Warnings: Well aside from a tacky dressed Vegeta there's not a whole lot to be warned of. Um that and one minor swear.

Disclaimer: I don't own DB/Z/GT, the characters, nor the DBZ world. I don't make ANY money what-so-ever off these fics either.

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Okay, I have nothin against golf...I really like it. But the idea of Vegeta dressed like a golfer was too hilarious. I'm sorry! I couldn't help myself!

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Vegeta was bored, that's the only explination he could come up with. Nobody to spar, gravity machine down. What was he supposed to do, go for a walk? So anyways, there poor lonely Vegeta was sitting at home flipping channels randomly. There was never anything on. Cartoons, talk shows? He stopped on one of those.

"My dog ran off with my wife and the toaster oven tried to put the moves on me." Vegeta mumbled. "Nope, already seen it." he muttered changing the channel quickly. As luck would have it it was a golf game. Vegeta actually didn't flip the channel immediatly.

The golfer hit the ball with amazing accuracy. Vegeta just snorted, "Doesn't look so hard." he thought about it. It kinda looked fun...

"Ah, hell with it." Vegeta chuckled. "I'll show Bulma I do more than eat, sleep, and train."

-Later-

Vegeta stormed into the building standing infront of the top class golf course. The manager glanced up at Vegeta. After that all he could do was stare in shock. Vegeta was wearing a tacky, checkered yellowish brown vest. His pants were a faded neon green. And a small pink hat sat, schichkabobbed on his spikey hair.

"Sir we only allow people of..." he was cut off by Vegeta grabbing his neck. "Your fine style on the course."

"I want to play, uh..." Vegeta stuttered, he realized he didn't know the name of the game. ~Damnit.~ He thought. ~It was just on the outside of this building.~ "Just let me play!" Vegeta roared.

"But sir..." the poor manager tried to explain, "You have no clubs."

"I don't care!" Vegeta yelled sending the man into a state of terror. "Just get me started."

The poor man handed him a score card and one of those cheap pencils, "I don't suppose you'll be playing by yourself?"

"No! The King of the Sayians doesn't have to play with any low life forms such as humans." Vegeta replied cockily.

"Fine." the manager wimpered taking shelter under the counter.

Vegeta stomped out onto the course, that's when it occured to him he was the only one without one of those handy bags. So Vegeta walked up to the nearest man. "I'll need those." he said grabbing the bag.

The man started to protest, but by the time he was halfway through his sentence he was halfway to China courtesy of a chi attack.

Now that he had golf clubs, and his score card, (not to mention the cheap pencil) he wondered where to go. Not knowing he started to examin the bag. Inside one of the small pockets he found several of the white balls that people where hitting. Taking them all out he sat them on the ground. "Haha!" he laughed, those novices are so inexpierenced they can only hit one!" He smuggly said. He watched one of the nearby golfers on one of the holes (he was still in front of the golf house.) "I'll need a stick though." Vegeta mumbled turning back to the bag.

At the top of the bag. Where several iron lumps. "I wonder if these will work." Vegeta muttered. He pulled on one and found that it had a long base. "Why do I get the deformed sticks?" Vegeta growled.

Vegeta turned back to watch the golfer. He swung the club and hit the little white ball considerably far. "Fore!" (I believe I spelled that right.) he yelled.

"Hahahaha!" Vegeta chuckled arrogantly, "Is that the highest number you know how to count to?" he yelled. "Watch this!" He took all his golf balls and grouped them together, with a mighty swing he hit a good many of them, "Infinity!" he yelled. Unfortunatly, along with the balls, he also let the golf club fly.

From in the distance a very distinct "Ouch!" was heard.

"Dang." Vegeta muttered pulling another club out of his bag (coincidently he got the putter out. By the way, he still hasn't even gotten to the first hole.) A balding, passing stranger shot Vegeta a questioning look, and soon the stranger had even less hair thanks to a helpful chi blast.

