Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush
So excited about this one-shot! This is my first one-shot and my first for the Hidden Feelings series! If you guys want more, just PM me with your ideas for one-shots and let me know, I'll be glad to do them.
This is for Mrs. Henderson-Mitchell! Thanks for the idea boo!
Please enjoy! It took hours, but I think it turned out good.
We all remember this scene from Unbroken Feelings…
"I'm sure you're wondering why I wanted you hear," Dak said.
"Yeah," Carlos nodded, rolling his eyes.
"I want Logan…"
"Logan is MINE, and even if we were to divorce, what makes you think he would come to you?"
Of course we all remember what happened after that, but have you ever wondered what would've happened if Logan did leave Carlos for Dak? Well, wonder no more…
Carlos' POV
I was still laughing as I got in my car after work thinking about what Dak had said. I couldn't believe that he wanted me to divorce my husband so he could have him, but that would never happen and I know that, so really I wasn't worried.
A Few Weeks Later…
"Carlos?" Logan looked surprised.
"Logan?" My eyes widened. "What are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing," He replied.
It turns out that all of this time, both Logan and I were helping Dak and didn't even know about the other, and that was just what he wanted.
"Anyway, it's time for it to hit the fan," Dak said. "Remember what I told you last time, Carlos?"
I almost laughed thinking back on it, but it was a little too tense of a situation to really respond that way.
"What happened last time?" Logan asked.
"Dak thinks you'll break up with me for him," I rolled my eyes.
Logan's face was blank, and then he looks slightly guilty, causing me to raise an eyebrow. Why isn't he laughing or telling Dak off?
"Logan?" I looked at him.
"Hmm?" he seemed to be distracted all of a sudden.
"I don't have to worry right?" My voice was slightly rising.
"Well…"
"Well what?" I asked, my voice dangerously low.
"I was going to tell you when it wasn't your birthday, but…I'm breaking up with you for Dak," Logan said.
"Oh sweet!" Dak smiled. "So, you thought about what I said.
I was still letting the words sink in. Did he really just say that? I'm doing all I can to not punch the shit out of either of them. I'd never imagined that a heart could literally break and split in half, but this feels pretty close.
"You're joking right?" I asked, my voice cracking as I felt tears prick my eyes.
"I'm not," Logan said sadly.
"But…what about us? The kids? I'm having your fucking child!" I pointed to my stomach.
The rage was building up.
"See, you were so confident that your little Logie bear would be with you forever, but look now, I have him!" Dak bragged like a little kid.
I couldn't take that, and before I knew it, my fist was connecting with his cheek and he hit the floor. I felt a hint of satisfaction, but I couldn't help but feel betrayed. Logan kneeled next to Dak, helping him up as he held his jaw.
Pathetic ass bitch.
"Carlos! Look what you did to him!" Logan scolded.
"LOOK AT WHAT HE'S DONE TO US ARE YOU STUPID?!" I exploded finally. "I know I haven't given you a huge amount of years of my love as a husband, but I've given you over 20 years of my love as a friend and you betrayed me. We have children…what will they think?"
Logan just looked at me before turning to Dak.
"Come on baby, let's go get you cleaned up," Logan kissed his cheek, causing Dak to blush.
Is this how we look…I'm sorry, looked, to everyone? It's disgusting, especially when those two do it. Before I could even say anything, the two disappeared into the back room. I just stood there, completely surprised that it even happened, and on my birthday.
I finally let the tears fall. I was not going to sob, but they were silent tears that ached for Logan. I dropped to my knees, still crying.
"Logan, I love you," I whispered.
When I finally got myself together enough to drive home, I did, and as soon as I opened the door, Lucy noticed my expression.
"Where's Logan?" She asked.
I ignored her and the kids, going upstairs and plopping down on my bed. I don't know how long it was, but I eventually fell asleep. When I woke up, Kendall and James were both staring at me. I sat up, not bothering to meet their eyes; what just happened flooded my memory at once.
"Are you okay?" Kendall asked. "Lucy told us you didn't look happy, and we were supposed to be going out."
"Sorry guys," I was surprised I had a voice. "Thank you for the love and support, but I'm not feeling good today."
"Well…okay," James said. "Where's Logan?"
My eyes instantly darkened, and they noticed it.
"…Okay, bad question."
Ethan and Emma came up the stairs in Lucy's arms.
