A/N- I've got no idea hwat I'm doing in this fandom. I only know it from 358/2 days and I'm not even done wth that. Oh, the shame.

Rated for um.... Suggestion. Yes. xD Fun fun fun. And some language on Larxy's part. Thanks, Divine Wolfe, for beta-ing this!

0-0-0

Flash Fires

A Larxel Drabble Oneshot Collection

0-0-0

1-- Scold

He made a mocking tut-tut noise. "Naughty girl." She flashed her weapons at him, little sparks of fury erupting from her blades. "I'm going to rip off your face and make you eat it."

0-0-0

Larxene was not having a very good day.

For starters, someone had ratted to Xemnas about how she almost electrocuted Demyx in the bathtub by sending a charge up the water pipes. Always quick to administer justice, he had made her clean the Nobodies bathroom. This should have been bad enough, but Axel had decided to lurk in the doorway and comment on her work. He did shut up when she threw three knifes into his thigh. She hadn't been aiming for his leg, however, and cursed his surprising reflexes under her breath.

The cherry on top of the whole thing, however, was when Saix had informed her, as she was on her hands and knees scraping crusted Mickey-knows-what off the tile floor, that she was to teach the little Keyblade boy how to use magic the next morning. Joyous.

Larxene growled under her breath, hissing promises of pain and suffering to the world in general.

"Don't you just sound like a bucket of sunshine," came a familar drawl.

Axel seemed to not have learned his lesson. Larxene readied her knives.

"Shut up, you scrawny cocksure bastard."

"You should use some of that soap to clean out your mouth." He made a mocking tut-tut noise. "Naughty girl."

She flashed her weapons at him, little sparks of fury erupting from her blades. "I'm going to rip off your face and make you eat it."

"That's more like you," he conceded, then shifted his weight. "Um.... hey. Can I ask you something?"

"You can." She shrugged, feigning cold disinterest, "and I can choose whether or not to answer."

"Fair enough. Please don't kill Roxas tomorrow."

The Savage Nymph gave a cruel laugh, and then stopped as she heard Axel cough. "Oh, wait, you're serious?"

He shrugged. She gave him a coy, albeit dangerous look. "You'd rob me of my fun? You forget, I never got to haze a newbie before. Perhaps I could make this little Bearer pay for when you branded me on the hip with your chakrams."

Axel gave a soft, almost unconcious chuckle at the memory. "Oh, that was a good-- Ah, but please, Larx. Don't bring him into this. He is the Keyblade's Chosen and on our side. I don't know about you, but I want a heart."

"I won't kill him," she purred, smirking at the thought of the fun she could get out of this. "I promise. Anything else, though--"

"You can brand me if you want," he offered with a smirk of his own. Larxene shot him a glare. "Oh, you'd love that, wouldn't you?"

"Can't. Don't have a heart." Axel shrugged his black-clad shoulders, still smiling evilly before sobering up; which gave Larxene a bit of a shock. "Still. Be nice to Roxas--"

"So the shrimp has a name?"

"-- And I'll make it up to you. Somehow. Got it memorized?"

Larxene smirked. This is probably the only good thing about Axel. He's one of the only ones in the whole Castle willing to stick his neck out for things that were important to him. Add that with a slice of macho pride and I have my very own bitch. Yahoo.

"You have a deal." Fluidly, she threw the dirty rag at him, which he caught with a stifled groan. "For starters, finish this bathroom. No doubt you contributed to this mess, so it's only fair you clean it up."

Her smile only widened as she booted him into the room and locked the door. Ah, even hot headed assassins have their uses sometimes.

0-0-0-0

Zexion swung the door open grandly, and scowled as the door made a little thunking noise when it hit resistance. "Out of the way," he snapped reflexively, only too late remembering who had been designated to clean.

The littlest Nobody went a little pale, and made an illusion of himself walking further into the bathroom. No kunai or thunderbolts came at him- indeed, there was only a muffled curse.

"...Axel?"

"Hey, Shorty," the Nobody muttered, and the sound of despondent scrubbing reached his ears. "I traded my soul for Roxas' safety. I hate myself. And when I find out who did this, I'm going to make them lick it off the floor. It's like.... cemented on here."

"Lovely. You really are a masochist, aren't you?" Zexion pulled his gloves off delicately and began washing his hand at the sink. He could see Axel give him a 'I'm tired so speak in English you stupid smart ass' look in the mirror. "You like putting yourself in painful positions. Especially when it comes to our resident girl."

"...You better not be implying what I think you're implying."

