Please return to me

Chapter 1 – My great loss

A/N: I don't expect this story to have many readers, because, well, it's a story were Chris starts out dead, that's not the best way to attract reviewers. But who says death is permanent in Charmed universe? Well, just a thought… ;)

Disclaimer: I don't own Charmed and I know you know that.

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A flower bucket…

Piper couldn't bring herself to let go of it. It was the only thing she had here for support. She looked around the place. It was spring, the birds were singing merrily and there were cherry blossoms spread on the ground.

It was warm around her and the gentle breeze of wind was wonderful, but she hardly took notice of it all. She wore a long black coat, but still she was freezing. Not for the weather but for the sight in front of her.

It was a grave.

It was not very special, looked like most others in the surroundings. The tombstone was of a simple white marble and there was not a lot of text on it.

But the person it belonged to was very special.

2004-2012 was written underneath the name.

Only 8 short years were the time she had had to spend with this person.

Today was the 14th of April 2016. Today, exactly four years ago her youngest son's life had brutally been stolen by a demon who hadn't even known his name.

Four years and the pain was still as fresh and strong as it had been on the first day.

The flowers fell from her hands down onto the tiny grave. She dropped to her knees and started crying uncontrollably.

Someone had told her once that she needed to move on, someday it would be alright, but she knew better. This would never be alright. Her baby boy was dead and nothing could change that.

Thinking about it always made her cry again. When his older self from the future had died she had always wanted to see her baby growing up to be this brave young man she had got to know for 1 1/2 years. But her baby hadn't even reached the age of 10. It was so unfair.

The tears intensified when she looked at the small grave she was sitting in front of. He had only been 1,10 meters high when it had happened. So small. She always thought of how much he missed. He would never have a family, never learn to drive never make it to his high school prom.

Sobbing she picked up the flowers off the floor and draped them carefully on the grave. She came here almost every week if she could make it, but every month at least. It was the only thing that gave her the feeling of being close to her son, even if she wasn't.

She cried even more, when she remembered that fateful day 4 years ago when her little boy's life had been ended…

Flashback

"Mommy, can you help me with my math homework?", Chris asked while he was running down the stairs.

"I told you not to run inside of the manor Chris, all the things standing here are very old and you could break them if you aren't careful. Besides, the stairs without shoes is a big no, don't you see how easily you could fall off?", Piper scolded. She never really managed to teach her sons these simple things which was highly frustrating for her. But at least they became very good at collecting arguments for their point of view.

"Well, mom, I don't see how any item inside this house could not have been replaced at least twice with all the demon attacks so they're definitely not old, and there is carpet on the stairs so the odds of slipping and falling are very low. Besides, I've done that all my life so by now I know how to run down the stairs the proper way", he said without hesitation. He had told her the exact same things over and over many times, but she just didn't seem to buy it. He had no idea why, all these arguments were very logical to him.

"But you didn't answer my question, can you help me with my math homework now?", he repeated.

Piper just rolled her eyes. He was in the second grade in elemental school, and he was very intelligent, he never had any real problems with homework, the only thing he had trouble with was his never ending laziness. "Chris, you can do them on your own, I'm certain of that", she told him.

"But they're so complicated, I don't understand it", he insisted and put on his puppy dog eyes that were totally irresistible.

Irresistible to everyone but his mother. "Don't try to manipulate me, young man, it's not gonna work. You need to learn to do things on your own or you're never going to have success in life, so go upstairs and finish them, I can look over it for you when you're done", Piper offered with a face of stone that told her son he did not have any chance to get her help on these homework.

But very fortunate for him this was just the moment his father chose to orb in the living room.

"Hello Daddy", Chris greeted him and ran to him to give him a hug. This instantly put a smile on Leo's face. He was always happy to see both his sons loved him, especially after all the trouble he had had with older Chris. He was proud to have corrected the mistakes his other timeline's self had made.

"Hey little guy", he said and stroke his hair.

"Daddy can you help me with my math homework? I don't understand it and Mommy's too busy", Chris asked again with his puppy dog eyes.

Piper instantly knew that this totally screwed up all her efforts to teach her son how to do things on his own. Leo was always wax in Chris' hands, when Chris did this look.

And she was right. Without hesitation her husband replied, "Of course I'll help you"

"Leo", Piper growled in a low voice that told her husband he was doing something wrong.