"They wanted to see you," Lucy explained, plopping them on the bed before going back downstairs.
Ethan and Emma both jumped into my lap. At least I had these two…but Emma looks like Logan, and she's Logan and Dak's child. I don't know how I feel about this right now.
"So, where's Daddy?" Emma asked.
I tried to control my reaction. By the look on Kendall and James' faces, I failed.
"Um…daddy isn't coming home," I said, managing to not sound bitter. "He found a…new friend and he's going to live with them from now on."
I didn't dare look over at Kendall and James, and I didn't have to. Without even looking at Kendall, I knew that he had balled his fist up and he was staring fire into the side of my head. James gasped loudly. They were totally going to grill me when the kids are gone.
"Is he coming back to us?" Ethan asked.
"He'll come and visit you, big guy," I chuckled slightly. "But he won't be around all the time."
"Does Daddy not love us anymore?" Ethan asked.
Oh my gosh, I can't do this. Tears started rolling down my cheeks again, I couldn't control myself. Why the hell would Logan do this to us? We love him, we had a great relationship and the kids adore him.
"Your daddy loves you very much," Kendall took over. "He just made some bad choices and he's smart enough to not come back here for a while…because he's fucking dead.
The kids didn't hear the last part, but I did.
"How about you go back downstairs with Aunt Lucy?" James suggested.
The kids nodded and James picked them up before taking them back downstairs. As soon as they were out of ear shot, Kendall spoke.
"Carlos, what the he'll happened?" Kendall whispered harshly.
"He left me for Dak," I said bitterly.
I was literally afraid that Kendall would make the house explode.
"I'M GOING TO KILL HIM," Kendall was fuming.
James came running back into the room.
"What's going on?" James asked.
"Logan left Carlos for Dak," Kendall said, tapping his foot angrily.
"WHAT? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HIM!" James yelled.
"Shhh, the kids!" I scolded.
"I can't believe that asshole! He leaves you for someone who hurt him and changed the course of his life forever, and he left you pregnant with a child and two other children to take care of. You've stuck through so much with him and he just throws all of that away!"
Kendall was so upset, and so was I because the more I thought about it, the more upset I became.
"I don't want to talk about this right now," I laid back down.
"We understand," Kendall said, calmed down a bit. "He just better not bring his ass back around here until I'm calm."
"I punched Dak," I said randomly.
"Hell yeah!" James smiled.
"I didn't make me feel better."
"Oh…"
"Listen, Car just remember that we're here for you," Kendall said.
"Yeah, we won't make you do this alone," James agreed.
2 ½ months later…
I'm not going to lie and say that the past few months have been smooth because they haven't. I miss Logan, the kids miss Logan, I'm all alone and I'm 9 months pregnant. I also feel horrible because now every time I see Emma, I see her two parents, both of which are trying to destroy me.
Of course I love Emma, she is my daughter legally and I'm going to take care of her, but she also makes me uncomfortable now because she doesn't even have a part of me and I have to raise her alone.
Logan has been by a few times, but we haven't interacted. He would just come specifically to tuck the kids in or pick up clothes or something. Despite what he did to me, he's still an amazing father to his kids, and he sees them all the time.
I'm just sitting on the couch, rubbing my huge belly because the baby was kicking. There was a knock on the door. I sighed, picking myself up off the couch and waddling over to the door. I opened it to find Logan.
"Hi Carlos," He said.
"Hi...The kids aren't here," I said.
"I actually came to talk to you," he said.
I just stared at him before stepping to the side. He walked in and sat on the couch.
"What do you want to talk about?" I asked, sitting in the armchair.
"I just wanted to say that I'm so-"
"Don't say that to me," I cut him off. "I don't want to hear it."
"I'm just trying to make amends here," He said.
"Make amends?" I laughed. "What did I do wrong?"
"Nothing, I just needed something else," Logan said.
"Well guess what, you can't just up and do something like that when you're in the middle of this situation," I said. "I mean, really? Do you plan to spend the rest of your life running from the cops?"
"I don't need criticizing my decisions," Logan said. "I just want to continue to be friends."
"Friends?! I loved you and you broke my heart," I said. "I can't even look at you without thinking about that moment when you kissed his cheek. Can you imagine how it felt having to tell the kids that you wouldn't be coming home? I broke down if that's what you wanted."
"Carlos…."
