A light dusting of snow was falling from the sky as Scarlett sat at the breakfast table, slowly sipping a steamy cup of coffee, liberally drowned in cream and sugar. She needed something to wake her from the haze that she was drowning in. Rhett was back in town for the Holidays. It would have been obvious to all of Atlanta that they were truly separated if they didn't spend Christmas together. But tomorrow would not be an easy day. It would be the first Christmas without Bonnie.
The front door slammed and Scarlett braced herself for the cold wind that surrounded her relationship with Rhett. He was staying with Belle Watling. He refused to stay in this house with her. She turned her eyes up to meet his as he stepped into the dinning room. "Good morning, Rhett." She said with a hint of coolness in her voice. But her hand was shaking as she spoke, as if his presence unnerved her a great deal more than she was willing to admit.
"Morning, Scarlett." He filled his plate from the side board which was loaded with food before sitting at the opposite end of the massive table that had been custom built for the room. "What are Wade and Ella doing today?"
"Good grief, Rhett. I have no idea. It's the day before Christmas. They are getting ready for Christmas." She looked at him annoyed that he would bother even asking.
"They are your children. I thought you might know of their plans." He paused to take a sip of his still steaming coffee that had been set before him. "Then what are your plans for the rest of the day?"
"Well, I'm going to go by the store and make sure that everything is going well. And I might so some more shopping." She told him.
"Well, If I end up downtown, I'll try to stop by so that people see us together." He said.
She started to take a sip of her coffee, but she managed instead to spill it down the front of her dress, an ever widening tan stain that she dabbed at to no avail.
At that moment Ella burst into the room, and in the presence of her step-father she began chattering nonsensically, preventing further discussion between the strained spouses. And so Scarlett rose to change from her ruined frock into something serviceable for her needs for the day.
The feelings had not faded for him in the intervening time since Melanie's death. Time had only allowed her rare moments of introspection in which she became able to see that her love had been with her much longer than she had even dreamed. But now she could not possibly open her heart again to be rejected and bereft once again. Instead she turned inwardly and focused upon the only things that had ever really given her a sense of peace and accomplishment.
And now Scarlett sat at the desk near the counter reviewing the books. The store was in good order, and there wasn't much left for her to do. She knew Rhett would call her Ebeneezer Scrooge if she didn't close early to let her clerks go home to spend the evening with their families. During their marriage, at least in the early days, he had been greatly amused by referring to her in such a manner. After the miscarriage, after that night when he had taken her after Ashley's party, he had become detached, impersonal. They had not bickered any longer. That feeling was what she was avoiding now. But at the moment, she couldn't stand the thought of going home to the strained atmosphere. Rhett might even stay at the house tonight, since it was Christmas Eve after all.
The store was quickly emptying of patrons, and she knew that the time was getting away from her. Finally the manager came up to her and asked if she would be fine if he left. She quickly dismissed him and wished him a Happy Christmas. He hurriedly gathered his coat and left, probably worried that she might rescind her offer..
She worked in quiet darkness, adding and re-adding numbers that were proven to be correct at her first glance. She enjoyed the easy dark that surrounded her. It was welcome. But then the jingling of the bell alerted Scarlett to another's presence. "We're closed." She called from her desk, wanting whoever might be disrupting her peace to leave.
"I'm not here to buy anything. It's getting late, and it's time for someone to be home." A well modulated drawling voice replied.
"Oh, it's you , Rhett. I guess that the time got away from me." She didn't even need to see his face to know his voice. It was his voice that taunted her in her dreams as well as her nightmares.
"Be serious, Scarlett. I came back to keep the gossip down for the benefit off your children, and yet you'd rather hole yourself up in this dank little store than spend Christmas Eve with your children." His eyes glittered with anger at her carelessness as he grabbed her wraps and held them up for her.
"You don't love me. You left me and my children. Why should you be so concerned.?" She exclaimed unable to keep her annoyance masked. She stood and grabbed them from his hands impatiently. "Fine, I'm leaving. And I don't care if you come or not."
"You'd be more eager if you were spending the holiday with Ashley and Beau, wouldn't you?"
She turned to him, stopping her progress towards the front of the store. "I've told you that I don't love Ashley, but you refuse to listen to me."
Rhett grimaced. "I don't need to hear your confessions of love again. We've already been through this all."
Scarlett resumed her retreat and rushed out the door , with Rhett close on her heels. "I've lost your love; I don't know what else to say Rhett. I've realized my mistakes. Why can't you forgive me?"
"I can't just forget all of the years, just because you say that you love me and you are sorry. You're such a petty child!" He finished in exasperation.
"I'm going home! I'd rather spend Christmas with anyone other than an unfeeling cad like you!" she cried.
"Well don't let me stop you. Maybe an accident will stop it!" He added coldly.
Scarlett was tired of the constant bickering and finally launched herself at him, to slap him, or claw him or whatever might make him feel something other than this casual indifference and thinly veiled malice.
But with the casual ease of a seasoned fighter he side stepped her attack and she went stumbling off of the sidewalk into the muddy street. She stumbled and fell to her knees. And it wasn't until the carriage was upon them, did she finally see the end as it came. She felt the sharp stabbing pains as the horses hoofs trampled her,before the blackness swallowed her.
She awoke to a weary dullness, to find herself undressed and lying on her bed. And she was tired, so exceptionally tired that it was a struggle to open her eyes. A faint moan escaped from her lips, and she felt something brush the hair from her eyes.
She heard him then, and she forced her eyes open. A faint whisper escaped from her lips. "Rhett."
His eyes found hers, and he brushed her lips with his, tear drops falling from his face to hers. "Scarlett. Scarlett. I can't lose you. Please don't go. I was wrong. I do love you. Scarlett, please, please. Scarlett, I can't lose you too."
"I love you, Rhett. Know that. I love you. Tell Wade....and Ella.... I love them." She sighed tiredly. The effort to speak those words seem to sap what little strength that she had.
"Scarlett, damn you! Scarlett! Fight! Scarlett, stay with me! Damn you! You can't die!" There was real fear in his voice and she could see it in his eyes.
"I'm Sorry." She knew, from her time spent nursing that the end was almost here. She could hear the death rattle in her own chest. Her eyes held no glitter. They were dull and flat. "I'm dying, Rhett. We can't stop it." Her eyes seemed to hold a wisdom that they had never held before. "Pray for me Rhett. Pray for Purgatory."
"Scarlett, don't talk like that. Please, Scarlett, you can make it." His eyes glittered with unshed tears.
"I love you, Rhett." Her breathing grew more and more erratic. "Kiss me."
He bent forward and placed a gentle kiss on her lips. Their tears mixing as his tears fell onto her face. She responded weakly to him, and he felt as if he could feel the life slipping from her.
"I love you, Scarlett. I always have." Scarlett sighed one last shuddering breath, and Rhett kissed her pale lips, trying to hold on to these last lingering moments. But she was gone. Scarlett was dead. And he cared. God help him, he cared. He loved her. And now she was leaving, taking the very last embers of love with her last breath. He crawled into the bed beside her now silent body and held her against to him. How was he to go on without her?
He held her limp body in his arms. He had missed out on these last months because of the dull emptiness that had taken over his very existence. And now he had lost her too. There was nothing left. And he held her until sleep and grief and exhaustion won out.