"What?", he asked innocently and wore a look on his face that resembled a huge teddy bear. Why were all the men in her life so cute? She never stood a chance to be a good mother if they could all manipulate her so easily.

"Chris needs to learn to do things on his own", she said anyway. She had years of experience to be impervious to their cuteness.

Leo immediately blushed and put an apologetic look on his face. Then he said, "Come on Piper, just once, it won't hurt"

Piper rolled her eyes and sighed. "Ok" She was scolding herself on the inside. Why did she always let go so easily? No wonder her children grew up to be such spoiled brats, it was all her fault. And partly Leo's, she reminded herself.

"Great" Chris said and ran up the stairs, Leo close behind him. Piper shook her head and went to the conservatory. Sometimes she envied her husband that he got to spend so much time with their children, while she always needed to work.

Suddenly she was in a mood to bake cookies to have some quality time with her family who all adored her cooking.

But I can't, she reminded herself and her good mood dropped. She had to do paperwork for P3. In the 21 century you would have thought the paperwork would be less and everything would be automatic with computers, but instead the paperwork became more, just not on regular paper anymore but instead on computers.

So she spent the beautiful spring afternoon inside doing bills and databanks on her laptop. Really just wonderful…

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"Piper?", Leo asked and entered the conservatory.

"Yeah?", she replied without even taking her eyes off the screen. Something was wrong with this expense, but she could not pinpoint what. But no matter how often she calculated 7 minus 4 did not equal 251 like her laptop wanted her to believe.

"We're done with that homework…", he started but Piper cut him off.

"The one you shouldn't have participated in doing in the first place?", she asked in a friendly tone, but Leo knew she was still angry.

"Well, yeah, but anyway, we're done, and Wyatt and Chris were asking if I could got to the attic with them a little to help them practice their powers. So I just wanted to know if you're ok with that", he explained in a very quiet tone, careful not to make her angry in any way.

"I am. So what?", she asked and still kept looking on the screen. After some alterations by her the calculation no longer equaled 251 but now 708. That made even less sense. Or maybe she was getting old.

"Uh well, the thing is, the Elder's called me and I'm supposed to be in a meeting now, so I was wondering whether you could help them practice", he said hesitantly.

Now Piper finally looked up. "Ok, maybe getting my head off this mess is going to help"

He smiled at her gratefully. "Thanks", he said and orbed out. Piper stood up and stretched a little. She had been sitting in front of this thing way too long. She walked up the stairs to see that her two boys were already in the attic.

"Hey you two", she said when she entered the room.

"Hey mom", both of them replied.

"Look what I can do", Wyatt said and threw up his shield. It covered the entire attic. He had never done one so big yet.

Piper was impressed and said, "Very good Wyatt"

Chris just snorted and used his telekinesis to throw his brother off his feet. While Wyatt was landing on his butt Chris said, "Shields are boring"

Wyatt glared at his younger brother and threw a small shield in his direction that knocked him off his feet. "Shield's may be boring, but they sure are useful", he said with a triumphant look on his face.

"Boys, I told you so many times, don't use your powers on each other", Piper got in between. Both of them shot her a look of annoyance that was exactly the same. "We were just having fun, mom", Chris whined while Wyatt said, "No one got hurt!"

"Still, you two have to learn to be more responsible with your powers. And you can't use them on each other", Piper said with a look of steel on her face.

"Ok ok", they both said in unison and looked in opposite directions.

Piper was just about to say something more to them as a demon chose that exact moment to shimmer in.

Wyatt immediately threw up his shield to surround the two boys, while Piper glared at the demon.

"You guys are annoying, you know that?", she asked rhetorically, before blowing him up. Wyatt put his shield down again. "Isn't there some way to stop them from coming here? Permanently?", he asked while observing the new scorch mark on the rock that already had many fellows there.

"Well, if we used something like that, they would just shimmer elsewhere, like on the street where they could hurt innocents when they can't get to us, so it's better if they go here, where we can fend them off", Piper explained.

Chris was not very interested in the demons, they were merely annoying for him. He walked to the back of the attic where the book of shadows lay, to see whether this demon had an entry and if so he could cross it off. It was a habit of his always to cross out the demons that were already vanquished.

While he was flipping through the pages, a demon shimmered in behind him without making a noise. Neither Chris nor Piper and Wyatt noticed the demons presence.

