Mikasa had thought the baby project was a myth, something made up to give teen movies an actual plot.
"You have got to be kidding me," she mumbled under her breath.
Judging by the growing piles of plastic baby dolls on their teacher's desk, however, it was real. Not a joke - as nice as their teacher was, she had never been the funniest. The words written one the dry erase board - "This project is worth thirty-five percent of your grade!" - certainly didn't help.
"Petra, are we seriously doing this?" Ymir called. The girl was bold, even in a way Mikasa herself wasn't.
Thanks for putting everyone's thoughts to words, Mikasa thought. She glanced over at the baby dolls. Though the plastic monstrosities were of varying shades, they looked to be all about the same size.
Those things are huge, Mikasa thought. How am I supposed to lug around eight-hundred page textbooks and those things at the same time?
"Ymir, I've told you countless times that you should refer to me by Mrs. Green rather than my first name. It's school policy and shows respect." She turned to face the rest of the room. "And yes, class, this is an assignment." She gestured towards the box, which she was still unpacking.
"I'm sorry, Mrs. Green." Ymir sighed.
Mrs. Green smiled. "Just remember what I said and everything will be fine." She turned back towards the box.
"So how many plastic babies do you are in that box?" Ymir leaned forward and whispered, more to anyone who sat near her than to an exact person.
"I hope we're not raising twins." Krista replied.
"Hey, I'd raise as many kids as those moms in reality TV shows have if I could do it with you, Krista." Ymir grinned.
Krista's face turned bright red and Mikasa rolled her eyes. She was just barely able to hold back a sigh.
Great, she thought. Now our health class is going to turn into a soap opera."
"I was personally hoping that if we did do this project," Sasha commented, "then it would be with flour or eggs or something."
Ymir snorted. "You can't eat eggs or flour raw."
"I so can," Sasha retorted. "Raw eggs taste wonderful. And flour? Those can always be baked into cookies."
"I don't think you'd get an A if you turned your baby into cookies." Krista said.
"Yeah, that doesn't seem like responsible parenting." Ymir laughed.
"I could always just go buy a carton of eggs or another bag of flour. How would the teacher know the difference?"
Ymir's eyes widened. "That isn't a half bad idea. Instead, we get to carry around dolls. We're teenagers, not five years old!" Her voice rose near the end.
If this a soap opera, Mikasa thought, then why am I unable to change the channel?
Judging by the sea of frowning faces, no one else looked happy about the project.
Figures, Mikasa thought. She looked down to her notebook. She had written down and studied countless notes. Shouldn't those have been what kept her grade up instead of plastic dolls?
"Do you think this project is going to teach us the miracle of life?" Sasha asked.
"No, probably not," Ymir replied. "I'd much rather prefer a project that teaches us about where babies come from."
Krista's face and neck turned red. "Ymir, this isn't sixth grade health class. We're a little more educated on that stuff now and have to learn something new."
"Playing with dolls isn't anything new," Ymir replied.
Mikasa looked up to the clock. Had a mere twenty-five minutes passed? There was still an hour and five minutes left before class ended.
Seemingly having finally emptied the box, Ms. Green stood up and wiped off her hands. "Now class, I know that this might seem like a bit of a strange assignment." She paused, as if expecting a comment.
Too bad for her that Ymir already told them all to Sasha, Mikasa thought.
"When doing this project, you'll be able to see the struggles an ordinary parent faces while raising a child. It's a good thing that I've assigned partners for everyone!" She picked up her clipboard from her desk and looked over it for a moment. Her eyebrows dropped. "Well, almost everyone. Ms. Braus, since we are an oddly numbered class, I could not find a partner for you."
"What? But my dad always told me to never become a single parent in high school!"
Both Ymir and Krista burst out laughing.
"Just join another group," Ymir said. "Open relationships and threesomes are all over trashy supermarket magazines already. Besides, then you'll have two other people to dump the baby on!"
The two' s laughter probably could be heard in the algebra II room all the way across the hall.
Remind me again, Mikasa thought, why I'm required to pass this class to graduate.
"Oh no," Ms. Green replied, tightening her grip on her clip board. "This is an equal partner project. Both of you have to raise the baby equally; it makes for a healthier bond between the baby and both parents."
Jean, who sat near the front, raised his hand.
"Yes, Mr. Kirshtein?"
"Do you and your partner raise your baby equally?"
Ms. Green's eyes widened, the way that they always did whenever a student bothered to ask about her personal life. "Why yes, of course! Or at least we mostly do."
"What do you mean?" Jean asked.
"Well, Dr. Zoe really likes to spend time with little Kai when they get home from work. Sometimes I think that they're hogging the baby from me!" Ms. Green laughed. "Speaking of little Kai, who wants to see some pictures their mommy took?"