"No, you have a house, a career, a family to take care of, and you disregarded all of that for Dak, you make no sense!"
"Carlos…"
"I'm not done! I can't believe you would do this and you aren't the Logan I've known for most of my life," I said.
"Carlos! Dak is pregnant!"
"…What?" my jaw dropped.
"Yeah…we're having a baby," he said awkwardly.
I didn't even really know how to respond to that. Like, we're still married and you already moved on and you're starting a new family.
"Get out of my house," I said simply.
"What?"
"GET OUT!"
"No, we need to talk about this," Logan said.
I was prepared to yell back, but I was shut up by a sharp pain in my abdomen. Oh my gosh, not now.
"Are you okay?" Logan asked.
It was definitely a contraction. Shit. I ignored Logan's question and pulled out my cell phone, dialing Kendall's number.
"Hello?"
"Kendall, I'm going into labor," I said.
"Coming over right now."
Kendall hung up and in less than two minutes, he was over at our house. He stopped when he saw Logan. He ignored him completely and walked over to me.
"I'll go get your bag," Kendall said. "James is starting the car."
"How can I help?" Logan asked.
"You aren't going," Kendall said stubbornly.
"This is my child," Logan said. "I'm going to be there."
Kendall glared at Logan and Logan glared right back. That's another thing, the two have been tense. They used to be the best of friends, but now they can't even talk to each other. I decided to defend him for one because if I was lucky, maybe he would hold my hand.
"This is baby Kendall, he can be there," I said.
"Thanks Carlos," Logan said.
"Whatever," I replied.
Dear god, I really need to get over him, but this is so messed up. This is not how it's supposed to be. Part of me hates him, but most of me still loves him like no other. Kendall rolled his eyes before going upstairs.
"Carlos, if you don't mind could you not tell them about Dak's pregnancy?" Logan asked.
This is so awkward. I had a good mind to say no, but I don't want to see Logan in a casket anytime soon.
"Fine," I sighed.
With that, I walked right past him and out of the door. I got into the car, Logan sliding in right beside me.
"Logan?" James looked in the mirror. "What are you doing here?"
"This is my baby right?" Logan chuckled.
"…Yeah," James said.
James doesn't exactly care for Logan anymore, but they can still be civil with each other. I didn't even realize that they had called Jett until he got in the car and slid in next to me.
"How are you feeling?" He asked.
"Contractions hurt," I said.
It was weird, these contractions were coming kind of fast. It had only been five minutes and I was already having another one.
"Have you had another one?" Logan asked.
That seemed to be the first time that Jett noticed Logan. Either that or he was ignoring him purposely.
"Hello Logan," Jett said.
"Hi Jett," Logan waved.
Kendall finally made it back to the car and he got in the front seat. James pulled out of the driveway and then we were on our way. It was a really awkward car ride.
"So, how is life with Dak?" Jett asked eventually.
I turned to glare at him.
"Really great," Logan turned red.
He was lying. Even I knew that.
"You enjoy getting raped every night?" Kendall asked.
"Kendall," I sighed.
"No, it's okay," Logan said. "He's a changed man."
"Oh, I bet," Kendall sneered.
"You don't even know him," Logan defended.
"And you do?" Kendall laughed. "Come on, Logan. We all know this is a joke!"
"I love him okay?" Logan tried.
"So, what happened to the love between the people in this car?" Kendall asked.
"Well, you hate me because Carlos and I didn't work out. I still love you guys!"
"Didn't work out?" Kendall turned to look at him. "Everything worked out until Carlos' birthday…"
"Well, things change," Logan said calmly. "We're happy and we're having a baby together."
My eyes widened. I thought it was supposed to stay a secret. James slammed on the brakes, stopping the car in the middle of traffic.
"WHAT?" James yelled.
"You're pregnant?" Jett asked.
"No, never again," Logan said. "Dak is and we're happy about it."
James started driving again, but he didn't say much. Kendall hadn't said a word. I looked up at him. His expression was tight, his face was red, but he was facing forward and he was completely silent. No one spoke for the rest of the ride.
8 hours later…
"One more push, Carlos," Logan grabbed my hand.
I yelled as I gave one last hard push, relaxing when I felt the baby pass. I smiled as I heard that first cry.
"It is a boy," Dr. Martin smiled.
I was so sweaty and hot. This was the second time I had gone through this, but I felt like an old pro.
