A Slytherin Tries to Get Revenge

Rating: G

Summary: What's a Slytherin to do when he can't pull one over on a Hufflepuff?

Spoilers: Well, there is one line from GoF, but that's about it.

A/N: This was written for the Valentine's Day challenge on FictionAlley, although it's 11 months late. (Or a month early, depending on how you look at it).

Disclaimer: Harry Potter belongs to JKR.


"He put a hex on me, Professor Dumbledore, and I was only teasing him, sir, I only said I saw him kissing Florence behind the greenhouses last Thursday."

Dumbledore sighed, "And did you actually see this moment of affection Bertha?" He asked the young Hufflepuff wisely.

"Well, I – "

"Bertha. It was wrong for Mr Dolohov to hex you, but it was also wrong of you to tell lies about him. Now, you won't be punished, but I do suggest that you apologise to Mr Dolohov, and to Florence." He sat back in his chair and stared the young girl down. "Now off you go, before you're late for Charms."

"Yes, Professor."


Antonin was furious. That little mudblood cow had ruined his reputation in front of all his peers. And the scandal had quickly filtered through the school; making him a laughing stalk.

But he had a plan – he was going to get his own back. Rabastan had tried to talk him out of it, said he would only earn himself another detention, but he was going to humiliate that useless Hufflepuff like she had humiliated him.

Bertha Jorkins was going to regret messing with a Slytherin.


Bertha, although she had a lot of trouble keeping her mouth shut, did have a few close friends, whom she admired deeply. And whose opinions she should have taken into consideration when agreeing to join Antonin Dolohov on a trip to Hogsmeade on Valentine's Day.

But Bertha wasn't very bright, you see, and her curiosity almost always got the better of her. And Bertha was very curious in finding out where the Slytherin common room was – and what's easier than finding out from a Slytherin himself?

So, Bertha, being the naive girl that she was, agreed enthusiastically to Antonin's request out side of potions the Wednesday before Valentine's Day, and spent most of the class visualising what to wear instead of concentrating on her Deflating Draught.

Which exploded dramatically fifteen minutes before the class ended.


Antonin was struggling to keep the look of disgust of his face. Surely he had misheard?

"Excuse me?" His voice was a little more exasperated than he would have liked, and his attempts at remaining calm and collected were deteriorating fast.

"I said; we should go to Madame Puddifoot's." Bertha repeated with a sigh, "It is Valentine's Day, after all."

Antonin was starting to wish he had listened to Rabastan. This was not going as planned, and he could see Bellatrix and Narcissa sniggering across the street as Bertha led them towards Madame Puddifoot's ludicrous tea shop – a place where no Slytherin would be seen dead.

"But, I was thinking we could go to the Shrieking Shack." Antonin stammered, and hoped that he wasn't being too transparent in his repugnance of the café that seemed to be lovers central no matter what time of the year it was. He had planned on trapping the mudblood in the shack, semi-naked, if he could repress the urge to vomit, and leaving her there to either catch hypothermia or freezing until one of her mudblood friends (if she had any friends at all) came looking for her.

"The Shrieking Shack isn't romantic," Bertha laughed, grabbing his arm and pulling him into the pink hell hole that was Madame Puddifoot's.

Antonin could here Bellatrix calling Rabastan and Rodolphus over behind him. Yes, this was definitely not going as planned.


Bertha was enjoying herself, which was a surprise. There was only one thing she loved more than gossiping – and that was gossiping when another person was listening intently.

"… and then Ted said to Professor McGonagall that it was absolutely ridiculous for even non-muggle born wizards not to…" Bertha trailed off as it seemed her avid audience of one was no longer paying any attention to her, but instead was gesturing wildly out of the window at a horde of fifth year Slytherins; some of whom she could not remember the names of.

"Antonin, is there something wrong?"

Antonin jumped sharply in his seat and turned around so quickly that he knocked his half empty cup of tea over.

"No, no." He replied, dabbing at the spilt tea with a napkin. "Just waving to some acquaintances of mine." He tried to plaster as much of a smile on his face as he could muster; there was only so much of Bertha's blether that he could tolerate. "How about we head to the Shrieking Shack now?" He tried to act calmly, afraid that his irritation with her would begin to show (if it wasn't already).

"Oh, no! I much prefer it here. It is so much more welcoming than that awfully rundown shack – and they say it's haunted." And off she went on a rant about the origins of the rumour and whether or not if anyone had actually seen these so-called ghosts.

Antonin was tempted to slam his head down repeatedly on the table, even if it meant getting cold tea in his hair.

Where was his Slytherin cunning when he needed it?


"Antonin Dolohov went to Madame Puddifoot's with Bertha Jorkins?!"

"Yeah, that's what I heard." These were the whispers that followed Antonin around for the next two weeks.

Needless to say, his attempts at directing that retched Jorkins girl towards the Shrieking Shack had failed magnificently, and he was now the laughing stalk of the school once again. First years were laughing at him! And he was even being shunted by his fellow Slytherins. This was doing no good for his Slytherin ego, none whatsoever. However, other than hexing her – and earning himself another detention with that muggle-loving idiot Flitwick – he had no other ideas as to how to humiliate her without risking detection. Merlin, be damned if he was going to let her get away unscathed.

No no-brain Hufflepuff was going get one over on a Slytherin! Especially not this Slytherin, Antonin thought. He marched confidently down to the Slytherin common room with an air of defiance, ready to talk tactics with Rabastan.

Antonin Dolohov was going to humiliate Bertha Jorkins once and for all!


End.