Just as Chris had found the right page he felt a sudden pain. A lot of pain. Before he could even see what was going on he felt a scream of agony leave his lips. He looked down at himself just in time to see the athame that had been plunged into his chest being pulled out again.

Piper watched in horror as her baby boy dropped to the floor. She felt her heart stop when she saw all the blood. Instinctively she blew the demon up than she rushed next to her son, with Wyatt hot on her trail.

"Leo, Chris is hurt", she screamed as loud as she could, while she was trying to hide from Wyatt how terrified she was. Why did her sons always have to be hurt like this? Why did she always have to have the fear one of them wouldn't wake up again, while other mothers' only concern was the best way to drive their kids to baseball practice?

Wyatt looked at his mother in fear and asked, "He's gonna be ok, right? Daddy can fix this, right?" His voice was trembling slightly. He was really scared.

Piper nodded, unable to articulate a word. She touched her son's neck to feel for a pulse, but she couldn't find one. You're just doing it wrong Piper, of course there is a pulse. There has to be, she tried to calm herself, but she was not so sure if that was right. "Leo!", she screamed again.

Finally her husband orbed in with a look of concern on his face. "What's wrong?", he asked.

"Heal", his wife just commanded without taking her eyes off her youngest son.

Leo's eyes grew wide as he saw all the blood on the floor, but he immediately obeyed.

As he bent down and let the golden glow illuminate from his hands he immediately knew something was wrong. He became even more scared but tried to ignore the thoughts of what was maybe happening. He just tried to concentrate on the healing while his older son and wife were watching breathlessly.

After several seconds of healing that should have been enough usually there was still no effect of his healing. He knew deep inside what this meant, he knew the exact feeling and its consequence, but he refused to believe that was the case now. He concentrated even harder and watched the golden glow intensify. It had to work, it simply had to.

He remained that way for over a minute, unable to see the obvious. Wyatt and Piper both watched in fear and prayed to whatever force was out there that it would still work and in a second Chris would be sitting up and asking why they were all so pale.

But he never did.

Slowly Leo realized his defeat. He felt tears well up in the eyes as the harsh realization sunk in. It didn't work. It wouldn't anymore. Chris was gone…

Slowly his hands sank down on their own accord and a lonely tear began running down his cheek.

Piper stared at Leo and commanded in a high pitched voice, "Go on, heal!"

He looked her in the eye and she saw the emotions on his face tell her everything she needed to know. But this couldn't be right. It simply had to be wrong. Slowly he shook his head and said, " ' doesn't work…"

He started sobbing and stared at Chris' body.

Piper looked at him in disbelief. "No", she said. She felt tears on her face. She knew he was telling the truth. She looked down at her son's body and said, "No", again. Then she started crying hard. "Oh please no peanut, no", she babbled.

Wyatt's eyes were fixed on his little brother. It felt absolutely impossible what his parents were saying there. No, Chris couldn't be dead, he simply couldn't. He couldn't have left forever. But he had…

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4 days later the nightmare had become reality for everyone.

Wyatt sat on a seat in the second row, distant from everyone else. He didn't want to talk, he couldn't.

His mother sat in the front row his mother was crying. Wyatt could only see her back shaking and he knew how hard this was for her. Leo sat next to her. He would've comforted her, but he couldn't. He couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that his little boy should be gone forever. That he lost Chris for the second time now. That he would never see him at 22 becoming the man he had known. He was unable to accept that both of them were gone, future Chris and now his Chris as well.

On the other side of the row Wyatt saw his aunts. Paige was crying in her hand silently, while Phoebe was staring at the front with tears running down her face slowly.

Next to him sat his grandpa. Wyatt had left the two seats between them empty. He was not able to talk to anyone, and so he wanted to sit alone were no one would be trying to engage him in a conversation.

Grandpa was trying to put on a brave face but failed miserably at that. His face was red and it was evident that he had cried.

In the other rows were people Wyatt didn't really care about. He saw Darryl and Sheila and recognized some of Chris' teachers in the back rows as well as some of Chris classmates.

It was the funeral.

At the front there was it. A small coffin made of oak wood with loads of flowers on its top. In front of it someone had put a photo of Chris were he was smiling broadly.

A slow sad music was playing. Then a man made a speech were he said some things about how Chris had been so young and stuff, but Wyatt didn't listen.