"You did it, Carlos," Logan smiled.
I gave him a small smile in return. When the baby was put in my arms, I smiled. He was like a splitting image of Logan. It was so weird, and it reminded me that our current family situation is wrong.
When Kendall, James, and Jett came in, they crowded me immediately.
"Oh, he's cutes," James smiled. "Can I hold him?"
"Guys, I have to let Logan hold him first," I chuckled.
They chuckled awkwardly. I handed the baby over to Logan, who smiled down at him.
"Hey little guy," Logan smiled.
We decided to call him Evan Ryder, and after a small debate between Kendall and Logan, he got the last name Garcia. We signed his birth certificate and that was that.
A year later…
"By order of the state of California, the divorce ordered between Carlos Garcia and Logan Mitchell has been accepted and finalized," The judge said. "Each side
And there it was. I was officially divorced and now single. I didn't know how to feel about it, but I wasn't all depressed and stuff. Logan is just a guy…Why is he walking over to me?
"I just hope we can stay friends," He said.
I was done being bitter about Logan.
"Sure," I smiled.
He pulled me into a hug.
"Thanks for understanding Carlos," he whispered.
What did he mean by that? Kendall and James came over to me with the kids.
"We've got to go out to celebrate," Kendall said.
"Yeah, you're single now!" James pointed out.
"Daddy!" Evan ran over to him.
Evan is just a year old, so when he moves its wobbly and it's a little scary for me, but he loves his Daddy, just like the rest of his kids.
"Hey buddy," Logan kissed his cheek. "Papa's going out with his friends, but it's just me and your sister, so do you want to go out with us?"
Half-sister…
"Yeah!" Evan smiled.
He's such a happy little kid, he doesn't even know. Ethan and Emma haven't changed, but you can tell that they miss Logan and realize that we didn't work out.
"What about us?" Ethan pouted.
"Of course you can go with us," Logan smiled. "Do you want to go too, Jade? Adam?"
"Yeah, Uncle Logie," she smiled.
I was waiting for Kendall to object, but that was his daughter. He has a right to her, and besides like he said, it was just him and his daughter. I'm was still waiting for the objection to Adam going, but it never came.
To none of ours surprise, Dak was caught not too long after he learned her was pregnant and he got another 20 years in prison. When Lorelei was born, Dak was released just to have her, and then she was turned over to Logan and Dak went back to the pen…Logan is faithful to him though. She's a cute little baby, I'll admit that, but it still didn't feel right.
"I'll have them home by 6," Logan said. "I'd like to spend the day with them if it's okay with you guys."
"Sure Logan," I nodded.
He smiled and then walked away with all six kids. After he was gone, I turned to Kendall.
"I'm surprised you let that happen," I chuckled.
"To be honest, I feel kind of bad for him," Kendall said. "I don't like him, but I do feel bad for him."
"You're starting to get over what he did," I gave a childish grin.
"…Let's just go eat," he laughed.
Another 2 years later…
My alarm clock went off, causing me to groan as I got up. It was Ethan's first day of school and neither of us were looking forward to it. My first born is five years old and starting school today, I'm getting old.
I got out of bed and walked to his room, opening the door. He was sleeping soundly in his bed. I shook him awake.
"Ethan, time to get up for school," I said.
"I don't want to go," he tried to hide under his blanket.
I pulled the blanket back.
"I want to stay here with you," he said.
"And I want you to stay here with me too, but you have to go because it's the law and I don't want you to grow up stupid," I pulled him out of the bed. "Now let's go eat breakfast."
"I don't mind being stupid," He grabbed my hand as we walked down the stairs.
I don't know why he still does that at five years old, but any way I can stay connected to his childhood, I'll take.
"Well, if we're lucky you'll be as smart as your daddy," I chuckled.
"Not possible," I heard a voice.
"Daddy!" Ethan's eyes brightened as he ran over to Logan, who was sitting on the couch.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, amused.
I'm over Logan…completely. I'm okay with being friends with him, and I've moved on, Kendall and James even set me up on a date tonight for the first time since Logan…I still remember that conversation.
"Come on Carlos, you need to get back into the sea so a sexy fish can catch you," James sat down next to me. "Forget about Logan."
"I'm over Logan," I said. "I just need my kids, and I don't feel like going through the steps all over again. Besides, who wants to date someone with three kids? One kid, sure. Two, maybe, but THREE? Not gonna happen."