A few people in class, Mikasa included, raised their hands. In the end, seeing pictures of Ms. Green and her partner's baby was far more preferable than holding a cold, plastic baby doll. The longer that the ugly thing remained on Ms. Green's desk, the better.
Ms. Green opened her laptop and began typing.
"Well, if this project is secretly designed to make us not want children," Ymir said, leaning back in her chair, "then I wouldn't be the least bit surprised."
The room seemed to go silent after that, save for the clacking of keys and the clicks of Ms. Green's mouse. Mikasa half expected Ymir to make another snarky comment, but she remained silent, her eyes on Krista.
The silence was broken by a sudden, high pitched wail. Soon, others joined in.
Are those babies? Mikasa thought. Her hands were at her ears and her eyes were shut.
She opened her eyes but didn't take her hands off of her ears. Ms. Green was busy fretting over the dolls. Most of the other students were covering their ears. A few even had gotten out of their seat and hidden under their desk.
Of course it was the dolls, Mikasa thought, eyes locked on the cold plastic toys. Of all the assignments that we could have done, it had to be this.
They weren't even going to be studying child development for a month! There were two units the class still had to get through.
"Relax, kids," Ms. Green said. "It's just the dolls." She yelled to get over the wailing. "Look, just come grab a doll and start rocking it. Make the baby relax."
No one got up from their seat.
"Please class," Ms. Green continued. "I can't hold all these dolls." Her eyes dropped to the one doll in her hand, which never seemed to stop crying (though its hard plastic face still held a sculpted smile) no matter how much she rocked it.
Everyone remained in their seats.
Just great, Mikasa thought, looking to the clock. I'm going to be stuck listening to this for the rest of class.
"Can someone just grab a doll?" Ms. Green huffed. "This is an important assignment, and I expect both you and your partner to take it seriously."
Ymir raised her hand high in the air. Within moments, every set of eyes in the room, Mikasa's included, landed on her.
"Yes, Ymir?"
"If I go grab a doll then will you let me choose a doll?"
Ms. Green's face fell. She looked around the room. No one else moved or spoke. Her eyes turned back towards the doll. "Of course you can, Ymir."
Mikasa had always known that Ymir was fast; as one of the few other girls' varsity track members, she had to have been fast to get accepted by Coach Pixis. She easily could have broken a record when she raced from her desk in the back of the health class to the front of the room. She picked up a doll with deep brown skin, a close shade to her own, and quickly began to rock it in her arms. Within moments, it had silenced.
"Thank you," Ms. Green said, giving Ymir a small smile.
The class turned still once more.
"Well, now seems like the best time to assign partners. Go stand by yours so I'll know not to assign them with anyone else."
Ymir walked over to Krista. Once she was by her desk, she handed the doll over. "I just got back from taking a blood test, so I can now proudly say its yours!"
Mikasa snorted.
"Alright, listen," Ms. Green said. In one hand she rocked a doll and in the other she held a clip board. "I wrote down this list last night and based it on who I thought you could work with best. Don't complain about your partner because I'm not changing it."
Mikasa only half listened to her. The crying babies had become somewhat easier to ignore. The clock kept ticking on.
"Hannah and Fritz," Ms. Green said. "Marco and Jean, Connie and Armin..." After a long list of names, Ms. Green finally reached Mikasa's name. "... and Annie Leonheart."
Mikasa jerked up from her seat. Her eyes turned to the very back of the room, where the cold eyed blond shot daggers at her.
I have to work with her? Mikasa thought. Now my grade really will be in the toilet.
"What about me?" Sasha called. "You never said mine, Ms. Green."
"Oh, Sasha, since this is an oddly numbered class I ended up having to put you in this alone."
"She could partner up with us!" Ymir called. "Threesomes are all the rage these days!"
Mikasa could only half listen to the other conversations in the room. It seemed as if she and Annie would never stop glaring at each other.
"Well, class, come grab your babies." Ms. Green said.
Annie and Mikasa stared at each other a few moments longer before Mikasa finally turned away. With heavy steps, she walked to the front of the room and grabbed one of the dolls. It had light brown skin, dark hair, and a facial shape similar to Mikasa's.
"Oh, Mikasa, your baby is so cute!" Sasha held her own doll tight in her hands. It had bright blue eyes and a big mouth opened wide.
"She gets her looks from my side." Mikasa said. She glanced back towards the back of the room. Even from the distance between them, the two girls again glared at each other. Annie hadn't even bothered to stand up.
Their staring - or, rather, glaring - contest was broken up by a loud pounding on the doors. Sasha squeaked, almost jumped a foot into the air, and dropped her baby doll onto the floor. Within moments, the robotic howling returned, again filling the room.