Vegeta, deciding that he would go play golf on the grass, went over to the fifth hole, which was near the club house. A few people were already playing there. Vegeta not giving a second thought played through.

"Hey!" one angry man protested. "You can't just play where ever you like!"

Vegeta, so calm it was almost scary walked over to the man. "What's your name?" he asked slinging his arm around the poor man's shoulder.

"Um...Bob." the man replied.

"Well Bob..." Vegeta said then suddenly jerked him up by the collar, "What do you say we play a round of...um...this game?"

"Somebody call the authorities!" Bob screamed struggling to keep from being strangled.

"Well?" Vegeta asked almost nicely.

"Okay!" Bob shrieked.

"Man, even Bulma can't scream like that." Vegeta mumbled.

-Later-

"It's going to rain." Bob said staring at the sky.

"That's nice, how am I doing?" Vegeta asked sarcastically.

"Um...your currently -12." Bob said wisely, Vegeta was actually +56. (- are good + are bad. (I think... ^.^)

"I am good!" Vegeta exaulted chopping away at the ball. But to no avail, he simply managed to hit the grass and uproot it.

"Um...you know, you really ought to replace your divots." Bob said.

"Why bother?" Vegeta huffed. Indeed, the ground around him was already reduced to simply dirt.

"Because it's proper ettiquette." Bob managed weakly.

Vegeta was about to say something, but he hit the ball. It started to go very far. "Alright!" Vegeta cheered "Infinity! I'm gonna make a hole-in...How many am I up to?!" he asked watching the ball.

*Plop.* It sank to the bottom of the water hazard.

Bob just groaned. "Why'd ya say infinity?"

"Arn't you supposed to yell the highest number you can think of?" Vegeta asked.

"No, it's just a warning to other golfers." Bob replied.

"Well, in that case why don't you just yell watch out?" Vegeta asked.

Bob simply groaned again.

Vegeta actually went down into the water to get the ball.

"I hope your not actually thinking of hitting the ball from where it's lying!" Bob yelled.

Before Bob could say much else he was showered with an enourmous amount of water. He looked around to see Vegeta holding back the water somehow, preparing to hit the ball.

"Um...kay." Bob said resisting the urge to faint.

Amazingly Vegeta actually hit the ball out of the water.

"INCOMING!" he yelled. Then the water returned to it's normal place, though it was a good ways lower. Bob peered expectantly over the edge waiting for Vegeta to come back up. Only, his face was met with a golf ball.

"Ouch!" he cried rubbing his nose, "That hurt."

He then narrowly dodged a ton of other small white golf balls.

Vegeta came back up to the surface spluttering, "There's a ton of them down there."

Bob just gave him a blank stare, "Well, that's really nice, but you ought to at least make it to the green before it starts to rain."

Vegeta reluctantly got out of the water. He carefully placed his ball down on the grass then...wham...he missed the ball completely. Grumbling to himself he tried again, wham...again a miss. So Bob sat there till on Vegeta's 68th try, he finally hit the ball. An even bigger shock was that it landed pretty close to the hole. As Bob and Vegeta neared the hole, and as Vegeta nearly made the final putt, a sudden rain storm broke down. I don't mean a light shower, I mean all hell broke loose, and on top of that, the storm was accomanied by lightning and thunder.

"NO!" Vegeta cried. He was just mere centimeters from the hole.

-Back at the Club House-

The thunder cracked down outside, and the rain poured down, hacking at the windows. Vegeta, with a newly fried hair do sat sipping coffee (HE may be short, but his hair sure is tall enough. Hint Hint)

"So how good was I?" Vegeta asked smirking.

"Uh, well, you got a 147." Bob trembled, cringing at what he knew was coming.

"And..."

"You only got through one hole..."


END


*Snicker snicker* Poor Vegeta, but hey, at least poor Trunks wasn't the victim in this one. All comments and constructive critisim is welcome below. I was thinking about writing a sequel to this one, but I just don't know if I'd have time to.