"It's been three years," Kendall said. "If you were really over Logan, you would go on this date…"
"Fine! Set it up," I was not going to win. "Who is this guy anyway…"
I guess I'll find out tonight.
"It's my sons first day of school…did you think I would forget?" Logan laughed.
"Of course Dr. Mitchell won't forget anything with his huge brain," I joked. "Where's Lori?"
"Eating breakfast in the kitchen, I came in and made breakfast, hope that was cool…"
"Sure, it's fine," I shrugged.
So, Logan still has his key after three years…and I still haven't changed the locks after three years. The other kids got up and made their way downstairs, happy to see their daddy. After Ethan was done eating, we got him ready and called Katie over to watch the others.
Ethan cried as we got in the car, which broke my heart. Logan drove because if it was me, I would've turned around and taken him back home, hiding him in a closet for eternity.
"Ethan, it's nothing to worry about," Logan said. "Kindergarten is fun, and you get nap time."
"I don't want nap time!" Ethan shot back.
"Let's see if you still say that in high school," I muttered.
"We really should've enrolled him in preschool, so he could get used to other kids and stuff," Logan said.
I shrugged. Nothing we could do about it now. When we pulled up to the school, Ethan was crying even harder. Logan got him out of the car and each of us grabbed one of his hands. I don't want him to go, but I need to calm him down.
"You'll have lots of fun," I said. "Kindergarten is where I met daddy, and uncle Kenny and James."
"Yeah, you'll make tons of friends," Logan added.
"They have blocks, and coloring books, and legos and any other toys you can think of," I said.
We reached his class and his teacher was standing at the door.
"Hello, I am Mrs. Munsen," his teacher introduced herself. "And who do we have here?"
"Hi," Logan and I smiled and shook her hand.
"This is little Ethan," Logan said.
"He's a little scared," I added.
He was sniffling and still crying a bit.
"Well, Ethan…do you like blocks?" Mrs. Munsen asked.
"Yes," Ethan said quietly.
"…What about coloring?"
Ethan nodded.
"Do you like legos?" she asked.
He nodded again. Mrs. Munsen pointed inside the room and Ethan looked, seeing a huge pile of legos and blocks. He smiled through his tears.
"Would you like to come inside?" Mrs. Munsen gave such a warm smile.
Ethan smiled back in response and nodded.
"Go ahead inside," Logan smiled. "We'll be right here when you get out of school."
"And we love you," I added.
Ethan nodded, giving each of us a hug before running inside. Logan and I smiled as we watched him introduce himself to some kids and start playing with him. We walked out to the parking lot and got back to the car.
"I think he'll be alright," Logan said.
"Yeah, and he'll be like you," I chuckled. "Really smart…"
"Very smart," Logan corrected.
"Can it, Mitchell," I laughed.
That night…
"How was little munchkins first day?" James asked as he opened my car door.
"It was great," I said. "Logan, really helped me out this morning, but he loved it!"
"Cool, so you're looking for Joshua Jenkins," James said.
"Thanks for setting it up," I said.
"We got your back," James said. "Now have fun tonight."
I'm having so much fun with this guy. Joshua is funny, friendly, and really hot. He has blonde hair and blue eyes and he has a really cute smile. I'm really digging him, I just hope he's digging me.
"So, what are your kid's names?" He asked.
"Well my oldest son's name is Ethan; he's five. I'm also taking care of my ex-husbands daughter; she's four. And my youngest son is named Evan; he's three," I said.
"So, you take care of your ex-husband's daughter?" Josh asked.
Oh gosh, don't hate me.
"Yeah, I know it's weird," I said. "She's like my daughter though and her biological father is father is really bad."
"Oh right, Dak Zevon? I heard about that case," he nodded. "I think it's kind of sweet that you'd do that for a child that isn't even yours."
When he smiled, I smiled back.
"So, you don't hate me for having three kids already? I have so much baggage," I laughed.
"No, I love kids," Joshua smiled. "I would actually like to go out again."
"I would like that too," I smiled.
Another 2 years…
"I know pronounce you husband and husband, you may kiss your groom," The pastor said.
I smiled as I leaned in to kiss Joshua. I'm now officially Carlos Jenkins. I can't believe we're married, but I love him and he loves me. He loves the kids, and they love him, and my friends love him. He's a great friend, person, and boyfriend now I just have to hope he makes a good husband.
