lips curled into a proud smile. He was working so hard, fighting till the end even without meaning to. As saddened as she was about the whole thing, she knew things would be alright in the end...right?
It had to be alright.
But Buchou had a different air about him, a sort of strange level headedness, a calmness she'd never seen in him before. Not the usual maturity he exuded that everyone admired, this was something on the inside. His once uncomfortable and pained eyes were now mostly always cool and passive, almost...impassionate.
Except, there were those certain moments when the walls crashed and he burned in plain sight, pale, not breathing, eyes wide and lit with an anguish she never wished upon anyone ever. Especially not him.
Now a mix of these two new sides, he seemed to be drifting away slowly, and she knew Chihaya felt it too. And these changes made her question her old firm belief.
If he was ready to live with the pain, would things work out? But that's so unfair! Buchou has been fighting something since long before high school, and now that he feels so strongly for Chi-chan, he's only been suffering more because she's— and now that he's decided to live with it, even more difficult as it is, did it mean that was the end for him and Chi-chan? Kami-sama, he doesn't deserve that!
And not for the first time, Kana chan felt her stomach clench in anxiety.
See you next time!
