A/N: I was bored during class yesterday so I came up with what makesDaniel Jackson tick. They are mostly generalizations over the entire series so far. Spoilers for 'Stargate' (the movie),'Meridan', 'Lost City' (parts 1 and 2), 'Abyss', 'The Changeling', 'Fallen', and 'There But For the Grace of God'.I don't own Stargate (but I wish that I did). Please Read and Review.
Art of being Daniel Jackson
Jack leaned back in his chair, set down his pencil, and put his hands behind his head. He chuckled lightly to himself as he read what he had just written.
"What's so funny, sir?" Sam asked, sitting down across from him.
Jack looked at her, smiled, and slid the piece of paper towards her.
Sam picked it up and started to read. She looked at the first bullet point.
1. Must have a number of allergies so every time you travel uncontrollable sneezing occurs.
Sam stopped reading, looked up and said, "Is this part of some kind of bet?"
"No…well yes, but Daniel has to do the same thing for me or he has to take two weeks of vacation in a spot of my choosing."
Sam shook her head and continued reading:
2. Come up with ideas so outlandish that you become the laughing stock of the archeological community and are then recruited by the government and accidentally prove your theories right.
3. Look cute in a geeky way so that every time you go somewhere new, women fall hopelessly in love with you.
4. Put yourself in dangerous situations and be willing to risk your life in order to save your friends.
5. In those situations, get injured or make everyone think that you are dead then show up at the last moment slightly hurt.
6. Die, but ascend to a higher plane of existence in order to find true enlightenment.
7. While in ascended, appear to your friends when they are going through times of trial. But don't tell them about ascension; make them think that they are hallucinating.
8. Come back after a year of ascension, naked and with no memory of who you are or where you come from.
9. Help find the lost city of Atlantis and don't visit it for three years.
10. Have a name that when most people hear it, think of a brand of liquor.
11. Have such a low-tolerance for alcohol, that one sip of beer leaves you totally intoxicated.
12. Stand by your principles, no matter what happens and no matter what your friends think.
13. Save Earth a number of times and do not cash in on any of the favor's that result in said salvation.
14. Learn as many dead languages as possible. You never know when they'll come in handy.
15. In addition to dead languages, learn as many current ones as possible. You maybe required to do extensive travel in foreign countries where English is used very little.
16. Become the moral conscious of the group and clash with the military side of things when they conflict with the right thing to do.
17. Befriend an alien and support his cause.
18. Marry an alien.
19. Have an excellent eye doctor, as you will break many pairs of glasses on your travels.
20. No matter what you tell your team leader they will always touch the strange, unknown object before you are able to translate the ancient symbols.
21. Take up jogging and weight lifting because you will be required to run long distances or lift heavy things when the need arises.
22. Also learn how to shoot a gun, as you will have to defend yourself when in hostel territory.
23. When in an alternate reality, get proof to show that you were really there.