It was just a small box. How could Chris be in there? Wasn't he cold? How could he not be around tomorrow? How was it possible that he wouldn't throw a pillow into Wyatt's face tomorrow to wake him up how he always used to? How could he never talk to him again?

He felt very lonely now. He was all alone in the house now? How was he supposed to cope with the emptiness of the house, of their shared room? What was he going to do all alone now?

It was unbelievable for him. He didn't really notice the tears clouding his vision, he was too lost in his thoughts. Chris was eight. Had been eight. That was no age to die. That was barely an age to bind your own shoes so how could he be gone now? He was so small.

And it was all because of magic.

Wyatt was certain, had there been no magic in the lives of the Halliwells, Chris would still be alive. If none of them had had powers the demon would have never shimmered into the attic and he wouldn't have had the chance to do what he did.

He knew that his logic was flawed. If not for magic his mom and dad would never have met and both he and Chris would never have existed but he didn't care. The only thing that mattered was that Chris was dead now, because of magic.

It was just then Wyatt made a promise to himself.

He would never use magic again, no potions, no spells and no powers. It was the least he could do to honor Chris' memory. He didn't mind about possible consequences. If demons came Piper could just blow them up, if he needed to go somewhere he could just walk or take the bus like other kids, he didn't need to orb.

Half an hour later the funeral was over.

Wyatt stared at the small hill were his brother had just been buried. He had tears in his eyes as he threw a flower onto the hill. Goodbye Chris, he thought.

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Wyatt stared at the calendar in the kitchen. 4 years. He could barely believe how long it had been. And he still missed his younger brother the way he had from the very first day on. He would've been 12 by now. Wyatt would've loved to see him at that age. Or any age that was older than 8 in fact. But he would never get the chance.

He poured himself some milk with his eyes still fixed on the calendar. He could feel tears in his eyes, but he couldn't cry now. It was a school day and he would have to go there. He was absolutely not in the mood for that.

His aunt Paige walked in and looked at the table. "Uh, Wyatt", she said and pointed to were he was holding the milk carton.

He looked there and realized he had not hit the cup with the milk but only poured everything on the table. "Whoops", he said and started looking for a sponge to wipe it off again.

"Do you know where Piper is?", Paige asked and started the coffee machine.

Wyatt hesitated for a moment. Then he just said, "It's the fourteenth of April" He couldn't bring himself to say that his mother was probably at the graveyard. He just hated the way that sounded and had always hated the fact that his brother was there. But that was nothing new.

"Oh", Paige said and immediately felt uncomfortable. Of course, she should've known.

It was just then Piper stepped through the front door. She was wearing her only black coat and this was the only day of the year she did that.

Wyatt looked up and they had eye contact for a moment. They both knew exactly what the other thought. No words exchanged, none were needed. Paige didn't know what to say, so she kept quiet.

Until a shriek from above caught the three's attention.

"Demon in the attic!", Phoebe screamed. Paige immediately took Piper's hand and orbed them both upstairs. Wyatt stood up and rushed up the stairs immediately. He had kept his promise not to use magic and he also didn't want to hitchhike with other people's orbs. But he needed to know what demon had the boldness to show up at Halliwell manor on this particular day.

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When they rematerialized Piper saw the demon standing there. It was a female demon who was wearing a long dark red skirt and an olive shirt, a combination that oddly enough suited her very well. And even weirder she was waving a white tissue.

She immediately looked at Piper and Paige. "Oh glad you're here. I'm sorry about this", she said and pointed to the tissue, "but I simply didn't have a white flag."

"Why would you need a white flag?", Paige asked confused. This was new. No demon had so far waved a white flag at them. She was absolutely not in a mood for demons right now, and she didn't want to upset Piper even more than this day already brought on on its own.

"Because I want to talk to you", the demon said smiling.

"Why would you want to do that?", Paige replied.

"Well, I'm a seer and I'm sure I have some information you would like to have", the demon explained still smiling.

Piper looked at her with the coldest glare she could manage and replied simply, "We don't make deals with demons."

The demon looked Piper in the eye without breaking underneath her stare. "Not even if the demon told you your son is still alive?"

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A/N: Well, so what do you think of it?

This story is really against my usual stuff to do, I once said I didn't like writing about the changed future, but here I am doing just that. And I also don't like to write flashbacks, but now I did one. And there are probably going to be more of them throughout the story.

Well, please review!