"I love you," he whispered before kissing me again.
The audience clapped. Everyone that I loved was here, including Logan, which kind of surprised me because I could obviously tell that he was jealous, but it was kind of funny to me. James insists that he misses me, but I've already been down that road.
The reception is a blast right now, I'm having so much fun. I didn't get to enjoy my first wedding reception on account of Ethan, but this one is a blast. Speaking of Ethan, here he comes now.
"Papa, when can I get some cake?" He asked.
"We still have to cut it," I laughed. "Where is your dad?"
"He's talking to auntie Camille."
"I'll be right back babe," I kissed Josh before getting up.
I walked over to Logan and Camille.
"Hey you two," I smiled.
"Hey, if it isn't the groom," Camille hugged me.
"Congratulations Carlos, this is a reception done right," Logan patted my back.
"Thanks for coming you two," I chuckled. "He makes me happy."
"Hey, we can tell," Logan said. "Just don't let him steal my kids from me."
We all laughed, but it probably wasn't a joke.
"So, when are you two going to pop the first kid?" Camille asked.
"Whoa, let's not go there," I laughed. "I'm happy with my three munchkins, but if Josh wants a kid of his own, I'll give it to him."
"Oh, Carlos, I need to talk to you about something," Logan pulled me to the side.
"What's up Loges?" I asked.
"…I'm moving back to Minnesota," he said.
"You're what?" I asked.
"Yeah," he nodded. "There isn't much out here for me anymore and I just want to be home. I'm going to be living in my parent's old house. They aren't getting any younger and they need me there, so I'll be there."
"What about the kids?" I asked.
"They can come visit whenever they want, or I can come visit them, I just can't L.A. anymore," he shrugged.
"Well, we'll miss you," I said truthfully.
I really would, and even though Kendall won't admit it, he will too. The kids definitely will, but I guess this is his choice.
"Are you being sarcastic?" he asked.
"No, I really will," I laughed. "When do you leave?"
"Tomorrow," he said.
"Why didn't you say anything before now?" my eyes widened.
"I just didn't want anyone to pay much attention to me," he said.
"Logan, I know things haven't been the best for you, but we still care," I said. "We would've liked to have known."
"Where are the kids? I want to say goodbye to them."
And then he just walked off, and that was the last time I saw Logan Mitchell.
13 years later…
"Pops, are we almost there? I don't want to miss Dad," Evan said. "We're the only four not there!"
"Evan, calm down," I laughed. "We're almost there, and Logan isn't going to miss your birthday for anything, especially this one."
"Yeah, we're less than five minutes away," Joshua said.
"Are Ethan and Emma going to be there?" Jack, our 12 year old asked.
"Yes," I nodded.
Jack had Blonde hair, but my eyes. Three kids later and I still have a pretty good body for my age, so with that said, I'm done having kids. We finally pulled into the driveway of Logan's house. I don't know why we decided to have this party in Minnesota, oh yeah because Evan requested it.
We all got out of the car and walked up to the door. I opened it and everyone yelled HAPPY BIRTHDAY EVAN. Everyone was here. All of our parents were here, Kendall and James, Jett and Trevor, Logan, Lori, Ethan, Emma, Erika, Adam and Alex, and Jade.
"Happy birthday son," Logan smiled as he hugged him.
"Thanks Dad," Evan smiled.
"Alright the birthday boy is here, let's get this party started!" Kendall yelled.
Everyone cheered and the music started. I could tell that Evan was really happy. The only people he sees on a daily basis is me, Kendall, James, Josh, and Jack, so seeing everyone else like his siblings and his father makes him really happy.
I'm really proud of Evan because like Logan, he graduated as the valedictorian, something that I thought Ethan would do, but Ethan was in the top 20 of his class and now he attends UM. Emma also did great in school and she goes to college in New York, and next week Evan is leaving me to come to school here, so really it's just me, my husband, and my last born.
I can't believe that Evan is 18. The last 18 years of my life have been a series of ups and downs with Logan and just kids growing up, but I can still look at all of the people in this room and it makes me smile.
And we partied all night. Eventually, I needed a break and stepped out into the night onto the porch, where Logan was.
"Hey Logan, long time no see," I walked up next to him.
"Oh hey Los," He smiled. "How have you been?"
Seriously, since Logan moved I've only seen him twice, and the last time was 5 years ago.
