So wake me up when it's all over
when I'm wiser and I'm bolder
all this time I was finding myself and I,
I didn't know I was lost.
…
That was the song I was singing as I drove to see me mum. She didn't remember me, she didn't remember much of anything anymore. But I saw her every week, hoping she'd have a good day and at least know we were related. That's what I was hoping that night as I was driving, singing along to the radio and following my car's headlights on the road.
It was the song that was playing when the car driving toward me swerved into my lane. Words on my tongue vanishing with the bright lights. I panicked and jerked the wheel right. Didn't do any good, only sent me over the bridge.
My mum's in a home where she could actually be taken care of, since most of the time I was a complete stranger to her. My car was old, as cheap as I could find and still be usable. The seatbelt stuck sometimes, I'd have to jiggle it for a bit for it to unlatch.
The water was cold as it seeped into the car, it was the middle of winter so it was freezing. I clawed at the buckle, screaming as it stuck and wouldn't unhook. The water was up to my waist now and climbing higher as my car sank. I cried as I tried to get out, pulling on the belt or trying to get the door open. Anything that would save me. I was so afraid.
It's funny how much your mum will tell you when she doesn't realize you're her daughter. Like how she had an affair with her boss, or how she and my dad didn't want kids. I learned a lot about the woman who'd given birth to me, who had no memories of after she was thirty and already pregnant with me. I learned why later my dad would leave when I was seven, it's cause he wasn't really my dad – I can't blame him for not being able to handle it. Both my parents have blonde hair, mine's brown and my eyes are even darker. I learned why my mother had been so cold. It had hurt at first, still did sometimes like when she'd say I had Charles' eyes – that's the man who's really my father by the way. But eventually, I became numb to it. To everything.
I tried to hold my breath, pulling as hard as I could on the strap across my chest. Drowning sucks, that's about all I can say. Eventually your lungs demand air only to be filled with water. No matter how many times you cough the water is never gone, and then you're sucking more back in. Over and over you sit convulsing as you fight to find some air, this pain burning in your chest and spreading down to your toes. Relief comes painfully, slowly, darkness finally letting you fade away into a numb black peace. I told you, it sucks.
And that was the day I died.
Nora Lee Harker. It's gotta nice ring to it, don't you think? You should remember that name, it's important. I was important, in a way. I fought in a battle, helped inadvertently slay a dragon, returned a king to his kingdom. I couldn't save him though, just as he couldn't save me. He'd tried so hard. And I never really got to say goodbye. But if I had to die, well, dying for Thorin Oakenshield isn't such a bad way to go.
Remember that name. Nora Lee Harker, a girl stuck out of time, a girl who stupidly fell in love with the most infuriating man, a girl who died twice. I told you, I was important.
So this is an idea I had after watching some Doctor Who, and I know a girl falling into Middle Earth is a very overused idea to the point where it's a cliché, but I thought I'd try my hand at it. I hope you guys continue to read it and enjoy it.