Zexion transformed his hand into a sulky looking Axel sock puppet. "Oh, look at me, I'm using biiiig words like 'imply' to cover up the fact that I want Larxene to chain me to the bed and--"

With a swift duck and roll, the Schemer demonstrated his knowledge on 'discretion being the better part of valor', and left Number VIII to stew and scrub in the bathroom.

0-0-0-0

Later On

0-0-0-0

Silent as a moon shadow, Larxene pressed herself against the wall of the clock tower and watched Roxas vanish into the portal. The kid really hadn't done too badly that day. Not that she planned on telling Axel that- he'd probably rub it in her face.

Speaking of face- she slunk casually out from the shadows, smirking, cat-like, as she approached the fiery Nobody. He returned the smirk with a little less ferocity.

"You kept your word." Axel sounded slightly... impressed. Her smirk widened. "You doubted me?"

"Frankly, yes. " He absently licked his dwindling sea salt ice cream. "But don't take it personally."

Larxene crossed her arms and tilted her head to the side as she plotted Axel's demise. Right now, for some reason, she couldn't decide whether she wanted to push him off the top of the building or push him onto his back. Oh, decisions, decisions.

"What am I going to do with you?" she purred, neatly slipping into his lap and wrapping her legs around his waist. This wasn't too hard since he was a skinny-ass Nobody, but still.

"You can't think of anything yourself? You must be losing your edge," he replied, but she noticed him shift uneasily under her. Men are so easy to manipulate.

Stealing his ice cream, she slipped the last chunk of the cold confection off the stick, licking her lips as she spoke again. "Do I act like... " she drew the stick along Axel's cheekbone, "...I'm losing my edge?"

He chuckled hollowly. "Well, you haven't seemed to decide what to do with me yet. I have my theories, but no concrete evidence."

Suddenly, she stood, slipped behind him, and booted him neatly into space, following a moment later. He hit the ground on his back with an audible grunt as she landed lightly on her feet.

The Savage Nymph peered down at him, the smirk never having left her face. "Concrete enough for you?"

"Cobblestone, actually," he panted, only winded. At she started to step over his legs, he reached out and tripped her. With a growl of annoyance, she found herself sprawled on his chest and locked in a kiss.

Larxene started to sit up, furious at having fallen- literally- for a rather amateur move, and was vexed to find that Axel was actually stronger than her. Even worse... he was a pretty good kisser. Bastard.

I should have just pushed him off the tower in the first place, she scolded herself, a little shiver running down her spine as he rubbed his gloved hands along the back of her neck. Ooooh, hot bastard.

After another moment, he stopped, cocking an eyebrow. "Well, that's my two cents. Got it memori--"

He grunted again as she slammed him back onto the ground, crouching over him like a tiger. "I hate you. Remember that." Still pinning him, she opened a Corridor with a flick of her hand.

Axel grinned. "Oh, I don't think I'll be forgetting this."

0-0-0-0

The door to Zexion's room burst open, and the Cloaked Schemer gave his intruders a glare.

"What are you insipid morons doing in my room?"

Seeing as Marluxia and Demyx were busy fighting over Zexion's pillows- and because he was probably the only one to understand the word 'insipid' anyway- Luxord chuckled.

"Axel said you were going to do a puppet show for us. Vexen owes me a Rune Tech+ if Axel lied."

Zexion hissed as more of the Organization filtered in, and a couple of Dusks. "Oh, he's going to pay with his-- Superior?"

Xemnas slapped Marluxia and Demyx each on the rear with his aerial blade. "I wouldn't miss your show for the world, Number VI. I heard you were going to start with 'The Sound of Music.' I used to enjoy that movie immensely and would like to reminisce on those feelings this evening."

Xigbar slapped the shorter Nobody on the back. "Look's like you're up, emo midget."

"Shut up."

0-0-0-0

Saix was leaned against the door as Zexion's show drew to a close, watching only with half-interest as the illusionist sat on the top of a bookcase, controlling imaginary marionettes as the record player in the corner moaned 'Memory' from the musical 'Cats.'

After a moment, he noticed that Larxene had slipped up behind him and was watching as well.

"Good evening, Number XII, " he murmured in a low voice, still gaining the attention of Xaldin, who nudged Luxord and Xigbar.

"Have fun, Poppet?" chuckled the one-eyed Nobody. She smiled coldly. "Don't make me come over there."

Xemnas shushed them loudly, and the conversation died. However, when Axel appeared a moment later, Xaldin was seen passing a few chunks of Silver to Luxord with a look of distaste.

"Did you have fun," Axel breathed in the blonde's ear.

Larxene shrugged. "Oh, I guess even you have your uses."

0-0-0-0

0-0-0-0

0-0-0-0

...Oh yes. I did just do that. I is only slightly shamed, too. Hmm.