"Great," I smiled. "I see age is catching up with you."
He laughed.
"Whatever," He rolled his eyes. "So, Dak finally comes home tomorrow."
"Really?" I asked. "I thought he had 20 years?"
"He lost two for good behavior," Logan shrugged. "Lorelei is really excited."
"I bet," I smiled. "She loves him doesn't she?"
"Of course she does," he said. "It tends to happen when you're separated from someone so close to you."
"…And how do you feel about it?" I asked.
"It's whatever to me," He shrugged.
I was surprised he was honest to me.
"I sense it's more than whatever…You seem off."
"Carlos, it's nothing," he lied.
"Still the same? Thinks we can't read you, come on we used to be the best of friends, just talk to me," I pleaded.
He was silent for a few minutes and we just looked out at the stars.
"I'm terrified," he said eventually. "I've never loved him, I've been forced to stay with him all of these years. He has people watching me."
"So, why do you stay with him?" I asked.
"Didn't you hear me? I have to. That's why I left LA, to protect the kids, and…you."
"Me?" I raised an eyebrow.
"Yes, Carlos," he sighed. "Before Dak got caught, he abused me still, he even forced me to impregnate him. Not that I don't love Lori because she's the only person I've had for the past 18 years, but I didn't want to have a baby with him. That's all going to continue when he gets home."
"You can just leave him," I suggested. "Come to L.A. and stay with us…Josh won't mind," I said.
"I can't do that," Logan sighed. "You really don't understand what Dak is capable of…"
"This is all my fault," I realized, out loud.
"No it isn't," Logan insisted.
"If I had never sent you out to get those snacks 21 years ago, Dak would've never gotten to you," I said. "And you wouldn't be stuck with him."
"It was only a matter of time…"
"Just come live with us?" I pleaded. "I'm a cop, I can protect you!"
"I can't do that, I'll be intruding on you and your husband and child," Logan said. "It'll be an issue."
"How would it be an issue?"
"It's stupid…"Logan said.
"If there's one thing I know, it's that Logan Mitchell is not stupid, so what is the issue?"
"It's because I still love you, Carlos!" He screamed a little too loud.
…I was frozen. I wasn't expecting that. Like, seriously?
"What?"
"I know it's stupid and it's been 18 years, but I can't get over you and all that time with Dak and all of these years I continued to think about you," Logan admitted, tears rolling down his face. "I never meant to hurt you, but he made me leave. Life could've been so much different for both of us, but…I just….i'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything."
"No, I'm glad you said it," I said. "But Logan, you could've said something, I could've helped you. I don't love you like that anymore, but I do still love you as a friend and I want to see you happy. I just can't be with you now. I have a child and I love Josh very much."
"I know," he sighed.
"You aren't going home with Dak," I finally decided. "You and Lori are coming to live with us and I dare Dak to do anything about it…I'm not the same person I used to be, you made me stronger and I'm not giving up on you."
"Carlos, please," Logan pleaded. "He'll hurt you."
"Then take care of Jack with Josh for me," I said sternly. "Because you're coming to live with us and that's an order."
"I'm not doing it," He said. "I really can't, just always remember me."
I pulled him into a hug and wiped his tears for him.
"Fine," I sighed. "But, remember that the offer still stands whenever you need it."
"Thank you Los," he said. "You've always been good to me even when I broke your heart."
"I forgave you a long time ago," I said. "Now get happy, it's our final sons 18th birthday."
Logan laughed.
"Can you believe it?" I asked. "We raised three kids from birth into adulthood, and all of them turned out pretty good."
"It seems like just yesterday that I was holding Ethan in my arms for the first time, and now Evan is grown up," Logan said. "And Lori is right behind him."
"It's crazy how life plays out huh? We had all of these plans for the future that we talked about as a kid and life didn't turn out as planned, but it did turn out alright," I smiled fondly staring at the stars.
"Yeah, I'm still can't believe we raised kids right, especially you," Logan chuckled. "You did it, Carlos."
"No…" I smirked at him. "We did it…together."
And that is it! I really enjoyed writing this and I know it was lengthy, but I wanted it to be thorough...and now we know what happens if Logan goes with Dak, even though this was from Carlos' POV.
Please please please review and let me know what you thought! I really want to know if I did this request justice or not lol.
There's also a new Unbroken Feelings chapter so we can continue the real storyline!
